Do you have a secret love? An unrequited crush? Nothing weird, creepy or stalkerish... just that whenever you see that person your heart melts but you also you know you can never, for whatever reason, be in a relationship with them?
I sure do, a woman I met about five years ago - she is smart, funny and so, so gorgeous. She's also hetro and married, so that's that!! :laugh:
I find that since I've been on HRT my sexual feelings towards her have dropped away to nothing but the desire in my silly heart has grown stronger and even without the T in my system she has become even more beautiful to me. I have no intention of telling her, it would just make me feel silly and her awkward and I'd hate to ruin what we have in the way of friendship so she must forever remain my secret love!! ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡
Sigh. I got it bad! :icon_flower:
Yeah :) this one guy in my science class. He is so attractive and smart but kind of cocky. I've never talked to him at all so I don't know if this is stalkerish, it's just a crush
I have a bunch of them
Aww, so sweet!
I do. He is tall, skinny with beautiful dark eyes and tanned skin. He was really nice anfd warm and was very interested in what I had to say, I have his facebook but haven't seen him in awhile so I don't want to come across as stalkerish but the truth is that I am one :D
Yes. I always thought I was more lesbian oriented, but there is this guy I met in the area, straight, hetero and I do kind of melt when he is around. As I'm still presenting as male, he'll never know. (Sigh)
Ah, unrequited love. Thankfully, I am temporarily free.
Sometimes I wonder if there's any other kind. But there's so many beautiful people, taken by other beautiful people, it's so hard not to crush on some of them.
I have my SO whom I love to bits so I have blinkers on.
On the other hand, there are a few people of whom I am very fond. They are the ones that had life taken a few different twists and turns, I could have had further relationships with.
The cis male live-in boyfriend of one of my cis female important clients. I go to her house to give English lessons to her and her boyfriend, and <sigh> is he hot.
She is about 30 years old and he is about 34 years old or so. She has huge breasts and she is hot too, but I feel strangely attracted to HIM maybe a little more.
Especially HER is a high-level position at the large co she works at. He has a cute smile, nice face, and a great personality. He works in a highly responsible professional position, too.
He would never be able to be my boyfriend, but I feel so strongly attracted to him. They are a very happy couple. So I think this exactly what you are asking in this thread.
Another reason he could never be my lovely boyfriend is because my beautiful 26 year old cis girlfriend told me she might be moving into my apt. in mid-August, which would be fantastic. She is SO accepting of my developing breasts, and just LOVES that I now can emotionally understand her and other females at a deeply intuitive level which is thanks to the profound mental changes I have experienced since starting HRT 7 weeks ago. Thank god for our beloved estrogen and progesterone!
If it sounds like I am bi, yes, I probably am. I am probably bi as a male, and bi as a female.
SO, there, I said it. You heard from the real me.
:)
Hugs,
Johanna.
No, I've had my heart on lockdown for a few decades now.
But with that said, there are a few I've been attracted to, but its fleeting and I wouldn't allow myself to go beyond a quick thought over it.
I get these from time to time, but, thing is, I know they're not real. If I'm not already in a relationship with someone, whatever I feel is based on external stuff, whereas what matters in making a good match is how well we get along.
I find I need to date someone for quite a while before a true connection starts to blossom.
But if that flutter in your heart makes you feel good, who am I to knock it?
I have no idea as I can never tell if I feel that way about a person, not even sure how it feels.
That said my friend seems to think I have about three crushes, based on her own experiences and how I act when I talk about the said three, personally I don't think I talk about them any differently than when I talk about others'. XD
Well, I think I'm secretly in love with Ms Grace, melanie maritz, Stephaniec and a few hundred other wonderful humans on this forum but... oops. It's not a secret anymore. ;)
Years ago when I worked in office buildings I was always having crushes on the women who worked there. They were usually married and unavailable. One time I was talking to a the UPS guy in the mailroom when one of my crushes walked (to me she seemed to float) past the doorway. She was in her early 20s, very tall, thin and kind of geeky. I happened to say to the guy "I just love her". I miscalculated the range of my voice to the adjacent cubicles and word got around. It was a bit embarrassing. Sadly, she was engaged and married soon after.
~ Lyric ~
I have experienced a distinct change in my crushes as our Ms Grace detailed. Being in transition and on HRT my T driven sex drive is finally calm and it is much easier to understand the difference between lust and love. I once lived in near constant lust in our world full of beautiful people. I also understand that many of my former crushes on women were more about wanting to be them and feel so femininely sensuous. Now i feel a greater capacity to feel romantic love and ability to differentiate that from just being gd horny. Significant changes in intimacy with a more stereotypically slow warm up is another reward.
I do my best not to have secrets anymore and Grace's diplomatic recognition of keeping a good friendship is more good advice.
His name is Darrel. I've known him for about 5 years. He is one of the best pool players I know. He also has a huge crush on me. Of course, I'm married to my Beloved Cookie, and Cookie is aware that Darrel and I have the hots for each other. This does not concern her. I do not have infidelity in my heart, and I never have. Also Darrel has no idea that I once experienced gender transition. There's just no telling how he would take that bit of trivia about my past.
Darrel is slightly overweight, boyishly handsome with a round, lovely face and short blonde hair. He is extremely kind and thoughtful. And he is deadly with a pool cue; actually, he's a grand master. I've seen him tear up many excellent pool players, and I even saw him trounce a professional pool player once.
A lot of the male master pool players have been taking notice of me lately because my game is becoming extremely good. Last night I played a match against some very good players, and I won every game I played. Afterward Darrel was pushing me hard to ditch my current Scotch Doubles partner and team up with him for the championships this October. As much as I would love to do that, I do feel obligated to my current partner.
Perhaps Darrel and I will team up to smoke the competition at the 8 ball championships next spring. :)
I admit to having some romantic feelings towards an ex girlfriend of mine......I already dated her twice (both times as male). She does know that I am transitioning and is fine with it, and even wants me to hang out with her sometime. I just don't know though, I mean there were reasons why we split. She seems much more mature now, but I feel I am in too vulnerable of a position to get involved with her, but I can't stop my feelings. I also don't know that she would see me for the woman I am, not the person she used to know whom she thought was a man.
Unlike Grace, it seems my sexual attraction has increased on HRT, not in general, but to those people I really like. That and butterflies, ugh why do I get those when I talk to her? I used to be so calm and cool about things, I am a mess lol.
Quote from: Hikari on August 01, 2014, 02:11:38 PM
I admit to having some romantic feelings towards an ex girlfriend of mine......I already dated her twice (both times as male). She does know that I am transitioning and is fine with it, and even wants me to hang out with her sometime. I just don't know though, I mean there were reasons why we split. She seems much more mature now, but I feel I am in too vulnerable of a position to get involved with her, but I can't stop my feelings. I also don't know that she would see me for the woman I am, not the person she used to know whom she thought was a man.
Unlike Grace, it seems my sexual attraction has increased on HRT, not in general, but to those people I really like. That and butterflies, ugh why do I get those when I talk to her? I used to be so calm and cool about things, I am a mess lol.
Hikari, You probably have more emotional reactions due to your female intuitive self shining through now, girl.
Your Tanner 4 almost Tanner 5 I STILL consider amazing. I don't know if I will reach THAT level, but things sure are off to a great start for me!.
I am so very happy, Hikari, that my beautiful cis gf accepts my developing breasts and nail polish and everything. She has already seen me dressed in a push-up bra and full female dress, and still says she likely wants to move in with me about mid-August.
But the live-in boyfriend of my important female client that I mentioned above in this thread, he is off-limits because he is "taken" by my female client, and also because I want to be totally loyal to my cis g/f who seems about to move-in with me.
Johanna.
Fortunately I'm not crushing on her in that self destructive "why can't I be with her??" kind of way. I did that when I was a lot younger... there were a few young women I did crush on and it was not healthy at all. I wouldn't say they were fashion model attractive, in many ways they were ordinary women, very down to earth but there was something I found devastatingly gorgeous about them and I wanted to be with them forever. What a 'romantic'!
The first time was around 1984 and, although the term wasn't much in use then, my behaviour was rather stalkerish I'm ashamed to say. Luckily I was able to pull back before I did anything stupid (as opposed to creepy) and slap myself around the face a few times and admit I just needed to accept we wouldn't be together. The second time, about 1988, I became so depressed at my unrequited love for a fellow uni student I was seriously considering killing myself. :( I didn't (obviously!!), but it again required some serious talking to myself to get over her.
Ever since I've kind of had the unfortunate (sad? pathetic? defeatist?) attitude that I will never have a relationship with a woman I feel strongly attracted to - it was the only way I could head off what seemed like inevitable obsession and/or disappointment. The few times I have been in relationships, they have been with women I didn't fancy all that much for their looks but I did feel love them and I got along with them, so that's been my baseline for a relationship ever since. Probably why I haven't been in a relationship in about ten years!
Anyway, with this woman I'm crushing on at the moment, I'm just admitting it's a silly, pointless infatuation and can laugh about it. I don't feel obsessed by her and I'm not trying to invent reasons to be in her space or her face. I certainly appreciate (worship??) every minute I do spend in her company though. Gosh, she's gorgeous. :)
Call it a fondness, enjoy her company, and think no more of it. :)
Relationships are complicated funny things...
Because I'm a wee bit self-conscious, I feel I have to start by saying that I've been in an amazingly happy relationship for four years with a truly beautiful soul. I wasn't somebody that really believed joyful and resilient love would be possible for me but I'm happy to be proven wrong every single day. On top of that I was shocked to find out that it is possible for somebody to simply be incomparable, I used to think it was just a hackneyed romantic comment. I would never ever even consider disloyalty to her and would only ever accept the possibility of other partners if we somehow decided our mutual happiness would be served by things evolving in the direction of polyamory. Anyhoo, sorry if any of that made you roll your eyes. :D
Now I've written an anxious disclaimer I can say that I still obviously experience attraction to people and have a teeny tiny (well, small... Okay, quite large) unrequited crush on a friend of mine. He's witty, intimidatingly intelligent, vibrant, adorably shy, endlessly creative, and an astoundingly kind person that seems to live for making a difference to other people, whether that's via the job he's chosen or the way he uses his private time to guide people. Having gone through transition himself he often seems to be a rock to others. Physically he's stunning too, with wild hair, dazzling blue eyes, and amazing bone structure.
I think that there are several people here at Susan's that, given different circumstances I could really fall for, but I'm pretty well involved with a wonderful lady these last 45 years, so I don't entertain any silly ideas beyond a few little flirts with some of my favorite sisters here.
Grace, infatuation is a strange thing. Thank you so much for opening up about yourself before your first attempt at transitioning.
I did that myself years ago when I was feeling sort of a "male-type-lust" sometimes, combined with a total admiration of their great breasts and bodies. Girls who were hopelessly out of my league because they were so beautiful, they could get almost any guy they wanted.
So maybe call that "crushing" in a hopeless situation, because there was simply no way I was going to get the attention of such drop-dead gorgeous girls who had dozens of pursuers.
Now it is different. I feel attracted to drop-dead gorgeous girls (and to hunky guys, too!), but I want to have their body and breasts so much more strongly.
This is even more intense for me now that I am 7 week into HRT. But on these powerful female hormones, it is MUCH less sexual, and much more a total attraction and a desire to have breasts and hair like them.
I want to have breasts bigger than the size 32B of my beautiful cis g/f.
Johanna.
I wonder how common it is for someone to have a crush on a person who has a crush right back at them... but neither of them know!
If anyone in my (non internet) life has ever had a crush on me I've never known... :(
Quote from: Ms Grace on August 02, 2014, 12:05:00 AM
I wonder how common it is for someone to have a crush on a person who has a crush right back at them... but neither of them know!
If anyone in my (non internet) life has ever had a crush on me I've never known... :(
If my friends are to be believed, this has happened to me no less than three times. I get
ridiculously shy when around someone I've got a crush on. Not that I'm very outspoken to begin with. So I never really gave myself the chance to find out.
I kind of hope it's a common thing, so I can feel like it's not just me. ;D
I have had a few, One with a feisty girl at work. I was her boss, so wrong. She was very opinionated just like me.
We kept in touch for any years but she showed no interest. Would have been fun but I had so many issues after the accident.
I also have a crush on my GP. Very nice person and so helpful. If only...
Oh well.
A big eye opener for me was about a girl in high school. She was beautiful and had a vivacious personality, all the boys drooled and fantasized over her. It seemed as if she was unapproachable and was always surrounded by a few big high school lettered jocks.
Years later I met her in a grocery store, we stopped and had coffee and talked about our children. I confessed about the crush I had on her back in those days and she said, "I wish you would have told me that back then because it seemed as if I was being dominated by just two big dummies and I would have loved to be close to you back then!" The whole encounter left me musing about how silly we human beings are being so timid at times when our time here is really so incredibly short.
Well since I can't tell when I have crushes on anyone, it leads to my honestly believing I wouldn't know if someone had a crush on me or had feelings for me period......Well I doubt anyone ever would anyway.
Quote from: Shantel on August 02, 2014, 11:28:11 AM
A big eye opener for me was about a girl in high school. She was beautiful and had a vivacious personality, all the boys drooled and fantasized over her. It seemed as if she was unapproachable and was always surrounded by a few big high school lettered jocks.
Years later I met her in a grocery store, we stopped and had coffee and talked about our children. I confessed about the crush I had on her back in those days and she said, "I wish you would have told me that back then because it seemed as if I was being dominated by just two big dummies and I would have loved to be close to you back then!" The whole encounter left me musing about how silly we human beings are being so timid at times when our time here is really so incredibly short.
Shantel, honey, wow, great words of wisdom there.
Maybe I shouldn't have felt so intimidated around drop-dead gorgeous girls in high school. I really didn't try, because I felt they were "out of my league."
But life is too short for this.
I am 56, I have discovered that I am female, with great results so far.
Love and crushes are so amazing, and come in so many different forms.
Hugs,
Johanna.
I know a couple who were briefly at the same school together, who both (somewhat drunkenly) told the other some 25 years later they had had a crush on them. They're now married! :)
Quote from: Ms Grace on August 02, 2014, 06:15:58 PM
I know a couple who were briefly at the same school together, who both (somewhat drunkenly) told the other some 25 years later they had had a crush on them. They're now married! :)
Grace, what a heartwarming story! I guess it is never necessarily "too late." Never say never!
Grace, my dear, you are an inspiration to me, and I think to many others here. Not only are you hot-looking, but your insights are so positive.
You have a certain "way" about you that always seems to look to the positive.
Big hugs,
Johanna.
First let me say that I'm in a happy relationship with the the most awesome girl in the world and I'd never do anything to hurt her or act on any of the following.
About a month ago I met this really great guy through a group of mutual friends, since then we've both attended several events and he's funny, handsome, polite, generous, well spoken and we like the same music, movies and have the same interests. My knees get a little weak and I get a knot in my stomach just writing this. I get the feeling he's interested although it's hard to tell for sure since he's mild mannered and knows that I'm in a long term relationship.
I've been with guys before I started my transition but never anything serious, now I'm wondering if the estrogen is a part of the equation or if it's just that I'm starting to feel like a girl or if it's just that he's such a great guy.
Quote from: antonia on August 03, 2014, 07:18:53 PM
First let me say that I'm in a happy relationship with the the most awesome girl in the world and I'd never do anything to hurt her or act on any of the following.
About a month ago I met this really great guy through a group of mutual friends, since then we've both attended several events and he's funny, handsome, polite, generous, well spoken and we like the same music, movies and have the same interests. My knees get a little weak and I get a knot in my stomach just writing this. I get the feeling he's interested although it's hard to tell for sure since he's mild mannered and knows that I'm in a long term relationship.
I've been with guys before I started my transition but never anything serious, now I'm wondering if the estrogen is a part of the equation or if it's just that I'm starting to feel like a girl or if it's just that he's such a great guy.
Hi Antonia, Yes since I started HRT I have felt more attraction to hot guys. But I have a beautiful cis girlfriend who says she wants to move in with me in 2 weeks so I will stay with this great great great relationship at this time and see where it takes me.
Estrogen CAN and does make for major mental change, Antonia, in me, and many others.
I think I am bisexual as a male, and bisexual as a female, too. Yes, I had one guy in high school he was in love with me I think I wasn't in love with him but I wanted to please him physically down there (cannot say more since this is not the sexuality forum) so I let him have his way with me and I felt SO happy he felt happy! This was about 5 occasions.
Well, Antonia, you will have to see where your feelings and your heart takes you. I am "crushing" right now on the hot boyfriend one of my important female clients -- sigh! -- he is hot -- and this thread is about SECRET LOVE -- so it is perfect to confess this to everyone here...because he unattainable for me, since he is in a great live-in relationship his hot girlfriend who has big breasts, but she is an important client of mine, I earn good money from her.
::)
:P
>:-)
I am also "crushing" on my hot cis girlfriend...now SHE wants to move in with me...
Hugs,
Johanna.
My hot cis girlfriend also wants to help me with my makeup, polish my nails, help me with dresses, bras, and clothes, hair...whatever I need help on!
She is GREAT.
My life is amazing since I started HRT 7 weeks ago...what an awesome journey...all my work and personal relationships have turned better and better...I am closing more deals with clients, gotten more work at the University where I am a Professor...wow..
And yes, I am crushing on some hot unattainable guys...secret loves.
Life is amazing sometimes, isn't it?
Johanna.
someone i knew on another lgtb based forum is an ftm guy
a realy cool person and i though hes cool up untill i actualy got to meet him in real life and i realy started to like him[ he was very very nice cool and lovely]
i still like him but for some reason he had decided to ignore me for the last couple of weeks and i think it only derails from here
I guess they were not kidding when they said it's a second puberty, I was prepared for the physical aspect but the emotional part is a bit overwhelming at times.
Honestly I'm enjoying every minute of it, it feels ..... natural and wonderful to explore these emotions but I'll leave it at that.
Quote from: JohannaJohn on August 03, 2014, 10:03:53 PM
Hi Antonia, Yes since I started HRT I have felt more attraction to hot guys. But I have a beautiful cis girlfriend who says she wants to move in with me in 2 weeks so I will stay with this great great great relationship at this time and see where it takes me.
Estrogen CAN and does make for major mental change, Antonia, in me, and many others.
I think I am bisexual as a male, and bisexual as a female, too. Yes, I had one guy in high school he was in love with me I think I wasn't in love with him but I wanted to please him physically down there (cannot say more since this is not the sexuality forum) so I let him have his way with me and I felt SO happy he felt happy! This was about 5 occasions.
Well, Antonia, you will have to see where your feelings and your heart takes you. I am "crushing" right now on the hot boyfriend one of my important female clients -- sigh! -- he is hot -- and this thread is about SECRET LOVE -- so it is perfect to confess this to everyone here...because he unattainable for me, since he is in a great live-in relationship his hot girlfriend who has big breasts, but she is an important client of mine, I earn good money from her.
::)
:P
>:-)
I am also "crushing" on my hot cis girlfriend...now SHE wants to move in with me...
Hugs,
Johanna.
The impact that transition often has on sexuality is deeply interesting to me since, as far as I know, statistics consistently show that trans people are far more likely to be sexually fluidic and belong to a Rainbow sexuality (some estimates I've seen suggest it's the majority of us). It's why I'm not entirely keen on claiming that gender identity and sexual identity are entirely separate things in all cases. I understand if that separation is personally experienced and the pragmatic need to ensure gender identity isn't dismissed as a mere subset of sexual identity by bigots, including a lot of supposed medical professionals, but a feedback cycle does seem to exist between the two of them for a lot of people. When many people alter their performance of gender, including the sexual aspects of gender's function, it would appear to greatly colour perspective and cause people to explore performance of sexuality until a new identity evolves in that area too.
I'm both fearful and quite looking forward to seeing how increasing physical and social transition will impact on my present sexual identity. Simply letting go of shame and self-hatred in relation to my gender has altered my experience of attraction to other people a great deal already so who knows where things will go? I just hope I don't become purely androphilic since that would spell the end of the cherished relationship I have now.
I have a couple of secret crushes it will never get past that but that's ok for me, I am yet to start hrt so I don't know about that second puberty thing but I have always crushed on ppl in an emotional sense, sex has never really been a big thing for me it's mostly about the emotional attachment that I have with someone.
I do and it sucks. It's my best friend Megan but sadly she sees me as a sister so I highly doubt that anything can happen now.
Oh my YES! My secret crush/love. He is a salesman who calls on our company. He is drop dead gorgeous, with a beautiful face, perfect hands, a body that can't be denied by his clothes, he is tall - at least 6' 5", he speaks with the melt-me southern accent, he is blond, he is muscular, long legs and you can see hints of his muscular legs through his pants. He dresses so professionally perfect, he smells wonderful, and his blue pool for eyes --- oh how I could go for a dive in those and swim. And the way his eyes look at you, so dreamy, so come hither and he does not even know it. I swear next time I am going to tell him that he needs to be in a magazine so he can be admired by many; you think he knows it? Oh he makes me want to bite my tongue! If I told you his name -- that too is perfect. Now I truly know what it means "he can stop a clock"... I could stare at him for hours.
But I'm married and I can look and that's where it ends :-) A girl can dream, no?
There is this woman that I have contact from time to time through work who I think could possibly become my absolute best friend. Unfortunately I think that I would rapidly become romantically interested in her which would ruin the relationship so I have to settle for the occasional contact that I have.
Oh gosh yes! I get the most random crushes on guys, but lately some thing strange has been occurring. My whole life I have been into biological males, but now I would like to date a trans guy. Is this weird? They are very cute, and you would not have to live with the fear that the guy will find out. When I was younger this occurred to me, and it can very ugly. It's a miracle I am still alive. Being in a relationship before SRS is dangerous, but now they will always know before it gets serious. I'm undergoing SRS in February.
I don't know if I still do but maybe if I saw her again I probably would. It was this girl back when I was in school. She had red hair, was very different to most girls at school (so beautiful!) and was the only girl I ever met who had similar interest to me. She was the only girl to EVER speak to me back then and even asked me to sit next to her in class. My heart literally melted every. single. time I saw her. Oh my gosh. ;x My life back then was nothing worth living for, it was horrible. I was empty, extremely depressed, anxious, had no self-worth (you get the idea)... I absolutely hated school. It was so weird though because she gave me motivation to go every day just to even see her. Argh. There were so many times over a few years where I just wanted to speak to her but could not bring myself to do it (I'd get so nervous back then the thought of even doing that was almost impossible!). I don't think she's lesbian but it would've been really nice.
I was pretty crazy about her, she was always on my mind and that feeling took a long time to go away. I still remember her asking me to play this game with her online - no one ever invited me to anything. She'd always say bye to me at the end of school and even initiated conversations with me at times, that never happened to me before! I was very awkward and not me back then so we just ended up distancing away. I've had a few dreams about her and I'd always tell myself to not forget them and I haven't thought about them until now actually. I wish that dream didn't end, it was so beautiful and that feeling of love and having someone of my own was truly amazing. It's like a complete different feeling for me, something I never feel except for something like this. If there were any highlights during my school years it was getting the chance to even speak to her. :) Hopefully that doesn't sound too weird, lol! I'm pretty much over her but it's definitely something I won't forget.
My crush remembered something I mentioned last week and asked me about it yesterday. Sigh. :)
It's weird but this topic has gotten me thinking back to childhood. I grew up thinking I was transsexual but back in the 60's and at a young age, couldn't explain why I felt different than seemingly most of my friends and I never discussed it with them, and for the most part had crushes on girls as I thought I was essentially attracted to females.
But as I started to reminisce, I remembered one year going to summer camp with another friend of mine, and this was pre-puberty. There was a boy in the bunk across the way from me and there was just something about him and looking at it from a female perspective, I had a crush on him. He was just cute and I really don't know what the attraction was. But one day the camp was having a competition between two teams and the boy I went to camp with, my friend and I had decided to be on one team. My friend announced his team selection, then Gary, the crushee announced for the other team. I was heartbroken, I wanted to be on his team, so I switched and declared for Gary's team. My friend was kind of devastated and our friendship eventually waned because of my switching teams, and I never did get Gary's attention. To this day, although I can't remember what he looked like, he's the only boy from the cabin of about 50 of us whose name I remember and he still brings a smile to my face.
Quote from: traci_k on August 08, 2014, 06:49:41 AM
It's weird but this topic has gotten me thinking back to childhood. I grew up thinking I was transsexual but back in the 60's and at a young age, couldn't explain why I felt different than seemingly most of my friends and I never discussed it with them, and for the most part had crushes on girls as I thought I was essentially attracted to females.
But as I started to reminisce, I remembered one year going to summer camp with another friend of mine, and this was pre-puberty. There was a boy in the bunk across the way from me and there was just something about him and looking at it from a female perspective, I had a crush on him. He was just cute and I really don't know what the attraction was. But one day the camp was having a competition between two teams and the boy I went to camp with, my friend and I had decided to be on one team. My friend announced his team selection, then Gary, the crushee announced for the other team. I was heartbroken, I wanted to be on his team, so I switched and declared for Gary's team. My friend was kind of devastated and our friendship eventually waned because of my switching teams, and I never did get Gary's attention. To this day, although I can't remember what he looked like, he's the only boy from the cabin of about 50 of us whose name I remember and he still brings a smile to my face.
Hi Traci, It is possible that you were bisexual back then, and maybe still are but only YOU can determine that.
As I have mentioned in several posts here at Susan's I think that most of my life I have been bisexual as a male, but mostly acted on the hetereosexual side except in high school where I had a sexual relationsship with a guy. Now, 8 weeks on HRT, I feel a continuing quiet euphoria and exuberant euphoria 90% of the time...
And I am definitely crushing on one hot guy the live-in boyfriend of one of my female clients, at their house, several times a week.
Wow, she wasn't up to having an English lesson a couple of days ago, so instead of giving the lesson to both of them, I gave the lesson only to him.
I have to admit, this was a little hot to handle. I doubt he has any idea about my feelings for him, and he is totally taken by my female client so this would be an impossible relationship for me to attain...
Which is EXACTLY the purpose of the discussion in this great THREAD that Ms. Grace so kindly started, and that everyone seems to be enjoying a lot...
Hugs,
Johanna.
I can't allow myself any crushes as it would be dangerous. It might make me think a relationship with someone could ever be a possibility when I know it is not. Just one of the things I knew I would have to give up to transition. Being truly happy will just have to suffice. :(