I've been keeping my distance from my family in recent years because they're all kinds of dysfunctional and not nice to me. But this spring my grandmother died and we had a big reunion / funeral. I had to dress up and wear a pink pin with, "[Full Feminine Name], Granddaughter" on it. My aunt just sent me the pictures and... ouch.
That's my dad's side. They're a conservative midwestern family. The family farm has been sold, but they still have a midwestern farmer / business person mentality. Gender is treated like it's the most important part of your identity. Girls are raised to focus on the way they look, select a husband of good social status, and have a career that goes well with raising a family (teaching or nursing). Boys have more freedom career-wise as long as the family approves of their decision and they get married and have children. Self-expression is generally discouraged. Anyone who's not married or not employed in a family-approved job is considered crazy. My family hasn't gotten to know me much outside of my assigned gender. They haven't wanted to.
I tried coming out to my dad four years ago and it didn't work. Me questioning my gender identity is considered an embarrassing family secret. If I did transition, I have no idea what would happen. I'd probably lose contact with most of them for good. Or they'd try to intervene and stop me from transitioning. It's frustrating.
However, in those photos, I look like a man dressed as a woman, which I see as a good sign. On the other hand, I wish they weren't being passed around. Ugh. And I wish it was easier to be myself around my family.
I'm not sure why I'm posting this. I know a lot of us have difficult family situations and some have it a lot worse than I do. It's something I struggle with, though. It's hard wanting to live as a man when your family just wants you to look pretty, pick a good husband, and have a bunch of kids. When they believe that should take priority over your own happiness, that life isn't about who you are or what you want but about passing on your genes and making your family appear respectable.
Dude, I feel for you. I've been very distant with my family recently, even though my mom and I are extremely close. It's just tough when she uses the wrong pronouns and everything even though I'm not out so it's understandable why she uses them. Ugh, pictures. Double ugh. I feel your pain. I cannot stand pictures, and when I see them I'm like, that's me? I like don't recognize me, and definitely don't like how I look right now. Are you seeing a therapist currently, they might help with figuring everything out? I finally realized I have to live my life, even though my parents want me to marry a girl and have children. I feel the same way you do about venting cuz there are people here in really bad situations, but everyone handles everything differently. So post away, we're all family here!;D Or if you want, I'm just a message away dude!;)