My son is wonderful.. he accepts and gets it.. not sure how but he does and loves me.. I can't explain it but I loved him before I came out but now... omg.. I am over the top about him.. he is a wonderful human and his wife and family is too.
Anyway, he thinks its time to let go of the dude once and for all..
I asked him why and he said because I am not the same at all.. the dude is gone
He wants to have a proper burial and wake...
I know he is just kidding .. I think?... I said have i really changed that much... and yes .. I suppose I have.. YEA!
I just wish after the funeral they would give me my life insurance policy.. that would be cool!
Life is good.. its good to be here.... A year ago I thought I would end it all.. glad I did not do that.. came close to it though..
Carrie
Thats amazing. Your son sounds supportive and like he's got a good sense of humor. Lol I like the way he thinks!
All around though, the idea of having a funeral of sorts for the you of the past seems like a pretty symbolic, freeing experience. Funerals are expensive, but maybe you could just bury a little chest with a picture that you feel represents the old you somewhere. Of course you wouldn't have to, but part of me feels like it would be an interesting experience.
No this isn't so silly, in fact thinking about it applied my own situation led to me having a wee cry.. Sometimes I feel so so selfish for taking away someone liked and loved by others, they really do deserve their time to grieve. My mum for example is really happy about my transition and I think she likes this new me a lot more; but she has lost her son and I worry so much that when I'm not there she must be grieving him. Even I sometimes miss the guy that I had tried to be for so long, he did have some great qualities. Damn more crying now sorry..
As I've been coming out to more and more people, I wonder if something like this idea could be appropriate to help give some kind of closure to those who love us.. ?
Claire
Ohhhh that is just the best, most inspirational story ever..!
Why not have a real funeral, and let everyone embrace and give recognition to the new person you've become..!
What a great symbolic idea..!
If your son would like this I say have a nice funeral!!!! Maybe it might be good for you also. I'm sure there are some old things that need buried for good. You can wear black & dress nice. Thanks for posting & sharing. Great for you & your family.
Sounds like you did a wonderful piece of parenting to have a sensitive caring son. If there is a family backyard perhaps you could build a pyre & burn all your male clothes if you have any left and have your wake with speeches. A living funeral. I read in a popular best seller book "Tuesdays With Morrie," after the funeral of a friend of his died, he felt it was a shame his friend couldn't hear all the lovely words said about him. That is what Morrie wants at his funeral. I haven't finished the book yet to find out if that happened when he died. The book is written by Mitch a student of his Prof Morrie. Of course this is only about the male part of you that isn't anymore. Your son might have an idea.
Let us know what happens.
Jamie
I will keep update when I know what we will do...I think most likely it will be a big party and I will be of course full time and they can handle anyway they want. I hate bragging.. not one to do that so it will seem weird for me to hear them talk about the dude I was. Seems everyone misses him....very much... even extended family and friends.. I keep saying I am still here but they say its like a girl took over my body... and they are right about that.
My son and dude friends seem so male to me now.. macho and tough.. Its like guys just fill a room in a different way... My wife says I was the best at that...Now I get intimidated by dudes.. I suppose I have changed a bunch.... totally...
I went to the fair with my wife and when we were paying for parking the girl said thank you mam..... then said.. oh I am sorry sir!.. I just laughed.. :)
Carrie
I say why not do it. My family and I were talking the other night and something similar came up, but in my case it's celebrating my birthday not on the day I was born, but on the day I have my surgery.
What a great idea. I totally think you should enjoy the party and celebrate the dude who is gone and the new, fantastic you. Your son sounds like a great guy.
That is way cool that your son is so supportive. Awesome!
Life insurance or riot!
I'd say go for it. It could be therapeutic.
Your son and wife are gems.
I like the idea, a welcoming you party and burial parity. This puts it into perspective and end and a beginning.