Susan's Place Transgender Resources

For some reason puns are fun and can cheer up an otherwise low moment.   It would be cool to see all responses here containing a pun of some sort.



So if your ready, bring 'em on!

Be careful what you wish for >:-). Sometimes it just might come true :angel:

Well for someone who trys to keep their attitude sunny side up
This is eggactly the thing we need
But when you boil down to it I've
Had such a busy day my mind is completely scrambled
Oh well I'm sure if I take it over easy for a while
My mind will be all fried up ready to yolk again
I just hope nobody poachers my ideas while I think.

This could get dangerous for me very quickly. You will all face my humor

:D

I need to get something off my chest
I'm scared shirtless about my top surgery consult tomorrow
now that you are abreast of my situation I'm going to bed

Eye hope it doesn't back lash on me too badly. Cornea puns help me see the vitreous humor in life.

Hot dog, a pun thread! I relish the opportunity to mustard up some puns!

And now, a word from our sponsor, Aunt Fanny's Buns & Rolls. Fanny says "If you like my buns, you're going to love my rolls!"

rolling in the dough, rolling in the dough,....

(https://encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcR_tX04BztAEQqrwYgdUNrN2Cy0OKwWRGp0nRmn-46e6dPujsLB2jEvbURb)          (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.pastrypal.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2009%2F07%2Fapricot-tart-dough-rolling.jpg&hash=3dc485e1ef369ceaa9cc2789c5bb6c0a9444eab5)




OH, NO!


          (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.ytimg.com%2Fvi%2FyYsOnfN5tIU%2F0.jpg&hash=5e2cda9553d1b128f7cc5ec3ff3689de1a2462bd)


Rolling in the doh!

Sea here I know it's late
I was having a whale of a time bobbing with a bouy
but as they say in school thinking kelps the brain.
So I'm sure if I dive deep I won't have to wade to far in
And come up with a not so fishy tale that salmon here will believe
Umm dam

Oh deer puns - rack them up.

http://r2-store.distractify.netdna-cdn.com/postimage/201409/48/9de49002e18675211e78275270d402eb_650x.jpg (http://r2-store.distractify.netdna-cdn.com/postimage/201409/48/9de49002e18675211e78275270d402eb_650x.jpg)

Me thinks those animals where making waves with each other on porpoise

These are terrible, you should all be PUNished. Off to the punitentiary with you!

This is a golden thread but remember there may be gilt associated with joining.

I thought it was get tree to a shrubbery.

I'll have to check tomorrow, I'm bushed.

Mmm I normally have a well of ideas, but lately I'm all dried up
Well I could turn the tap again and see what flows out
But I don't want to faucet
The puns are are much better when they naturally spring to mind

My car got a flat and I had to change it, now I'm all tired out.

Let me dust off an old Jill-ism

*clears throat*

Ad homonym - A logical fallacy in which a person is attacked by a bad pun

Interesting fact;
3.14% of saliors are pirates

Never lie to a x-ray technician. They'll see right through you

I was polishing my new antique table when it disappeared.  Apparently I had varnished it totally from view.

You have cat to be kitten me right meow!

Anyone see the stockbroker chicken get the red card in the weekends football match? Professional fowl

A true one.

I was in a cab going to another hospital for work stuff. A Steggles chicken truck (Aussie chicken supplier) had broken down at the lights.

The driver asked 'I wonder why the police are here?'

I replied 'In case of fowl play?'

He didn't even respond!!

Jeez punortunity of a life time and a fail

A friend named their iphone The Titanic. It's syncing now

(what too soon)

Seven days of creating puns makes on weak

Anyone else stuck into this new book history of glue making?

Ever notice a person can be both a optimist and a pestimist?

By Spider Robinson
A pun by Long Drink, at Callahan's  – "Gentlemen, the story I am about to relate takes place in the distant future. Interstellar travel is commonplace; contacts with alien races are familiar experiences. One day, however, a planet is discovered out Antares way whose sole inhabitant is an enormous humanoid, three miles high and made of granite. At first it is mistaken for an immense statue left by some vanished race of giants, for it squats motionless on a yellow plain, exhibiting no outward sign of life. It has legs, but it never rises to walk on them. It has a mouth, but never eats or speaks. It has what appears to be a perfectly functional brain, the size of a four-story condominium, but the organ lies dormant, electrochemical activity at a standstill. Yet it lives.

"This puzzles the heck out of the scientists, who try everything they can think of to get some sign of life from the behemoth – in vain. It just squats, motionless and seemingly thoughtless, until one day a xenobiologist, frustrated beyond endurance, screams, 'How could evolution give legs, mouth and brain to a creature that doesn't use them?"

"It happens that he's the first one to ask a direct question in the thing's presence. It rises with a thunderous rumble to its full height, scattering the clouds, thinks for a second, booms, 'IT COULDN'T,' and squats down again.

"'Great Scott!,' exclaims the xenobiologist, 'Of course! It only stands to reason.'"