If this seems slightly wandering please excuse me, I have a bit of a progesterone high and sleeping med buzz going on but wanted to put this idea out before it flew away.
I think that wealthy people who are able to transition without fear of money woes are divorced from the reality of the darker side of transition: transpeople going into sex work and being exploited or murdered, substance abuse, high suicide rates. I don't think that anyone owes anyone but I would love to see some of the wealthy people give to the community in the form of a trust fund or "transition scholarship" to help people cover costs. People who can't transition through NHS or aren't covered by insurance. I think this would be a wonderful thing and a source of hope for a lot of people. If I ever came into money it's something I've long decided I would do.
What do people think? Is it wishful thinking brought on by medication or a nice idea?
While I can't speak for anybody else, I a) had money growing up, this was due to my mother earning a very good wage and my father dying on the job and a trust fund was set up for me and b) I can understand & I see how hard some people do it.
Did it make my process easier? I guess it did because while I never had to worry about how I was going to pay for this or that I was able to have fun when others are working their backside off.
I also when I finished uni worked very very very hard, often working 13 days straight, 12 to 14 hours at a time and on call 24 hours a day, day off or not.
I also saw some things in that job that I beg that no one ever sees again.
Where money helped was I didn't have to look at sex work, I was able to invest & save what I was earning and not worry about paying for HRT or GRS or doctor visits.
I would love to see a trust fund, I would donate for sure, however it would need to be a world wide thing as I feel the states always wins out with these sort of things.
Quote from: Nicole on October 30, 2014, 11:53:08 PM
While I can't speak for anybody else, I a) had money growing up, this was due to my mother earning a very good wage and my father dying on the job and a trust fund was set up for me and b) I can understand & I see how hard some people do it.
Did it make my process easier? I guess it did because while I never had to worry about how I was going to pay for this or that I was able to have fun when others are working their backside off.
I also when I finished uni worked very very very hard, often working 13 days straight, 12 to 14 hours at a time and on call 24 hours a day, day off or not.
I also saw some things in that job that I beg that no one ever sees again.
Where money helped was I didn't have to look at sex work, I was able to invest & save what I was earning and not worry about paying for HRT or GRS or doctor visits.
I would love to see a trust fund, I would donate for sure, however it would need to be a world wide thing as I feel the states always wins out with these sort of things.
Definitely agreed. I would make it for all the people of the world.
If I ever get rich, all my extra money is going to my trans brothers, sisters and non-binaries to pay for their surgeries. I already give away a large portion of what very, very little I make. It will be no different if I become wealthy someday.
Quote from: Wynternight on October 30, 2014, 11:37:14 PM
I think that wealthy people who are able to transition without fear of money woes are divorced from the reality of the darker side of transition: transpeople going into sex work and being exploited or murdered, substance abuse, high suicide rates.
A bit of a blanket statement, no? We've seen a lot of generosity among the people on this site. Starting with our site's founder who has put a small fortune of her own money into creating a safe place for us.
Quote from: Wynternight on October 30, 2014, 11:37:14 PM
I don't think that anyone owes anyone but I would love to see some of the wealthy people give to the community in the form of a trust fund or "transition scholarship" to help people cover costs. People who can't transition through NHS or aren't covered by insurance. I think this would be a wonderful thing and a source of hope for a lot of people. If I ever came into money it's something I've long decided I would do.
What do people think? Is it wishful thinking brought on by medication or a nice idea?
Yes, this would be a good thing, but only as an interim solution until we can convince policy makers to require insurance coverage of our conditions.
I'm reluctant to post, but I will because it is important.
Susan has given her life and financial stability to this site to help - you. Whoever you may be, anyone, any person who joins. The site is free to access and use. she wouldn't say no to some sort of contribution to help out - and that goes back to the site.
I've also given a little, not because I'm wealthy (I'm now broke) but because this site is important to me. It is important because it it does help you - whoever you may be.
I gave money to this site willingly and in the knowledge that it meant nothing - except to you. Whoever you are, a lost soul, a person struggling with your life, or with someone else's life, you are most welcome.
There are many philanthropists here, be they give $1 or $19,000 it is just the same. They care, they give what they can and they are wonderful caring people. Always remember $1 to one person is the same as $100 to another.
I will have a rant. I was forced into sexwork, I had drug and alcohol habits. I managed to get out of them. My struggle was no less than others, and no better. I have lived in gutters and in places you don't want to have nightmares about. I was wealthy, I will be again - and I shall give it away again when I am.
I just find it a bit rude to say that the wealthy have some sort of privilege in being trans*.
I will apologise if this post is seen as offence, it was not meant to be. It was meant to be blunt.
Cindy
Quote from: Wynternight on October 30, 2014, 11:37:14 PM
I think that wealthy people who are able to transition without fear of money woes are divorced from the reality of the darker side of transition: transpeople going into sex work and being exploited or murdered, substance abuse, high suicide rates.
Maybe, maybe not. I think they have different issues. Take Samantha Kane for example. Since s/he had the money, he underwent transition to a woman, then realized she wasn't happy and transitioned back into a man. But all of that must have been extremely traumatic, despite having money to deal with it.
QuoteI don't think that anyone owes anyone but I would love to see some of the wealthy people give to the community in the form of a trust fund or "transition scholarship" to help people cover costs. People who can't transition through NHS or aren't covered by insurance. I think this would be a wonderful thing and a source of hope for a lot of people. If I ever came into money it's something I've long decided I would do.
What do people think? Is it wishful thinking brought on by medication or a nice idea?
I'm not one to mandate spending of other people's money but I think if they are fine with a foundation to help less fortunate transgender people that would be nice. I think a lot of them do already do charitable giving as well as other things that can't really be counted in monetary terms. For example there are celebrities who transitioned in front of the public or are simply out to the world. They do a lot for the community by just being out there. . Laverne Cox, for example.
Yes I think some sort of fund for the ones in need would be something great. of course the hard job then would be to decide which of the applicats for grants will get the limited ressources. We had a bit of this when I transitioned. Not about surgeries, GRS was insurance covered anyways and other options basically did not really exist. But the support group actually had a house - it was there to provide those in need with a home. Mainly those who had to leave their families and lost their jobs and no homeowner would rent a flat to them. At that time, most transitioned at an age 40 or more and had a marriage and kids and usually lost those. That was in the 1980ies and early 1990ies. At the end of the 1990ies it somehow became useless as most people managed to at least stay with the family for a while or find some other place to live and people more often could keep their jobs and find a flat to rent. So it happened to me - I was 23, had to leave home, but managed to get by with a rented room and working in a porn company. Luckily I never had to do actual sex work, but I guess if GRS would not have been covered by insurance, I would have had to find something to make all that money. And at that age what can you do? Sex work, illegal stuff or selling your body for medical experiments maybe. Though I think that few transwomen will really get rich. They still often loose higher paying jobs and in the very least they will have to live with the gender gap in payment. But some do, and I think some of those already try to give. I personally can only give knowledge and advice, but who knows, maybe that changes one day ;)
I would definitely help others if I became rich (Lotto, PCH). I may be retired Military but the retirement check is not what people seem to think. I'm not working atm so...yeah.
A lot of medical is covered, but the expensive stuff (BA, SRS) are not by my Insurance. I'm trying to saving more now for the extra expenses down the road. Hopefully by the time I need it, I will have enough, if not, then I save longer.
This post wasn't intended to diminish anyones' contributions to the community so please don't take it as such. I'm very grateful for Susan and this site. If not I wouldn't be here. Just posting a thought experiment whilst a bit out of my mind on meds and grieving for a loss my family suffered this week. Maybe I didn't articulate my thoughts very well.
Quote from: Cindy on October 31, 2014, 08:40:53 AM
I'm reluctant to post, but I will because it is important.
Susan has given her life and financial stability to this site to help - you. Whoever you may be, anyone, any person who joins. The site is free to access and use. she wouldn't say no to some sort of contribution to help out - and that goes back to the site.
I've also given a little, not because I'm wealthy (I'm now broke) but because this site is important to me. It is important because it it does help you - whoever you may be.
I gave money to this site willingly and in the knowledge that it meant nothing - except to you. Whoever you are, a lost soul, a person struggling with your life, or with someone else's life, you are most welcome.
There are many philanthropists here, be they give $1 or $19,000 it is just the same. They care, they give what they can and they are wonderful caring people. Always remember $1 to one person is the same as $100 to another.
I will have a rant. I was forced into sexwork, I had drug and alcohol habits. I managed to get out of them. My struggle was no less than others, and no better. I have lived in gutters and in places you don't want to have nightmares about. I was wealthy, I will be again - and I shall give it away again when I am.
I just find it a bit rude to say that the wealthy have some sort of privilege in being trans*.
I will apologise if this post is seen as offence, it was not meant to be. It was meant to be blunt.
Cindy
I've often wished I was in a position to do such a thing, or for that matter, to have realized I was trans back in the days when I made a six figure (USD) salary. Right now I don't even have the funds to subscribe here, although it's on my to do list. Honestly, though, I think it would be better as a sort of co-op. People putting money in as they can and after say, 10% of the costs were put in to show good faith, getting a loan from the fund which they would pay back so that the next person could be served.
I'm going to say good idea but limit it to HRT only. It's easily the most important when physically transitioning and would allow the funds to help more people. Of course education related stuff might end up being more helpful if you can target the right people. Like an ad campaign that informs people transition services have been found medically necessary by such and such places and the reasons why it's important to cover it. Most of the stuff that I see where we're cast in a positive light comes from websites that have a pro LGBT user base. Feels kinda like going into a sushi bar and saying you love sushi. Of course you do and everyone there is likely to be in agreement. Of course it's usually the same effectiveness if you go in and tell people eating sushi is nasty and they shouldn't be doing it. Especially if the place is for people who really love sushi and worship it. And yes I just compared the liberal and conservative spaces to a sushi bar. *Puts on cool sun glasses and tries to walk out all cool but ends up walking into a wall*.... Don't put sunglasses on inside x.x
Quote from: Joanna Dark on November 01, 2014, 05:57:37 PM
You do realize that the United States has the worst access to trans coverage on insurance and basically every other trans issue, right? If you want to bash America, go ahead, I'll join in, but be honest, the states win out on trans right? What's next, prisoner's rights? Drug treatment? I'm not familiar with ANZAC countries, but I doubt it's as bad as here, where people spit on little girls, not literally, for wanting to use the bathroom.
So you would want trans people from all over the world to donate yet only those in the states could access it?
What about Brazil? They had 130 more trans murders than the US last year. Would they have access to it?
You do know there is a world outside of the US right?
If it was for those in the us only, I wouldn't donate
There's a world outside the USA? Wow. Thanks for letting me know. As you can see, and saw, i deleted my comment, cause I care not to argue as I have much bigger problems. I'm not going to compete on who kills more trans persons. You win.
:police: Please remember to be civil and respectful of one another.
Eh. Most of this would be solved (at least in the states) if we had a comprehensive nondiscrimination ordinance pertaining to healthcare. We keep talking about trans kids, and their right to use the bathroom (utterly foolish thing to focus our energy on as a community if you ask me) when that's what it takes. If you are middle class, and you break a leg, you go to the hospital, they fix it up, and your insurance pays for most of the cost. If you'r trans-well, good luck coming up with twenty grand out of pocket.
And wow. I'm sort of disappointed that we cannot even have a conversation about the obsticles we face as a community without exchanging blows. Yes, Brazil has an epidemic of violence. Does that make the lack of access to healthcare in the US any less of an issue? No it does not. Is it marginally possible for you all to accept that we all have issues no matter where we live, and all of those issues are valid?
I guess one thing would also be worth thinking of. Maybe it is possible to collect money and fund an organization that creates a situation where insurances have to pay for the procedures? Make it a law? Here in Germany in the 1980ies trans people managed to get TS accepted as basically an illness. They had to create a special rule for that since sadly transsexuality was in the ICD F section (F64.0) for mental illness, which usually does not allow surgical intervention. Now that in ICD-11 it looks like it will finally come out of the F section, I think this is a new chance to get this done better. If it is accepted by the medical community and by law as something akin to a severe body deformation, diabetes, heart diseases, Androgenital syndrome etc, there would be a basis to force it upon the insurances to pay for it. It may be harder in neoliberal countries like the US (or probably Brazil), because the insurance companies can just pick and choose largely and a customer has to carefully choose. But I somehow doubt that an insurance can exclude medical treantments for birth defects as a "prior condition" (since it would be so in all cases).
Anyways wha tI was saying was is that maybe it would be a worthy cause to sepnd money on to fund such endeavors that will improve ths situation for all, but I agree that something like a cheap and accessible credit should be created for those who need it now. After all in most cases even if the person is jobless and depressed at the time of the credit approval (a state in which no other bank would give a credit), after the credit is used for surgeries and treatments, those people very often will be happier and able to finally get work, now that they are not dysphoric or non-passing anymore.
Quote from: Wynternight on October 31, 2014, 10:13:14 AM
This post wasn't intended to diminish anyones' contributions to the community so please don't take it as such. I'm very grateful for Susan and this site. If not I wouldn't be here. Just posting a thought experiment whilst a bit out of my mind on meds and grieving for a loss my family suffered this week. Maybe I didn't articulate my thoughts very well.
I do appreciate this site a lot and well it's really well known in TG community as it's our home. As long as this place is up, I will be here. I understood your post and I do agree, it would be a welcoming thing for those who are little better off to help their brother or sister. Though, they really don't need to feel obligated. Everyone comes from all different walks of life... what may seem rich to one person may seem not rich to another. If you say to yourself you can do this, it will happen! No matter how rich or poor you are, God will open the doors for you and help show you the way. I am sorry to hear about your loss, and my prayers are with you :) Keep good thoughts and chin high.
OK this comment is just for people living in the USA, I think the money would be better spent on lawyers to challenge trans rights as far as health care. We have this whole new "obamacare" health care reform, which I am grateful for because I otherwise couldn't afford health insurance. It also made it illegal to be turned down for a "preexisting condition", which the insurance companies claimed being trans was in the past for me and denied my applications.
But it's still legal and most plans include some language that "any care or procedures related to being transgendered, even if backed by a psychological diagnosis, are not covered".
So what other things are specifically allowed to be not covered by law, after being diagnosed? When I read my plan, we are basically singled out and everyone and everything else is covered. I could see limiting it to HRT and the required care that entails, but to blanket block all trans health care is just wrong. The way this is written, they could basically say any health problem I develop is related to my being on HRT and deny the claim. This needs to be challenged in court, along with a multitude of other trans rights violations, like some states blocking gender ID change etc.
Quote from: Stephe on November 08, 2014, 08:25:37 AM
OK this comment is just for people living in the USA, I think the money would be better spent on lawyers to challenge trans rights as far as health care. We have this whole new "obamacare" health care reform, which I am grateful for because I otherwise couldn't afford health insurance. It also made it illegal to be turned down for a "preexisting condition", which the insurance companies claimed being trans was in the past for me and denied my applications.
But it's still legal and most plans include some language that "any care or procedures related to being transgendered, even if backed by a psychological diagnosis, are not covered".
So what other things are specifically allowed to be not covered by law, after being diagnosed? When I read my plan, we are basically singled out and everyone and everything else is covered. I could see limiting it to HRT and the required care that entails, but to blanket block all trans health care is just wrong. The way this is written, they could basically say any health problem I develop is related to my being on HRT and deny the claim. This needs to be challenged in court, along with a multitude of other trans rights violations, like some states blocking gender ID change etc.
It's a slow process for sure but it's slowly turning the other way. I am moving to PA and I'm really blessed that in that state I can change my gender marker by simply having my therapist sign a document stating I have gender dysphoria. It's half a** backwards though. I live in Indiana at the moment, and it's really not that big on TG. However!!! Anthem BCBS will pay for SRS as long as you meed the standard requirements ... living as a woman for a year, HRT, laser hair removal, two therapist letters, etc... Now in PA, it's a fairly TG friendly state, obviously since it's easy to get gender marker changed there... but the BCBS in PA will not, under my understanding, cover SRS. Which is mind boggling and just can't figure out why not. -_-
Once upon a time, I would have had all the money I needed, but that source was my grandfather who died. All the money I get now is from SSI. The only thing I'll be able to afford without a headache is HRT. Everything else depends on whoever is willing to help. So, if I suddenly ended up with millions I would help someone with all that they need, because I could use that help right now.
Some might call me wealthy, I think that would be a mischaracterization. I am the kind of person that quantifies things, my wage is actually public information as I am a government worker, it's been published in the St Louis Post Dispatch a few times, and it's well under 50k a year.
Still I find my employment and accompanying benefits satisfying. It's been a challenge from dropping out of school, to truck driving through my twenties to prying my way into government work. My destiny of transition has taken a bit over fifteen years to achieve critical mass, and two years to execute.
It's not an overnight process and I don't support it to be so, nor should it be a give away. I do wish that people in the future have an easier time than I did, Not sure where to go with this other than what I already support, healthcare including therapy coverage.
Wynternight, I think that you ask a very interesting albeit sensitive question. It would be good if some of the very few wealthy transgender people were to create some kind of foundation etc., but I fear that they would be swamped, and politically speaking, accused of supporting frivolous or morally questionable aims. In my experience, only the rich in the USA have had the money and will (and tax breaks?) to do this.
I think we need to consider other ways to contribute - time, effort, a bit of behind-the-scenes manipulation of the political and industrial classes, volunteering to help what is often a badly organised community, and so on...
Julia
What really sucks for me is that I was in Oregon from May 2013 to May of this year, waiting and waiting for my Medicaid to be approved. Well, it finally did after I came back to Texas. Oregon's Medicaid will cover transgender health starting next year. If I had known this then I would have found a way to stay. :/
http://www.advocate.com/politics/transgender/2014/08/15/oregon-removes-state-medicaids-trans-exclusions
Quote from: Julia-Madrid on November 08, 2014, 10:30:41 AM
Wynternight, I think that you ask a very interesting albeit sensitive question. It would be good if some of the very few wealthy transgender people were to create some kind of foundation etc., but I fear that they would be swamped, and politically speaking, accused of supporting frivolous or morally questionable aims. In my experience, only the rich in the USA have had the money and will (and tax breaks?) to do this.
I think we need to consider other ways to contribute - time, effort, a bit of behind-the-scenes manipulation of the political and industrial classes, volunteering to help what is often a badly organised community, and so on...
Julia
A topic came up last night in the support group I attend that got me thinking. The issue brought up was a dearth of providers in Anchorage, or providers who are known to the community, who are knowledgeable and willing to take on trans clients. The idea that came to me was, if there aren't people who provide medical and psych services to the community then we make some who do. We contact people in our localities, ask them if they're willing to work with us, and teach them how to do so, who we are, and what we need.
If no support system exists then create one. Perhaps that's the grassroots kind of effort we need to create change.
Quote from: Illuminess on November 08, 2014, 10:31:03 AM
What really sucks for me is that I was in Oregon from May 2013 to May of this year, waiting and waiting for my Medicaid to be approved. Well, it finally did after I came back to Texas. Oregon's Medicaid will cover transgender health starting next year. If I had known this then I would have found a way to stay. :/
http://www.advocate.com/politics/transgender/2014/08/15/oregon-removes-state-medicaids-trans-exclusions
Is it possible for you to move back?
Quote from: Wynternight on November 08, 2014, 12:39:08 PM
Is it possible for you to move back?
I don't know anyone up there anymore, and I can't afford it. Plus, I've made new friends since coming back to Texas. So, here I stay, for now. I do want to return eventually, but only when I know for sure that it's possible. God, I miss Portland...
Quote from: Illuminess on November 08, 2014, 01:12:17 PM
I don't know anyone up there anymore, and I can't afford it. Plus, I've made new friends since coming back to Texas. So, here I stay, for now. I do want to return eventually, but only when I know for sure that it's possible. God, I miss Portland...
I can't imagine trying to transition in Texas outside of Austin. Where in Texas are you?
Quote from: Wynternight on November 08, 2014, 01:31:47 PM
I can't imagine trying to transition in Texas outside of Austin. Where in Texas are you?
Houston, Clear Lake City. I'm less than an hour from Galveston. I have to live where it's cheapest for me, and right now I only pay $200 a month to rent a room with some friends. After rent, meds, phone, gas and food I don't have much left out of my monthly check. I wish I had a job writing all day like for Cracked or some alt. news webzine.
Quote from: Illuminess on November 08, 2014, 02:08:50 PM
Houston, Clear Lake City. I'm less than an hour from Galveston. I have to live where it's cheapest for me, and right now I only pay $200 a month to rent a room with some friends. After rent, meds, phone, gas and food I don't have much left out of my monthly check. I wish I had a job writing all day like for Cracked or some alt. news webzine.
Damn, up here in CT the cheapest you're getting a room in an apartment is like $450, and that's absolute floor cheapest. But then it's probably evened out by the social net for the poor being larger.
But to the question, yes wealthy people do have a privilege in regards to the financial aspects of transition as they do with most things financial, it's an inherent part of having lots of money vs having little money.
Quote from: 23 Skidoo on November 10, 2014, 01:32:52 PM
Damn, up here in CT the cheapest you're getting a room in an apartment is like $450, and that's absolute floor cheapest. But then it's probably evened out by the social net for the poor being larger.
But to the question, yes wealthy people do have a privilege in regards to the financial aspects of transition as they do with most things financial, it's an inherent part of having lots of money vs having little money.
Wealth is privilege. Just a fact. I kind of wish I had some. Right now I'm a multi-hundredaire.
Quote from: Wynternight on November 10, 2014, 02:12:04 PM
Wealth is privilege. Just a fact. I kind of wish I had some. Right now I'm a multi-hundredaire.
I have less than $50 in my bank account right now. :(
Mine is just over 3 digits, woot!
Money should not be a factor in whether people "get" to live.
Be it food, shelter, safety, security, medical care, or equal protection under the law.
People with a lot of disposable money have more access to these things, which is unfortunate not because they have access, but because others do not.
As a short-term solution, it is absolutely wonderful that there are people out there who donate what they can afford to help others. That is an absolute blessing, and I am personally and generally grateful to Susan, all donors to this site, and all people who have donated money (or even time, or a listening ear) to trans people in need of therapy, HRT, surgery, etc.
It would definitely be great to have more developed institutional solutions, from large-scale grant programs to insurance coverage to expanded welfare programs (not in the sense of a welfare check, more like the way the word is used for the "welfare state" systems in place in stone European/Nordic countries that ensure financial stability for education, child-rearing, and personal and professional growth).
My ideal society is one in which all people's basic needs are provided for. I have been told my views would change if I ever had a decent amount of money, but I truly hope that would not be the case, as like many others here I would like to put any wealth I accumulate toward helping others in my communities.
I think the major thread connecting all of us here is care and compassion for others. Many people come here questioning their identity, their sanity, their very lives, and then end up sticking around to help others come to terms with those same questions. Clearly this is a community with a lot of support to give - some of it financial, a lot of it emotional.
While wealth would ease a lot of my concerns about transition (not having to transition at work because I could afford time off, financial independence from emotionally unsupportive family, lower burden of costs of medical transition, ability to buy all new clothes to fit a changing body and avoid dysphoria), I would still need a great deal of emotional support. And that is the thing that is great about this community. It provides what money cannot buy.
If I had money, I would very likely feel an obligation to help others financially, just as I currently feel an obligation to help others emotionally because I have a mind and a heart that make me capable of doing so.
I, like Cindy, am kind of reluctant to reply to this post. But no one owes me anything. If I want it bad enough I will find a way. It is just what I may be willing to do. I don't really want to go too much into it but I ain't no angel with white feathery wings and I don't want anything from anyone because then I will feel I owe them. Unless it is someone that I will spend the rest of my life with and trly love. Other than that, nah. No one owes me anything and I owe no one anything either. I just owe myself.
Let me start off by saying, I am not rich and have never been rich. With that said, I managed to lose everything. My home, job and had no savings. I moved back home to start over. While staying at home I knew that this would be my only chance to transition. I took the chance and went for it. I found a job that pays well, but still not enough for me to move out on my own. Yet, I still decided to put what I had saved into my transition. I went to therapy, received my letter after 3 visits, and paid cash to my current doctor that does not take insurance to be put on T. My name change also was expensive and still not complete. I do have insurance and they covered at least the blood work but I will soon age out of my parents policy. Now that I am on t, I can manage the cost. I still need top surgery and I am saving up for it. I am well aware that I do need to move out of my parents home soon, so I must come up with a plan. I feel fortunate to be able to cover my costs but at the same time have failed to move out. A selfish act? Maybe, depends on how you see it. I made my bed, now I must lay in it. My family does not know that I am transitioning. I just started T a week ago. Already my voice has dropped. Changes are happening quickly. I have no idea what my family will do or say. Do I feel bad that I have gone through transition in secrecy, no because I feel more sad and alone that I can't share my transition with family. My work knows and are just as excited as I am about my current changes. I have no idea how my family will react and have an idea that it wont be so good. I have no idea on what I should do, except to continue to work hard, save to at least afford to live in someone's closet and afford top surgery by next year.