I've readt multiple times, that some girls experience mental changes when on HRT. And me being a worrier of nature, am asking you all.
Did HRT change you mentaly as well? And if yes, how and should I be worried?
I know hormones are different to everyone but I like to know what could happen. (And I'm just curious)
Hi Luna Star,
I can't answer for all and especially anyone that has suffered...
But for me, not really in a negative way, positively... Your mind starts to feel relaxed in who you are, as you see body change your senses change especially as more androgen suppression occurs, and I guess that's possibly where some might have issues...
For me it's been really good, I have needed to suppress my mind and emotional desire to shout out to the world who I am and how good I feel... Still after 10~11 + years... But have still not really come out... For many reasons that I now regret succumbing too.
Love Katy
Thanks for the answer! So if I get it right at least in your case. It's the you all along you see blooming, instead of the hormones changing you? + I didn't mean the changes are bad, in the cases I know about they were happy with themselves. Self-discovery is and has always been a big issue for me that's why :)
Well many of us certainly do hope for and then experience mental changes such as feeling right, calm, relief and even euphoria. There are any number of possibilities that have or will occur. I have met people who will not transition with HRT because they fear it may impact their ability to be an engineer or maintain their licensure. I don't think there is any good evidence that HRT effects our abilities to think clearly or critically and to continue to learn and love.
Worry never worked to change a thing for me. Your journey of self discovery is a story that can only be written by you.
Quote from: Tessa James on November 17, 2014, 04:02:10 PM
Well many of us certainly do hope...
Thanks for the answer.
I know that path is mine but whenever I'm interested/curious/worried about something. I tend to indulge myself in said subject and keep searching and read up information in my free time which can lead to the point where I become sleep deprived (happened to me before a few times). It has it's bad and good sides :D
I have been on HRT just over six weeks now and this is what I can tell you from my experience, there is a sense of relief. There is a sense of calm and there also is a sense of euphoria. I believe it's because on a molecular level. My body is starting to change to what I have been feeling all my life for me anyway. It was only a matter of a couple of days and I knew HRT was the right thing for me YMMV, you would know within a couple of weeks. If HRT is the right thing for you, so there wouldn't be any long-term changes, but mentally you'll feel it pretty quick. I wish you nothing but the best of luck in your journey and may the Angels always look upon you and help guide you on your path.
Hugs,
Melissa Ann
Hi Lune Star;
Unfortunately I cannot discuss dosages here, but what I can tel you is that for about 18 months I was on a low constant dose of Progynova only and my dysphoria basically went. I have slowly feminized (small B Cup breasts) added about 2" to my butt and hips and haves a feminine glow to my face with very soft skin all over and diminishing body hair. Also the mental changes have been great . I feel that mentally I am in a much better place. There is no mad desire to masturbate, libido has dropped and overall feel o much better. Anyway about 5 months ago my Endo increased my dosage and I then went into a sort of melancholic cloud. Sort of turned into a ditzy female. As an example I kept on driving off with my handbrake still on, lost my ability to judge distances and my reversing went out of the window. Spent hours gazing into space. Girl friends thought I was getting into depression, but it wasn't that I was just sort of cloudy. My Endo then decided that I really needed to increase it again (so effectively then double my original dose. (Bear in mind that I am on only Estrogen and no spire as my T Levels these days are less tun 0.5 so realistically I am hormonally 95% female. Well the cloud has been lifted completely, but I find myself mentally feeling very submissive, subdued and energy levels very reduced and my interest in everything female fashion, makeup, social interaction, even dare I say it men) has increased dramatically. Don't get me wrong al these mental changes, even the dramatically increasing feminisation (my boobs have added a lot of breast tissue to the side and are now quite evident under T shirts and when in the gym on the treadmill - so a Sports bra is mandatory now! The problem for ,e is that I am in a job where being on the ball 100% is required, so I have slipped back to my initial dosage, because whilst I love the mental and physical changes, I need some element of competitive push to earn my daily bread so as to speak!.
So the simple answer is yes there will be mental changes.
Hey Luna,
Going on about two weeks for HRT and changes are not really there physically, but mentally some.... for most part, the reason, is testosterone being blocked... and I can tell that's effective already, due to erections not being erections and the morning erections are no longer happening....
I just think you would be over worrying to think that estrogen will make you a very moody person and change who you are.. it isn't. When I started my transition process in August, I thought the same. I was worried of upsetting my boyfriend/now fiance' with emo like behavior that I could get with taking estrogen, and it really didn't happen... think it's more of a hype.
Time to time, I get a rush of excitement... it started soon after taking estrogen under the tongue rather than just swallowing it. I went back to swallowing it until I see my doctor first of December. Even without taking under tongue, I get this surge that I didn't used to get... my skin goes all goose bumpy, I get excited, and I want to just hug the first person I see... or cry at the first bad news I hear no matter how little it is... I am not sure if this is normal behavior but this is how I been affected since pretty much first week.
My fear of being in the wrong body has went down so has my mental medications... no longer on 3 or 4 psych meds to keep me happy... in fact, the doctor has weened me off them all... I know I am transitioning into the woman I have always meant to be and this is the most exciting thing ever, and it's like constantly reminding me that soon this life will be over and my new life will begin.
Hope this helps, just a little bit of my thoughts. Take care .. hugs
I didn't expect an immediate response after starting HRT, but I got one! It changed me profoundly from day one. In addition to the relief and excitement of finally having it, I very quickly (within an hour or two) was suffused with an incredible sense of calmness and wellbeing. There's a member here (I think she's a mod, but -- my apologies -- I can't remember who she is right now) whose custom user title says 'mind is quiet now'. I think that sums it up so well. For the first time in my life, I felt truly at peace with myself. The wellspring of stress, frustration and occasional aggression that I associate with testosterone immediately dried up (my partner laughs at the contrast between how I was when I got annoyed before and how I am now -- she also says I'm just a much nicer person all round ;p). It also made my dysphoria far less acute and self-destructive.
For the first week I felt an almost physical sense of euphoria, a sort of tingling warmth throughout my whole body. That faded as things became more normalised, but I continue to feel an enormous sense of peace and satisfaction -- delight, even -- and I find it much easier to relax. I don't get angry as much, and when I do, it's no longer explosive, it's more like a mild annoyance. Little things that irritated me before no longer bother me and I wonder why they ever did. I have more patience. I am much more sanguine about being myself and not worrying what people think of me, and about facing social situations that terrified me before. And yes, I am finding that I have some interest in / attraction to men, which would have been anathema to me while living as one myself.
I realise this might read as pretty idyllic or rose-tinted, but that's been my personal experience so far, and I can only speak for myself. I am definitely more emotional, and sometimes respond to things that would've annoyed me before by tearing up instead, or outright crying, but that has been a welcome relief in itself given how emotionally repressed I was before. I find it so much easier and more natural to express myself now.
Eleven weeks tomorrow. My experience was much like Alexis'. A few weeks further on I noticed I stopped having the emotional rush just after my dose. I guess either my body was getting used to it, or I had reached a sustainable level in my blood. Early on I reacted badly to missing a dose, if I didn't take it within a ten minute window I had panic attacks. That doesn't happen anymore.
I've been on HRT 2 weeks past 12 months. the best analogy for me is like having a dysphoric lobotomy.
Before I started I was concerned that HRT might affect my ability to work, which would have been a disaster. I need to think and focus a lot, and I work pretty hard. HRT didn't make any difference, except when I couldn't work due to being too depressed. In some ways though its easier to work more though when you're hiding from your problems.
I've experienced amazing positive changes much like everyone else. I can't say I really got any real personality changes, but I don't think it really matters if you did (assuming it doesn't make you dysfunctional and I've not heard of that). Say you went from being attracted to women to men - it might be disturbing to imagine it beforehand, but afterwards it's just normal. Its not forced from outside, its an internal thing.
I worry a lot too, and over think things. All my worries came to nothing and I wish I'd started sooner.
This has been on my mind the last couple of days, and this thread answered some questions. At about a week myself, I can't say I've noticed much - other than when start to beat myself up "for not doing anything" I'm finally able to say, "yes I am" and get that feeling to shut up. So that's a good thing :)
Yes I have had some mental changes :) Just feeling over all calmer & not as aggressive & feeling more at a sound state of mind. That & in the beginning I was a little more sensitive but that went away as my body adapted to the hormones. Or maybe I just got used to it? hahah I honestly forget a lot of the mental changes because they're the first thing that occurs & you adapt in a matter of months.
I think the key difference here is emotional vs mental. See I take it that mental means thinking processes and intelligence and so forth, whereas emotional means how you feel. Certainly HRT will frequently improve your emotional state, if how you feel was having an impact on how you were able to focus and think and clarity of mind then yes, definitely it will also change your mental state as well. Usually for the better.
I could never find myself lost in my town even in places I'd never been to. It's like I had a working compass in my brain. Now it's just kind of.... broken.
On reflection, my mental changes are that I am much more emotional, movies, stories, kids etc.... I blub or tear up so easily these days
L Katy
HRT for 3 years and here is my opinion.
Well in the first year is when all my mental changes occurred, they weren't personality changes but more outlook changes. I started to just find things affecting me differently, for instance I started to relate to sad stories where before HRT I would never care for a sad book or drama now I enjoyed them as they get me all teary and involved. I personally believe all mental changes are person dependent as for me it wasn't anything major.
I must say that knowing my brain was purely E controlled over T controlled gave me a sense of peace though.
Thank you all so much for all the answers :) , this answered a lot of my questions :D
Emotionally - so much better. My stress levels and anxiety is practically non-existent. It is incredible really. I have been on HRT for about 3 months and I can't imagine going back to the horribly feelings of previously. I am sure people on anti-depressants would describe it similarly. I feel like I finally woke up.
Intellectually - I am much more talkative and conversant. I think since the emotional stuff has cleared, I find myself thinking more clearly. I also recognize the emotions of others more easily, especially my wife.
Some of my interests have slightly changed, but not by much. I love shopping, though! :P
I don't know how I feel about some of the posts equating being stupid (or whatever) to being female. I don't have any modes cause I can only be gendered female, for better or worse, but I definitely get treated like I'm stupid for having boobs and a pretty face and I'm not. Sorry for the derailment, but I think that needs to be addressed. If you have some sort of fog, which may be related to HRT, but not to being female, then one should see a doctor and not consider it part of feminization. There may be some other issue at play. My motor skills and everything else is absolutkley the same.
But as long as I'm here, if you're going to start HRT, then you will change in many ways no matter how much you think you won't. Now, you could be lucky and privileged (I am and I acknowledge that privilege) and pass 100 percent or close to it even when you dress very butch (I dressed as butch as I could today and still got called babe and baby by men) and that will probably change you for the better. Or you could not pass, be full-time and things could go awesomely or you could become very bitter.
But, if you are considering HRT, YOU WILL CHANGE. There's no way changing and turning upside down how you are viewed will not change you.
Yes, I've experienced profound mental changes since I got my hormone levels stable.
I used to be angry and aggressive all the time, to the point where I was scared I might hurt someone. I was irritable, defensive, paranoid, and deeply insecure. I couldn't focus and my thoughts raced all the time, which just made me more angry and afraid.
For me, getting my T levels under control meant getting my life under control. Testosterone was literally driving me insane.
So yes, the mental changes from hormone therapy are real, and they are profound. But they can also be the one change that means the difference between life and death for some of us.
ahem... also I love shopping, fashion and clothes, so love nice clothing
L Katy
At a couple weeks under four months I don't really feel any different from before mentally. Maybe a somewhat higher propensity to cry but that's hard to say as I already cried before.
I did a search for mental effects of MTF HRT and found this thread. I just started E last week and am trying to prepare for what is coming. I sure hope that I have good emotional/mental results like what are described in this thread.
Hello again Ms G
Just to let you know there are plenty of HRT stories and details of people'e experiences including mental changes and emotional changes on the HRT Board.
Wishing you happiness and success.
Hugs
Pamela
Quote from: Rose City Rose on November 19, 2014, 01:46:34 AM
Yes, I've experienced profound mental changes since I got my hormone levels stable.
I used to be angry and aggressive all the time, to the point where I was scared I might hurt someone. I was irritable, defensive, paranoid, and deeply insecure. I couldn't focus and my thoughts raced all the time, which just made me more angry and afraid.
For me, getting my T levels under control meant getting my life under control. Testosterone was literally driving me insane.
So yes, the mental changes from hormone therapy are real, and they are profound. But they can also be the one change that means the difference between life and death for some of us.
I have to agree with you, Rose City Rose. I'm at 7 months on estradiol (I can't take Spiro or any other T-blockers), and I've essentially become a different person. Some of it's difficult to describe, but I feel calmer, more sensitive, much more emotional. I enjoy interacting with others more, even strangers. And like you, I seem to have shed the anger that created interpersonal messes for decades, and I'm very grateful for this.
I truly hope I can stay on my beloved patch for the rest of my life :)
Hugs
Lindy
Quote from: katrinaw on November 19, 2014, 05:58:55 AM
ahem... also I love shopping, fashion and clothes, so love nice clothing
L Katy
What would we do without our clothes, Katy!! As a male, I essentially wore a uniform every single day: jeans, hiking boots, drab shirts. Now I need color, patterns, nice fabrics! Skirts, dresses and cute little jackets. I feel so happy when I enter secondhand stores that I giggle :)
Happy shopping,
Lindy
Hello again Lindy
I have also experienced significant mental changes from HRT. I think our stories are similar in that we both went onto HRT and Laser and Electrolysis in 2018.
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,241374.0.html
Hugs
Pamela