Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Male to female transsexual talk (MTF) => Topic started by: Nicole on November 22, 2014, 04:56:54 AM

Title: "Like a girl"
Post by: Nicole on November 22, 2014, 04:56:54 AM
One of my friends a few months ago shared the following video with me, I watched it and I'm not someone who tears up over little things but the message in the video to me is so powerful.

So... this weekend I was asked to cover a big horse event in melbourne, its a 4 day event but after the first 2 days they noticed they needed a 2nd photographer. So I get there nice & early, unpack and set up, the first person walks in, the media manager and she's not much taller than me, says hello, thanks me, pays me (always good) and looks at my gear and says "Gee thats a big lens for a girl"
Yes its heavy, yes its big, but its big for a guy too you know.

So out I go, I start getting comments, on my gear, 2 guys sitting near where I'm shooting start talking to me about the lens, again the comment 'for a girl".

By lunch I had 15 people say the words "for a girl", by the end of the day I was smiling and nodding at the "for a girl" comment, but boy it pisses me off that its ok for a guy to carry a big lens and not get those comments.

I know its one of the little things in the world, I know I'll complain if a guy doesn't hold a door open for me and most likely complain if he did, but the line "for a girl" implies that we are useless and we need to stand up against the line.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XjJQBjWYDTs

I don't know, maybe I should enjoy the fact that people think we're the weaker sex, the sex less likely to be able to carry things, to open jars (btw bang the jar up-side-down twice on the bench for a little force and you'll open it easily), but its the 1 thing that gets to me
Title: Re: "Like a girl"
Post by: Sammy on November 22, 2014, 05:20:12 AM
Cause guys are afraid of competition and being beaten in areas where they do not have a genetically inherent and thus insurmountable advantage.

And that was very cool and touching video, btw - thank You for posting it :).
Title: Re: "Like a girl"
Post by: Indoctrinated on November 22, 2014, 06:47:13 AM
Beautiful video, Nicole. Thank you <3

Think being a girl isn't about being polite, kind or cute. It's more like having the courage to defy limits and always deny being inferior in any aspect. Sure girls can be polite, kind and cute but never submissive!

Title: Re: &quot;Like a girl&quot;
Post by: ImagineKate on November 22, 2014, 06:50:51 AM
 I really don't plan to stop camping, hiking, chopping wood, shooting, landscaping, climbing radio towers or anything else that typically girls do not do. :)
Title: Re: "Like a girl"
Post by: JulieBlair on November 22, 2014, 07:40:52 AM
I'm pretty tough for a girl, but I am confident and capable as a woman.  One of the advantages of being old is that I am treated less as a girl, and more as a woman.  There is a difference, and I think it is power.  I command professional courtesy from my peers, and am both given feminine deference, and personal respect from the world at large.  Perhaps I'm just a grumpy old bitch, but I have little desire to be anybody's sweet thing, in lieu of their beloved partner or friend.

lol, when I read this it sounds like I am a militant feminist, and actually I'm not except as it pertains to demanding recognition of my humanity as a person and a woman.  There I can be insistent and fierce... grrrrrrr!

Julie

PS Have a glorious summer and throw some shrimp on the barbie for me.  I'll be shivering for you :)
Title: Re: "Like a girl"
Post by: finallycomfortable on November 22, 2014, 09:54:04 AM
 Thanks  for the great informative  video  Nicole.

    JUlie,  i am in the boat with you.  And boy o boy  do the seas get rough  occasionally .  Mostly  because of  my  refusal to  deal with morons anymore  at  my age ( past 70 ).
  I  now know  I can't save the world as  I did soooo many times in past years ......... but  I do  believe I can still  save me  !
         My wife of many years  is  a godsend .


     feeling finallycomfortable  and learning every day....
Title: Re: "Like a girl"
Post by: JulieBlair on November 22, 2014, 12:39:37 PM
Quote from: finallycomfortable on November 22, 2014, 09:54:04 AM
Thanks  for the great informative  video  Nicole.

    JUlie,  i am in the boat with you.  And boy o boy  do the seas get rough  occasionally .  Mostly  because of  my  refusal to  deal with morons anymore  at  my age ( past 70 ).
  I  now know  I can't save the world as  I did soooo many times in past years ......... but  I do  believe I can still  save me  !
         My wife of many years  is  a godsend .


     feeling finallycomfortable  and learning every day....

:) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)
Title: Re: &quot;Like a girl&quot;
Post by: Nicole on November 22, 2014, 03:01:24 PM

Quote from: Hanazono on November 22, 2014, 09:44:35 AM
was it a 300/2.8 or larger?
I sure hope you had a monopod.

I would not have the strength to handhold such heavy lens without some support. if in the the unlikely situation where you were indeed hand holding it, salute you... steady hands for not so fast shutter too.

600 2.8 and yes monopod
Title: Re: "Like a girl"
Post by: Hideyoshi on November 22, 2014, 03:54:15 PM
I didn't buy this video when it came out, and I still don't buy it.

Humans are a sexually dimorphic species. That means that what sex someone is tends to determine several physical traits. Women tend to have wider hips, narrower shoulders, and men tend to have more muscle mass and more prominent adam's apples, to name just a teeny fraction of differences.

Why do the female children run and throw with such androgyny? Well, I remember all throughout school, no girls ran like a princess.

Why do the older people run with their arms flailing around? Because they are going off of cultural stereotypes. Why is running like that a stereotype? Sexual dimorphism and general professions in history.

In history, how much more common was it for a man to need to throw things professionally than a woman? Women weren't taught to throw as much as men were, so when the occasion came that they needed to throw something, they knew much less of the form of how to throw an object most effectively. Also, having more upper body strength meant a man is generally able to throw harder and faster than a woman. After the agricultural revolution, how much more necessary was it for a man to know how to run than a woman?

'Like a girl' in those areas is more akin to meaning 'like you don't know how to do it,' which isn't an insult. Ignorance is no crime and can be cured with knowledge and practice.

If people would accept the fact that men and women are inherently different, we'd have far less of this social justice feminist crap than we have today.
Title: Re: "Like a girl"
Post by: Dread_Faery on November 22, 2014, 05:46:40 PM
Occasionally someone tells me I'm a good skater... For a girl. They don't make the same mistake twice.
Title: Re: "Like a girl"
Post by: Tessa James on November 22, 2014, 06:01:18 PM
Years ago one of my sisters took me to task when I related feeling bad as a kid because people said I threw like a girl.  She was right to do so and now I am proud of what they saw in me so long ago.  Being a girl is on a much more elevated plane now and we can work toward recognition of value for all kids.

Yes, we clearly know that there are differences but the differences are dwarfed by our similarities and what we all share.  Humanity has a shared destiny and celebrating our strength and diversity seems best for a peaceful future. 
Title: Re: "Like a girl"
Post by: katrinaw on November 22, 2014, 06:23:19 PM
Video should be shown publically, its the sort of thing you hear occasionally and you think at the time that's not fair, everyone does things the way they do or are shown / taught... the video made me realise the effect on young girls, which is probably not widely considered, the potential damage of derogatory comments are know with racism, but totally overlooked in gender comments, very sad!

As for the Lens 300mm Lens can be hand held, as I keep a firm hold of the lens with my left hand resting my elbow against me or something solid and is OK at higher speeds... a 600mm wow even on a monopod at fast speeds I would be a little nervous, especially at a paid gig.

Nice work Nicole... and yes comments sounded very sexist or jealous  ;D

L Katy
Title: Re: "Like a girl"
Post by: amber roskamp on November 22, 2014, 06:24:13 PM
this video is amazing thank you for sharing..

Its sad how the world still views being a women as being less than a man. Its crazy how this belief is so deeply ingrained in our society.
Title: Re: &quot;Like a girl&quot;
Post by: Nicole on November 23, 2014, 04:12:11 AM

Quote from: katrinaw on November 22, 2014, 06:23:19 PM
Video should be shown publically, its the sort of thing you hear occasionally and you think at the time that's not fair, everyone does things the way they do or are shown / taught... the video made me realise the effect on young girls, which is probably not widely considered, the potential damage of derogatory comments are know with racism, but totally overlooked in gender comments, very sad!

As for the Lens 300mm Lens can be hand held, as I keep a firm hold of the lens with my left hand resting my elbow against me or something solid and is OK at higher speeds... a 600mm wow even on a monopod at fast speeds I would be a little nervous, especially at a paid gig.

Nice work Nicole... and yes comments sounded very sexist or jealous  ;D

L Katy
The lens is my favourite but I hardly get to use up these days, I'm shooting at 2000/s with it, so on a monopod it's great.
It wasn't that they were sexist, but it's like we're useless because we have breasts
Title: Re: &quot;Like a girl&quot;
Post by: Nicole on November 23, 2014, 04:54:14 AM
Its the f4, no idea why I put 2.8, could have been the long day, the bottle of wine.
And canon.
Its my only non 2.8 or wider.
Title: Re: "Like a girl"
Post by: katrinaw on November 23, 2014, 05:59:23 AM
A little off point... Nikon user myself, came from Olympus OM but looking maybe to head back to the Olympus camp... Equipment is so compact and was so robust!

Actually more on topic... not sure its the boobs  :laugh: but the fact, as per video; perceived as we are the weaker sex and can't do things as well  >:(

Amber  - So true  >:(


L Katy
Title: Re: "Like a girl"
Post by: Heather Erin on November 23, 2014, 12:12:31 PM
That's a lovely video. I work in education and was privileged to see the results of the children's wellbeing survey that happened. Girls confidence plummets and a lot of it is down to misogyny. Misogyny is something that has been playing on my mind particularly recently as I've been questioning whether to transition or not. Society is dictated by white middle class men and women are frequently "the weaker" or "fairer" sex. I see it when I work with children, girls like pink fluffy stuff and boys like blue and rough and tumble fighty things. It depresses me that society tells me what I like and what I don't. Yes I like pink, yes I like heels and dresses but i worry that people will think it's a societal construct. I am a woman whether I wear a dress or trousers. I am a woman whether I wear make up or not or have my hair short. I am a woman whatever.

Thank you for posting that video and for all the super discussion. By the way you're all amazing!
Title: Re: "Like a girl"
Post by: JenniR04 on November 23, 2014, 12:57:11 PM
Loved the video, thanks for sharing!