Hey so I know this is going to sound really really messed up. But this is literally what we're going through right now.
Basically, my girlfriend just came out as transgender over the summer, and before we started dating we were best friends. I educated her on what being transgender was, and I helped her find out who she is. That happened last year.
My girlfriend and I started dating 4 months ago. My girlfriend came out to her parents about 2 months before we started dating. Honestly, I would be with my girlfriend no matter what. I love her. Pre op or post op, it doesn't matter to me. The most important thing is that she's happy.
My girlfriend's mom thinks that her "son" is "becoming a girl" so "he" can date me since I'm a lesbian. She thinks that "he" likes me enough to "become a girl" for me. That is complete and utter bull->-bleeped-<-. I love her for who she is. I don't love her because she's going to change her body and honestly to make such a horrible assumption about me like that is just terrible.
My girlfriend has dressed in dresses ever since she was a little kid. In high school she would wear girls' shirts under sweatshirts, even though no one could see. She wore heels to college as well. It was just so she felt more comfortable. That was before she knew what being trans was. Now that she's met me, I helped her find out who she is, and I love her for who she is, her mom is like blaming me for "turning her son into someone he's not".
This is literally so messed up, and I feel like someone is using me being gay against my girlfriend for being who she is.
Sorry to rant. This is just horrible and I need some help. :(
I think that is awesome that you are a great support. It is tragic when a family is blaming external factors on a simple principle of self identity. I hope that time will make them more accepting and understanding. Hopefully you and your gf can be strong and support each other while dealing with the typical problems a young couple has :) such as who chooses what to watch on Netflix.
My BF said the other day how he thinks my mom blames him for me doing this, even though she's always nice to him. But she hasn't said anything outright. I wish I could help you more. Really, it's her issue and my advice is "eff her." If she hasn't come around, there's a good chance she never will and the relationship is damaged now. You and your GF should just be happy and ignore her as much as possible, though I know how hard that is.
Thanks to both of you. I'm mainly concerned because my girlfriend isn't being recognized for who she is, and we're both being highly disrespected by her mother.
Quote from: J441 on December 02, 2014, 12:07:26 PM
My girlfriend's mom thinks that her "son" is "becoming a girl" so "he" can date me since I'm a lesbian. She thinks that "he" likes me enough to "become a girl" for me.
Hilarious. Maybe too many romantic comedies watched? When people is in denial even most stupid reasonings would do for them. I think she just needs time, honestly I don't think anybody could be convinced of such idiocy for much time.
Be patient.
Yeah I hope she realizes it's stupid to think that way, but I'm afraid she won't change, just like my mother hasn't changed ever since I came out.