So today I sort of, indirectly, asked my gender therapist (who I've only had two sessions with so far) for a diagnosis. In retrospect I think this is sort of funny because only much later in the conversation did I actually say that I definitely don't identify as cis..
Wondering whether having a diagnosis is important to you guys, why/why not? Not talking about it in terms of a requirement for surgery or whatever, just in general I guess. I feel like I want one for the sake of I guess, believing myself? And also more importantly so I can have something "objective" to tell my parents if/once I decide to come out to them. But I keep feeling like lots of people don't care for a diagnosis except maybe for insurance coverage reasons and the like, or don't want one to begin with, and I'm just curious about people's views on the subject.
Diagnosed isn't that like.. getting tested for something? Not exactly sure about the translation > _ <. But if that is the case then diagnoses are often quite abstract and easy to play with. I mean.. ten years ago or so they diagnosed my IQ was way below average and I would have big troubles living on my own and I proved the opposite with quite the extremes :P. I probably was just being lazy with the therapists at that time but to me it personally made me not believe so much in it.
But maybe I am misunderstanding this whole thing andddd if so, never-mind me, at all :D!
As far as psychology goes I prefer to deal with painful insights than have someone else judge my acts and emotions.
I don't think anyone can diagnose someone else as trans. Basically, if you think you are trans, you pretty much are (unless there is another diagnosis that's keeping you from seeing reality). And if you don't have gender issues, I can't imagine a doctor telling you you might be trans.
Quote from: suzifrommd on December 09, 2014, 04:38:00 PM
I don't think anyone can diagnose someone else as trans. Basically, if you think you are trans, you pretty much are (unless there is another diagnosis that's keeping you from seeing reality). And if you don't have gender issues, I can't imagine a doctor telling you you might be trans.
Totally true. Nonetheless, darkblade, if I understand you correctly, I completely get where you're coming from. Part of my gender journey, so to speak, was a really long phase where I wished for some kind of objective measure of transness. Everything felt overwhelming, too intimate and impossibly crushing, and despite always being the indepedent sort, I wanted to just be told who I am and what to do. Of course, I had to be 'diagnosed' perfectly correctly, or the fantasy was moot, but. I definitely had fantasies of being told I was transgender by some outside force*, and getting a diagnosis of Gender Dysphoria, while somewhat problematic, gave me a rush of relief. It's not just me driving myself 'round the bend for no reason! I'm trans; the doctor said so!
*My funniest and most common trans daydream: A dog would be brought into the dog daycare where I volunteer, and would start barking and growling upon seeing me. ''That's funny,'' the hypothetical, imaginary owner would say, ''He only acts like that around men!''
Quote from: Kirey on December 09, 2014, 04:15:42 PM
Diagnosed isn't that like.. getting tested for something? Not exactly sure about the translation > _ <. But if that is the case then diagnoses are often quite abstract and easy to play with. I mean.. ten years ago or so they diagnosed my IQ was way below average and I would have big troubles living on my own and I proved the opposite with quite the extremes :P. I probably was just being lazy with the therapists at that time but to me it personally made me not believe so much in it.
Early on I asked my psych for a verbal diagnosis, really just to tell me what he thought. It was good to get external feedback, confirmation on my own view. It made me feel good. In my case as well I wanted to get a feel for what the psych was actually thinking - I mean I was there for a reason, and if we didn't agree on what was going on then I wanted to know.
Practically speaking, a diagnosis is useful for HRT and SRS letters, so if you're going down that track you'd want to know that your going to get it, or find another therapist.
Regarding IQ, its only part of the picture. Success in life has many other factors. Some I think are really important are common sense, determination/drive/grit (whatever its called), and how well you can relate to other people (my big failing). They can really take you a long way, with or without IQ. I've seen people with various mixes of these over the years and its amazing what a difference they make.
Quote from: Indoctrinated on December 09, 2014, 04:36:48 PM
As far as psychology goes I prefer to deal with painful insights than have someone else judge my acts and emotions.
In my case I was also pretty seriously depressed. It was obvious why, but speaking freely to someone else really helped. My psych/therapist is absolutely non-judgmental though, to the point where its hard to get any personal opinions from him. I found that both good and bad.
Quote from: suzifrommd on December 09, 2014, 04:38:00 PM
I don't think anyone can diagnose someone else as trans. Basically, if you think you are trans, you pretty much are (unless there is another diagnosis that's keeping you from seeing reality). And if you don't have gender issues, I can't imagine a doctor telling you you might be trans.
Beg to disagree darling... A diagnosis of GID is given, by a trained psychiatrist or clinical psychologist, following accepted standard medical protocols (WPATH)
Quote from: captains on December 09, 2014, 05:03:22 PM
Totally true. Nonetheless, darkblade, if I understand you correctly, I completely get where you're coming from. Part of my gender journey, so to speak, was a really long phase where I wished for some kind of objective measure of transness. Everything felt overwhelming, too intimate and impossibly crushing, and despite always being the indepedent sort, I wanted to just be told who I am and what to do. Of course, I had to be 'diagnosed' perfectly correctly, or the fantasy was moot, but. I definitely had fantasies of being told I was transgender by some outside force*, and getting a diagnosis of Gender Dysphoria, while somewhat problematic, gave me a rush of relief. It's not just me driving myself 'round the bend for no reason! I'm trans; the doctor said so!
This is exactly how I feel. It's not that I want someone to stick a label on me that I don't feel is right, it's just that for the sake of my sanity I want something that sort of says "yes you do have a problem, and no you're no insane, but now you can go ahead and fix it." Not that I'm saying its a problem to be trans but, you know what I mean. I probably do meet the criteria but I just wonder sometimes whether my dysphoria (which seems much less than that of others) actually counts as dysphoria or whether I'm only exaggerating normal thoughts. I want one so I can believe myself basically, I'm a science minded person and sometimes I just wish there was something objective that can give you a solid answer.
Yep, I agree with wanting a diagnosis just to settle my mind as to whether I'm just nuts or not. I mean I know I'm not, but part of me wishes I was nuts, lol. It may be the easier route :D
As for IQ, apparently I have a high one, but I've still managed to f**k up most things in my life!
Quote from: darkblade on December 10, 2014, 11:07:51 AM
I probably do meet the criteria but I just wonder sometimes whether my dysphoria (which seems much less than that of others) actually counts as dysphoria or whether I'm only exaggerating normal thoughts. I want one so I can believe myself basically, I'm a science minded person and sometimes I just wish there was something objective that can give you a solid answer.
I felt much the same, and what really helped was to consider that there's a spectrum of being transgender. I'm definitely on it somewhere, but not so much as some people. The thoughts I have are obviously not normal, but I don't recall anything from when I was 4 years old. So yes, there's no question I'm transgender. The only question is where on the spectrum, and that doesn't matter all that much.