Since I have started HRT, I thought it was time to tell family. I am single, have kids, have sisters and only one parent left. Grand parents all have passed a long time ago and my dad a few years back. My mother lives close and I spend a lot of time with her. She was my biggest hurdle. I have been in therapy for years now and I haven't been getting anywhere because I have been waiting for the 'right moment'. Well girls, that right moment is NEVER going to come. You just have to pick the best one and go with it and that is what I did. I cooked dinner for mom and I and after dinner, did some bill paying on her computer and she went and sat in her recliner. When I finished, I went back to the dining table and told mom to come over to the table, that we needed to talk. I was shaking and about to cry. She came over, sat down and said, "Okay, talk." Oh hell did that put me on the spot. There was an awkward pause and I guess I just yelled it out. "I'M GAY." Mom looked at me and laughed and I said, "No. Seriously Mom... I am gay." and she replied "So?" WHAT THE HELL?!?! SO? I have been struggling all my life with this and she said "so". At that point she said she didn't care. I was her son and that she loved me from the day I was born and always will love me. She said she didn't have ANY idea, but now that I had said it, she said she can see it now. We talked for a very long time. There were tears on my part and hugs, lots of hugs. We discussed the kids and she thinks it is best that I don't say anything until my son is out of college and my daughter doesn't need to know until she is older AND that is if I meet someone and they are going to be around. My sisters? We are NOT close. I am in a different 'class' financially than they married into, so they look down on Mom and I. I don't care if they ever know or not. It really doesn't make me any difference. Then the talk went to friends. I told Mom that I was NOT coming out to anyone. If they figure it out, good for them. If they don't, oh well. If it bothers them, I lose them. I am no longer going to lose sleep over MY sexuality.
Now. I have left out a HUGE part of my life with her. My HRT. I did this on purpose. I am going to get established and get things moving (already started a month ago) and see how things go. I really didn't want to go from "Hey Mom, I am gay and oh yeah, by the way, I am becoming a woman." right off of the bat. So I decided to ease into the whole HRT thing with everyone. I am going to tell Mom after the new year since we are scheduled to go on a vacation and I am going to have to take my injections with me. I think after a few months of her getting used to the 'new' me and absorbing the whole thing, she will be more understanding.
I hope this helps someone. I know reading some of the posts on here have helped me tremendously and if those people didn't have the courage to tell their stories, I may not have ever told my Mom and started my journey.
Mom is adjusting well. Much better than I have ever imagined. She has told me that she isn't going to tip-toe around my sexuality and that IF she says something that offends me to just deal with it like I have all along. I am ok with that. She has opened up to me about things. She and I have talked about my dating situation (none!) and if I was holding back because I was trying to hide it from others or just not wanting to. I told her a little bit of both. I do have a date with a guy that I have been talking to (who I met through a mutual friend) on New Years if the weather isn't bad here. I tried to cover up the 'date' with 'going out with friends' and Mom, out of the blue, tells me to make sure he wears a condom... <smh> Great advice, just not used to getting it from my mom about the guy I am going out with. I guess she figured out what my preferences are... lol
Things have completely smoothed out and it is wonderful. We are getting along great and no issues at all. I am such a lucky girl. Mom was right, she is NOT tip-toeing around 'Gay' topics. She still has her opinions and so do I. We disagree about certain things and it is fine. We agree to disagree. She is coming around to me dieting and not trying to sabotage me! She is still buying cookies and cakes, but she isn't taunting me with them anymore!!! (EVIL!!) I came out to my gay cousin a while back and I told him about telling mom and he was so happy for me. It was emotional, the little jerk made me cry. He told me the story about him coming out to his mom and it was a lot like mine. She knew and so did his dad, and they accepted him from the start. Makes me wonder about my decision not to tell my dad... Speaking of emotions. OMG! I am a cry/happy machine now. I can watch a commercial about auto insurance and cry! No wonder GG's are crazy! This hormone thing is a wild ride! Well that is it for this update. I just gave myself injection #10 and I am going to get ready for bed and watch some Ancient Aliens or Family Guy (can't make up my mind!) Night girls and guys! Peace and happiness!
Life is good.
Day at a time and having support is truly a plus in overall happiness.