Well... it was nice while it lasted, all the intense romantic feelings, but today he pack up his belongings (at work). If I see him again it will be tomorrow but after that no more most likely unless he invites me out as a friend... which will not happen because we both have feelings for each other and he has a wife. I know he was the first ideal mate for me and nothing has ever came close to him in my life. It wasnt just his physical attributes although they were ideal for me (because hes not going to attractive pass much pass 30). I probably met him at the end the of his peak.
He sang Heaven is a Place on Earth... under his breath when working with me today. He then smiled a lot to me... but he never talk to me one on one or ask me out.
Today... it felt like the first moments I ever saw him.... I love him. I know he felt something too... But I dont think it was love. I think he saw his wife in me, and for the time being I was a temporary wife from home. A guy once told me this is how he felt.about me... i think it fits him too.
....
But I feel he was my soul mate... that could never be. I know we.can never be.together... and I dont know if I will ever.find love again. I didnt kiss him...but hes the only guy I truely loved. Hmmm... at least I know what to look for.
At the party I could had flirted with him but I choose not too.... because he has a wife. I didnt want to make myself a fool again....
I've been following your love story. I have to be honest, you should definitely talk to a therapist, or a professional. I have no doubt you're beautiful, from your descriptions. However, being so obsessed with a *married* man is not only morally wrong, but completely destructive to your self worth. I totally urge you to seek professional help.
Going after a married man is simply wrong and inviting trouble that women like us just don't need. We have enough problems already. I hope you don't get mad, but to me, it sounds more like infatuation, anyway. I think there's someone out there for you.
There are others out there, and some of them aren't married...the fact that your "ideal man" would even consider cheating on his wife says that if you did win him over, he would cheat on you, too.
I don't believe in the romantic idea that there is "one and only one" soul-mate...what if s/he were to die before meeting? That'd be a heck of a bummer, and you wouldn't even know it.
Keep looking, you will find a worthy partner.
Quote from: Miranda Catherine on December 23, 2014, 02:28:36 PM
Going after a married man is simply wrong and inviting trouble that women like us just don't need. We have enough problems already. I hope you don't get mad, but to me, it sounds more like infatuation, anyway. I think there's someone out there for you.
If I had more time with him... yes he would cheat. But I only had 2 months with him... so to feel all this is bizarre but I gave him the cold should pass mid Dec because I had to force myself on realizing its all tragic. I feel he did love me at some point... but he has a wife and he couldnt go beyond. Its like diminishing returns.. but I think hes truely bisexual... but he is into women, like Im the rare exception.
If I was transistion... Ill be his ideal... because if he could love me as a man he would know Im the one as a female. But in the process.... I forgotten I was someone too.... I forgot who I am... my values... because by allowing him become my love fixation I became just a soul searching for him.... and thats unhealthy. I went on 3 dates ... searching for a boyfriend... but none work. I can get a guy... Im not beautiful... I am just cute but my personality makes me special.
But he fail me... and left me out in the cold... since even though hes leaving for good.... its like hes giving all his things to people he doesnt care about.
Im at work.... and this guy in front of me is buying me pizza and given me chocolate... more than my crush ever given me.....
This will be the last time I will ever love someone who doesnt tell me he loves me first.... I learnt a lot about love through this whole experience..... and I will never love a married man again. I know how Scatlett OHara feels.
Actually Ill probably never love untill a guy gives me a ring... and then Ill consider him. Objective view of emotions.
Yeah... I need some help but at least its over now. Cold shoulder till he leaves.
The reason why I love him so fast was because he wanted to protect me... I think he somehow felt like he had authority over me. Its bizarre. IF he was 5'8, or if I was 5'11.. it wouldnt happen. If I didnt look young (to him) ... it wouldnt happen.
He was like a Robert Pattison to me... Edward Cullen (but didnt look like that). He wanted to protect me and I allow him too. He cared about me... and he patronize me just a little but its okay since he meant well. He told me I look good twice... he always seem concern for me. Yet... I became colder so he wouldnt know I was into him...
Is this normal straight guy behavior or was I just in delusion?
To be honest... like 1 out of 10 guys become just a little protective over me. But he was full blown mesmerize at one point.
Quote from: Wild Flower on December 24, 2014, 09:35:11 AMIs this normal straight guy behavior . . .
I don't think it's
normal behavior for anybody to be honest. Getting involved with someone else to that degree (or any degree above friendship, really) is a bad idea if that person is married, or if you yourself are married. If I was single, I wouldn't touch a married guy if my life depended on it; not just for my own sense of self worth (because as Beth Andrea pointed out, if he's cheating on his wife, he'll cheat on you), but out of respect for his poor spouse who may end up having to suffer through the indignity of marriage to an adulterer in addition to their eventual divorce that I'll be an integral part of. I don't want anything to do with helping cause that kind of emotional suffering on a blameless party.
Sorry to be old Brenda the prude once again.
....
Yep. You guys were all right.
He didnt send me a text for Xmas... which I expect him too if he wanted one date at least... but he didnt. To me... that shows he just doesnt care about me besides a coworker.
I was a fool. I was stupid. Maybe the most stupidest "time period" of my life. If he .... even tries now... Im going to hurt his feelings. Im so cold.
I couldnt possibly send a text to him.... no.... no.
I am no longer going to question anything he does because I turn cold as a freezer.
My last time ever in romancing married men. Unless he divorces her for me... I want nothing from him.
.....
On the plus side, a guy I have a strange relationship sent me a text wishing me a happy xmas. I guess I know who wants my heart. ... although this guy is just a friend and boyfriend when needed deal.
Like ewwww.... he saw me in public... ask me if I ate, and I said yeah... and then he was like, "Bye". Like total rejection to me... like he was annoyed. He was asking me out to dinner. I screw my last night with him but I guess I shouldnt care...
Was I a fool? It was my last chance to see him 1 on 1. But I guess if he really wanted he would ask me out on a official date. Not a by chance encounter. Im so upset with myself... because I secretly prayed all weekend this would happen. Like passionately prayed. Black candles voodoo... okay no not exactly but still
He didnt look at me when he said bye... and he was serious. Makes me wonder what he was thinking...
You need to move on GF!!! I've dated married men before. The sex was good, very good but they are married, they have another woman in their life. At best you can get some good hot sex but they always watch their watch it seemed to me. It was so upsetting to just be used as a place to unload their stuff then hurry home.
Quote from: FrancisAnn on December 28, 2014, 04:57:46 AM
You need to move on GF!!! I've dated married men before. The sex was good, very good but they are married, they have another woman in their life. At best you can get some good hot sex but they always watch their watch it seemed to me. It was so upsetting to just be used as a place to unload their stuff then hurry home.
No. Its not even close to that.... its like star crossed lovers
But really..
Taylor Swift song Blank Space covers this relationship to the T.
I screwed up. Lol. He was asking me out on a dinner date... ehhhhh.... pukes. Tomorrow Ill do the ultimate flirt he will ever see in me... tomorrow Ill make him mine before News Years hit. If i dont.... itll be too late.... and theres no going ba k. I dont even want him... I just want him to tell me likes me. Tomorrow, Ill win him back.
Go do whatever then, sad.
Quote from: FrancisAnn on December 28, 2014, 05:15:48 AM
Go do whatever then, sad.
Im kidding... i was being dramatic like Scarlet OHara. No im over him.
Hes so confusing.... like asking me out to dinner at 6 pm and then getting pissy with me because i said i already ate....
I just want to know if he likes me... that is all. So if he does like me... we can be friends.... because Im over him as a potential lover... but it doesnt mean i am going to burn a bridge to be his friend.
You need to stop. He's married, and honestly I went over all your stories, and I'm sure he's just respectful, and likes you as a friend. Most importantly though, what the heck did his innocent wife do to deserve that you try and take away her husband?? How would you feel if you were in her place? I'm sorry, but you say you feel like a female, but you have no consideration for other females. Please please I beg you speak to a doctor about your thoughts and feelings.