Hello, I have a few questions about the inner machinations of the minds of transsexual women.
Will estrogen ever make me think like a girl?
It's a question that I want to know before I start taking estrogen. Here are some more questions... Will it change my personality, for the better? Will I develop female interests like shopping etc?
All these things would be perfect.
I really want to be a girl inside and out and hopefully estrogen will help me achieve what I want to achieve.
Thanks!
"The inner machinations of my mind are an enigma" Patrick Star
Quote from: Maribeth12 on January 07, 2015, 09:39:00 PM
Hello, I have a few questions about the inner machinations of the minds of transsexual women.
Will estrogen ever make me think like a girl?
It's a question that I want to know before I start taking estrogen. Here are some more questions... Will it change my personality, for the better? Will I develop female interests like shopping etc?
All these things would be perfect.
I really want to be a girl inside and out and hopefully estrogen will help me achieve what I want to achieve.
Thanks!
"The inner machinations of my mind are an enigma" Patrick Star
Interesting question, I feel like I've always thought like a girl, I'm pre hrt myself though I don't imagine estrogen will make you want to go shopping. I assume it would be nor of a mood ordeal maybe it will calm you down from all the testosterone (poison) in the body allowing clear focus finally... I can't wait to see what the women on here have to say
Hi Maribeth,
A lot will depend on your brain structure. In a recent paper delivered at the recent WPATH conference, some Dutch Neuroscientist in Holland have proven the theory of the male and female brain.
Having said that; what you may well find, once you start HT, depending on the format, dosage etc, that you will start to feed atrophied Estrogen receptors in your brain gat may start a "wake-up" process in your brain to respond to more feminine aspects of your environment. The more you accept this neural transition the more you will change.
Huggs
Catherine
I've been on HRT since 31 August and there have been changes in my thought processes and things I fancy. A few examples:
- I have a very hard time relating to my gaming group these days as eight out of the 11 are male. There are times I feel as if they're talking in another language and I cannot follow the conversation or understand the allure it has.
- A corollary to that is I find the combined odour of the males in the group to be offensive.
- This Christmas I was filled with the desire to send out Christmas cards. I have HATED sending out cards since I was a child but this year I simply had to so I went to Wal Mart at a silly hour, bought an address book and box of cards, and started messaging everyone I wanted to send a card to. So some 18 people got a card from me for the first time ever.
- I find myself enjoying the little touches women are more inclined to make, hugs hello and goodbye and do so myself with certain people. This comes after years of really not liking to be touched.
- After years of being pretty much asexual and not really attracted to anyone, I find myself utterly captivated by Tom Mison, the actor who plays Ichabod Crane in Sleepy Hollow. There was a scene where he was sitting on the ground with his hair around his shoulders and I said to myself, "Good god, that man is gorgeous and that Surrey accent is like silk to my ears. I think the issue of my sexual orientation is getting settled.
So there you have it - a few examples of what HRT has done for me.
HrT has affected my mind in a few ways. For instance I use to be Bi but when I started HrT I lost complete interest in woman and now I only think about men. Also I have become way more emotional and care about other peoples feelings more. So estrogen indeed will most likely change yours too.
I'm not sure that HRT is responsible, only that there are changes. For myself, I suspect that we always thought in a feminine way, but denied it, acting out a stereotyped male role to a lesser or greater degree.
HRT didn't change me or my interests at all. I thought they did at first, but it turned out to more be a simple rejection of activities that would lean me towards a masculine side. Once I was accepted as female and nothing but female in society, all of my interests returned.
I am a little bit more intolerant of things that bug me now, there is a little less filter for when I will say something that someone doesn't want to hear. That could also be a part of getting older, but it could also be an emotional effect I suppose.
I don't think it's anything to worry about, that is for sure. You should feel like you and nothing but you for the rest of your life. Chances are you will see some significant shifts in activities, interests, interactions with others, you name it really. If you start HRT and you feel crazy then something is definitely not right. HRT is given to us as medication to feel better mentally.. that is the whole point ;)
Quote from: Jennygirl on January 07, 2015, 11:14:56 PM
HRT didn't change me or my interests at all. I thought they did at first, but it turned out to more be a simple rejection of activities that would lean me towards a masculine side. Once I was accepted as female and nothing but female in society, all of my interests returned.
I am a little bit more intolerant of things that bug me now, there is a little less filter for when I will say something that someone doesn't want to hear. That could also be a part of getting older, but it could also be an emotional effect I suppose.
I don't think it's anything to worry about, that is for sure. You should feel like you and nothing but you for the rest of your life. Chances are you will see some significant shifts in activities, interests, interactions with others, you name it really. If you start HRT and you feel crazy then something is definitely not right. HRT is given to us as medication to feel better mentally.. that is the whole point ;)
A thousand times this! It's certainly helped to tone down my depression and dysphoria.
What happened with me is that being on HRT has allowed me to accept and be myself much more than I did when I simply accepted myself as trans but was pre-transition. Now where I am at mid-transition having come out to all my family and being able to act and be myself, tearing down the walls I built around myself I am more able to be me. I had been running self censorship for almost 20 years before I got to this point. I have always wanted to do and admit liking things but I didn't let myself, now I can. To someone not inside my head they might think these things are all new, when the truth is, this is how I have always been.
For me I feel like my whole thought process has changed to the extent I have difficulty remembering how I used to think a year ago. Its also been noticed by people around me. I get scared when I'm alone in places now when I never used to, I do indeed love shopping for clothes, shoes, makeup etc. when before I just tossed on jeans and a tee/hoodie. I've also noticed I interact differently with my son recently, I've been acting a lot more motherly then fatherly. This is just my experience its always said around here YMMV. For all I know some of this could be coupled on to me also having borderline personality disorder.
Not all women like shopping or other activities that might be considered girly. A lot of men like shopping and activities that might be considered girly. Hormones aren't the core reason for behaviour. There is probably nothing that is specifically thinking like a girl or thinking like a boy.
What the HRT does though is give you permission to be yourself. I loathed clothes/shoe shopping before HRT - and now I love it. But it wasn't the HRT that caused that it was the fact I'm shopping for stuff that I love to buy and I want to wear...which definitely wasn't the case when I was shopping as a man. Likewise I enjoy taking a bit of extra time to look nice and dress nice before I go out the door whereas before I couldn't give a stuff - again, it was nothing to do with the HRT just that I was finally able to feel I looked like the person I was.
So don't expect HRT and transition to change your thinking but it sure may change your behaviour as you become free. :)
FYI: I'm IS.
For me, nothing changed. Everything I ever was interested in, I still am. I still think and act the same.
Of course, I've been on hormones my whole life.
I think it changed how my mind works, yeah. Or at least transition, on the whole, did. There is a confluence of change going on there all at once and it's hard to parse the cause of any one thing.
But I do believe my mind has changed, mainly just cuz when I read old things I have written I don't recognize that person, and the thought processes going on in the writing seem so foreign. It actually makes me feel very uncomfortable cognitive dissonance to do that so I avoid it at all costs.
I had a lot of interests change, some stayed the same. It's all a part of my evolution, which every person, cis or trans, evolves over time. I embrace the things that stayed the same cuz those things that survived the gauntlet must be genuinely me. Why did I transition other than to be genuinely me?
The new things? Well there may be lots of reasons why I might find new interests given how much my life has changed. No clue if hrt played any role. I find female led music resonates more with me than before, but I am fairly certain that is due to life change and not because of hrt. I get female struggle now, so much more than before I lived it. I also get female triumph and how that feels. Um...I always loved shopping, so that isn't a new thing. Idk...
I wouldn't hope for certain changes. i would just try to become the best version of yourself you can be. For trans people, transition is usually going to be a part of getting there. Once you have transitioned you find out just what kind of woman you are. Some women have a masculine bent, and it doesn't make them men.
It definitely has an impact on how you think. I'm told that if you are not really transgender then these changes will cause a lot of stress and freak you the heck out.
For my part it's been fantastic and I'll never not be on them.
I am a much happier person, more emotional, have a lot more in common with other women and have increased disgust with typical male behavior. My emotions are not too extreme. I sometimes want to cry about things, but normally don't. I am afraid now and I wasn't really before. The fear is more akin to the standard female worry about things you can't do anything about.
The other real odd thing is I have a conscience again. When I was a kid my father used to guilt trip me like crazy. I prided myself that as I got older that I killed my conscience so that others could not make me feel guilty. I was moral, but couldn't be guilt tripped. Yea... that's gone. I think it must have been due to T somehow rather than any act of will.
My greatest gain though is that I am now happy. I really am.
I think the now enjoy shopping thing is that now it doesn't make me upset to go out shopping because now I can get stuff for me too! Yea!
Not everything changes though. I still will tell puns (I'm so ashamed). I still like girls. (My wife calls me lesbo with a smile and I love hearing that) I can tell that a guy is attractive, but I still don't want them.
I used to think that I thought like a girl but I now realize I didn't. Not really. I thought like a guy that wanted to be a girl. There is a difference. I can't quite describe it but it's pretty big really. Now that I can see it I would say that even now that while I am a lot closer, I still have more mental changes to come.
Best of luck sweetie. Please make sure you do it all right. Get a doc. Check your blood. Don't smoke. Watch your weight. and of course assuming you really are trans, enjoy the ride. :-)
I'm still not sure what it means to think like a girl.
I figure in ways I was already. Pre-transition, other guys seemed to pick that I wasn't quite like them, and excluded me from man-talk. By contrast, girls felt relaxed around me, and I found myself trusted and included in girl-talk.
---
I would say that HRT has liberated the way I feel and express myself, but it hasn't made those changes in itself. I have come to the surface over time, because I now feel able to do so.
My experience before vs into transition were a bit like a submarine.
Before I presented as a periscope escaping the waves. I kinda lived and navigated the world through a very select lens.
Now I'm a fully exposed vessel, laying bare for all the world to see that I am *indeed* a submarine :~)
I feel like I'm in a weird situation emotionally. I know I either do not fit in with men or feel like I am acting when I do "fit in." I think I know how I should feel and how should think and feel as a woman, and its kind of difficult for me to put into words. I wish I could be more emotionally expressive, be more social (in a feminine way), laugh more, and smile more like many other women do, but its hard to laugh and smile when feeling dysphoric and depressed and difficult to be more emotionally expressive and social when you have been somewhat reserved, quiet, and shy for most of your life. I am pre-HRT and I am really really hoping that it actually helps mentally and emotionally.
An interesting thing is that I think a lot of people at work can somehow sense that I'm not "one the guys", but I have to dress like one, haven't gone through voice training yet, haven't gone through laser/electrolysis yet, and don't wear makeup yet, and haven't taken a single dose of spiro and E.
I don't think it's productive to be fixated on "thinking like a girl". That just tends to encompass societal and cultural stereotypes which provides only a limited perspective on gender identity and transition. I've often seen people mid-transition become almost obsessed with the differences between "male behaviour" and "female behaviour", but most of the time, this isn't really about authenticity (which is what I think the whole point of transition is), and more about a limited cultural lens of what is labelled as masculine and feminine.
Think of yourself as an authentic person, first and foremost, and build your identity from there. While your body will certainly start transforming from male to female with hormones, the mind doesn't necessarily work that way. I used to also worry a lot about whether I "felt like a girl" or not, but 8 years on, I don't "feel male" or "feel female", I just feel like me, and that's it - and from what I know from cis people's experience, most of them do not "feel male" or "female" but see their sex as something merely incidental, like having blue eyes or black skin (which is probably why they find the trans experience so hard to understand, without education!)
Interesting question....
No definitely HRT has not made me think like a girl, however because I am becoming more womanly (HRT has helped me no end there) I have started to think, shop and behave more womanly... in fact I have become so much more emotional than before.... blub at sad and so happy things.
In my pretend world (as a man) I was always a bit of a loner, never really got into the manly thing, like drinking sessions after work, sexual discussions, especially over last 10 years.... it felt a) awkward and b) very chauvinistic and sexist... I have always got on far better with women than men, striking long term friendships; also was a bit of "dear diary" to them too....
So have I changed yes more focal, did HRT do it, No it just liberated me :angel:
L Katy :-*
I don't feel my HRT has really changed anything for me in terms of thinking like a female would, I have always been more feminine then male.
Like katrinaw I have never really been into too manly things, so honestly I feel it has changed very little upstairs for me.
Estrogen did not make me think like a girl.
Living as a female made me think like a girl. I started liking shopping, for example, when I started presenting as a female and saw how much fun it could be to put together a look.
Quote from: Ms Grace on January 07, 2015, 11:39:26 PM
permission to be yourself
For me it was this - I didn't even know I needed permission, but once HRT released the GD I had been suffering from for all of my life and after I began transitioning I was free to be the authentic me, and I discovered that I had been suppressing an extremely feminine personality for all of those years. As an example - it is now perfectly acceptable to hug people, or cry, or express empathy - whereas before... well...... boys don't cry, right? I had to keep any expression that wasn't 100% male under rigid control, and I did. Society did not give me permission to express the real me.
And as others have mentioned there are some activities I used to enjoy that I don't really enjoy anymore, and in the meantime I have started doing new activities that I never thought i'd like but I do. I was expected as a man to enjoy those old "guy" activities and I forced myself to into them and I got a measure of satisfaction from doing them, but looking back now I can't say that I really enjoyed them that much. Society's expectations of me kept me locked into doing traditional male activities.
So, my girl thinking and my girl behavior was there all along, it was just suppressed by society expecting me to act like a guy.
Being on E changes a lot of things for your body, which in turn changes how you 'think' about things. For example, when your breasts start to develop and are hyper sensitive, you don't want to be as rough with your body as you did before. You hold yourself a bit away from things, you don't rough house, you move more carefully, you hold the steering wheel at 4 and 8 instead of 10 and 2. Little things like finding an outfit you look good in making you want to avoid doing things that might ruin your clothes.
Another change E brings is emotional. You may tend to be more teary, quicker to feel emotionally connected to something/one, or to react with some emotion rather than anger. Imagine that puberty made the boy reactions come out. More likely to get angry, lash out, be aggressive, now puberty with estrogen makes those same events cause the girl reactions to come forth instead.
In short, being on E causes you to react like a girl. Those reactions start a domino effect that transforms you a little at a time. You won't 'get bad at math' change your politics, want a pony, or do anything radical like that just from E, it may happen, but it will be from the effects of how you react to every day life giving you a new perspective, rather than re-wiring your brain.
There is some re-wiring going on though, so don't discount that you may change your likes to spicy food or stop liking the smell of certain things, etc.
No hormones yet for me (but soon I hope!!), but since "coming out" to myself, I have found myself thinking about things differently. Like others have mentioned, I'm recognizing a lot of behaviors and interests that I've been suppressing without even being aware of it. I find it pretty amazing what a simple change in attitude can do, so I can easily believe that HRT will ave an impact.
However, I don't like to think of it as "thinking like a girl," more like "thinking honestly like myself." Girls, boys, and everyone thinks a little differently, and the sooner society can accept that, the better!
I am not sure exactly what has changed but there have been changes for sure.
However, I've had a womanly way of thinking for a long time and I could never really truly relate to a lot of guys. The only guys I really relate to are because of shared interests and hobbies. But I could never discuss sports or women, especially women.
I have been taking hormones for about 15 years now and all I can say is that estrogen makes me feel like a normal person, if there is such a thing. I don't feel weird, just normal and chemically balanced. If that makes any sense.
I started changing the moment I accepted my status as a transgender girl. I started wanting certain things which led to others. For example painting my toe nails opened the door to my interest in shoes.
I've only been on HRT for a little over a month and nothing seems different mentally. I was under the impression I would notice a change in the first week. That hasn't happened. I know it still could, but I'm a little disappointed. I was told that I could end up with more patience and less internal conflict. I was really hoping for those changes to happen. I'm still hoping my HRT is low dose and that upping the dose will change that or it will change anyway in the near future.
I think HRT does change your thinking, but maybe only a little. It is really hard to say because being on HRT and starting to be yourself happens close to each other. At least for me. Was any change due to being on HRT or was it just being myself? I really think it was a combination. It did not change my major interests. The things I liked to do before I still like, but I did pick up new interests. I did find that being on HRT changed how people interacted with me, and that in turn did change how I act, and that is a definite influence on how I think know.
Quote from: Zumbagirl on January 08, 2015, 12:51:53 PM
I have been taking hormones for about 15 years now and all I can say is that estrogen makes me feel like a normal person, if there is such a thing. I don't feel weird, just normal and chemically balanced. If that makes any sense.
This is similar to how I feel. Like before, I was the person I was I think because I was out of balance, being pulled by society in directions that made me uncomfortable, and my mind at odds with itself from trying to work with the wrong chemicals, so i whirled and thrashed and just generally did a bad job of living a life. Now it feels balanced everything goes smooth. Things seem right. That has made me different. It has made the whole world seem different.
The sturm und drang in my mind has calmed but hasn't gone away. HRT has helped there though I was kind of hoping for more.
I think for me it was combination of the hormones and me being confident to be myself.
as a guy.. i was shy and withdrawn... and hated making an effort to look good..
I accepted who i was...a girl.... and things changed... now i am outgoing.. life of the party.. confident... I love making myself pretty.. especially for my boyfriend.... i love shopping especially for shoes.. i am a typical girly girl... when i started hormones i became more emotional and i do cry more easy.. so yes... i think my personality has done a 180.
I think the hormones gave me even more confidence
Quote from: Maribeth12 on January 07, 2015, 09:39:00 PM
Hello, I have a few questions about the inner machinations of the minds of transsexual women.
Will estrogen ever make me think like a girl?
It's a question that I want to know before I start taking estrogen. Here are some more questions... Will it change my personality, for the better? Will I develop female interests like shopping etc?
All these things would be perfect.
I really want to be a girl inside and out and hopefully estrogen will help me achieve what I want to achieve.
Thanks!
"The inner machinations of my mind are an enigma" Patrick Star
From what I understand about the medical basis for transexuality, whether or not you 'think like a girl', whatever that means, would depend on the degree of sexual dimorphism in a given subject's brain; that is to say, the human brain exhibits a small but ultimately significant degree of sexual dimorphism (or rather, there are indeed 'male' and 'female' brain structure types). The prevailing explanation as to why some people's brains would exhibit cross-sex brain differentiation being hormonal imbalances in utero, where brain differentiation is determined by chemical rather than genetic factors.
Thus, as a transsexual woman, you by default necessarily "think like a woman" regardless if your interests/hobbies.
I say this as an androphilic, sappy-movie-loving "primary" that listens to metal/industrial and hates shopping.
Everyone is all over the place, male (cis or trans) and female (ditto). Just be YOU my friend! You're as much a woman as any other :)
I wonder if there is a trend between younger and older transitioners? I transitioned in my teens and therefore never really attempted to be a man, and so didn't experience such a profound "switchover". Many older transitioners often report how they became much more what they perceived as feminine, emotional etc, and often assigning behaviours as "male" or "female" behaviours. For me, I assign fewer behaviours as gender-based, and while I was more able to express my complete self, it wasn't the clothes, makeup, shopping or other so called "female" behaviours that were the reason for my transition.
For a while, I embraced being a male who had these so called "female" behaviours, as I was deemed too young to make such a life changing decision, and at that time, I thought that maybe they were right, and that I might not be trans, but just "think" I am. However, I realised that I should have trusted my instinct all along, and it was simply something inside of me, telling me that I was female, that was the reason for transition. Nothing about not being "one of the lads" or anything like this - there are many men (and women) who exhibit behaviours and personalities atypical of their gender. They may even "think like the opposite gender" due to how societal norms impose a limited perspective on gendered behaviour. However, this does not make them trans. It may differ for others, but for me, the one thing that makes me trans is my mind telling me I'm female, nothing else. I actually fit in quite well into the heteronormative world as a feminine female, but this is merely incidental to me, I do not consciously feel like I'm "thinking like a girl".
Quote from: Zumbagirl on January 08, 2015, 12:51:53 PM
I have been taking hormones for about 15 years now and all I can say is that estrogen makes me feel like a normal person, if there is such a thing. I don't feel weird, just normal and chemically balanced. If that makes any sense.
With you there Zumbagirl... I have been in excess of 10.. lost count.... normality being your "real self"
L Katy :-*
Hello Maribeth
A substantial part of the "HRT effect" will purely be due to you knowing that you are on it. It kind of gives you "permission" to move forward and to begin acting and thinking more like a girl. For some people HRT is a miracle, but for many of us it's more of a helping hand.
In my case it subtly changed the way I think, my emotions, and the way I perceive the world. More empathetic, a little more emotional.
When people ask me, I say that the girl exists mostly between your ears, but that you may need to work hard to discover her and let her free. So please don't think that HRT will be like taking a magic pill - it's frequently not like that. Unless you've spent your whole life being told that you're a girly boy, you'll probably need to do some work to expose the woman in you. This is both exposing the woman to yourself, and exposing her to the outside world. It's an interesting process.
Hope this helps!
Julia
Quote from: Julia-Madrid on January 09, 2015, 07:33:49 AM
Hello Maribeth
A substantial part of the "HRT effect" will purely be due to you knowing that you are on it. It kind of gives you "permission" to move forward and to begin acting and thinking more like a girl. For some people HRT is a miracle, but for many of us it's more of a helping hand.
In my case it subtly changed the way I think, my emotions, and the way I perceive the world. More empathetic, a little more emotional.
When people ask me, I say that the girl exists mostly between your ears, but that you may need to work hard to discover her and let her free. So please don't think that HRT will be like taking a magic pill - it's frequently not like that. Unless you've spent your whole life being told that you're a girly boy, you'll probably need to do some work to expose the woman in you. This is both exposing the woman to yourself, and exposing her to the outside world. It's an interesting process.
Hope this helps!
Julia
That was pretty much me pre-transition, which was why I didn't really have to invest much time in setting myself free in the sense of 'acting more like a girl'. The only sorts of things I had to think about were more physical, that I hadn't experienced - make up/fashion/hair etc.
However, there was a sense of 'unlocking' and 'transition' within my psyche to finally understand and perceive myself completely as female - I knew it before, but it had been distorted and blocked by being told I was male. It took a while for me to make that psychological transition whereby my female essence flourished within myself. But what is not always clear is that I differentiated this from how I "acted". The way I "acted" hardly changed at all, it was a largely internal process, and the only difference in relation to other people was that I gained more confidence and hence improved my interactions with people in that way.
I think it really depends on the person but most people start showing signs of acting more feminine or female after starting hormones but I do wonder how much of that is just the idea that you've taken a step towards fully transitioning that sort of frees otherwise blocked mentalities. I don't think hrt made me enjoy painting my nails but it was something I never thought about until afterwards =P its an interesting ride all the same. I hope you enjoy it.
There have been a lot of comments that really hit me hard in here.
I feel the same way. I just don't act very femininely, I don't feel like a woman, and I have very little understanding of what girls like to do. I try to look to my sister for inspiration, but all she does is shop for bras and watches a lot of that reality TV about girls getting pregnant and stuff. I know I'm still very early on my life and haven't done much yet for the transition, but It makes me think more about this. Right now I act very manly. I burp out loud, release gas, watch sports, fish, and go to theme parks a lot. I really do want to feel more womanly by shopping but even that scares me. A lot of you basically said that taking hrt gives you confidence and makes you feel comfortable with you. I certainly hope so.
I wanna find ways to start acting more feminine now so I can some practice for the future. Maybe i'll make my own thread on that.
I hope you can ways to help better yourself just like the rest of us have. Good luck with becoming more female.
lol Sammi :D
I was hanging out with my sister and her best friend the other day. They told me some of the least ladylike stories you can imagine.
Well, since it's rather impossible to compare your own thinking with that of a cis female's I'd imagine it would be difficult to tell if your mind is "switching over". My opinion is that there's really not that big of an intangible difference between male and female brains except how they are influenced by hormones, upbringing and environment.
Let's say a man and a woman are sitting together watching The Fountain. The man's emotional reciprocity might be more limited than the woman's due to far less influence by oestrogen, therefore less likely to well up over a sad scene; but would each one's ability to appreciate a fine art film have the same degree of difference? I don't believe so.
We can base statistics on stereotypes and say that men and women think very differently, but I think we would all be very surprised at how these differences have very little to do with brain functionality.
From childhood to adulthood I've never once identified with typical male interests, nor did I ever have much of a libido; but I never really identified with typical female interests, either. I was simply seen as effeminate, sweet, sensitive, and even prudish. Of course, I later realise the truth of myself, so based on that you could say I was "thinking like a female". Since that is essentially true, HRT wouldn't really do anything to me mentally except loosen things up more and allow me to explore my identity with more confidence.
I've been taking it since 11-21-14 and I have to say that the only thing that has really been noticeable, mentally, is my emotional reciprocity. I feel more compelled to nurture, protect and give affection to my closest friends; even my guy friends. Nothing has really snapped and yelled FEMALE BRAIN ACTIVATED! :P I've had that brain the whole time, and it's just finally getting the right chemicals.
Quote from: Seras on January 09, 2015, 07:13:36 PM
lol Sammi :D
I was hanging out with my sister and her best friend the other day. They told me some of the least ladylike stories you can imagine.
oh god I can only imagine. I've worked with a lot of woman through out the years and some of the stories they tell make you go wtf lol. Some stuff that I as a guy wouldn't even consider. Woman can look so beautiful on the outside yet terribly horrific on the inside
Once I was accepted into the female club, my girl friends started being much more vulgar around me. I think many women tone it down around men.
Quote from: Tori on January 17, 2015, 05:20:52 PM
Once I was accepted into the female club, my girl friends started being much more vulgar around me. I think many women tone it down around men.
This is so true. The all-ladies dive bar club that I belong to is notorious for quite unladylike behavior!
Quote from: CaptFido87 on January 17, 2015, 04:50:40 PM
Woman can look so beautiful on the outside yet terribly horrific on the inside
Ouch! :eusa_naughty: Could have worded that one a little better.
I have found that to be true with all sides of the gender spectrum- probably has more to do with being a crappy human than anything else.
I know I can attribute these changes to the HRT, because they occurred with the hormonal changes - not with starting therapy or coming out:
1) Faster and deeper emotions. For example, songs are more likely to make me cry, and cry harder. They also do so faster and the bounce up at the end is also faster.
2) My anger and aggression are almost all gone; I no longer stress out over so many little things
3) I care much more about other people and the consequences of my actions on those around me
4) My uncontrollable, spontaneous thoughts have shifted from hating male politicians or unpleasant sexual nonsense (or sometimes an overlapping of the two) to loving my femininity
5) I have lost interest in taking long walks alone and gained interest in small talk
I always had a somewhat feminine way of thinking. Even when presenting as male, I found it easier to work with women than with men in college because our thoughts on the work were more compatible. I stopped eating animal products because the torture and murder of defenseless animals broke my sensitive heart. I found shopping very rewarding when I made unexpected finds. Since starting the HRT though, my thought processes have feminized to a sufficient extent to eliminate any doubt that I am female at heart, as opposed to "mostly female," "80% female," or "more female than male." I think the hormonal imbalance pre-transition did suppress my female way of thinking and HRT is restoring it.
Hormones are just one aspect, though. It is about who I really am. Taking steps to present more feminine, such as my recent switch to women's shirts, has also seemed to make me act more girly. :)
Quote from: CaptFido87 on January 09, 2015, 04:33:13 PM
There have been a lot of comments that really hit me hard in here.
I feel the same way. I just don't act very femininely, I don't feel like a woman, and I have very little understanding of what girls like to do. I try to look to my sister for inspiration, but all she does is shop for bras and watches a lot of that reality TV about girls getting pregnant and stuff. I know I'm still very early on my life and haven't done much yet for the transition, but It makes me think more about this. Right now I act very manly. I burp out loud, release gas, watch sports, fish, and go to theme parks a lot. I really do want to feel more womanly by shopping but even that scares me. A lot of you basically said that taking hrt gives you confidence and makes you feel comfortable with you. I certainly hope so.
I wanna find ways to start acting more feminine now so I can some practice for the future. Maybe i'll make my own thread on that.
I hope you can ways to help better yourself just like the rest of us have. Good luck with becoming more female.
I don't think it's about "acting like a female" or even "becoming more female" (apart from physically, of course) - if your mind tells you that you are female, then that's all there is to it - it's not as if it's impossible for women to "burp out loud, release gas, watch sports, fish, and go to theme parks a lot" - you can be a woman and do all of these things. You shouldn't have to learn to be a "woman" at all, you only have to be open to being you.
I think HRT has made changes, but not really fundamental ones. Violence seems to bother me more for example but my interests haven't changed, I still enjoy the activities that were both traditionally masculine or tradtionally feminine.
By my point of view I have always been a woman, therefore I have always thought like one.
I'm pretty much pre-everything. So I'm interested in reading everyone's experiences. One item I'll note, is that I really liked watching "The Notebook" while my wife didn't enjoy it all that much. She's a very girly GG too, but just can't get into movies marked for women. I on the other hand, have taken dates to see fem-movies (anyone remember "Steel Magnolias").
As for my GD, I've had flashes all my life that hey I'm female. There are some strong women out there, very feminine strong women. There was one that just passed a few weeks ago, Mary Davis. Mary owned and managed the Portofino Hotel in Redondo Beach. She raced cars in the golden era of the 50's driving Aston Martin's and Mercedes Benz's, always breaking the glass ceiling. So, please don't always think that women have to stick to gender stereotypes.
-Alana
Just some food for thought.
How does one truely define "thinking like a girl"?
Quote from: Jill F on January 17, 2015, 07:27:52 PM
This is so true. The all-ladies dive bar club that I belong to is notorious for quite unladylike behavior!
Off topic I know, but say Jill that wouldn't be the dive bar in Van Nays would it??
-Alana
I found, in 5 years of hrt, that the biggest factor effected was emotions, they went through the roof. there were small changes in other areas, but nothing major. might help to add i was 40 when i started hrt. so that lends to a lot of learned and ingrained thought process.
a big change came for me with SRS. prior, i was a hetrosexual. never interested in men. shortly after srs, men got interesting, then cute and handsome, then OMG. now, hetro again, total flip with srs to align with my hetro prefrence.
I still work a steriotype male job love to hunt, fish, camp, etc. hate shopping, house work, laundry and cooking. Never got into the dress and heels look, prefer still my camo and boots./
i reckon every one is different.... viva la differance
Quote from: Jennygirl on January 18, 2015, 11:40:07 AM
Ouch! :eusa_naughty: Could have worded that one a little better.
Oops :embarrassed: I didn't mean it like that. Kind of just came out, but I think you got the gist of what I meant.
I recently got myself some girl friends to hang around with. I'd say they aren't the most girliest girls around, but they are fun to talk to. I've been learning from them and taking hints on other stuff, which helps in the long run. Even better for me is the one girls dad is a transgender woman, so we can talk about how that effects everything.
I still can't figure out why one needs a purse so gigantic. It just doesn't seem necessary to me for it to be that big
When I would go out with a guy friend to a bar they would always give me befuddled looks and shake their heads when I wouldn't go hit on a girl. I would tell them that that's just not the way I am. I can't just talk to someone and take them home. I never once had a "get laid" agenda. They would be the same way when I refused to go to a strip club. I've always been very sensitive, crying at emotional movie scenes, super smiley when meeting a new friend somewhere, easily annoyed by sex talk or those typical vulgar references, always preferring female singers in my music so I could sing along, and my relationships have always been disasters probably due to not playing the protective alpha role. I don't even know what "thinking like a male" even is.
A couple months in.
1) Faster/deeper emotions. Slightly. Not as much as I would have liked, but definitely improved.
2) Anger/Agression. Not really. I was really hoping to loose more of this by now.
3) Caring about others. Again not really, but I've always been fairly compassionate so that isn't saying much.
4) Hating male politicians. I'm going to expand this to I hate men that make the gender look bad. Right now especially this is the republican party. I feel like they are fighting a war against women again. Trying to take away maternity leave, deny abortions, deny contraceptives, etc... Not changed at all.
5) I still suck at small talk.
Quote from: Steph34 on January 18, 2015, 12:28:24 PM
I know I can attribute these changes to the HRT, because they occurred with the hormonal changes - not with starting therapy or coming out:
1) Faster and deeper emotions. For example, songs are more likely to make me cry, and cry harder. They also do so faster and the bounce up at the end is also faster.
2) My anger and aggression are almost all gone; I no longer stress out over so many little things
3) I care much more about other people and the consequences of my actions on those around me
4) My uncontrollable, spontaneous thoughts have shifted from hating male politicians or unpleasant sexual nonsense (or sometimes an overlapping of the two) to loving my femininity
5) I have lost interest in taking long walks alone and gained interest in small talk
I always had a somewhat feminine way of thinking. Even when presenting as male, I found it easier to work with women than with men in college because our thoughts on the work were more compatible. I stopped eating animal products because the torture and murder of defenseless animals broke my sensitive heart. I found shopping very rewarding when I made unexpected finds. Since starting the HRT though, my thought processes have feminized to a sufficient extent to eliminate any doubt that I am female at heart, as opposed to "mostly female," "80% female," or "more female than male." I think the hormonal imbalance pre-transition did suppress my female way of thinking and HRT is restoring it.
Hormones are just one aspect, though. It is about who I really am. Taking steps to present more feminine, such as my recent switch to women's shirts, has also seemed to make me act more girly. :)
Quote1) Faster and deeper emotions. For example, songs are more likely to make me cry, and cry harder. They also do so faster and the bounce up at the end is also faster.
2) My anger and aggression are almost all gone; I no longer stress out over so many little things
3) I care much more about other people and the consequences of my actions on those around me
4) My uncontrollable, spontaneous thoughts have shifted from hating male politicians or unpleasant sexual nonsense (or sometimes an overlapping of the two) to loving my femininity
5) I have lost interest in taking long walks alone and gained interest in small talk
1. I was always like this
2. Umm yeah a bit. Road rage still upsets me though and I have a tendency to want to get back at people rather than just let it go. Helps that I have a bit of a lead foot and emergency vehicle driver training. Or not.
3. I always did.
4. I don't hate male politicians at all. In fact I kind of despise some female ones. But my issues with them are more about issues and not about gender. But yeah I love my (little bit of) femininity. Oh my god do I love it. Even though I don't have to dress in secret anymore sometimes if I have spare time I will go try on stuff just for the heck of it. I look at myself in the mirror more often and more spontaneously now. I watch a lot of youtube videos with howtos for fashion, makeup etc.
5. I was always like this.
So, do I get a cookie? LOL.