Yes, I am new here. And I'm sorry if this thread doesn't belong here.
But in any case, I want to start this journey but I am still on the edge about everything. The thing is, I worry about how doing this will affect my relationship with the other people in my life. I have already been told no because of worry about possible medical complications. And my health insurance is not in my name so I don't know how secret I can really be about this. But if I don't do this it will drive me insane. I have tried binding with a long binder that hides my shape but although I am happy with how I look in the mirror I still feel the presence of the wrong body shape.
So I have these questions for those who are on T:
How fast do the changes take place? (I worry about the changes going too quickly that I won't be able to adjust to myself appearance wise and voice wise)
Does it make some men more dysphoric in other areas (bottom and breasts) once the dysphoria decreases with body shape, face shape, and voice?
I presume it is okay to be on hormones before chest surgery? (My insurance requires I be on hormones for six months before any surgery)
Is there ever really regrettable changes?
Thanks.
Hi DarkWolf_7, welcome to Susan's Place! Do you have a name you'd like us to use? I'm putting on my seatbelt in case they move us to Introductions! :laugh: The guys will be along with some answers for you. See you around the site!
Hugs, Devlyn
DarkWolf_7
Welcome to Susan's family.(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.sherv.net%2Fcm%2Femoticons%2Fbugs%2Fbutterfly-smiley-emoticon.gif&hash=55ebfb136b45eac8ba9632f37111f98067fc3aa6) (http://www.sherv.net/)
There are many here that can offer information to help.
I bet soon one of the men will stop by and get you stared with answers to your questions.
So many topics to explore and posts to write.
Pull up a chair and give a look over the following links for site info...(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.sherv.net%2Fcm%2Femoticons%2Fobject%2Fchair-3-smiley-emoticon-emoji.png&hash=f6de189a088518c5de131e0c9ce29661e7a52a55) (http://www.sherv.net/)
- Site Terms of Service and rules to live by (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html)
- Standard Terms and Definitions (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,54369.0.html)
- Post Ranks ( including when you can upload an avatar) (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,114.0.html.)
- Reputation rules (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,18960.0.html)
- Photo, avatars, and signature images policy (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,59974.msg383866.html#msg383866)
Stay safe and healthy passage on your path, popcorn?
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi62.tinypic.com%2F33a6ouf.jpg&hash=70038a414397cf8547aa00ee9064953fc318e096)
Izzy
Forum News: new for our members under 18 a new safe place just for you. Youth talk.
I'm going to give the standard disclaimer that everyone's experience is different. It is primarily up to your genetics how quickly and to what degree your changes occur. So with that in mind, this was my experience so far (14 months on T)
Changes kind of happen when they do. I got a lot of leg hair quickly. I had growth below quickly. Everything else has just been incremental. I really noticed my body shape starting to change at about 6 months and that has picked up in speed since then. My voice dropped once at about 2 months and again at about 5 months. It got lower slowly in between those times and since but those were my two biggest drops. For me, I was so excited to see all these changes that adjusting to my appearance and voice were not a problem. I love every change I notice. And despite knowing otherwise and hearing otherwise in my recorded voice, I still hear my "girl" voice in my head when I talk. If you are concerned about the potential speed of your changes, you could start on a lower dose and go up from there. But for me, the changes couldn't and can't come fast enough.
For me, yes, I became more dysphoric about other things once some things got better. But I am also better at coping with that dysphoria because outwardly, I am unmistakeably male now. The things I feel dysphoric about these days are either already changing or are things only seen by me and my wife. I have really tried hard to focus on the positive changes any time I start to get bogged down in the dysphoric pain. I'm not always successful. Sometimes I fail miserably. But overall, my dysphoria is vastly improved from 18 months ago.
Being on hormones before top surgery is great. I've heard from other guys that developing your chest on T can actually help you get better results in some cases. I had top surgery at about 5 months on T and my chest was not developed muscle wise.
I have not had any change yet that I've really been unhappy with. My hairline has receded a little but I actually like the more male hairline. I did develop some acne but that is getting better and I'm treating it better as well. And that should only be temporary. The only thing I can see starting to develop that I'm not thrilled about is I'm starting to get back hair lol. That is the only place I don't want it but I know it goes with the territory and I can always get it waxed lol.
But otherwise T has been a great experience for me so far. For me, the mental and emotional changes of finally having my brain fed with the right chemicals has been just as profound as the physical changes.
Hope that helps :)
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on January 30, 2015, 08:31:25 PM
Hi DarkWolf_7, welcome to Susan's Place! Do you have a name you'd like us to use? I'm putting on my seatbelt in case they move us to Introductions! :laugh: The guys will be along with some answers for you. See you around the site!
Hugs, Devlyn
You can just call me DarkWolf if that is all right. I know it's not a name but I don't like using names online.
Quote from: mrs izzy on January 30, 2015, 08:35:34 PM
DarkWolf_7
Welcome to Susan's family.(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.sherv.net%2Fcm%2Femoticons%2Fbugs%2Fbutterfly-smiley-emoticon.gif&hash=55ebfb136b45eac8ba9632f37111f98067fc3aa6) (http://www.sherv.net/)
There are many here that can offer information to help.
I bet soon one of the men will stop by and get you stared with answers to your questions.
So many topics to explore and posts to write.
Pull up a chair and give a look over the following links for site info...(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.sherv.net%2Fcm%2Femoticons%2Fobject%2Fchair-3-smiley-emoticon-emoji.png&hash=f6de189a088518c5de131e0c9ce29661e7a52a55) (http://www.sherv.net/)
- Site Terms of Service and rules to live by (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html)
- Standard Terms and Definitions (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,54369.0.html)
- Post Ranks ( including when you can upload an avatar) (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,114.0.html.)
- Reputation rules (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,18960.0.html)
- Photo, avatars, and signature images policy (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,59974.msg383866.html#msg383866)
Stay safe and healthy passage on your path, popcorn?
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi62.tinypic.com%2F33a6ouf.jpg&hash=70038a414397cf8547aa00ee9064953fc318e096)
Izzy
Forum News: new for our members under 18 a new safe place just for you. Youth talk.
Thank you. :)
I have just been guessing what changes might occur for me based on how my male family members look. I wish I could see the end result. And thank you Dex.
Quote from: DarkWolf_7 on January 30, 2015, 10:47:55 PM
You can just call me DarkWolf if that is all right. I know it's not a name but I don't like using names online.
Thank you. :)
I have just been guessing what changes might occur for me based on how my male family members look. I wish I could see the end result. And thank you Dex.
Fair enough, DarkWolf!
Hugs, Devlyn
Hey Darkwolf,
As stated before, everyone's experience is different so I can only tell you mine and I can't guarantee you would experience the same.
The quickest changes for me were lower growth and voice. The lower growth happened surprisingly quickly (noticed growth within a week, largest change was within the first two months so far) but the only way I needed to really "get used to it" was in regards to jerking off with different anatomy than before, and it did get quite sensitive at a time during which I couldn't pack and had to wear really soft underwear. My voice itself hasn't changed as much as I'd hoped but I felt it changing very early on. My throat for very sore and I felt like I was getting sick within the first week and it stayed for a while before going away. It comes back whenever my voice is about to drop significantly again.
I was actually concerned about changes coming too quickly, which is part of why I am on a low dose, however, I've actually wished changes would come quicker. When I look subjectively at my changes, I know that I'm about on par with other guys on 5 months, yet I do feel like I'm falling behind in places like leg hair and the amount my voice has dropped.
I have not experienced many body shape changes and I've felt dysphoric more than before recently, however, I believe it is because I went from passing 75% of the time to now about 10% of the time, and nobody really knows why. My face is actually more masculine than it used to be. So I have experienced more body dysphoria because of that.
It's definitely fine to be on hormones before surgery, some people think even better. You may get nicer results if you've got pecs to place your nipples with. Most guys start hormones first, it's very common.
My personal experience with 'regrettable' changes is that things change slowly enough that you've got plenty of time to stop T before a change progresses further, with the only exception of lower growth. There are permanent changes on T like body hair and voice deepening, but these happen slowly over time, so if it begins to make you uncomfortable, you can stop before it gets worse. Of course, you should still be sure that you want to start, but I know that many people still have doubt in the back of their mind, and that can relieve it. I knew I needed to start T if I wanted to have a life, but I still sometimes had doubts. As soon as I started T however, I knew this was right. I got so excited for the changes and I wish things would happen quicker- I definitely am not as afraid anymore. The doubts are gone.
Hello DW,
I think the kinds of things you are talking about are common, normal concerns. If you can find a therapist knowledgable about this subject, that's going to help a LOT. (BUt if they aren't knowledgeable therapy could actually hurt, so you need to look around carefully. If you have some kind of transgender or even LGBT center, this would be where to start.)
Hair growth, lower growth, and voice changes are somewhat early. I actually think I first noticed I was able to do a push up (regular) and my arm strength (not so much legs) were much stronger. I can now pick up my 20 lb dog like a football (perhaps not recommended). :)
I am no doubt much older (actually than a lot of guys here). However, strangely it has been a lot better/easier. My friends all accepted me (minus one or two, I guess you learn who your friends actually are). Families can be very tricky. My parents are deceased so I didn't have to deal wtih that. Some parents get right on board, some never do, and some are in the middle. They begin being very opposed and then eventually gradually come around. Usually one parent is more accepting than the other.
ID matching is more of a PITA, than a real issue in most cases. I can't deny it can cause trouble. I chose my doctor due to her being trans friendly, so they ignored my ID and just called me my chosen name. However for awhile I'd give my birth name right at the beginning.
I am "out" as trans. I never decided to go stealth. It's up to you what you do.
Regrets, strangely for me it was losing my singing voice. It was not that I was a singer. If you are, you need to go thru transition particularly carefully. Though it is doable.
--Jay
Quote from: DarkWolf_7 on January 30, 2015, 08:20:05 PM
Yes, I am new here. And I'm sorry if this thread doesn't belong here.
But in any case, I want to start this journey but I am still on the edge about everything. The thing is, I worry about how doing this will affect my relationship with the other people in my life. I have already been told no because of worry about possible medical complications. And my health insurance is not in my name so I don't know how secret I can really be about this. But if I don't do this it will drive me insane. I have tried binding with a long binder that hides my shape but although I am happy with how I look in the mirror I still feel the presence of the wrong body shape.
So I have these questions for those who are on T:
How fast do the changes take place? (I worry about the changes going too quickly that I won't be able to adjust to myself appearance wise and voice wise)
Does it make some men more dysphoric in other areas (bottom and breasts) once the dysphoria decreases with body shape, face shape, and voice?
I presume it is okay to be on hormones before chest surgery? (My insurance requires I be on hormones for six months before any surgery)
Is there ever really regrettable changes?
Thanks.
Quote from: aleon515 on January 31, 2015, 01:10:04 PM
Regrets, strangely for me it was losing my singing voice. It was not that I was a singer. If you are, you need to go thru transition particularly carefully. Though it is doable.
I guess I should consider myself lucky that I can't sing at all.
I am seeing a therapist currently who is trans friendly though I am not sure how knowledgeable my therapist is on hormones so I've been researching. (Though I presume I will likely have to visit another therapist before I can get started on hormones).
And thank you to those who replied. I am glad to know that the changes happen slow enough though I still think I might want to be on a low dosage. I just don't know if you can change dosage later.
You can certainly change the dosage -- a good doctor, who is knowledgeable about this area of medicine, will be monitoring your blood levels, and your changes, over time. Part of their job is to work with you to calibrate your dosage to get the results you want and to minimize potential side effects. They should start you on a low dose, anyway, to see how your body responds.
Quote from: DarkWolf_7 on January 30, 2015, 08:20:05 PM
So I have these questions for those who are on T:
How fast do the changes take place? (I worry about the changes going too quickly that I won't be able to adjust to myself appearance wise and voice wise)
Does it make some men more dysphoric in other areas (bottom and breasts) once the dysphoria decreases with body shape, face shape, and voice?
I presume it is okay to be on hormones before chest surgery? (My insurance requires I be on hormones for six months before any surgery)
Is there ever really regrettable changes?
Thanks.
1) Everyone will be different. I started having some voice droppage within three days of starting T. I was already a buff hairy beast. ;D
2) My top dysphoria got worse and my bottom dysphoria improved within about a week of starting T.
3) Yes. I think there are even a few surgeons out there still who are hesitant to do surgery if you're not on hormones. They are definitely in the minority though.
4) I don't think so, but it really depends how you look at it. A decent doctor will start you on a low dose and this'll give you time to acclimate to the changes so that it isn't overwhelming.
As far as your insurance: I'm on my mom's insurance. She knows I'm using it, but if I hadn't told her, she wouldn't. I asked the other day and no one (doctor or insurance) has sent anything to her address. So if you're living separately, I think it's very doable. The only issues would be what kind of coverage and limits there are on the insurance. Is it the type of policy that makes you pay out of pocket until you hit a dollar limit? That would be something I'd want to know, as lab work can be expensive in some places.
Quote from: DarkWolf_7 on January 30, 2015, 08:20:05 PM
So I have these questions for those who are on T:
How fast do the changes take place? (I worry about the changes going too quickly that I won't be able to adjust to myself appearance wise and voice wise)
Does it make some men more dysphoric in other areas (bottom and breasts) once the dysphoria decreases with body shape, face shape, and voice?
I presume it is okay to be on hormones before chest surgery? (My insurance requires I be on hormones for six months before any surgery)
Is there ever really regrettable changes?
Thanks.
1. Some changes happen within the first few weeks. For me this was hair growth, increased appetite, oily face, hot flushes and sweating a lot more than I used to, genital growth and the ever so slight voice drop. Things became noticeable to others at one month and my voice really started breaking and dropping at 2.5 months
2. On t my dysphoria is not quite as severe in general. I also have a lot more self confidence which helps ease my dysphoria too.
3. Starting hormones before top surgery is not required but is recommended because you can develop pecs which makes surgery results better and nipple placement and incision placement eassier .
4. I don't regret any changes yet (three months on t) except for back and shoulder hair. It is what it is though and can be easily solved by shaving or waxing. So no, don't really regret anything from t
Quote from: ftmax on February 02, 2015, 05:45:46 PM
1) Everyone will be different. I started having some voice droppage within three days of starting T. I was already a buff hairy beast. ;D
2) My top dysphoria got worse and my bottom dysphoria improved within about a week of starting T.
3) Yes. I think there are even a few surgeons out there still who are hesitant to do surgery if you're not on hormones. They are definitely in the minority though.
4) I don't think so, but it really depends how you look at it. A decent doctor will start you on a low dose and this'll give you time to acclimate to the changes so that it isn't overwhelming.
As far as your insurance: I'm on my mom's insurance. She knows I'm using it, but if I hadn't told her, she wouldn't. I asked the other day and no one (doctor or insurance) has sent anything to her address. So if you're living separately, I think it's very doable. The only issues would be what kind of coverage and limits there are on the insurance. Is it the type of policy that makes you pay out of pocket until you hit a dollar limit? That would be something I'd want to know, as lab work can be expensive in some places.
The insurance I have right now does have a deductible but it usually gets used up before I need it for anything.
Quote from: DarkWolf_7 on January 30, 2015, 08:20:05 PM
How fast do the changes take place? (I worry about the changes going too quickly that I won't be able to adjust to myself appearance wise and voice wise)
Does it make some men more dysphoric in other areas (bottom and breasts) once the dysphoria decreases with body shape, face shape, and voice?
I presume it is okay to be on hormones before chest surgery? (My insurance requires I be on hormones for six months before any surgery)
Is there ever really regrettable changes?
Thanks.
- The changes depend on the person obviously, but I personally found that the changes seem to happen faster when you watch other people's as compared to your own. It seems really dramatic from the outside but when you're actually inhabiting the body it doesn't take you by surprise. Every now and then I'd find a patch of hair that wasn't there before and be like "wtf when did that happen" but it wasn't shocking or upsetting, just different.
- For a while I was way more dysphoric about things, because I felt kind of "freakish" looking like a male but having a female body under my clothes. But I managed to find a way to make waiting for surgery bearable. I just look at it like it is an obstacle that I have for the moment - certain things, like a change room, having to use a stall (I don't STP), not being able to take my shirt off, being more careful with dating and girls...it's annoying and sometimes a little scary depending on the circumstance, but it isn't the end of the world. I find a private stall to change, I'm more selective with the women I choose to date/tell, I wear a shirt to the pool or beach. It's only temporary until I can have these things addressed.
- And yeah almost everyone is on HRT before chest surgery, not always, but most of the time that is the case since HRT is more cost effective.
- Depends what is regret-worthy, haha. There are things about HRT that are not reversible, or mostly non reversible. Voice stays mostly the same, it can get somewhat more feminine if you stop transition but it will never be what it was before. Genital changes are mostly irreversible, I've heard of some shrinkage and changes in erectile ability but it will still be pretty large. Some facial hair would probably remain, but thinned out.
Quote from: DarkWolf_7 on January 30, 2015, 08:20:05 PM
So I have these questions for those who are on T:
How fast do the changes take place? (I worry about the changes going too quickly that I won't be able to adjust to myself appearance wise and voice wise)
Does it make some men more dysphoric in other areas (bottom and breasts) once the dysphoria decreases with body shape, face shape, and voice?
I presume it is okay to be on hormones before chest surgery? (My insurance requires I be on hormones for six months before any surgery)
Is there ever really regrettable changes?
Thanks.
How fast do the changes take place? (I worry about the changes going too quickly that I won't be able to adjust to myself appearance wise and voice wise)- It really depends on what dose your doctor puts you on. If you're straight up on a higher dose, you'll have changes sooner than if you're eased onto it really slowly. My physical changes didn't start for about a month, however my voice, appetite and libido were changing after two weeks.
Does it make some men more dysphoric in other areas (bottom and breasts) once the dysphoria decreases with body shape, face shape, and voice?- I found that even once one thing I was dysphoric about was eliminated, I ended up just being generally self-conscious about those things as anyone would be. For example, my body fat has largely redistributed, and now I'm less self-conscious about the shape of my booty, but more about the lack of hair on it. I'm less worried about not looking like a guy, and more worried about not looking hot af. The only thing that really remains to be dysphoria-triggering to me is my chest. God darned chest.
I presume it is okay to be on hormones before chest surgery? (My insurance requires I be on hormones for six months before any surgery)
Most definitely, and most guys are. :)
Is there ever really regrettable changes? It depends on how you want to appear. If someone wants to be buff and hairy, and that happens, then there will be no regret. If someone wants to remain to be a nice little slice of lemon meringue deliciousness, they may be a little put off by all the hair and muscle changes. I personally think that the HRT just gives you the canvas you need for your invisible ink to show up. If you really feel the need to transition, once you have and you're where you feel comfortable, your style will fall into place. Once the hormones are in place, a lot of thing are still optional.