So, after FFS my soon to be ex knew I was totally stir crazy not getting out.. she was like you pass why are you so worried.. and It was really more about swelling and bruising.. hard to hide those bruises ..
Anyway so we went to Red Lobster..
All is good and she by accident said my male name to the waitress...
She almost cried and I was like oh no big deal sweetie don't worry about it..
So then later she said he needs more sauce.. ugh!
Anyway it was ok and I did not want her to be upset.. she would never do anything to hurt me on purpose.
So fast forward three more weeks and I am full time now and we have friends that want to take us to dinner at the most expensive establishment in the area.. So I am like oh crap what am I going to wear...
Well my wife gets sick so I was like well I suppose we can't go.. and they were like well you are coming anyway.....
So I told them the story about Red Lobster in a funny way to make them aware that its easy to slip especially after a drink or two... since they knew me as male for so long.
All was good until desert time and my buddies wife which I love to death.. said he wants.... and She was so upset.. and I laughed it off..
She told the waitress oh! I mean she not he.. we are she's and then pointing to her hubby said he is a he...
She was still upset but I think the waitress really thought she had made a mistake and never gave it a second thought.
Anyway, life has been interesting to say the least :)
Swelling is going down from FFS and I get hair extensions Thursday and a makeover so I want to post some before and after...
The hardest thing for me has been finding makeup that matches my skin color and looks natural.
Same problem cis women have sometimes so whatever..
Dodie
Big hug! Someday you'll just have distant memories of things like this.
Hugs, Devlyn
i always tell my friends that i prefer female pronouns but if they make a mistake it is better to let it slide instead of correcting themselves, when they bring up that they made a mistake it is worse than the mistake in the first place
Something I've had to tell myself is that even cis gendered people still mix up pronouns every now and again. I'm still pretty sensitive to it too but it gets easier the more confidence you build.
Thanks Girls,
I used to be a bouncer looking Dude... and everyone loved the dude... so my close friends just seem make mistakes.. I don't care at home or private parties... they are all still adjusting just like I am....
At least strangers don't do it now.. no more sir's
Dodie
I lived with the he and him thing when I went full time as well. At the very beginning it bugged me, but nowadays I could care less if someone called me a rock lobster, it just doesn't matter. I see people mis-gender each other on a day to day basis and they aren't even trans. The longer and longer I live full time the more I see it so I know that slip-ups are not necessarily "getting clocked" moments as much as they are "mouth going faster than the brain" moments. Heck I have mis-gendered women I have been out at dinner with, so I know I have a mouth that shoots off to fast as well :-p
But we tend to be more aware of slip-ups. Welcome to life on the other side :)
Quote from: Madison (kiara jamie) on February 02, 2015, 11:42:12 AM
i always tell my friends that i prefer female pronouns but if they make a mistake it is better to let it slide instead of correcting themselves, when they bring up that they made a mistake it is worse than the mistake in the first place
Totally agree with you Madison. I have always hung out with a mostly LGTQ crowd and the guys frequently have referred to me and others as 'girl' I have cisgender girlfriends who get misgendered too.
Thanks for sharing your outings Dodie; sounds like fun but now i'm hungry again and it it a good thing there are no lobsters around here.