Hi girls,
It's been a while since my complete 180 thread, so I figured I'd give an update.
My divorce date was set for Feb. 18th and things had gotten pretty bad. Well, a couple of days ago she takes me to put a deposit on my new apartment and busted out crying. She apologized for treating so badly and wanted to talk. As I have kids involved too, of course I decided to listen. She took me out to a nice dinner and then came home. She had told me her therapist (not trans friendly apparently) had recommended her to divorce me, and her mother took advantage of the situation to push her along (she never liked me anyway). She is finally realizing that she needs to make her own decisions about what is best for her and her family (me and the kids) instead of letting everyone else influence her.
I don't like her mother, but I would never make her choose between her mother and me. I just avoid her mother like the plague and let her have her relationship with her. She is angry with her mother for manipulating her and her mother was a real "B" when she told her I was staying. That woman even told my SON that he and his mom would be better off if I was just gone. You don't tell a kid that about their father!
Anyways, I mentioned in my other thread "complete 180 update" about how my wife treated me and how I was a prisoner at home all the time. Since she Came to me, and the ball was in my court, I used this time to set some NEW ground rules!!! I am going to get a part time job and have my own money! (at least if she 180's again I won't be broke and homeless), getting a motor scooter for transportation until I get my Drivers License back, I'll come and go as I please, and will no longer tolerate her flip-floppin BS or I'm outta here. I quit feeling sorry for myself and ain't taking no more BS!
I did agree to go back to part time, pretty much at home only so that she doesn't take as much garbage from family and friends who are narrow minded idiots. At least I can come home, get comfortable and feel normal for a while, but not be discriminated against when it comes to employment. (I know, it sucks)
Oh, I almost forgot, as one of MY NEW RULES, Susans will NEVER be off limits to me AGAIN!
So, I guess I had to compromise, but at least I have my family back, and more freedom!
Thanks for letting me rant and let you know how I'm doing
Compromise is the hallmark of any good relationship. I say as long as you find happiness in this arrangement, go for it. It's nice to hear your wife is more self-aware of what's going on. Good for you guys! Good luck and hugs.
Thanks,
She was fine with me being full time (over a year) til her family and friends got their 2 cents worth in. Just trying to get along and make fewer waves I guess, and I am gaining some freedoms so I guess it's cool. We go Wednesday to file our motion to dismiss!
I feel we all have the right to expect respect and boundaries. We just feel we don't. I love hearing stories where it worked out. My first wife just decided to stop engaging life my secon allows me to dress anytime I want and grow breasts. But that was my expectations and her I could give a (&@" moment! She is awesome...we are awesome.. Congrats
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Cool and congrats! I can relate to the part time thing. Hope things continue to go well. It's definitely a challenging thing to stand between two universes.
Hopefully all things work out for you!
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I am happy for you.
You definitely are much stronger and decisive since I read your last post. :)