In a few posts, I told everyone here how my wife confiscated all of my things (wigs, clothes, make-up) when she found out I posted my picture on a tg friendly site when I was trying to find a name for myself. I thought the world audience could help, and felt the picture was incognito enough that no one would recognize me. I felt fairly safe posting it, and didn't see anything wrong with it. The same picture as the one to the left. She was furious and told me it was very deceitful on my part to dress up while the kids were in the house sleeping. It's been a sore subject around here for the last 2 months. Anyway, last night things really came to a head. We had a long discussion about my desires, and I told her that I would not be deceitful if she could only accept me for who I really am, like she said she did before we were married (I had told her in advance). I told her I wanted our marriage to work, but the only way I could go forward was for her to accept all of me. I told her if she didn't want to take part that would be okay, but to please just give me some private time, where I wouldn't have to feel like I was sneaking anymore. I ended up going to be in a huff, and it seemed like are relationship had hit a wall.
This morning I woke up and went downstairs, and all the confiscated things were there in a pile with a note on top. "Just don't do it when the kids are in the house." I went back upstairs and thanked her for understanding. I asked if she minded if I hung the clothes in my closet. We are actually in the process of remodeling the bedroom. She said, "when you finish the painting and flooring we will make a spot for your things". I was on cloud nine.
She may not like it but it looks like she is trying to accept it. I plan on taking things extremely slow, but it feels so nice to know I don't have to hide my things anymore. I can hang them in my closet just like a real woman would. I also told her that I would be happy to see a therapist, and we could go together to some of the appointments if she thought that would help. She agreed. She wants to try to understand this. Progress is being made! If you can't tell, I am very excited. I just thought I would share, I am sure there are others like myself out there that know what it feels like when a barrier comes down. It's just so liberating.
All my love,
Lisabeth
That's great news Lisabeth. Congratulations to you and kudos to your wife for having the fortitude to rethink her decision and reconsider. That takes a lot more than most of us have.
Dennis
Congratulation Lisabeth,
It just goes to show with time patience and communication it is possible to get beyond the misunderstandings and the plain old rejection of who we are. Kudos.
Cassie
Baby steps, baby steps. It is so important to communicate if you both want the relationship to continue. As you have found out or are finding out it is all about compromise, communication, and give and take on both your parts. Stay away from ultimatums, as your behaviour affects you both equally, even when it is done in private. It's great that you've made such progress and that you've agreed to see a therapist. It's great news.
Steph
Lisabeth,
I'm realy happy for you. Sound like the first step to a better realtionship in a expanding world for the both of you.
Love Ya Sis
:)
Jillieann
Sooo.. Happy for Lisabeth,
QuoteBaby steps, baby steps. It is so important to communicate if you both want the relationship to continue.
That advice of Steph's worked for me a while ago. The other thing is that you may have to accept some compromises but i really think that is what life is when shared with another.
Shelley
Hi everyone,
I have seen this happen here before. Someone gets there hopes up that progress is finally being made only to have the "rug pulled out". My wife insisted that in order to move forward I had to be totally honest with her about my recent female purchases. I agreed, and told her how I had put some jeans, bras, and two pairrs of high heeled shoes since she had originally confiscated my things. I also told her how I skipped my office Christmas party to drive 60 miles to get some of the things. Once again, she became furious. I explained that she wanted honesty and that was what I was trying to giver her. When I am honest I am met with all kinds of negativity, so that is why I hide. She says I'm a *^&#*# nut case, and names several psychological disorders that I surely have. She's an R.N. on a behavioral health psych unit. I would think in her profession she would be more understanding, but she is not. She adds that if we ever divorce down the road, any judge will make sure any visits I have with my children will have to be supervised. It seems that she plans on being very vindictive if the marriage doesn't work. I want the marriage to work for my children's sake. I love them more than you can imagine. At another point I suggested that we go out sometime together, with me dressed, in Provincetown, Mass. where transgendered individuals are accepted. She says absolutely not, because it would be too embarassing for her if we ran into someone we knew. The chances are extremely slim of that, it is one state away, although we did run into someone we knew there once. So, two steps forward one step back I guess. I am feeling low right now. Some progress has been made, in that things are out in the open, but there is so much negativity on her part, I can't see how things will get better any time soon. Thanks for being there for me. I love you all.
Lisabeth
Hello Lisabeth,
Not a very good turn of events by any stretch of the imagination. It's seems that your wife is in the know about what TG issues are, but doesn't want to admit them. It would also seem as though she is very upset that you would go to such extremes as skipping a company function to buy cloths.
At this point in time I would have to say that going out together with you dressed is a little too much too fast as well. You both need to sit down and discuss this through, where you see your relationship going how far you intend to go, what situation can you both live with. Just remember you are not going to be able to have it both ways. And the biggest issue of all is you are going to have to be prepared for the consequences, and those can have a tragic side.
There is almost no way around this, it's going to be tough but if you want to stay in your marriage then you are going to have to fight for it. But one final point, staying in an unhappy marriage for the sake of the children is not often the best solution for any family.
Steph
Hi Lisabeth,
I really feel for you. When your wife said she wanted honesty what she wanted to know was had you been going on behind her back. This you admitted to. The fact is if you want to preserve this marriage you should not have gone behind her back on this. It constitutes a betrayal. Your fem side should have told you this. You worked things out only to have it fall apart because of your infidelity. Infidelity is not just having relations with another person. It is also doing things which you have promised not to do.
If you are going to work this out you have to apologise. You have to make this up to her. What did it accomplish going behind her back? You talked. She relented. Gave you back your stuff, only to find what? That you had gone behind her back when you knew better. I'm sorry to be a little harsh here but it is the facts of the matter that have you in hot water. It's a relationship. You ask for some give and take yet you disrespect her by going behind her back. I hope I'm making sense to you here.
Anyway, it's just my two cents. Take it for what it's worth.
Cassie
Lisabeth,
I'm hurting for you too. :icon_sadblinky:
Your wife needs time to adjust.
It sounds like she lashed out at you because she is hurting and confused.
I think what Cassandra said
Quoteyou disrespect her by going behind her back
is one thing your wife is hurting about even if you thought it was really no big deal.
Talk to her tell her and show her you love her and need her.
Don't push your cross-dressing, but do be very open and honest.
Again give her time a lots and lots of
TLC.
Pray for you.
Love Ya Sis
Jillieann
Yes your right Melissa and always be honest.
Jillieann
Lizbeth,
It is good to hear that you and your wife are communicating, but openness can often be painful as well. The others here have given you some good advice, particularly about the need to keep communications open and apologizing for past transgressions. My wife is very accepting of my crossdressing, but when we were first working through these issues there was a lot of pain for both of us. What hurt her the most (and I suspect this is the case with your wife as well) is the fact that I hid things from her--even if my reason for hiding them was to avoid hurting her. Another of my wife's concerns is not letting friends and family know about my crossdressing--it would be embarrasing to her. We have three grown children who have all moved away from home. Even though all are mature and quite open adults who would probably accept the fact that I am a crossdresser, my wife does not want them to know anything about Louise. I suspect your wife has similar feelings. Whether you or I think these feelings are irrational or not, the fact is that our wives have these feelings and we need to respect that.
I hope and pray that you and your wife can work through this.
Thanks everyone for you words of wisdom. Cassie, you are correct, when you go behind someone's back it can only come back to hurt everyone down the line. I know I shouldn't have done this. I did actually buy the things before she returned my others. At that point I really did not know if it would be days, weeks, months, or years that I would have them back. I know honesty is the best policy, but I also know when I tell her the truth about my expenditures she ends up furious with me, so I hide. I know that's not a great excuse. At this point she wants me to stop buying things for my fem side completely. I would like to do that for her to make her happy, but I'm not sure how long I can comply. I really have all I need now, but sometimes it seems I just have no self control when I get that desire for something feminine, and I know at some point I will break down. I guess that's why I need to find a good therapist. The thing about therapy, is I'm not looking to stop dressing, just to have more self control when it is going to effect those around me. I know she does not like when I put my picture on the internet, so in an effort to come to some level of peace and understanding in our relationship, I may change my picture to a generic one to make her happy. I hope everyone understands. I do like using my real picture, but her understanding is more imporant to me right now. Anyway, I should get going. I want you all to know how much I appreciate your input and support.
Lisabeth
Hi Lisabeth,
Time, patience and communication are the keys here. You say you have enough. Good, let that tide you over until you can come to some understanding that will allow an occasional self indulgence. Just don't do it behind her back. A straight forward I'm going to buy this anyway and I hope you will understand is far better than her finding a receipt for a new pair of pumps she did not receive. If you expect to keep this relationship together and healthy, honesty and communication is the only recipe that stands a chance of working. You will simply have to be happy with what you have now so that in the future you can shop without risking a divorce.
Therapy is good. When you find a good therapist, maybe at some point you could get her to go with you and help her better understand so that she does not feel so threatened. For her when you go behind her back, it's like you are seeing another woman and you are that woman.
Just some thoughts to consider.
Cassie
Thanks Cassie,
I am hoping my wife will join me for a few sessions with the therapist, but I am also hoping that it is to understand me and is not done in an effort to "cure" me so to speak. I really like who I am, and feel like I would not be being true to myself if I don't express that side of me. I love my wife, and I think once the initial shock wears off, that through an honest and open relationship we can overcome our differences and come to some sort of compromise. I appreciate your words of advice, they are very helpful to me right now. Also, I guess I am not quite ready to change to a generic picture yet. I'm not sure I can get used to seeing someone else's face with my name. I am sort of proud of who I am. If it really bothers my wife "down the road", I will change it.
Lisabeth
Lisabeth,
Hang in their. We are with you.
QuoteI love my wife, and I think once the initial shock wears off, that through an honest and open relationship we can overcome our differences and come to some sort of compromise.
That's the altitude.
Here's a HUG for you sis.
Jillieann
LisaBeth:
Thank you for this post. It sounds like you have crossed another milestone in your life and with your relationship with your wife. All the advise about communication and honesty is good advise. I find it comforting to have a community of sisters who are there for you with support and wisdom based on having already traveled that road. I hope this ends on a positive note for you (however you define that).
I have been thinking alot about coming out to my wife, but quite frankly I am scared to. Your post and the responses have been good for me to read because they give me some real life idea of what to expect when I do reveal Molly to my wife. Like yourself I have made the decision to begin therapy to help me move forward into unchartered territory like coming out to my wife in my case.
Molly
QuoteI have been thinking alot about coming out to my wife, but quite frankly I am scared to.
Hi Molly,
Just something you may want to consider. What will be the consequences of you wife finding out without your telling her.
My experience was not a good one.This link is to a post I made within a very short time of her finding out hope it helps.
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,799.0.html
Shelley
Quote from: molly on December 28, 2005, 11:25:30 AM
I have been thinking alot about coming out to my wife, but quite frankly I am scared to.
Thanks for your post Molly, I hope to hear more from you. You know, even though my wife isn't totally understanding of my desires right now, I am still glad she knows. The telling of our spouses is a significant hurdle to get over. As Shelly said, it is better for you to tell her than for her to find your things and feel like you've been deceitful. I am running into my own problems with deceitfulness. Even though she knew, I had been hiding things like new clothes and makeup. It's just not a good thing for your relationship as I am learning. I have my first appointment with a counselor on Friday who is referring me to a therapist who she says is excellent. She has a lot of experience with transgender issues so I am looking forward to talking with her. I will let everyone know how it goes when I finally meet her. I am hoping my wife will join me on the next visit. I think it can only help to bridge some of the gap between us right now. Maybe we can reach some sort of compromise.
Lisabeth
Glad to hear that you have a session set up with your therapist. I hope it goes well, but do not expect miracles overnight. Good therapy often takes time.
I am convinced that if two people really love one another they can find a compromise.
I had my appointment with the initial counselor today which I thought went very well. I was open and honest about my feelings, and about the objections my wife has as far as exposing the children, as well as going behind her back and then being deceitful about it. I am in agreement with her on those aspects. My wife has agreed to a session alone with the counselor next week, and then we will have a third session with both of us together to see if we can come to some sort of compromise that works for both of us. The counselor is also looking into some other avenues such as support groups in the area. I am hoping everything works out because I really do love my wife, and am hoping that we will grow old together. I guess I just want her to accept all of me, which is difficult for her right now. We just have to take things one day at a time right now. I am hopeful that things will work out.
That is great news about the counselor Lisabeth. It sounds like you are on a positive road. I hope everything works out. Keep the faith hon.
Cassie
Hey there Lisabeth,
It seems as though you are doing OK with the issues you both face, and that you are keeping the communication going both ways. Just remember that this is about you both, and you wanting her to accept "all" of "you" may not be possible or practical. But if growing old together is one of your goals then there will be compromises ahead for you both. My wife and I have been at this for 33 years, and believe me it has taken a lot of work on both our parts to have made our relationship work.
All though we still love each other very much, our relationship has changed, but it changed the way "we" wanted it to change and we have each adapted. One of the issues that will undoubtedly come up is sexual orientation. My wife has made it quite clear that she is not a lesbian, never was, and never will be, so the intimate side of our relationship changed drastically. But the important point is that it changed as we both wanted it to, and that is one of the reasons why we have been able to stay together. Another aspect of our relationship is that we have both agreed the there is the chance that one or both of us will meet someone who will be able to meet our intimate needs and we have both agreed that if this happens we will not stand in the way of the others happiness.
Don't get me wrong, we are not out actively looking for a partner who can satisfy "ALL" our needs, it's just something that we've agreed could happen. Some may find this a little shocking but it has allowed us both to stay together, happy and secure and it works for us. I really hope that everything turns out for you both, keep us posted, and be prepared to work hard.
Steph
Wow Steph,
That is quite a compromise. My wife has shown similar sentiments. She is not a lesbian either. She says she does not want to be with a woman in bed, even if it is me. It just doesn't do anything for her. Things would be so much easier if she was a lesbian, but then she probably wouldn't have been attracted to me in the first place. Sometimes I try to put myself in her shoes, and picture what it would be like for me if she wanted to be a man. I am sure I would feel some of the same things she is feeling. It would be just as hard for me to accept that from her. I think I would try though, although it's easy to say that when you know it's not going to happen. The thing is I am more than willing to spend are intimate moments as a man for her (even though I would prefer them as a woman).
I really liked the counselor that I met with today. I really felt like she genuinely wanted to try to help me experience these desires rather than "cure" me of them. She felt that my wife and I should be able to come to some sort of compromise, where I might have some time to myself each month to explore my desires. This could either include private time in the home, or the opportunity to go to a CD support group that she knows of in the area once a month or so. She is going to look into some options for me. She felt that this could be an opportunity for me to reduce the stress of carrying this weight on my shoulders day in and day out. She wants the opportunity to meet with my wife to explore her feelings, and then will be able to determine if some sort of compromise can be reached. My wife has agreed to meet with her a week from Monday. She emphasized that for the marriage to continue working, there will have to be give and take on both of our parts. I am prepared to give whatever it takes (no pun intended) if I could have that "special time" once in a while. Anyway, I feel like I made a step in the right direction today. Time will tell. Everyone here has been so supportive and I appreciate that. Also, my wife is apparently aware of this site. I am not sure if she has read all my posts, but she has indicated some disapproval, because she asked, "did you tell the therapist that you've been talking about your crossdressing to strangers on the internet?" She says it in such a negative way. Anyway, I don't think you are strangers at all. Even though we will probably never meet face to face, I feel like you are my extended family. You are my sisters (and I don't want to leave out several brothers) who are there for me through the ups and downs. I always look forward to hearing from you all, and lending support to you as well when I can. Thanks again for being there. You are truly a special bunch in my book.
All my love,
Lisabeth
Lizbeth,
Glad to hear that your session with the therapist went well. As far as having some time set aside to express your feminine self, I think this may be a very workable posibility. I basically set aside Friday afternoon and evening to let Louise out of the closet. After work I shower, change into a skirt and do my makeup. My wife expects this and respects my needs. I also usually fix dinner on Fridays, so this gives her something to look forward to as well. I hope that you and your wife can work out some arrangement where you can both be comfortable.
Hi Lizbeth,
It good to hear that you are happy with the therapist.
You said,
QuoteThe thing is I am more than willing to spend are intimate moments as a man for her (even though I would prefer them as a woman).
Today when I was out walking and thinking who I am and what I wanted to do.
I realized as long as I am married, hopefully for the rest of my life, I would GRS because of my love for her. I want to fulfill her needs as best I can. But if something happened and I became single I would have the GRS and become the woman that I am inside. I 'm not happy with just occasionally Cross-Dressing, that's not enough, but I'm becoming a transvesbian much like Debtv. I still have some feelings of hostility with my male exterior and I need to make peace with it.
Hey Debtv I haven't seen a posting from you lately; are you still around?
We have much in common and your encouragement has been of great value to me so much so that I look for your postings. Anyway you are not just a stranger to me but a dear friend and even more a sister.
Hugs
:)
Jillieann
Looks like your headed into the right direction. Most of us are ok with compromises especially since many of us have been doing it our whole life (once sided at least). Its just that now its coming out semi into the open and more known. I think its important you let her and the therapist know just where your boundary is (even extreme boundary) so everyone knows how far you could go (ex how often, where you would do it, and what styles you would do). You might be focused on getting her to accept you, where as the real focus is just getting it out in the open and having private time and space to do it to where you are satisfied.
Hi everyone!
Well it looks like progress is being made after all. My wife and I sat down last night and had a heart to heart talk. She wanted total honesty from me, so in an effort to start the new year without hiding and deceit, and to take steps to more open communication I opened up and showed her Susan's website. I gave her the opportunity to read all of my posts, so there are no more secrets. Some of the posts were pretty personal but I am glad to have everything out in the open. She has read many of your posts as well, and has signed up to talk with other SO's. She is also going to order a book that was recommended to her to try to learn more about CD's. I am so proud of her for trying to understand me. She is truly special, and I am not just saying that because she will be reading this later. She is one in a million. I am feeling very fortunate to have someone like her in my life. Anyway, she will be introducing herself soon, but doesn't want to be pressured into it. (I've only asked her 25 times today.) I'm just excited for you all to meet her. I know you will make her feel welcome. Talk to you soon!
Love
Lisabeth
That is such good news Lisabeth. It takes a lot of courage on both your parts to take the steps that you are, and taking them together will make the road ahead easier. As we've mentioned before, if you want to really stay together then you will have to work together, and it would seem from your post that is exactly what you are doing.
This is a new year, with new beginnings, take advantage of Susan's, and remember that we are always here when you need us.
Steph
Hang in there, Lisabeth!
It has taken my SO and I a long time to get to where we are now, which is, "OK, do what you want at home but don't go outside!" This, of course is not where I'd like to be but, it's progress just the same. It has taken, however, 23 years together and 18 years of marriage to get there. While she knew of my cross dressing before we married she didn't approve and only moved off of that position after I admitted having more serious transgender desires. I think that, in her case, there is a serious "What will people think of me?" consideration. I can relate since it was largely that consideration that kept me in the closet so many years. I've moved past that to a great extent but, I have to be patient. She has more traveling to do before she catches up to me. Of course, there are other concerns as well but I think that this is one of the big ones.
So, be patient! I know that, now that I'm in the process of discovering who I really am, I want to GO! GO! GO! but if I take that route, at that speed, I'll be leaving too many important people behind. It sometimes feels like it's killing me but I have to be patient. I think that people cannot move forward, physically or emotionally, unless they know where they're starting from at first. My SO, and maybe yours as well, has received a piece of information that has caused her world to "slip its moorings' so to speak, so she can't tell where she is anymore let alone where she's going. The old saying is that "time heals all wounds." I think that time, if it will not heal the wound that may have been inflicted, will allow her, at least, to get used to the scar. Therapy will help. That and the other steps you are both taking will surely continue your progess.
You GO Girl!!!
helen
Sound like your moving forward.
I'm happy for you Lizabeth.
:)
Jillieann
Thanks Steph, Helen, and Jillieann,
I guess we just have to take things slow and one day at a time. My wife has been bombarded with quite a lot over the last few days in reading my posts. I can't expect her to be thrilled about it since she really does not want to be with a woman. She really is trying to understand though, and I think you all know how much I appreciate that. She's truly special, and I can't wait for you all to meet her, but that will have to be at her own pace when she is ready. Thanks for being there.
Lisabeth
When I told my partner (when we were getting to know each other) and my family, I would tell them the details honestly and how far I would go (living every day, hormones), just so that there was no mistaking what my intentions were. Then I would try to change the subject back to something I would normally talk about. Its not that I wanted them to hear more, as much as I didnt want them to think the real me which they are learning one more part about, was false all these years in every way. I just want them to know its still the same me, but only one part is different.
Thanks Kendra,
I know what you are saying. I'm still the same person that I have always been, it's just one outside part that is different. I just want some time (private if necessary) to express who I really feel like on the inside. I understand that my wife thinks I am a nutcase, so in private may be the only way. It would mean so much to me if we could share this, but it doesn't appear that that is meant to be. Even though things are completely out in the open, she is not taking it as well as I had hoped. I'm feeling a little down right now about the whole situation, but I am hoping things get better. She has a private appointment with my therapist on Monday, and then we will both have an appointment together sometime next week. Hopefully we can come to some sort of compromise. Thanks again for writing, I appreciate everyone's support.
Lisabeth
Hi Lisabeth,
I think that your wife having a private appointment with your therapist is a tremendous step forward - means she sees Lisabeth as a "problem" affecting both of you and is seeking disinterested advice from a authorative source - I can only see good coming from this, the therapist will be able to answer all your wifes questions & set her mind at rest.
Sadly my wife was not interested in talking to the counsellor I was seeing - she sees it as a problem for me only.
I would love it if rana could appear, I would settle for private - I think I have a deal further to go before I get to your stage, I know you are feeling down, but truely I envy you
Regards
rana
Hi Lisabeth,
Just got back from holidays and saw your post. What a big step forward for you both. I am so glad to see that you have opened up to your wife in this way. I'm sure that giving her access to Susan's and your posts will help provide her with some understanding of the TG spectrum. I too like Rana haven't been able to convince my wife of the benefits.
I hope that your wife does take the opportuntiy to meet us here as the input from the SO's here is so valuable. I think your right as well Lisabeth when you say that she is special. It does sound that she is in fact special as I feel that anyone who can provide us with the support we need without turning their back on us is very special.
Goodluck to both of you on the path to self discovery.
Shelley
Lisabeth,
I had not found this post untill last night. This sheds some light on things between you and Veronica too.
Taking things that don't belong to oneself is not right either. Others no matter the age need to respect someone elses belonging and leave them alone.
It feels though the action is of a parent overseeing a child. But even to some degree a child for the mere fact of being another person, requires respect for their personal pocessions.
Rewarding a person for being able to accomplish something that is hard for them is good. But I don't feel it should be with the very thing they have been able to keep in check. That becomes a backside.
Point and case. You not spending money you don't have for things you want, when other needs require attention first. I would think It better to give yourself an evening in dress be it at home while children are at grandmas or freinds or be it at your favorite party spot. Dress in what you have already buy nothing new for the occassion. Otherwise you are not master over your actions you are slave to them again with permission. Just colored the sky a different color.
I can see how you would want to rebell. I would too, for the mere fact I'm, as you are, an adult and deserve to be treated as one. I treat others as I would want to be treated and would hope that would make a difference. I feel people get farther treating others in that manner. Even a person with some ailment, affliction, or compulssion. This makes them no less human or deserving. How one talks to our mate should always be as an equal not one of superior knowledge and command over them.
These issues need addressed too between you and your spouse in the joint therapy.
Have a great day,
Smiles
Peggiann
hi all,
just thought i would put my feelings into words...
by lying, sneaking around and doing deceitful acts simular to those behaviors
of a child that can not have his way ( ie-purchasing 600 dollars worth of glasses) does
not derserve the credit of adult behavior although lisabeth is getting my objective
attention and after a positive therapy session we will need to make concessions and
limits will have to be set in order to move forward without lies and without deceitful acts!
i am willing to work on making time for lisabeth by honoring the request of time alone
in the house without the kids ( ages 4& 6) so lisabeth can explore and come out.
this is a step forward for me -a BIG step -i can only take small steps at the moment.
lisabeth needs to make " things right" by returning the glasses that was WAY over the
top as far as our buget goes and to me represent a serious message that was sent out
DECEIT!!! new years eve. was what i thought a turning point -total honesty that evening
forward was the message i received -well HELLO what happened here aside from
selfish addictive behaviors without any remorse! i still can not believe-- 3 pairs of designer
glasses!!! i can not trust lisabeth...what will stop lisabeth from more shopping sprees
when the next uncontrollable impulse surfaces? maybe a 12-step program...a very
point the therapist made with the addiction history we have something else going on
here...something bigger than both of us and one of us ( lisabeth ) is in denial!
i love lisabeth and i am willing to work on this together -key word "together"-
that means joint decisions and the key word is communication, without communication
there is no relationship and without trust there is nothing but empty words. words are
meaningless unless you can provide positive actions. quote " i love my wife and will make
this up to here" my question here is how? so far i have only seen more deceit!
i sign this insightfully,
veronica
Hi Lisbeth,
It's really nice to hear that your wife has become understanding, but like the others have said, take it slow and don't rush her into anything. It's one step forward for you though, and I'm really happy for you. :)
Gina
Thanks everyone,
I do think we are making progress again, and on the road to recovery. I think through open communication we can move forward through all of this. I know this is very difficult for Veronica and I know if I push her too hard on this we will be back where we started. I still think it's better that she knows and doesn't really like it, then to be kept in the dark. I want this out in the open with Veronica. I am tired of all the "lies and deceit" as she terms it. Anyway thanks for being there. I really appreciate your support through this difficult time.
Love,
Lisabeth
Lizabeth,
Hug, Hug, Hug. :)
Was worried when you didn't come to Susan's in 6 days and
I knew you had been a regular here.
Glad your back and glad that you are real starting to making some progress in the righ driection (CD plus issues) and see your self on the road to recovery (lies and deceit issues).
Keep posting so we can help.
And remember you can email me anytime.
Your TG Sis,
:)
Jillieann
Hi Lisabeth,
Quotestill think it's better that she knows and doesn't really like it, then to be kept in the dark.
Couldn't agree more. At least the fear of the unknown has passed.
Hope things continue to go well for you both.
Hugs Shelley