Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Male to female transsexual talk (MTF) => Topic started by: April_TO on February 22, 2015, 07:56:06 PM

Title: Male Fail?
Post by: April_TO on February 22, 2015, 07:56:06 PM
Hello Ladies, hope you're all well :)

A quick share, so I went out today and planned not to make any effort to look feminine at all (Hoodie, Boot cut Jeans, Pixie Hair, A bit of Tinted Moisturizer/Bronzer) had a bit of stubble and not even carrying a purse (what an adjustment - I felt incomplete). I started my day by meeting a friend for lunch at a nearby restaurant and was instantly greeted miss by the receptionist (I was surprised). I then saw my friend and we started ordering right away as we're both hangry. I called the waiter and was greeted with hello ladies and what can I get for you ma'am. I'm thinking to myself are people blind or just being polite LOL

Initially, I was not even thinking of using the women's washroom coz in my head I didn't even look feminine so why bother but after the reception I got in the restaurant. I can't risk going inside the men's washroom. It felt good but I brushed it off quickly as I don't want it to get into my head.

After lunch, I went straight to make some errands and ended the day by doing a bit of grocery shopping. It was my turn to pay for my stuff and again I was addressed by "ma'am" and "have a great evening ma'am" with a smile.

Ladies, did I just experience male fail? Did you ever experience something similar where you did not make an effort at all to pass and yet the reaction was the exact opposite. I am curious to know your experience.

Love,

April
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: Sunderland on February 22, 2015, 08:50:52 PM
If you looked even half as passable as you do in your avatar, it doesn't surprise me at all. :)
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: April_TO on February 22, 2015, 09:05:15 PM
Thanks Sunderland :) I'm just hitting my 6th month on HRT by end of this month and I don't know what I did differently today but I guess hormones really makes an impact in our overall appearance.

I was even contemplating of ending my transition as I think I am not progressing as I still see a man for most of the time. Well I may just have to reconsider hehe.

Love,

April

Quote from: Sunderland on February 22, 2015, 08:50:52 PM
If you looked even half as passable as you do in your avatar, it doesn't surprise me at all. :)
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: Sunderland on February 22, 2015, 09:10:53 PM
Still seeing a man?! Sweetie, my first reaction to seeing your avatar was, "Wow, she's so pretty!"

Don't be so hard on yourself. You're definitely progressing. It's only old perceptions and fears holding you back.

*hugs* :)
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: April_TO on February 22, 2015, 09:22:35 PM
I truly appreciate your generosity and kindness Sunderland.

Thank you :) It was indeed a great feeling. I just need to up my confidence a bit.

xoxo

April

Quote from: Sunderland on February 22, 2015, 09:10:53 PM
Still seeing a man?! Sweetie, my first reaction to seeing your avatar was, "Wow, she's so pretty!"

Don't be so hard on yourself. You're definitely progressing. It's only old perceptions and fears holding you back.

*hugs* :)
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: Ms Grace on February 22, 2015, 09:24:09 PM
Sounds like a massive male fail! If you're only at six months you really have nothing to worry about. :)
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: Alana_Jane on February 22, 2015, 09:25:56 PM
I agree April.  I hope I look as good as you do after 6 months on HRT.  I bet all the "Sir" comments are behind you, unless the person's a complete jerk and does it out of transphobic spite. 

As they say in the valley, Male fail fur-sure!

-Alana
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: April_TO on February 22, 2015, 09:31:59 PM
Thanks Ms. Grace xoxo
Congrats again on your milestone :)

Quote from: Ms Grace on February 22, 2015, 09:24:09 PM
Sounds like a massive male fail! If you're only at six months you really have nothing to worry about. :)
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: April_TO on February 22, 2015, 09:33:07 PM
You are already beautiful inside out my lovely friend.
It sure is a big FAIL that I love to have in my life right now LOL

Big Hugs,

April

Quote from: Alana_Jane on February 22, 2015, 09:25:56 PM
I agree April.  I hope I look as good as you do after 6 months on HRT.  I bet all the "Sir" comments are behind you, unless the person's a complete jerk and does it out of transphobic spite. 

As they say in the valley, Male fail fur-sure!

-Alana
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: Eva Marie on February 22, 2015, 10:35:32 PM
Why yes I did lol... Had to run to the post office one day and just threw on whatever was lying on top of the dirty clothes pile and threw on a cap and no bra (big mistake) - I was in a hurry and was super grubby looking. After I left the post office I decided I was hungry and stopped off for a burger. When I was leaving a female employee told me "thank you mam"  probably because it was cool outside and because of the missing bra and the thin tshirt I had on lol.. It was then that I knew it was time to go full time.
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: Anna R on February 23, 2015, 12:51:21 AM
Quote from: Eva Marie on February 22, 2015, 10:35:32 PM
Why yes I did lol... Had to run to the post office one day and just threw on whatever was lying on top of the dirty clothes pile and threw on a cap and no bra (big mistake) - I was in a hurry and was super grubby looking. After I left the post office I decided I was hungry and stopped off for a burger. When I was leaving a female employee told me "thank you mam"  probably because it was cool outside and because of the missing bra and the thin tshirt I had on lol.. It was then that I knew it was time to go full time.

Basically if a man see's boobs then it's female,  it is just conditioning although if you look as good as most here  then why not say " Miss" ?
Anna


Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: LizMarie on February 23, 2015, 02:55:07 AM
What you described is a perfect case of "male fail". Congratulations!

It sounds like it's time to do your IDs and just move across the line. :)
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: rachel89 on February 23, 2015, 03:01:46 AM
most definitely at male fail girl, from your profile pic, you look like a cis woman.
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: Paula L on February 23, 2015, 04:40:17 AM
Thats great carmenkate   people see you as the woman you are!
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: katrinaw on February 23, 2015, 07:53:43 AM
April, you are so "passable" your face, skin texture and confidence just leap out of your avatar's ...

However always nice to get a complement especially if you feel a bit dowdy about yourself  8)

Hugs

Katy  :-*
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: Ellesmira the Duck on February 23, 2015, 08:17:58 AM
I think I looked pretty deceptively andro either way, and I mostly just wore baggier clothes in guy more and girl clothes with my hair nicer. But I was impatient and went full time after 3 months time after a bit over three months on hormones. Honestly looking back I wonder how I ever passed in those pictures but I just couldn't wait, so I skipped the male fail stage, though I'd probably encounter that now as long as I kept shaved. And yes, judging from your avatar I can't see any bit of male in your face.
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: Sabrina on February 23, 2015, 08:46:48 AM
I'm still waiting for that to happen.
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: ElizMarie on February 23, 2015, 10:23:28 AM
April, even though you might not see it, the rest of us see you as having a face that's become progressively more and more feminine.  I've kind of wondered for a while why you haven't had a case of "male fail" before now.  But it's obvious (with more than one incident in one day) that you're there!  Congratulations! 
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: ImagineKate on February 23, 2015, 12:49:20 PM

Quote from: carmenkate on February 22, 2015, 09:05:15 PM
Thanks Sunderland :) I'm just hitting my 6th month on HRT by end of this month and I don't know what I did differently today but I guess hormones really makes an impact in our overall appearance.

I was even contemplating of ending my transition as I think I am not progressing as I still see a man for most of the time. Well I may just have to reconsider hehe.

Love,

April

Ending what???


April, you're beautiful...

But I myself have had these moments.

I just had an incident at NJ DMV, got "clocked" but it was kinda funny.
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: lilacwoman on February 23, 2015, 01:47:02 PM
6months on hormones has got to make big differences to everything but its so slow that we sometimes don't realise as we still see the old us in our mirrors ...but new people only see the new us.

Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: ImagineKate on February 23, 2015, 01:48:28 PM
I agree. I was also told that 6 months is usually the tipping point.
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: Sammy on February 23, 2015, 01:51:23 PM
Quote from: ImagineKate on February 23, 2015, 01:48:28 PM
I agree. I was also told that 6 months is usually the tipping point.

It actually depends quite heavily on age, genetics and other variables.
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: CynthiaAnn on February 23, 2015, 01:55:41 PM
3 and half years of HRT here, I was lazy one night, went to the mall with my soul mate, no makeup, no purse, black hoodie, jeans, beanie cap. It was very telling, was not even trying and being properly recognized, that's mail fail. Not enough signals to support my previous existence.

C -
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: Alana_Jane on February 23, 2015, 10:01:04 PM
Quote from: carmenkate on February 22, 2015, 09:33:07 PM
You are already beautiful inside out my lovely friend.
It sure is a big FAIL that I love to have in my life right now LOL

Big Hugs,

April

Oh, thank you April!  You'll never know how much I appreciate you kind thoughts.
Love you,

-Alana
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: Eva Marie on February 23, 2015, 10:35:54 PM
Quote from: ElizMarie on February 23, 2015, 10:23:28 AM
April, even though you might not see it, the rest of us see you as having a face that's become progressively more and more feminine.

Absolutely. I have also had the same thoughts about your avatar pic - it just keeps getting more girly :) And only 6 months on HRT? Wow..... stunning.
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: JenJen2011 on February 24, 2015, 02:08:43 AM
Yes. There comes a point where you just pass unknowingly even if you think you look like a man. I'm happy you experienced that great experience. I bet it made your day.
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: April_TO on February 24, 2015, 08:39:48 AM
Thanks so much Eva Marie xoxo
Big Hugs,

April

Quote from: Eva Marie on February 23, 2015, 10:35:54 PM
Absolutely. I have also had the same thoughts about your avatar pic - it just keeps getting more girly :) And only 6 months on HRT? Wow..... stunning.
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: April_TO on February 24, 2015, 08:40:14 AM
Thanks JenJen2011 :)
big hugs,

April

Quote from: JenJen2011 on February 24, 2015, 02:08:43 AM
Yes. There comes a point where you just pass unknowingly even if you think you look like a man. I'm happy you experienced that great experience. I bet it made your day.
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: April_TO on February 24, 2015, 08:40:56 AM
Thanks Liz Marie xo stay pretty!
April

Quote from: LizMarie on February 23, 2015, 02:55:07 AM
What you described is a perfect case of "male fail". Congratulations!

It sounds like it's time to do your IDs and just move across the line. :)
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: April_TO on February 24, 2015, 08:41:45 AM
Thank you Rachel89 - you have so much potential.
I saw your pic from your other post. Stay beautiful.

xo

April

Quote from: rachel89 on February 23, 2015, 03:01:46 AM
most definitely at male fail girl, from your profile pic, you look like a cis woman.
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: April_TO on February 24, 2015, 08:42:31 AM
Thanks Paula - you are glowing in your avatar pic xoxo

April


Quote from: Paula L on February 23, 2015, 04:40:17 AM
Thats great carmenkate   people see you as the woman you are!
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: April_TO on February 24, 2015, 08:43:25 AM
Katrina,

You are such a lady. Gracious and beautiful.

xo

April

Quote from: katrinaw on February 23, 2015, 07:53:43 AM
April, you are so "passable" your face, skin texture and confidence just leap out of your avatar's ...

However always nice to get a complement especially if you feel a bit dowdy about yourself  8)

Hugs

Katy  :-*
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: April_TO on February 24, 2015, 08:44:06 AM
ElizMarie,

Thanks so much beauty. xoxo

April


Quote from: ElizMarie on February 23, 2015, 10:23:28 AM
April, even though you might not see it, the rest of us see you as having a face that's become progressively more and more feminine.  I've kind of wondered for a while why you haven't had a case of "male fail" before now.  But it's obvious (with more than one incident in one day) that you're there!  Congratulations!
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: April_TO on February 24, 2015, 08:44:51 AM
Thanks so much Kate - from your #1 fan

April


Quote from: ImagineKate on February 23, 2015, 12:49:20 PM
Ending what???


April, you're beautiful...

But I myself have had these moments.

I just had an incident at NJ DMV, got "clocked" but it was kinda funny.
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: April_TO on February 24, 2015, 08:45:32 AM
I agree with you Lilacwoman :)
Stay beautiful

April


Quote from: lilacwoman on February 23, 2015, 01:47:02 PM
6months on hormones has got to make big differences to everything but its so slow that we sometimes don't realise as we still see the old us in our mirrors ...but new people only see the new us.
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: Mariah on February 24, 2015, 08:57:35 AM
Sorry that I'm late to the party, but I have a had a lot on my plate. Congrats on your huge mail fail. I'm not a bit surprised by it and your pics on here are you huge proof of that. They really do show the beautiful woman you are.
Mariah
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: April_TO on February 24, 2015, 09:26:06 AM
Thanks Mariah xoxo
Stay pretty!

April


Quote from: Mariah2014 on February 24, 2015, 08:57:35 AM
Sorry that I'm late to the party, but I have a had a lot on my plate. Congrats on your huge mail fail. I'm not a bit surprised by it and your pics on here are you huge proof of that. They really do show the beautiful woman you are.
Mariah
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: Zoetrope on March 24, 2015, 04:42:07 AM
I had my first on the weekend. It was almost comedy.

Without makeup, *I think* I am obviously male. I still have a deep blue beard shadow which seems to be laser resistant.

So, I was out in boy band mode because I felt like giving my skin a break.

At one point I went to the mens' at the bus station to wash my face and hands.

While I was over the sink a guy entered the toilets.

He announced 'Oh ... sorry!, then darted back out of the room.

There was a potent pause at the door, as the poor fellow realised he did indeed have the mens room.

He came back in and headed straight for a closed cubicle.
Title: Re: Male Fail?
Post by: Sammy on March 24, 2015, 12:24:57 PM
Quote from: SarahBoo on March 24, 2015, 04:42:07 AM
I had my first on the weekend. It was almost comedy.

Without makeup, *I think* I am obviously male. I still have a deep blue beard shadow which seems to be laser resistant.

So, I was out in boy band mode because I felt like giving my skin a break.

At one point I went to the mens' at the bus station to wash my face and hands.

While I was over the sink a guy entered the toilets.

He announced 'Oh ... sorry!, then darted back out of the room.

There was a potent pause at the door, as the poor fellow realised he did indeed have the mens room.

He came back in and headed straight for a closed cubicle.

Ahh, restroom male fails are the most hilarious (got my first one in male restroom as well, except we met face to face when I was trying to leave, he looked very confused, glanced at me then at the door sign and by that time I was already gone :D).