I have a friend who is trans, he considers himself non binary. Prefers masculine pronouns, and sometimes wants to dress feminine. He was the stage manager during a school play and had to interact with everyone. Especially people outside of the school the audio engineer was highly transphobic. He constantly called my friend an "it" for weeks. I only learned this the day of the actual play. And during the day of the play the audio engineers friends went up to him and said "hello beautiful". I'm not sure if they were paid or not. But this is like a high class hate crime offense isn't it? He told me he doesn't want to do anything about it. But I know it's bothering him a lot. I told him I have a lawyers number if he changes his mind. I'm friends with the drama teacher. A lot of the drama kids were appalled this even happened. But no one wanted to say anything until the play was over in fear of losing the audio guy. Should I speak to the teacher? I dont want to push my friend into anything but I feel like the school should of taken action for this. It's technically sexual harassment with what the one guy said, isn't it? Any advice??
Whilst you are obviously offended by the way your friend has been treated I'm afraid it's up to him to decide on what action needs to be taken (if any), some people just don't like confrontation, some people don't have the strength to take on such a battle.
Support your friend whilst respecting his wishes.
Tell him you're there to support him whatever he decides, it's all a gooid friend can really do.
If you encounter the person who caused the offence and they offend you then go for the jugular if you feel like it (I'm talking about a metaphorical jugular here).
While I agree with Jayne, surely the school should do something??
Yes it definately up to him whether to pursue this or not. But good for you for standing by him and giving him support!
Why isn't the school doing anything, do they know about it?
Differing opinion here. If it made YOU uncomfortable, you can complain on your own on behalf. It doesn't have to do with the way your friend identifies, but with how one of the students at your school was treated that made you uncomfortable. You can turn this into your issue and leave friend out of it, for the most part.
Just my opinion,
Chris
Nice point of view Chris.
As I was typing it was niggling away at me that a person shouldn't get away with this kind of attitude but my overriding concern was that the friends wishes be respected, I'm an old duffer and in my day anyone but the person who the offense was aimed at would have been told it wasn't up to therm to complain.
I just dont want to make it an issue on him since I know right now he doesn't want to do anything. It's just, things like this is something we are suppose to be fighting for. And for someone with their own business to act like this, in front of a student body, is highly uncalled for and unprofessional. I dont want to make him uncomfortable if I brought anything up to an authority figure.
it does not have to be about him, you found it insulting and that is enough, I would try to seek options for audio people in your area and approach the school with a concern and a solution on your behalf. perhaps they may listen if they do not have to reasearch a solution
Jerri
Schools are apathetic to everything except their funds. I was bullied for years upon years, and nobody I talked to about it (save for my friends) gave a flying rat's behind about it.
Quote from: Jayne on March 02, 2015, 04:11:30 PM
Whilst you are obviously offended by the way your friend has been treated I'm afraid it's up to him to decide on what action needs to be taken (if any), some people just don't like confrontation, some people don't have the strength to take on such a battle.
Support your friend whilst respecting his wishes.
Tell him you're there to support him whatever he decides, it's all a gooid friend can really do.
If you encounter the person who caused the offence and they offend you then go for the jugular if you feel like it (I'm talking about a metaphorical jugular here).
That's very sound advice. He was there working and obviously didn't want to cause any issue whilst he was there. For fear of retribution, more harassment and bullying. However, I would say that those calling him 'it' would have been in smaller numbers and other people, stronger or louder, should of spoken up, if they knew what was happening, and given him a backing and support. In this day and age to still have these bigots walking around and breeding is quite sad. But when we look the other way, ignore the issue and refuse to intervene to help out our fellow being, is that what's really sad about this?
I hope you don't take my comment as being narky or overly opinionated, but I hate when people stand by while someone is abused and assaulted. I especially hate when people film it.