Well I finally got the courage to pick up the phone and call my sister last night. I am just so totally amazed at the disparity between the build up I had allowed this act to get in my head, and her response. She was quiet for only about 15 seconds as the words sunk in, then came back with total support, saying "I love you no matter how you are." The words did not hold the 'I'm only saying this' edge, but rather were soft and caring. I gave a condensed history and how it played out toward my present situation and the conversation was pleasant. She is my only sibling and is nine years older than me. This was part of my hesitation, her high school graduation date was 1960 so I was not sure how growing up in that era would color her acceptance. It did not at all :). Near the end of the phone call she said "This is the first time I've ever heard your voice sound happy."
I almost did not want to post this because I know there are many who have not been fortuneate in this respect, and did not want to hurt any feelings. What tipped my decision was the need to let others know my fear, the level of its unreasonableness, and how good love feels. Dani
Letting go of our fears and facing them is liberating isn't it? ;D
Congrats on having such a loving and caring sister!
I am very pleased for you Dani,
I know for me so many issues I evalute in my mind have a very different out come once I put the action to the thought.
It is wonderful to find love and acceptance in a challenging world
peace sister
Jerri
I'm still worrying about that conversation, myself. My sister is 12 years older and was more like another mother to me. She's also my last living close relative. Big worry for me. There were only three people whose reactions I cared about. She's the last I have to talk to.
Anyway, all of that is just to say don't worry too much about how everyone will react. People with bad experiences need to see it isn't always bad and people like me need the hope that only seeing it go right can provide.
Quote from: Newgirl Dani on April 14, 2015, 09:37:49 AM
her high school graduation date was 1960 so I was not sure how growing up in that era would color her acceptance.
Well, people did eat a lot of LSD and such things back then, and it did have a profund effect on that generation ...
anyway, happy for you. :)
Quote from: mmmmm on April 14, 2015, 10:24:51 AM
Well, people did eat a lot of LSD and such things back then, and it did have a profund effect on that generation ...
anyway, happy for you. :)
mmmmm, I just had to say how much your reply caused me to smile....then chuckle.......then laughed, not in any way whatsoever a negative way, just that mental pic of my sister taking acid :laugh:. She was about 14 years before the LSD thing really taking hold. I know it sounds kinda weird, but I look on her as in a different generation as me, hers being exclusively alcohol, the beer drinking "fonzie era."
Me on the other hand............well I swear I still have little pieces of acid stored "somewhere" in my brain that dissolve, because once in awhile I get "trails" (you'll have to ask about that ;D) I think I ate enough of that to get an army lost. Such a long long time since I've really thought about LSD, except of coarse my happy little trails.
And thanks for the "happy for you" :)
Quote from: Dee Walker on April 14, 2015, 10:23:52 AM
My sister is 12 years older and was more like another mother to me. She's also my last living close relative. Big worry for me.
Same for me, my sister is my one and only family.
Quote from: Jessie Ann on April 14, 2015, 09:57:22 AM
Letting go of our fears and facing them is liberating isn't it? ;D
Congrats on having such a loving and caring sister!
Yes it is and thanks so much :)
Quote from: Jerri on April 14, 2015, 10:14:57 AM
I am very pleased for you Dani,
I know for me so many issues I evalute in my mind have a very different out come once I put the action to the thought.
It is wonderful to find love and acceptance in a challenging world
peace sister
Jerri
Very Nice, thank you.
Thanks to all, I hear my garden calling ;D. Dani
Fashionably late permy usual, but congrats and I am so glad you got to talk with her. :D I hope you can have a wonderful relationship as sisters now that she knows, I bet you will! Happy gardening, weather is nice here too ha ha!
hugs and glad things worked out well for you. When I read this I was like darn, sisters are awesome! To share... when I first realized, really finalized that I was transgender I called my sister and told her and she was totally accepting but concerned. She said to me that no matter what she loves me and it doesn't matter my gender inside or out. very cool.
We talked about my marriage situation, as she is my closest person to go to when I'm having any struggles.
Dani thanks for the share, I had shared a post on here where I had declared "coming out victory" to my wife, only to have it implode a few days later. I was embarrassed and quite frankly felt I had blown my trumpet falsely and not so humbly. but I do agree its good to share success stories :), warmth, and love.
to be totally honest I am so sorry that my older sister passed before she met me, I still drive her jeep and I know she is with me, we had so many crazy trips together. both in this world and the next, we grew up in the 60's. I m so happy that you have had the chance to share you with her, it must be an amazing experience let it grow and enjoy all it can bring both of you. our peace is so impacted by who we are, I had no idea until i accepted me. I am so very pleased that you are finding peace in your life. you are a wonderful person let her shine and live proud and without anger
sorry i missed tonight i am repairing a defrost system so i can drive
xo jerri
My sister is my total ally. At a family gathering not long after I came out somebody was bad mouthing me and my sister simply said, 'Are you talking about my sister?' and there was sudden silence.
That's wonderful that things went so well with your own sister Dani. Yeah, sisters are forever :D
Congrats Dani, what a wonderful sister you have... happy for you :-*
I believe hearing happy stories is uplifting IMHO, and I maybe one of those not so lucky ones soon, so please don't stop!
L Katy :-*