I was at Wal-Mart today after work and there were 4 transgender girls shopping together. They were awesome, they drew some attention from dome shoppers but didn't let it bother them. The part that I thought was awful was the employees at Wal-Mart were rude. They literally followed the girls out of bc the store and were pointing and calling other employees over. I couldn't believe my eyes and management didn't say a thing. The humorous part was that both the Cis Wal-Mart employees were both over six foot tall and pushing 300 pounds so they should have been the last people to talk about anyone being different. The great part about it was the girls didn't let a couple of jerks ruin their shopping trip. They were having a blast. I hope some day to have that much confidence in myself. I should have complained myself to the store manager.
It's something that I noticed when I used to get catcalled and insulted on the street was that more often than not the person throwing the insults had suffered a bad beating from an ugly stick.
Quote from: toniwest on May 03, 2015, 07:19:17 PM
I should have complained myself to the store manager.
You still can - write a letter, send it to the manager stating the day and time (if you saw the names of the ringleaders all the better) and describe their behaviour. CC it to any sympathetic media outlets and the CEO of Wal-Mart. See how much they're laughing then!
I saved the receipt with time and store number in it. I should have taking video of the employees. The plus side is near check out there are a ton of store surveillance cameras. I mentioned in another post about wanting to go to law school and it is because of stuff like this. I bet with media attention and a letter from a law firm they would be more sensitive to their customers diversity
I've experienced the exact opposite at my Walmart. They've been interested in me and have complimented me.
I must say that I am quite shocked that this happened as well. I have been working for Wal-Mart in mid-level management for 6 years now and have never seen anything like what you are describing. One of Wal-Mart's core principles is Respect for the Individual and the company I
has specific policies that protect transgender employees.
I have been living full time since October and the company has been extremely supportive of my transition. In fact, in all of the time since I have only had two negative experiences regarding my transition and they were involving customers who were intoxicated or not in their right mind.
Speaking as a manager for Wal-Mart, I would encourage you to call the store manager and let them know what you witnessed so that the situation can be addressed. What you saw is definitely not a part of Wal-Mart culture and is something that any manager would be certain to correct if they were made aware of it.
Complain via the website. It goes to HQ in Arkansas and they are responsive. They've responded to me the time I had to complain (it was about sales tax that the store was improperly collecting.)
I have never had any issue at Walmart whatsoever and I even get my HRT scrips filled there. I go full femme and they know my male name and nobody really seems to care.
Quote from: awilliams1701 on May 03, 2015, 08:05:36 PM
I've experienced the exact opposite at my Walmart. They've been interested in me and have complimented me.
Same here. I live in an older, very conservative smaller community in a suburb of L.A. and there are very few trans people here. I have dealt extensively with the Walmart pharmacy and we have gone through the rigamarole of me looking female while picking up prescriptions in <male name> (thus having to out myself each time) and getting my name changed after the court order was in hand and the only people that have acted even a little bit negative toward me were customers (staring at me in my early transition days). The employees have been nothing but courteous and professional, and have even asked questions about my journey.
I'd definitely give Walmart HQ a call about this; it is out of character for an associate to do something like this.
The types of people who end up on PeopleofWalmart.com (often 300+lbs, almost totally neglect personal appearance, and have a terrible fashion sense, and frequently act like idiots) are like really the last ones who should be pointing and laughing at T-girls.
this is something that can vary drastically between different stores, and sometimes between different shifts at the same store. it all depends on who it there. they should however have respect for the individual. which we have had quite a few employees lose their jobs over. alot of people think that if their complaint is filed it just goes to the trash, but it doesnt. it gets listened to and if the management at that store is worth anything, they will deal with it appropriately.
Quote from: rachel89 on May 08, 2015, 12:34:44 PM
The types of people who end up on PeopleofWalmart.com (often 300+lbs, almost totally neglect personal appearance, and have a terrible fashion sense, and frequently act like idiots) are like really the last ones who should be pointing and laughing at T-girls.
Can we not dump on people for how they look? If we do that, we're no better than the people the OP is complaining about.
From what I've heard, that website is mostly about making fun of how the people shown there look. (And based on that reputation, I'm unwilling to go there and give the site additional clicks.) Given that many of us get dumped on for how we look, I would have thought we'd have a little more compassion than that....
(I think the name of the site is classist -- a lot of people don't have any alternative to Wal-Mart, either because they're poor or because there simply isn't anything else in their area.)
Quote from: Asche on May 09, 2015, 07:55:12 AM
Can we not dump on people for how they look?
I will second this.
Quote from: Ms Grace on May 09, 2015, 08:01:58 AM
I will second this.
I will third this - not because I care even slightly about the feelings of such horrible people, but because I don't like the insinuation that it would somehow be *more* acceptable for an attractive cisgender person to mock a transgender person's appearance. We are not inherently less attractive as the general population at all.
Moving on to Wal-Mart, I'm not surprised that this happened, and I do hope the OP reports it to the manager and corporate. I don't shop at Wal-Mart for other political reasons, but it definitely shouldn't be happening anywhere. Good for the ladies who didn't let it ruin their experience!
I really don't like to criticize people for their appearance. I'm not the prettiest person in the world either and everyone is beautiful in some way:
sorry.
I was being a little to snarky and I crossed the line. I hope you will accept my apology.
I am kind of looking for some forgiveness here. there were a lot things wrong with what I said. if I could get some responses to my apology, it would be nice.
*hugs*
We all make mistakes, Rachel. The thing to do is just what you've done...apologize, learn, and press on.
:)
Where I live, there are two Wal-Marts within three miles of each other...and the vibe I get from them are totally opposite:
The first one is very...snooty, if that word can be used with WM. The employees will help, but their body language says you're imposing on their time. The customers are generally cold and humorless. There is a Subway that has a most peculiar odor coming from the bread ovens; not like a stand-alone Subway (which has a delicious fragrance of freshly baked bread), and it's been that way since it opened. I did mention it to both stores, but it's still the same.
The newer one is very friendly and one gets the impression that the employees are happy to see you, and eager to help (I had one person come up 3 times in 15 minutes; we were just browsing, but he kept asking in such a nice way...) Several times we've gone dancing in the aisles (when not crowded) and had customers join us briefly.
So I'd say it depends on which store (and probably which shift) one experiences. There's good and bad everywhere. (Even at Macy's LOL)
I live in semi-rural Indiana (the type of place where the film "Boys Don't Cry" is kind of a horror movie for trans* people) I was lashing out against the local culture, but I also see that I went way too far and forgot that were people here who had feelings I could hurt.
I sounds as though this particular Walmart was acting on its own and perhaps is not true of all their stores. Part of whether transgenders get picked out probably depends on whether or not there is still something that allows the employees to recognize someone as transgender.
Calling the manager is not a bad idea. Even if you don't plan on doing this, a threat to go to the media is often enough to turn a store around. If this store is in a rural area and the only Walmart around, bad press would definately scare them.
I'm sorry you had to go through that. No matter what someone looks like, they should not be singled out or made fun of, which, in my mind includes groups pointing at an individual. i child i could overlook, but not a teen or adult.
sam1234
Quote from: sam1234 on May 14, 2015, 11:53:30 PM
I sounds as though this particular Walmart was acting on its own and perhaps is not true of all their stores. Part of whether transgenders get picked out probably depends on whether or not there is still something that allows the employees to recognize someone as transgender.
Calling the manager is not a bad idea. Even if you don't plan on doing this, a threat to go to the media is often enough to turn a store around. If this store is in a rural area and the only Walmart around, bad press would definately scare them.
I'm sorry you had to go through that. No matter what someone looks like, they should not be singled out or made fun of, which, in my mind includes groups pointing at an individual. i child i could overlook, but not a teen or adult.
sam1234
I disagree. The entire responsibility for picking out/picking on transgender people is on the pickers themselves, not who we are or what we look like.
We are human, after all. We deserve politeness and civil behavior on that status alone.
Quote from: sam1234 on May 14, 2015, 11:53:30 PM
Part of whether transgenders get picked out probably depends on whether or not there is still something that allows the employees to recognize someone as transgender.
I'm not sure what the point of this sentence is.
Whether someone is seen as transgender is for the most part not in their control, it's in the control of the perceiver. Even cis people sometimes get "clocked" as trans.
And whether someone passes or not shouldn't matter. I well understand trans people's desire to not catch all the @#$% that gets thrown at people who are perceived to be trans. But IMHO, our point should be that people should not be harrassed for what they look like, whether that's trans, goth, fashion "crimes", or being considered "bad looking." That's called
civilization.
Quote from: rachel89 on May 14, 2015, 09:27:44 PM
I am kind of looking for some forgiveness here. there were a lot things wrong with what I said. if I could get some responses to my apology, it would be nice.
I gave you my forgiveness yesterday in the form of a positive reputation point. Apologies are the lubricant of life!
Hugs, Devlyn
No worries. Sometimes we can all get that way. I'm glad you took the time to apologize though. It shows how wonderful of a person you are. Hugs
Mariah
Quote from: rachel89 on May 14, 2015, 09:27:44 PM
I am kind of looking for some forgiveness here. there were a lot things wrong with what I said. if I could get some responses to my apology, it would be nice.
I had an occurance in 2012 at a thrift store (famous one) and I was shopping for clothes with a voucher from a charity, they at first wanted to deny me...saying the clothes I had were for women. I had to spend 5 minutes explaining that I was transgender just to get the clothes. They did at least apologize at the end of the sale.
Quote from: rachel89 on May 14, 2015, 08:05:48 PM
I was being a little to snarky and I crossed the line. I hope you will accept my apology.
No worries.
Quote from: Shawn Sunshine on May 15, 2015, 11:53:31 AM
I had an occurance in 2012 at a thrift store (famous one) and I was shopping for clothes with a voucher from a charity, they at first wanted to deny me...saying the clothes I had were for women. I had to spend 5 minutes explaining that I was transgender just to get the clothes. They did at least apologize at the end of the sale.
Really? Is being female even a requirement to buy women's clothes? Good god almighty.
No kidding. Is a man not allowed to buy clothes for his wife or girls? There are plenty of non-LGBT reasons as to why that is completely stupid.
Quote from: iKate on May 15, 2015, 02:14:30 PM
Really? Is being female even a requirement to buy women's clothes? Good god almighty.
Shawn had a voucher. That adds a level of complication. Vouchers have to be used by the person they're issued for. If that person is a minor they can reasonably expect the minor to be present. They want to avoid someone selling the voucher (food stamps, whatever) for cash and buying something else.
well i proved I was the one with the voucher. I should add that she looked at me and plainly said "you don't look like a woman to me" but that was a while ago.
My experiences at Walmart have been good ones so far, but to be fair they did think I was buying for a girlfriend or another woman etc. But sometimes I just tell them upfront, especially If I see that the person (usually a young woman) is being nice to me, I can pick up on clues that she realizes its for me and that she totally understands.
I'm all for forgiveness
Quote from: Shawn Sunshine on May 15, 2015, 04:26:48 PM
My experiences at Walmart have been good ones so far, but to be fair they did think I was buying for a girlfriend or another woman etc. But sometimes I just tell them upfront, especially If I see that the person (usually a young woman) is being nice to me, I can pick up on clues that she realizes its for me and that she totally understands.
Well, they don't a ask, I don't tell. I presented male many times buying women's clothing at Walmart. Nobody has said anything other than the usual chatter I get from the cashiers about how their day is so busy etc. No big deal at all.
I was buying a pair of high heeled half boots last spring at DSW and had a really nice conversation with the cashier, an older lady. I was in male drag and she had no doubt whatsoever that they were for me. It was one of the most pleasant shopping experiences I've ever had, AND they were only $25,, down from $70!
I actually purchased my first women's clothing items from Wal-Mart. I was really self-conscious at the time and think I got stares from customers, but no problems with employees. my best experiences were at H&M, where one of the employees is really helpful (and finds trans people fascinating, but not in a creepy way) while my worst was at Goodwill, where another customer said he would beat the sh*t out of me if no one was watching.
Quote from: rachel89 on May 15, 2015, 11:04:25 PM
I actually purchased my first women's clothing items from Wal-Mart. I was really self-conscious at the time and think I got stares from customers, but no problems with employees. my best experiences were at H&M, where one of the employees is really helpful (and finds trans people fascinating, but not in a creepy way) while my worst was at Goodwill, where another customer said he would beat the sh*t out of me if no one was watching.
Wow! That is just mind blowing.
Nobody says anything to me when shopping except sometimes at kohls elderly ladies would try small talk.
Quote from: stephaniec on May 15, 2015, 04:44:46 PM
I'm all for forgiveness
My experience tells that the average education level of Wal-mart employee is very low, and their salary is also very low. They are actually poor people. What can I expect from them?
Of course there are many nice employees there, but the chance is that you can face that kind of incident there in Wal-mart at any time.
Here in my country, those employees at such a big store chain get intensive education regarding customer care, and always are ready to first say like "I apologize" whenever a customer comes to complain.
Cheap goods and cheap people have made Wal-mart prosperous.
barbie~~
Quote from: barbie on May 16, 2015, 04:52:27 PM
My experience tells that the average education level of Wal-mart employee is very low, and their salary is also very low. They are actually poor people. What can I expect from them?
Of course there are many nice employees there, but the chance is that you can face that kind of incident there in Wal-mart at any time.
Here in my country, those employees at such a big store chain get intensive education regarding customer care, and always are ready to first say like "I apologize" whenever a customer comes to complain.
Cheap goods and cheap people have made Wal-mart prosperous.
barbie~~
When my mom worked at walmart she got $12 an hour. She also has a nursing degree. The associates aren't all rocket scientists but a lot of them are educated and the wages are about right for big box retail stores.
I get picked at a lot but I think its funny actually. I'm 18 now and a senior. Many people in my class make fun of me, or try to make fun of me. I think its funny because we are 18 now and technically, by most laws, adults. Yet you revert back to name-calling, finger pointing, and noise making? I chuckle, shake me head, and think "Immaturity at its best. Great job bhs!" (hey that rhymes!)
So yeah, its sad but funny to me. Grown adults especially are both fun AND sad. Grown and making fun of a teenager? Yeah, that's the positive image you should be giving the little ones. Smart...
Quote from: rachel89 on May 15, 2015, 11:04:25 PM
I actually purchased my first women's clothing items from Wal-Mart. I was really self-conscious at the time and think I got stares from customers, but no problems with employees. my best experiences were at H&M, where one of the employees is really helpful (and finds trans people fascinating, but not in a creepy way) while my worst was at Goodwill, where another customer said he would beat the sh*t out of me if no one was watching.
That is just plain awful and I'm really sorry that you had to suffer an experience like that.
I buy all my clothing at church goodwill and thrift shops because of my vows and I've never had anybody say anything to me or pass an off comment. Having worked for the adult mental health service as a social worker I know very well that folk with mental illness and refugees from other countries get threatened and mishandled by violent bigoted people too. I cannot even begin to understand why anyone would want to do such hateful things.
As far as the Goodwill experience, everyone else in the store was fine, I was just unlucky enough to encounter a raging trans-phobe. I'm guessing that guy has some major anger issues and possibly a rap sheet too (or maybe he's a closet case or something). It wasn't really Goodwill's fault. sometimes my fear of violent transphobia gets blown way out of proportion, but its not just a figment of my imagination either. I would still go back to goodwill though.
He kind of looked like a skin-head or something, but I didn't really want to hang around and get a closer look at his tatoos.
Quote from: iKate on May 16, 2015, 06:50:20 PM
When my mom worked at walmart she got $12 an hour. She also has a nursing degree. The associates aren't all rocket scientists but a lot of them are educated and the wages are about right for big box retail stores.
Of course, there are many exceptions. A Ph.D can be a cab driver here, too, and the average monthly income of cab drivers here is about US$1,200.
We like to say about the average.
http://www.glassdoor.com/Salary/Walmart-Salaries-E715.htm
http://makingchangeatwalmart.org/factsheet/walmart-watch-fact-sheets/fact-sheet-wages/
barbie~~
Ask a Walmart Expert: How Do You Deal With a Poorly Trained Walmart Cashier?
http://www.groceryshopforfreeatthemart.com/ask-a-walmart-expert-how-do-you-deal-with-a-poorly-trained-walmart-cashier/
barbie~~
Quote from: barbie on May 17, 2015, 04:35:22 AM
Ask a Walmart Expert: How Do You Deal With a Poorly Trained Walmart Cashier?
http://www.groceryshopforfreeatthemart.com/ask-a-walmart-expert-how-do-you-deal-with-a-poorly-trained-walmart-cashier/
barbie~~
The cashiers are actually among the higher paid ones in the store. The lower paid employees are usually stocking shelves or pushing carts.
Quote from: Lady Smith on May 16, 2015, 08:19:01 PM
I buy all my clothing at church goodwill and thrift shops because of my vows and I've never had anybody say anything to me or pass an off comment. Having worked for the adult mental health service as a social worker I know very well that folk with mental illness and refugees from other countries get threatened and mishandled by violent bigoted people too. I cannot even begin to understand why anyone would want to do such hateful things.
I worked in adult mental health, too and frequently those "violent bigoted people" are the people with mental illness. Many illnesses cause disordered thinking and paranoia (specifically thinking schizophrenia, paranoid type) and cause people to be easily led by the types such as Fox News. Black and white thinking makes them believe that attacking minorities they've been told are "evil" is a laudable act that will keep them safe. This is to say that I understand and feel sorry for them, but still hold them accountable for their actions.
Quote from: iKate on May 17, 2015, 05:47:12 AM
The cashiers are actually among the higher paid ones in the store. The lower paid employees are usually stocking shelves or pushing carts.
not quite. cashiers are $0.20 above the base pay that the bottom associates get... stockers are at base pay however, stockers are on the overnight team that get a $1 pay differential. day time sales associates are the lowest paid associates, unless they work in sporting goods, tire/lube express, or electronics.
Quote from: Dee Marshall on May 17, 2015, 06:54:53 AM
I worked in adult mental health, too and frequently those "violent bigoted people" are the people with mental illness. Many illnesses cause disordered thinking and paranoia (specifically thinking schizophrenia, paranoid type) and cause people to be easily led by the types such as Fox News. Black and white thinking makes them believe that attacking minorities they've been told are "evil" is a laudable act that will keep them safe. This is to say that I understand and feel sorry for them, but still hold them accountable for their actions.
People used to ask me if working for the adult mental health service was dangerous and my usual reply was that 'normal' people are far more dangerous than the clients I worked with on a daily basis.
Quote from: Lady Smith on May 17, 2015, 09:02:21 PM
People used to ask me if working for the adult mental health service was dangerous and my usual reply was that 'normal' people are far more dangerous than the clients I worked with on a daily basis.
And on average that is absolutely true. I liked the people I worked with very much. Only a very few of them made me nervous, but I wasn't the type of person who triggered them. The few paranoid schizophrenic people we had had an irrational fear and dislike of some very random sets of people and what they would do when presented with one of those people wasn't easy to predict. All of them were safer to be around than the average person on the street, providing that they were staying on their meds.
I used to tell my clients that the biggest difference between them and other people was that they had been diagnosed and that the others hadn't, YET.