Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Male to female transsexual talk (MTF) => Topic started by: Jessiegirly66 on June 14, 2015, 04:20:35 PM

Title: Opening up
Post by: Jessiegirly66 on June 14, 2015, 04:20:35 PM
Hi ladies,
Last night, when working the drive thru I worked with a girl I hadn't really talked to before even though we just graduated from the same high school. I just felt comfortable working with her and we spent our work hours commenting on cute nails dresses or the like that we saw come through. There was also this cutie with gorgeous blue eyes that came through. Goodness he was cute😊!! We talked about him until I got off at 8. This is the first time I've ever let someone see a part of my female side and it felt wonderful. So my question is this: does anyone have any suggestions on ways I can open up more and maybe make some girlfriends?
Title: Re: Opening up
Post by: stephaniec on June 14, 2015, 04:27:24 PM
I just say relax and be your self.
Title: Re: Opening up
Post by: Jessiegirly66 on June 14, 2015, 04:59:04 PM
This is great advice Stephanie but I have a relax and just be myself problem. It's why i smoke
Title: Re: Opening up
Post by: stephaniec on June 14, 2015, 05:09:42 PM
Well, honestly . I haven't been all that successful in relationship land , but I have had times in my life that have been pretty good with being with people. Honestly , I wish I knew the answers. My only advice is be honest with people.
Title: Re: Opening up
Post by: Laura_7 on June 14, 2015, 05:25:01 PM
Quote from: Jessiegirly66 on June 14, 2015, 04:59:04 PM
This is great advice Stephanie but I have a relax and just be myself problem. It's why i smoke
Well it shouldn't be that difficult if you try to calm down a bit and concentrate a bit more on you... what you feel in the moment... being a bit more outgoing...
often trans people are pretty sensitive to expectations of others... you could just try to relax and do what you feel what comes from within... from your female side... all in a nice way...
just relax, see it as a game :)

hugs
Title: Re: Opening up
Post by: Jessiegirly66 on June 14, 2015, 05:46:22 PM
I will definitely try but I am very worried about what people think of me  :-\
Title: Re: Opening up
Post by: Laura_7 on June 14, 2015, 06:09:03 PM
Quote from: Jessiegirly66 on June 14, 2015, 05:46:22 PM
I will definitely try but I am very worried about what people think of me  :-\
Well you could start by being a bit more outgoing...
nice remarks are often a good thing: nice tshirt... nice weather today... or something else that strikes your eye... an earring... etc...

and what people think... don't take it too personally... its possible it has nothing to do with you. Maybe they had an argument in the morning... or whatever...
just be yourself, all within reason...
by the way often people are glad if someone talks or says something.

Another good idea is asking questions... being a bit interested... and listening... maybe giving a short story from yourself from time to time....

you might give it a try...

oh and after some time, one or two cheeky remarks... to not be only on the friendship lane entirely...

hugs
Title: Re: Opening up
Post by: Jessiegirly66 on June 14, 2015, 06:40:20 PM
This is good advice :) however I just wanted to clear things up. I'm not really looking for a girlfriend per se but more like girls that know I'm a girl.
Title: Re: Opening up
Post by: Laura_7 on June 14, 2015, 07:03:54 PM
Well imo the principle is the same...
getting to know someone, like making a nice remark...
asking a few interested questions... maybe seeing what you have in common...
and take it from there.
The difference to girlfriend is getting out of the friendship lane...
one or two cheeky remarks are ok with friends as well imo...
but with a girlfriends it gets to a more intimate and romantic level... imo by hinting at that... showing interest...

I'd say just take your time...
being a bit nice and outgoing should be a good practise...

hugs
Title: Re: Opening up
Post by: Jessiegirly66 on June 14, 2015, 07:52:03 PM
Thanks Laura :)