I went to this dentist a few times after being recommended by someone. The first time meeting with the dentist he seemed to be kind of friendly, felt like some easy conversation, a different vibe than now. Things just seemed to become weird after that. I started to wonder if my teeth and mouth exposed my transition. The person that rec. this place to me told me the dentist/owner is gay. If this is the reason why he acts differently toward me, I'm surprised he isn't a little more accepting.
Anyway what appeared to be the giveaway that he knew was after I was told I had a cavity. The dentist talked to the nurse a while, then I heard "get her cavity filled soon, and, you know" and it seemed directed at me. Being there was no one else around. I also have a beard.
This would explain the sudden coldness though. Makes me feel very awkward as I am going back tomorrow to get the filling. Anyone else have some sh$t like this happen to them? What are the differences in the mouth that could be spotted easily?
Just doing a little research and female teeth are rounder where's males are more square. But then reading other science papers there's no difference. Hopefully someone else might have a better answer.
But really the dentist should not be so cold towards you since you are a paying customer.
I just had a "movie star" teeth done and I was asking my cosmetic dentist if there was a difference and there is NONE. However, as there is a difference in the average head size there may be a percieved difference. Beside does it matter what he thinks.....
I'm just a smaller person in general. So I had hopes that it might make up for why I have smaller teeth. But yeah it just seemed so weird. Why act that way, you know?
It's hard to say why they acted that way, but when it makes you feel uncomfortable like that you really should let them know that. I don't think they are knowing meaning to treat you a particular way, but sometimes it just happens. It's no excuse, but never the the less it can because rely on those gender markers that we hold everyone too in our minds. Hugs
Mariah
I think the beard probably gave you away (if the dentist did indeed know about you) more that the shape of your teeth. In ever dentist appointment I've been in, the dentist's hands have made contact with my cheeks and chin, and any roughness would have been obvious.
But dentists are in general a weird breed at the best of times. I wouldn't read too much into it.
Well... there are two points here:
One - Female teeth and male teeth are not the same, in general. But most people will not notice this. Mens teeth are bigger and more square like. Womens teeth are rondier, but usually they have what we call "bunny teeth", where the central incisors are bigger and the lateral incisor are smaller . But not all women have this. (And yes, i am a dentist)
Second - Each person have his own problems. Just because someone is gay, doesnt mean that he is open or friendly towards a trans person. Is a very sad thing, but, this is how it is.
It doesn't matter what gave you away. If your dentist is not treating your properly, please stand up for yourself. You are no less a person for being transgender. You deserve the 100% best treatment. Please don't settle for less.
Quote from: suzifrommd on June 18, 2015, 09:09:52 AM
It doesn't matter what gave you away. If your dentist is not treating your properly, please stand up for yourself. You are no less a person for being transgender. You deserve the 100% best treatment. Please don't settle for less.
I agree with this - if your dentist is not being professional find another one. It seems strange to me to treat a paying customer with anything other than respect, but if thats how your current dentist rolls then let it cost him a paying customer.
Quote from: Eva Marie on June 18, 2015, 09:36:40 AM
I agree with this - if your dentist is not being professional find another one. It seems strange to me to treat a paying customer with anything other than respect, but if thats how your current dentist rolls then let it cost him a paying customer.
Not only your dentist, but any professional. You deserves respect from anyone. Talk to him. explain it to him. But if he insists on this behavior, find another professional for you.
There are a lot of unexpected but transphobic gay men. It happens a lot.
I had one argue with me that I should "accept that you've got a dick and just admit you're gay" until I showed him actual microscope slide photographs that showed how radically different the brains of gay men are versus the brains of trans women. And I told him it goes the other way for trans men, that they have male brains.
The reason I remember this is he was one of the few that actually went "Oh? So you really are different?" He got it but I wonder sometimes if some gay men are afraid of trans people because they fear they might get categorized as trans?
Anyway, gay men can be transphobic in surprising numbers.
Quote from: StartingOver on June 18, 2015, 07:22:34 AM
I think the beard probably gave you away (if the dentist did indeed know about you) more that the shape of your teeth.
Umm isn't he FTM?
Quote from: wanessa.delisola on June 18, 2015, 08:50:17 AM
Well... there are two points here:
One - Female teeth and male teeth are not the same, in general. But most people will not notice this. Mens teeth are bigger and more square like. Womens teeth are rondier, but usually they have what we call "bunny teeth", where the central incisors are bigger and the lateral incisor are smaller . But not all women have this. (And yes, i am a dentist)
Second - Each person have his own problems. Just because someone is gay, doesnt mean that he is open or friendly towards a trans person. Is a very sad thing, but, this is how it is.
From what I've read (here is an article about it (http://www.dental-tribune.com/articles/news/europe/8120_mens_and_womens_teeth_do_not_differ_significantly_.html)) teeth alone are not a reliable way of identifying gender. I bigger indicator for teeth is ancestry. For example I have shovel teeth due to a lot of Native American blood in me.
Quote from: Sydney_NYC on June 18, 2015, 09:43:41 PM
From what I've read (here is an article about it (http://www.dental-tribune.com/articles/news/europe/8120_mens_and_womens_teeth_do_not_differ_significantly_.html)) teeth alone are not a reliable way of identifying gender. I bigger indicator for teeth is ancestry. For example I have shovel teeth due to a lot of Native American blood in me.
That's interesting. I had never heard of that before. Just googled it.
It's not anything to do with your actual teeth or mouth as there's no difference between male and female teeth regardless of what anyone thinks. There have also been studies to back that up. So don't feel dysphoric about your teeth. They probably saw dental records or insurance information with your old name or gender marker on it. Anytime you have a cavity or other dental problem the dentist will look up records of the previous dental work you've had done and any insurance information to let you know if you'll need to pay for it out of pocket.
Ouch. Your dentist sounds like a real douchebag tbh.
Sorry that happened to you, man. If you go back just be like "hey, I'm a dude! quit calling me 'she'!" and if he can't respect that then try to find someone else.
((hugs))
I doubt it was the teeth that outed you. To my knowledge, there are no gender markers regarding teeth. Jaw size and width generally are proportional to overall head size as well.
If you were clocked it would have been due to something else.
Quote from: Sydney_NYC on June 18, 2015, 09:43:41 PM
From what I've read (here is an article about it (http://www.dental-tribune.com/articles/news/europe/8120_mens_and_womens_teeth_do_not_differ_significantly_.html)) teeth alone are not a reliable way of identifying gender. I bigger indicator for teeth is ancestry. For example I have shovel teeth due to a lot of Native American blood in me.
Oh, of course it isnt a reliable way of identifying, that was not what I was trying to say. I just tried to point that men and women teeth tends to be different. And yes, racial aspects counts on the form, size, and some times, even number of teeth one have. For instance, some brazilian indian tribes have a fourth molar! I just said all this as curiosity.
Besides, it doesnt matter what gives a person away! Its a matter of respect. Just after i posted my previous comment, a pacient of mine, a very manly woman came in my office. She was not a trans man, but was indeed very manly. But, she presents herself as woman, refers to herself as woman, so, why would i treat her different? Would she be a trans man, why would I treat him as a woman? Its all about respect. No matter who you are, how you show yourself, I will treat you with the same level of respect that you treats me!
Sorry if I wasnt clear enough, english is NOT my native language! :P
Quote from: wanessa.delisola on June 22, 2015, 09:04:15 AM
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Besides, it doesnt matter what gives a person away! Its a matter of respect. Just after i posted my previous comment, a pacient of mine, a very manly woman came in my office. She was not a trans man, but was indeed very manly. But, she presents herself as woman, refers to herself as woman, so, why would i treat her different? Would she be a trans man, why would I treat him as a woman? Its all about respect. No matter who you are, how you show yourself, I will treat you with the same level of respect that you treats me!
Sorry if I wasnt clear enough, english is NOT my native language! :P
I totally agree with you and regardless of of what any chart says, you should be addressed as the gender you present.