Hi, I've recently come to terms with the fact that I am transsexual. I've felt this way for quite a while. In fact, I've already tried telling my mom but she simply dismisses me feeling this way as "Just a phase." I really want to start HRT, but I know since I'm a minor, I'm going to need my parents permission to do so. How can I convince my parents to do this for me? I want this more than anything. I want to start young because everyone says the younger you start, the better the transition. I'd like to start at 15 or 16. But if my parents don't let me, I'll end up having to do it at 18. Also, I'm wondering if my facial structure will be a problem while transitioning on HRT without any surgeries(though I would definitely like to do FFS if I had the chance in the future.) Here are a few pictures:
http://imgur.com/ML3jssT
http://imgur.com/HM3IqNV
http://imgur.com/H1J1Mlk
Please, be brutally honest. I don't want anything sugarcoated.
Hi just come out to them say please take me seriously it's not a phase I'm going through its feeling I've always had I suggest that you ask to see a therapist.welcome to the forum😊
You could have a look here for a few resources that might help:
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,180045.msg1658077.html#msg1658077
and here:
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,188309.msg1674885.html#msg1674885
Its up to you what you say since you know them best...
some people use a letter and show some materials like vids later...
one possibility could be to look for PFLAG, contact them and ask them to help explain... its parents from all walks of life meeting in groups...
imo it would be a good idea to ask for a gender therapist... someone to help you along, and support you... if they are not suportive look for another.
If its connected with depression or emotional issues it might be covered...
and you could look here:
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,190486.msg1697083.html#msg1697083
hugs
First question, if we can get you on blockers, I wouldn't touch that face with a FFS. I think when you go on hormones you will get the little bit of help you need. Your face is still a bit on the lean side but could be passable. The other thing you will have to do is go with a short below the ear haircut. That will round out your face and bang or sweeping the hair over your forehead will help in the rounding. If you look at my picture you will find I used both tricks because that's what works with a long face.
Next getting you on blockers. Look at what Laura posted and I made a letter for hard to deal with cases. Use the letter directly or use the arguments. If you need more backup information on the letter, post your questions here and we will fill in the details for you. https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,190312.0.html (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,190312.0.html)
Hi Danny. Welcome to Susan's. :icon_wave:
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I can't say for sure about your pictures, but I can say that most people are happy with their transitions. I don't see anything that would really get in the way of you looking the way you want.
The best you can do with your mom is try to educate her. Make sure she knows that:
* Being ransgender isn't something you chose.
* It typically doesn't go away on its own, and it can't be "cured".
* It's serious. Anxiety and depression are common among people who ignore it, and that's not a good way to spend your teen years.
* Transitioning to live as your identified gender has a very high rate of positive outcomes.
Repeat these things often if you need to. Some people need to hear things multiple times before they're willing to consider them. If necessary involve other adults. A therapist if you can, or someone from your school if you think there is an LGBT friendly teacher or counselor. You can see if there is a PFLAG chapter near you or some other support organization for LGBT youth and their parents.
Keep posting. A lot of people here have experience with the same issues you're having. Check out our Youth Talk (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/board,496.0.html) area.
I came out at 14, my mother was very supportive and understanding, I think that she was kind of happy.
Just be straight, explain in clear well documented and backed up points, don't get upset and be mature about it.
I know it can be hard, but don't go in looking for a fight and if they start saying hurtful things, don't bite
Welcome to Susan's Danny
Hmmm, when I was a kid (a very long time ago) around 4 or so, I asked the Dr on one of my regular trips to him (had chronic Asthma as a kid till 11 yo) "can I be a girl", he just said to my mother "don't worry its just a passing phase, all kids go through it" well I was devastated and never asked or told anyone again. Err I was male, I was male...(not!).
I tried to adapt to being male all my life, fighting my emotions (and Dysphoric moments) each and every time they came back. Here I am now with a big family and about to break the news.
I wish I could have gone back and kept telling my parents until it sunk in (although way back then it was just never heard of). Its been a real struggle, but not life or death for me.
So I agree with all before and can only echo... keep talking with your parents and maybe get them to help themselves and you with getting in front of suitable gender specialists.
Good luck :-*
L Katy
About your facial structure, you should have no problems :)
Your facial structure looks nice and with HRT your face will probably round out slightly. I personally believe you will look very feminine.
Hugs
I agree you shouldn't have any issues with your face. I agree with what others have said that you should them know so they can get you the care you need. As others have said also, it's not a phase. I was another one who started out young knowing and despite other issues my parent were still told it's just a phase. Good luck and Hugs
Mariah
Thanks you guys! I really appreciate the support and advice :) And those pictures links I sent are literally such bad shots of me but I figured if I sent the absolute worst pictures of me, I would get the most realistic feedback on wether my face would be passable or not so thanks you all! :) I'm trying to work up the courage to bring up the conversation with my mom. She's more understanding than my dad (who is extremely conservative and religious and just overall stubborn.)
My face turned fem from hormones and i started at 36. I though therer was no way without FFS. About parents! many parents are narcissists that think they know everything and hate being wrong. have a therapist tell them you have GID and what they can do to help you or harm you by not believing it. Im sorry if you have to wait till you are 18.
Many years ago I was having a D&M with mum over lunch.
I was asking so many questions about how hard it was on her and my family, she hid a lot of the bad stuff from me.
She told me about how one of my grandparents on my dads side told her that they are against it because my dad would be against it.
Her reply was "I'm sure he would want a daughter over a dead son".
My grandparent change her ways after that.
I don't have much to do with that side, but every year I got a card for xmas & b'days up until they both passed away with Nicole on it.