This may seem like whining about nothing to whine about, but I'm not sure how to handle it. My timeline has been to go fulltime in about 1-2 years. I'm still working on getting that stupid letter for hormones. I only present female at home with my fiance and at some friends' places. Occasionally I'll run up to the gas station in girl mode and once did it to the supermarket, but that's it. For the most part I present male every time I leave the house still.
Because I thought I had a lot of time to prepare, I only told my friends and not my family or job. I can kind of do my makeup and can't do my hair to save my life. My girl voice sounds feminine unless I have to say certain words like strict or practice. Something with having my mouth already compressed when I need to form an 'r' sound makes it sound masculine.
The issue is I'm not passing as a guy anymore and I don't know what's different. It happened a few times last week, all in dimly lit areas, so I thought it was the lighting. But last night it happened in a very well lit store where the sales person was maybe 5 feet away from me. I was presenting as a guy, without any medical transitioning taking place. It makes me feel awkward because I don't feel like I pass and strangers obviously feel like I do. Then I feel obligated to speak and I worry that my voice is going to get me a weird look. I don't feel mentally prepared to go fulltime yet, but since I don't know what I'm doing different to get people to gender me differently, I don't know how to put on the brakes.
Quote from: Emileeeee on July 03, 2015, 09:12:08 AM
This may seem like whining about nothing to whine about, but I'm not sure how to handle it. My timeline has been to go fulltime in about 1-2 years. I'm still working on getting that stupid letter for hormones. I only present female at home with my fiance and at some friends' places. Occasionally I'll run up to the gas station in girl mode and once did it to the supermarket, but that's it. For the most part I present male every time I leave the house still.
Because I thought I had a lot of time to prepare, I only told my friends and not my family or job. I can kind of do my makeup and can't do my hair to save my life. My girl voice sounds feminine unless I have to say certain words like strict or practice. Something with having my mouth already compressed when I need to form an 'r' sound makes it sound masculine.
The issue is I'm not passing as a guy anymore and I don't know what's different. It happened a few times last week, all in dimly lit areas, so I thought it was the lighting. But last night it happened in a very well lit store where the sales person was maybe 5 feet away from me. I was presenting as a guy, without any medical transitioning taking place. It makes me feel awkward because I don't feel like I pass and strangers obviously feel like I do. Then I feel obligated to speak and I worry that my voice is going to get me a weird look. I don't feel mentally prepared to go fulltime yet, but since I don't know what I'm doing different to get people to gender me differently, I don't know how to put on the brakes.
its ok I just gone full time recently been on hormones for two months just take your time it's your journey so when ready go for it lol I got that to when dressed as a guy lol
I think it means you are locking the voice in. When I went full time I switched to my new voice and haven't used to old one in about 35 years. I need to gather some data from it a couple of months ago and discovered I had forgot how to use it. I then figured out how to access the Falsetto and I switched to it within a few hours of discovery and with about a month on it, the Falsetto is locked in. I can drop out of the Falsetto but I have to get the iPhone sound app out to make sure I am in the correct range because there isn't much difference between the mouth voice and the Falsetto. I can see how after voice surgery it will be possible for me to have a very dynamic feminine range.
I'd say don't worry about it , just keep being natural
Quote from: Dena on July 03, 2015, 11:25:47 AM
I think it means you are locking the voice in. When I went full time I switched to my new voice and haven't used to old one in about 35 years. I need to gather some data from it a couple of months ago and discovered I had forgot how to use it. I then figured out how to access the Falsetto and I switched to it within a few hours of discovery and with about a month on it, the Falsetto is locked in. I can drop out of the Falsetto but I have to get the iPhone sound app out to make sure I am in the correct range because there isn't much difference between the mouth voice and the Falsetto. I can see how after voice surgery it will be possible for me to have a very dynamic feminine range.
I think you're right about that. I just tried a few different ways to kind of keep my mouth more open when saying those two words and it does sound better. Not perfect, but better.
And on the topic of moving too fast. Thanks all. I always said I'd go fulltime when this happened, but I never expected it to happen without hormones or this quickly. Pre-transition jitters I guess. I'll just keep doing what I'm doing, slowly coming out of my shell more and working on the other areas that are preventing me from moving forward (hair and voice).
Quote from: Emileeeee on July 03, 2015, 01:57:56 PM
And on the topic of moving too fast. Thanks all. I always said I'd go fulltime when this happened, but I never expected it to happen without hormones or this quickly. Pre-transition jitters I guess. I'll just keep doing what I'm doing, slowly coming out of my shell more and working on the other areas that are preventing me from moving forward (hair and voice).
hugs you'll do well ☺️