I need to get this off my chest. This took alot of thinking and alot of time. But I am coming out as transgender. I want to live the rest of my life as a woman. I think it would make me a happier person and actually love myself more. But there is some things that I need advice on. I do have a son he is still an infant but I need to consider how he will feel as he gets older I don't want to complicate his life in any way. I also have a girlfriend she knows about me wanting to live as a woman. She tells me she probably couldn't be with me if I transition. She says she is not attracted women so it would be hard for her. I feel like she keeps trying to convince me not to she always brings my son up. Idk what to do our say or think, I just need some advice and guidance, anything will help, thank you.
Hi Vanessa, welcome to Susan's.
When it comes to your son, he will acknowledge you as his mom if you transition now and there won't be an issue really. He will never have known you as anyone else. Your girlfriend you can't fault for leaving really no matter how much you might want her to stay. You may find she becomes your good friend though.
A good place to help work through some of these issues would be a gender therapist. They can also help you find resources.
Meanwhile, look around, read and relax, you are among friends.
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A warm welcome to Susan's Vanessa...
Your son is young and probably will accept and not feel awkward about your changes.
For partners and loved ones, its a little harder, it tests, often core values that they may have had instilled in them since children and also often challenges their own sexuality. Many will support and bridge or get over the sexuality bit, some just can't.
Over time, especially if there is a bond beyond the sexual level, possibly will understand and accept and continue a strong relationship and fully support you.
Best wishes and good luck on your journey, however you decide to play it out.
Look forward to seeing you about the forum's
L Katy :-*
You could look here for a few resources that might help:
gires.org.uk/support/explaining-to-children
gires.org.uk/assets/DOH-Assets/pdf/doh-transgender-experiences.pdf
(on page 7 they talk about stress... many experience relief instead)
Well you might simply talk about it... without making reproaches but simply stating your needs and emotions...
and they might state some of their restraints... and you could answer from a position of knowing facts and backgrounds...
imo a good gender therapist is a good idea...
someone who is supportive... if they are not supportive look for another...
there might be a pair therapist, or a therapist additionally for her...
there might be counseling at plannedparenthood or lgbt centers...
and there might be support groups...
hugs