sorry.
It really would be better if you can talk on this thread. None of us are professionals but each has our own experience and combined we will help you more than one of us by ourself. I am going to be tied up for about 3 hours, maybe less so if you need to talk in private and I will do, you may PM me and I will respond when I return. In the meantime, feeling lost and alone isn't an uncommon feeling and most if not all of us have had that feeling at one time or another. It will pass and when it does, there will be better times ahead.
Whats up with your friends?