Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Youth talk => Topic started by: orangepeel on July 28, 2015, 12:42:18 PM

Title: coming out to my parents today
Post by: orangepeel on July 28, 2015, 12:42:18 PM
So I have decided to come out to my parents today. Nothing really influenced this as much as not wanting to live a lie and being unable to afford a binder. I'm really scared. But I know I have to go through with this.
Please wish me good luck. Thank you so much.
Title: Re: coming out to my parents today
Post by: Laura_7 on July 28, 2015, 12:46:20 PM
Here are some resources that might help you:

https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,192499.msg1716659.html#msg1716659

Some people write a letter... and show some materials later...


wish you luck


*hugs*
Title: Re: coming out to my parents today
Post by: Sigyn on July 28, 2015, 12:49:55 PM
I wish you nothing but the best. I wish I would have come out to my parents, because I would have 'come out' earlier!

Please let us know how it goes.
Title: Re: coming out to my parents today
Post by: Dena on July 28, 2015, 01:13:50 PM
Good luck and let us know if there is anything we can do to help.
Title: Re: coming out to my parents today
Post by: MeganeRei on July 28, 2015, 01:48:55 PM
I wish you all the luck.

I just told my mom-- over messaging since that's how she told me she noticed I changed my name and pronouns and asked if there was something I wanted to talk with her about... No response yet!..

Seriously, I wish you luck, I hope it goes really well!
Title: Re: coming out to my parents today
Post by: orangepeel on July 29, 2015, 12:28:28 PM
thanks for all the support. I came out yesterday and it was really scary. My mother, however, was intensely supportive. She told me that she didn't care which gender I was and that she loved me anyways. My father was... okay about it. He isn't the type to be mad at me, but after my mom left he gave me a little speech that trans people had kind of a messed up idea about masculinity and femininity and that it was all stereotyped. I think he needs some time to get used to it.
Title: Re: coming out to my parents today
Post by: Laura_7 on July 29, 2015, 12:57:37 PM
Very well done  :)

Well you might look up a brochure called "doh-transgender-experiences.pdf" . Only thing I would disagree with is page 7, where they state stress, instead many experience relief.
It states that being trans has biological connections, to do with development before birth which influences the sense of self.
So its not a light hearted decision but how they feel, and there are many feeling this way. Its nobodys fault, neither theirs nor that of their upbringing.
This is a restraint many parents may have.

And it explains some of the feelings transgender people have.

But you may be right and they need a bit of time as well to digest it all  :)


hugs

Title: Re: coming out to my parents today
Post by: Dena on July 29, 2015, 01:03:32 PM
Always hard on my nerves when one of you decides it's time to come out. Currently only one is still missing in action.

You did well and the best part is that's behind you and you will never have to do it again. I suspect your father will accept you given a little time. Just let him take is time an learn about this. Don't forget, let us know if we can help.
Title: Re: coming out to my parents today
Post by: Mariah on July 29, 2015, 02:12:35 PM
It does take time and it's certainly nerve racking, but I'm glad things overall went well for you. Give them both time as they get used to this. It sounds like your mom will be good all along, but your dad will definitely need time and maybe even educating because often people don't understand something they are not familiar with. Hugs
Mariah
Title: Re: coming out to my parents today
Post by: Danielle89 on August 01, 2015, 07:01:40 PM
Wish the best for you ^_^ Fighting :D