Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Topic started by: samtheant on August 08, 2015, 02:48:26 AM

Title: Came out!
Post by: samtheant on August 08, 2015, 02:48:26 AM
You may have seen my post on here worrying about coming out to my wife and the potential of losing my family and home.

Well last night I came out to my wife, who was amazing. She reassured me she'll love me whatever, and that she will help me do whatever I need to do.
She even started making a mental list of things we need to do "first we'll change your name, and then we'll tell people, and get you a medical appointment..."
I am so blessed!
I feel a bit weird and a bit scared this morning but she gave me a hug - I think it's going to be ok.
I can't believe I did it!
Title: Re: Came out!
Post by: Cindy on August 08, 2015, 02:52:18 AM
Great News! Remember to keep the communication open and expect hiccups!
Title: Re: Came out!
Post by: Ms Grace on August 08, 2015, 02:58:26 AM
That's great news. The thing about coming out is, whether it goes well or not, it is an awesome feeling to get that off your chest and into the open. I don't want to dampen your mood or worry you but just be mindful that the first reaction from a significant other is not always the final reaction. Now things might get even better, but there's a chance they may go backwards, the important thing to remember is that this journey is now about the two of you. She will have doubts, concerns and questions as the nature of your news sinks in - the important thing is to keep the communication open. Support her though any doubts that arise and it will hopefully smooth the way for a happy future together.
Title: Re: Came out!
Post by: FTMDiaries on August 08, 2015, 03:29:31 AM
Congrats! I had a feeling she might've reacted well; it sounds like you've picked a good 'un there. :)

Having her support will make it so much easier for you to cope with the massive changes you're both about to go through. As the ladies above have said there may be some ups & downs, but this is a very positive start.

Well done! :D
Title: Re: Came out!
Post by: Rachel on August 08, 2015, 06:40:05 AM
Fantastic news. You are so lucky to have such an avid supporter in your wife.
Title: Re: Came out!
Post by: Laura_7 on August 08, 2015, 07:54:26 AM
Congratulations  :)


hugs
Title: Re: Came out!
Post by: kathb31 on August 08, 2015, 02:34:16 PM
I am so very happy for you. She sounds like a wonderful person. I to, just recently came out
to my wife. I had convinced myself for a long time that it would be a disaster and I would lose
everything, especially her. But it was better even than my best scenarios and I did not have
many of those. She was amazing.  So loving and supportive, I just melted. She was so relieved
that it wasn't something else.
I have noticed that our relationship has changed some since my telling .. as she has become
stronger and more assertive, which is perfectly ok with me. We have talked about this and many
other things as the past has sort of started falling into place for her (the talking part is so important).
We have a lot to sort through but I have hope for the first time in a long time.  I'm sure you have
that same kind of release and joyous feeling.

All the best,
Kath
Title: Re: Came out!
Post by: bchigdon10 on August 10, 2015, 07:56:04 AM
Thats great my wife and I worked at the same company she all ready knew I was trans .We where talking about this same topic I asked her did it bother her she said whatever made me happy was ok with her.Its a good feeling our spouses understand isn't it?
My wife actually helps me buy my clothes she works as a phone oprerator&the fiiting attendent at Walmart she keeps an eye out for good deals and tells me.Good luck HUGS from Beverly!

Sent from my SM-T217S using Tapatalk

Title: Re: Came out!
Post by: destinysummerfield on August 10, 2015, 08:24:51 AM
Wow your so lucky I wish I could find a spouse as supportive I'm currently divorced due to reasons beyond either of ours control but I had asked her while we were married if she would stay with me if I transitioned however she never really answered

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Title: Re: Came out!
Post by: Paige on August 10, 2015, 08:37:45 AM
Quote from: samtheant on August 08, 2015, 02:48:26 AM
You may have seen my post on here worrying about coming out to my wife and the potential of losing my family and home.

Well last night I came out to my wife, who was amazing. She reassured me she'll love me whatever, and that she will help me do whatever I need to do.
She even started making a mental list of things we need to do "first we'll change your name, and then we'll tell people, and get you a medical appointment..."
I am so blessed!
I feel a bit weird and a bit scared this morning but she gave me a hug - I think it's going to be ok.
I can't believe I did it!

That's absolutely amazing.  I wish my wife was so understanding.  You definitely married one of the good ones.

Good luck with the transition,
Paige :)
Title: Re: Came out!
Post by: Jacqueline on August 10, 2015, 10:08:08 AM
Congratulations,

That is great. Coming out to my wife was the hardest thing I have ever done.

Not trying to deflate or be negative. However, if she had no clue before hand, she may still be processing it. If she loves you she wants you to be happy and not suffering. However, it is  some big news and usually takes a few weeks for it all to sink it.

I wish you  warmth, love and a smooth journey. As mentioned before, do keep the communications going.

With warm thoughts,

Joanna
Title: Re: Came out!
Post by: Atria on August 10, 2015, 08:48:38 PM
Congratulations! My coming out to girlfriend of three years wasn't as lucky. But I'm with someone who loves me. So I'm glad we both have people that love us no matter what! :)
Title: Re: Came out!
Post by: bchigdon10 on August 11, 2015, 07:30:12 AM
Quote from: destinysummerfield on August 10, 2015, 08:24:51 AM
Wow your so lucky I wish I could find a spouse as supportive I'm currently divorced due to reasons beyond either of ours control but I had asked her while we were married if she would stay with me if I transitioned however she never really answered

Sent from my Z970 using Tapatalk
I wish you good luck in finding someone you will meet the right person someday! Hugs from Beverly!!

Sent from my SM-T217S using Tapatalk

Title: Re: Came out!
Post by: traci_k on August 11, 2015, 08:22:28 AM
OMG! That is so awesome. Your spouse is a treasure!
Title: Re: Came out!
Post by: katrinaw on August 11, 2015, 08:27:21 AM
Congratulations...  Yay

Lovely outcome for you with your loved ones, so happy for you!

Katy xx

Title: Re: Came out!
Post by: JenniferLopezgomez on August 11, 2015, 09:38:07 AM
Congratulations on your coming out decision. It take courage to do that.

I feel happy you have a good result with this so far with your wife.  I hope it continues.

Many of my friends have huge problems with this, and many of my friends have great success.

May YOUR experience continue in success. xx