Nearly two weeks ago, I broke it off with my ex-partner FTM because of his infidelity. My ex has a bit of a high local profile so I haven't been public about why I broke it off with him. I am getting really frustrated with everyone acting like because he is in transition and involved with activism that I should have given him an allowance for bad behavior.
I have been supportive and have done everything from buy him binders, help him find jobs, support him financially, and even buy him hormones. Its not because of his transition that I broke it off which is how he is positioning it among our mutual friends. Its because I came home from a trans community meeting to find him cuddling with another woman on the couch. A woman that I had warned him about and asked him about why he kept slipping away with her and why I never seem to met her, etc. Then I found a video of them kissing on my computer and all this BS. It was truly hurtful all around. He had been a turd for a year before this and has bordered on emotional abusive for some of the relationships so its not all being of the cheating, but that is the rawest wound right now.
I support his causes and I don't want to make him out to be a public ass or anything, but I am so frustrated with this boys will be boys mentality. Has this happened to any of you? How did you deal with it?
It's real easy to see him agreeing with friends when they say "The bitch broke up with you over the transition, right?"
It is a lot harder to say "I was cheating on her for a while and got caught."
So true. I guess I am hurt because I was the first one to really validate and support him about the transition. Even he said that I was the first one to see him as himself. I guess to some folks that doesn't mean as much.
Well I'd say try to move on... don't see it with too much emotion.
You did stick to what you feel is right for you...
helping and accepting others (within reason...)
and not accepting behaviour you feel is not right for you...
you might communicate that to others if necessary...
wish you well
*hugs*