Heya. So, I'm 18 years old, live with my extremely religious mother (she's a Jehovah's Witness) and am positive I'm a transgender woman. Problem is, because of my mother's religious beliefs if I did anything to move towards transitioning I'd be kicked out of the house, immediately. Right now I'm not in a position financially where I'd be able to live on my own, so for now I have to keep up the charade of believing in her religion and being a guy.
My question to all of you is: what are things I can do to prepare to transition in the future? What sort of things should I be researching? Is there anything you wish you'd known in advance that you didn't? Just anything that comes to your mind that would be good for me to know, I guess! I'll feel a lot better if I I'm making some sort of progress while I'm stuck here, so thanks in advance!
Welcome to Susan's Place. In a way I took your path in life but not because of religion. The transition eats money so the best advice is get the education for a good paying job. This could mean college or trade school depending on your abilities. Once you have the money to live off and pay transition cost, you will be ready start.
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Laser hair removal isn't noticeable, you could start there. :-)
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You can still do the following:
Lose weight if you need to. Losing weight is much easier when you're full of testosterone!
Pick up on female mannerisms and work on your walk, poise and demeanor
Voice training (it's never too early to start)
Save as much money as you can while you can live rent-free. Coming out when you are no longer dependent puts the cards in your hands.
Laser hair removal
Electrolysis
Develop a long term plan for education and a career that is most compatible with you and your transition
Grow your hair out on top surfer style. Nobody will be any the wiser.
Research gender therapists and trans-friendly doctors in your area
Make friends who are also trans
It is also possible to begin transitioning hormonally, or taking a therapeutic dose of HRT long before you transition socially.
If you are losing your hair, you might want to look into finasteride right away.
Your mother and other family members might be lost causes, so please prepare for the fallout.
Again, get a long term strategy for being self-sufficient. Working more than one job is not uncommon, but look to work for a company with a health insurance plan that covers everything you will need.
That's all I have for the moment.
Hugs,
Jill
What has been instrumental in turning my life around for the better and keeping me alive was my 'local' TG support group. 'Local' being some 90 miles away.
Thanks to everyone for the replies. It really means the world to me. <3
Voice training. Cheap, can be done anywhere, and easily hidden. It takes a long time too... so earlier the more practice you'll have.
My suggestion would be to try and get hormone treatment started. This may be a bit difficult, because you probably would need to find a doctor who is willing to prescribe them without you living as a female - and he probably needs a referral letter from a psychiatrist backing this up. It may take you quite a few doctors visits to find one that is willing to do this.
Reasoning:
* Be aware that you should be VERY positive about wanting to transition before you go there *
However, hormone treatment and the emotional and mental reaction to it is also a good indicator about being transsexual, transgenders or none of these.
Hormone treatment is something that at your age is still very much more effective than it will be with 20, 24 or 30. Every year counts until you are about 25, because your body still is developing and has still potential to develop more female or more male body features. So at least getting hormone blockers to prevent getting more masculine makes sense and those are often easier to get, to get a proper treatment however, estrogens are the primary choice instead.
I hope you can get out of that situation soon, it can be very painful to see the life and body developing towards more masculine direction when you know that this is wrong.