I was reading a thread and saw that another member has the same trouble as me, maybe its more common
I look at myself in any mirror and I look great, cute, girlie.... try and take a picture and I look like a total man, my awesome hair nearly disappears, my features look masculine and I usually look like my father. Walk back to a mirror and Im awesome again.... ???
I definitely notice that it is much harder to take a photo that represents the way you look in 3D
I think a lot of it has to do with lighting and the way our eyes & brain capture form vs a lens with film / sensor. You really do see so much more with your own two eyes, a lot of things get lost in photos while other things are enhanced.. Doesn't always work out in a person's favor
I would try a more diffused lighting, like standing facing a large window
I also have this exact same problem. It is so bad that I am developing a phobia about it and break into tears when I see a picture of myself.
You usually can turn down the flash, this might help some.
And you might take a pic from different views, from the side etc ...
Ive always disliked photos of myself and avoid them, but I thought that was a gender identity issue, now I hate the ones where I am supposed to be gender correct...
Quote from: Laura_7 on November 10, 2015, 06:02:10 AM
You usually can turn down the flash, this might help some.
And you might take a pic from different views, from the side etc ...
Or I can just avoid the camera and have a happier life...
I have the opposite problem. I look in the mirror and see the same reflection that I hated for so many years staring back at me. When I see a picture, I am shocked at the changes.
I absolutely hate seeing pictures of me because they look nothing like what I see in the mirror.
Quote from: RitaChans on November 10, 2015, 05:03:44 AM
I was reading a thread and saw that another member has the same trouble as me, maybe its more common
I look at myself in any mirror and I look great, cute, girlie.... try and take a picture and I look like a total man, my awesome hair nearly disappears, my features look masculine and I usually look like my father. Walk back to a mirror and Im awesome again.... ???
Get someone to snap candid pictures for you. They always turn out better than selfies.
Another good idea is to take a LOT of pictures in quick succession instead of trying to snap that one perfect photo....then you can pick one from the pile you've taken. I tend to think that it's the trying to pose and capture a staged moment that is the issue, and also why the candid shots others take without you knowing can be some of the best.
Before this last year, I think I had only 6 pictures of me. For my whole life. I had other problems that needed to be addressed from a long term abusive relationship. It is truly amazing how my self image has improved once I started dealing with that. Now I like most selfies I take of myself. A project thirty years in the making ;)
Cindi
The photo problem I have is taking too many :) I can catch the right angles and lighting with a camera, and easily delete the ones that aren't quite right. When I look back, I wind up with a very positive view of the photos .... probably too positive for where I'm really at, but I'm a bright-side kind of person.
Mirrors ... I have a love hate relationship with. In guy mode, I'm seeing my feminine side more easily in the mirror. In girl mode .... bathroom lighting is viscous. I have a small mirror in my kitchen that is much more forgiving.
No photo has ever been able to capture how wonderful I feel about being a transgender girl and woman in transition. I do like my image in the fuzzy reflections we can catch in window glass but the sharp edges of a camera or mirror, meh.
Yes, I definitely look more feminine in person than in pictures. The odd thing is that with video I do look more like how I look in the mirror which is feminine. There is something about stills that makes thing look more masculine. Also lighting plays a big roll. One trick for pictures is to overdo the makeup a little. Still pictures seem reduce the effect of makeup and makes you face look more natural in a good way.
On my iPhone sometimes using the chrome filter makes my face look more feminine and the back camera gives more flattering pictures than the front facing camera. Sometimes seeing your reflection just in glass (not mirror) make certain shadows present that make me look more masculine especially in the brow that don't show in person or a mirror. I once looked in the mirror next to some reflective glass and couldn't believe the difference. My cis wife was next to me and it had the same effect on her.
Definitely feel the same way.
I feel like a woman when I'm dressed and I seem to naturally act like one too (or possibly overact!), but look in the mirror and I can't see totally through a bloke in drag!!! Okay, I've been a boy/man for 40+ years so what do I expect! My conscience sees an over-weight body with male facial features, thighs and calves like tree trunks, no real feminine waistline, wearing ladies clothes and thinks, "You are joking aren't you? How the hell can you pass yourself off as a woman?", even with make-up. But, I can't stop the desire to continue.
In honesty, I'm never happy with the photo's taken of me as a bloke and cringe at the selfies so I'm not photogenic as either sex :D I guess we'll always see things differently to how others see us because we potentially have higher expectations or are familiar with things we don't like that become forever dominant in any view of ourselves.
Jenni
Yes yes yes. I have angles from which I look horrible on a photo. Doesn't everyone have those??
But when you meet me and talk with me, you see that girl before you even if looks is flickering. Appearance on its own is one part of the gender perception (and beauty after all), but not the only one.
Experiment. Could be it is what you haven't tried yet that gives good photos.
before I started transition, I saw a therapist for non gender related issues I was having, and as we were talking I decided to tell her about my trans issues, and I even went as far as telling her that if I looked in the mirror long enough I could see a glimpse of a woman; she replied "you would have to look for an awfully long time."
Quote from: kittenpower on November 10, 2015, 04:38:17 PM
before I started transition, I saw a therapist for non gender related issues I was having, and as we were talking I decided to tell her about my trans issues, and I even went as far as telling her that if I looked in the mirror long enough I could see a glimpse of a woman; she replied "you would have to look for an awfully long time."
Sorry, I really did laugh out loud reading that! That's the sort of sarcastic thing I'd say to somebody!
Definitely, positively yes!
Every time I take a photo my nose seems to cover about half of my face. Big it may be, but I don't get quite such a bad impression if I look in the mirror.
Quote from: JennyOwen on November 10, 2015, 05:50:36 PM
Sorry, I really did laugh out loud reading that! That's the sort of sarcastic thing I'd say to somebody!
;D
I honestly think everyone thinks they look worse in pictures. It's normal. I think pictures are all about lighting. Sometimes your camera doesn't access NATURAL light so it makes you look much different. I wouldn't worry too much. Try and practice what angles work best for you. Sometimes people pose in a way that doesn't work for them. You can't just snap a picture of you in any position, I certainly can't. But yea I think it's about the camera having an unnatural light that doesn't capture your real features. A camera/phone with a flip screen helps a lot so you can see how you look somewhat before you take the picture. There are also filters you can use.
What an opportune post!
I have been contacted by a photographer who is doing an exhibition of portraits of transgender women who have no fear - for some reason she is coming to my place tomorrow to take pics of me.
I'll see if they are any good and try to pick up some tips.
Yeah, I hate pictures of myself too, that's why internet disease is so prevalent. In pictures I think that I always look like a big goofball.
There are angles I like the look of myself better from though, and I think that we all see ourselves way differently than others see us. Like people call me skinny all the time, but I think that I'm fat as hell, and proportioned like a hideous mutant.
Yes! Absolutely. Many times I have stood in front of a mirror, pleased with what I saw. I snap a selfie, and I am immediately disappointed in the image. It looks nothing like what I see in the mirror. Just awful. I can't figure it out. The focal length of phone camera lenses?
Terri
I am not photogenic too. So what i do is stand in front of a big mirror and take a portable mirror, moving it around to get a better representation of myself.
I've noticed that I often look a lot worse in selfies than in other pictures. There's something about the perspective in selfies which makes me look less feminine.
That said, I once forwarded a selfie to a friend of mine, and asked her what she thought. She was at work, so she showed the image to a coworker and asked him "Do you notice anything different about this person?". The only thing he seemed to notice was my sidecut hair, and replied "Is she lesbian?"...
So basically, while selfies do look worse than other pictures, and (at least in my case) still pictures in general also often look worse than the live person, there is a dysphoric component to it, where sometimes even if you think you don't pass at all in a picture, people who don't know you may well not clock you if they see it.
You're experience is an interesting psychological phenomenon that most people experience. Since we look at ourselves in the mirror very often we tend to mentally overlook aspects of our appearance that are always there. Seeing yourself in a photo you more easily compare yourself to other people you see in photos and it's easier to notice the things you overlook in the mirror.
I find this a useful thing, though. Thanks to digital photography it's easy to snap shot of yourself in various outfits or even hairstyles to decide what your best look is. I learned a lot from just doing online digital makeovers, for instance.
I actually like pictures of me somewhat but hate looking into the mirror.
When I came out to my brother his response was, omg I'm sorry. You're gonna be really ***** ugly, don't so it because you'll hate the changes and probably commit suicide. He is such a cheerful guy.
Yep. I'm not all that attractive. In fact I find myself quite not good looking. My pictures are always horrible. But somehow guys are attracted to me and I pass easily and effortlessly. Go figure.
Selfies make everyone look bad. They are taken from too close a distance, that unfairly emphasizes nose, cheekbones, etc.. Portrait photographers know this and deliberately take the picture from a long distance, using a long lens. A professional portrait looks more natural for that reason. Get a friend to take the picture for you, using a good camera with a zoom lens, and tell the friend to stand well back.
If I am in a selfie mood I have to generally take about 10-20 selfies before I find a picture that is actually flattering to me. Part of it is trying different angles and lighting. It's a process of trial and error. Professional photographers probably take hundreds of pictures of models and select one perfect picture out of those hundreds.
This issue drives me up the wall, not because of my pictures but yours. Far to many of the pictures on the site are taken with a cell phone that has a wide angle lens on it. Some of the pocket camera can also do this if the lens isn't zoomed out enough. This causes a fishbowl effect that isn't flattering. In the mirror we see a normal view and a professional photographer uses a mild telephoto lens to reduce the fishbowl effect even more.
I have spent years in the darkroom working with prints so I can see this not only in my shots but in those taken by others so sometimes it's painful to see the distortion caused by the camera of some attractive people.
Two tips of taking selfies or photos of yourself.
1. Go out and get outdoor photos. Cloudy day is the best as it is not too dark or too bright.
2. Take photos while you are moving. It makes you look more natural. One of my friends, a photographer, says photos of taking a pose are without life.
barbie~~
Quote from: Dena on November 12, 2015, 10:27:24 AM
This issue drives me up the wall, not because of my pictures but yours. Far to many of the pictures on the site are taken with a cell phone that has a wide angle lens on it. Some of the pocket camera can also do this if the lens isn't zoomed out enough. This causes a fishbowl effect that isn't flattering. In the mirror we see a normal view and a professional photographer uses a mild telephoto lens to reduce the fishbowl effect even more.
I have spent years in the darkroom working with prints so I can see this not only in my shots but in those taken by others so sometimes it's painful to see the distortion caused by the camera of some attractive people.
AWESOME, so Im attractive.... yes! ;D
Which is real though? Our own perception of ourselves in the mirror or what the camera lens capture? I wondered about this before.
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Quote from: clarabrown on November 13, 2015, 08:41:58 PM
Which is real though? Our own perception of ourselves in the mirror or what the camera lens capture? I wondered about this before.
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Oh. It is a philosophical question. Neither is real. It depends on your or their mind.
If you are more interested in showing yourself to others, the camera capture is more objective, IMHO.
barbie~~
Omg yes! I so have this problem! I can never get the photo to reflect what's in the mirror! I tried a video today in the do I pass thread to see if that gives a better representation... Since pictures can only say so much
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Quote from: barbie on November 14, 2015, 12:06:51 AM
Oh. It is a philosophical question. Neither is real. It depends on your or their mind.
If you are more interested in showing yourself to others, the camera capture is more objective, IMHO.
barbie~~
Oh no i meant how do ppl see us? The sameway we see ourselves or the way the camera captures us?
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Quote from: clarabrown on November 14, 2015, 02:05:14 AM
Oh no i meant how do ppl see us? The sameway we see ourselves or the way the camera captures us?
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Maybe somewhere in between ?
Have you recorded your voice and played it back ?
It sounds different.
With pictures there is imo additionally an effect of kind of an aura... an emanation, which is not necessarily included in photos...
and photos can be misleading.
I once photographed a room to show it was not good... looked like a palace on the photo...
there are even movies making fun of this...
from outside a small camping vehicle, from inside a huge hall...
Quote from: clarabrown on November 13, 2015, 08:41:58 PM
Which is real though? Our own perception of ourselves in the mirror or what the camera lens capture?
That varies greatly from person to person. Everyone likes different things about people's appearance and looks at others differently. Still, I'd suppose the camera image makes it easier to compare one person to another, so that's probably closer to what people see-- on first glance, at least.
However, when we know a person for their personality and see them often we tend to look at them more as the personality and less as the objective image.
There is no way to truly know how people see us as every individual's eyes are filtered through their own lenses. Some see us us awesome seekers of truth, and I would assume they see the inner and outer beauty that we do. Others see us as oddities and they likely see our flaws and such much more readily. Still others are against our very existence. They will likely never see anything in us as good or attractive...
So I really believe that there is no answer to the question. I know how I see myself when I look in the mirror. Some time I will snap a shot, or have on taken that I do not like. There are so many variables to a photograph. Many times, I see the same person in the mirror and on the screen. The main thing I know is that no camera can capture the love that I have for myself and others and that is my true beauty!
I gain weight and masculine features in photos, so I don't do them anymore.
Quote from: Emileeeee on November 16, 2015, 09:52:13 AM
I gain weight and masculine features in photos, so I don't do them anymore.
me too!
Anyone ever see yourself while taking meds like the medical pot! I never had an issue until then.. It was a very grounding experience:(
Postcards from the other side:)
Do you perhaps mean... do I like what I see more when I am stoned perhaps.... oh yes fer sure