Hi all. Just curious if there was anyone here who transitioned before hrt. Like wore women's clothing in public, etc... I get curious when I hear these experiences!
I can and does happen. I wasn't one who did but I gather it is common. In some countries, unfortunately, living as a woman first is still a pre-requisite for getting HRT, so many have had no choice but to go down that path. Fortunately it's becoming less common now.
Yeah, I spent about 3 years of being socially female (nights out with friends etc) as I felt more comfortable dressing in that way. Then I did the work thing as well when I 'officially' started my transition, which was about 1.5 years of doing name change stuff and, basically, being true to myself in the way I dressed, acted and the like.
So I started the HRT around 1.3 years ago, after around 4.5 years of a building transitional period. This wasn't intentional as an approach, it was just a natural progression that I suppose a lot of people do in secret but I just did it in a very open manner. There was a fair amount of going out in a female/non-binary way for years prior to my social transition, so it wasn't much of a surprise to those around me.
Never really had much of a negative experience from it; obviously there will always be some idiot in the street yelling things, but that's something that just happens regardless and is about their insecurity, not me....I look awesome! ;) Happens less these days, but then again I get clocked less as it's been a while. Not that I am, or have ever been, slavishly trying to 'pass', I've just been wearing clothes and presenting myself in a way that I'm comfortable and that makes me happy.
So, basically, the whole thing has been an evolution of myself and a very positive experience. I really think that doing it all in the open, from just being a 'guy who sometimes wears skirts', to being 'a guy who wears whatever he wants' and then everything beyond that has really limited the internal worry about what people will think, as I know because they are seeing the progression along with me. This is also useful because there wasn't ever any point that anyone had to deal with a huge leap between one gender and another.
It is, and always has been, my attitude that people need to spend significantly less time worrying about what other people think and just do what makes them feel happy. As long as it isn't actually bringing harm to other people or actually causing them issues (them not understanding doesn't count; they don't have to!) then just get on with it and sod anyone that has a problem with.
Not sure if that's what you were looking for as a response, but the TL;DR is that yes, I suppose I did. And it was ace.
;D
I've still not started HRT and I'm not fully transitioned yet, but I do get out and about quite a bit as a female. I think I would like to progress a bit more before I go full time.
It's quite a work up for me to get looking presentable, but it's totally worth it :) I usually stick to places that won't be trouble, so no one really bothers me. I even had men going out their way to open doors for me or chatting to me a few times. Sometimes my ability to pass is a bit hit and miss, but I usually blend ok considering I'm a 6'1" T-girl.
Really I feel that getting out en femme is something I need to do, but also I look on it as good practice for when I do transition / go full time.
Like Grace said, there has been an expectation in my country (at least until more recently) that people start to present before getting hormones. I don't always agree with how that works, but what can you do?
Sarah
I went full time almost 2 months before I started HRT. For me, it came down to what I could do right then. It took me a while to get on HRT due to having to get a letter from a Therapist, Get Blood Tests Done, and waiting for appointments. I had already lost 5 months due to various issues (no local therapist accepted my insurance, the first therapist I looked into only did appointments during work hours, and general procrastination).
Here is how I went full-time. I had filled out my name change petition and was going to drop it off at the court house over lunch. So, I changed my clothes and went down and filed my petition. At some point during that lunch break, I decided I had had enough of faking it and returned to work as the real me. I had been slowly feminizing (painting my nails, shaving regularly, grew my hair out, etc...) so it wasn't like it came out of nowhere to people.
I went full time three months before starting HRT. It came to the point where I had to do it, I was super miserable living as male and being seen as one. And when I had a jerk at work decide to dig into my private life and out me it gave me the excuse to go full time.
During my time before HRT I changed my name, drivers license etc. Got passable at makeup and clothing. I got gendered correctly more times the wrongly. But now looking back at my early days I have no idea how I did it as I looked horrible.
Hey everybody. Thanks for replying. Sorry I didn't respond sooner I am busy with exams.
There are many who are not on HRT, but wear fully in public, including me.
barbie~~