I'm MTF post-op for decades. I live in a big city and attend various support groups etc. at times. It seems like there are lots of women who identify as lesbian or asexual, but no one, except sex-workers attracted to men. I like men. I have a profession, I write, I have never been a sex-worker, I actually identify with many of the people on this board a lot, but I just do not get why I am different. I have bf, who is not totally straight (I wouldn't consider myself a model for all women either). Do any of the women here ever even consider men? In fantasy? I have written two novels with happy endings (Yes, this is advertising; but how many trans novels with happy endings exist? How many?) Lettie Zeste on Amazon/kindle; 'Almost' (for grown-ups) and 'Not quite the same' (for teens). But this fiction is based on the idea that boys and girls might want to be together (in 'Not quite the same' the guy is weakly a CD, but he is basically masculine). I would like to write more in the Trans genre, but I feel like I do not get my audience. I understand the audience for romance novels, but I am missing something with this group, though I really wish that I could connect. Any ideas? Is the concept of men and women together totally dated?
- Lettie
It's funny, I am asexual and it seems like everyone here is straight, bi or lesbian! Perhaps trans women are just so used to feeling lonely that we seek that niche wherever we go. But for real there are tons of women here with boyfriends and husbands etc. i even have an aesthetic atraction to masculine bodies and presentations.
I'm bisexual , does that count
I am Demisexual so I really haven't figured it out yet and may never but in any case, there are threads where many MTF declare they will seek out men after surgery. There are also a number who are post surgical who have described their post surgical activities as heterosexual. It goes through cycles and lately there seem to be a number who are dealing with wives and girlfriends but last summer I was seeing more in the heterosexual area.
No, you aren't weird but I think you took a look at this site at the wrong time. I have been living here for about 6 months and haven't missed much.
Hey lettie
Welcome to Susan's :) Great to have you here - looking forward to seeing you around the forum.
There are plenty of trans women who are attracted to men (and who are not sex workers either). Don't define your sexuality by what other people are doing, follow your own heart, passion and desires.
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Cheers
Grace
It is fine.
Some girls like boys. Some discover it on HRT, some before it.
I'm attracted to straight men and they are attracted to me. I'm not a sex worker.
*shrugs*
I don't see how it's "weird"- I'm attracted to men and never worked as a sex worker.
I am a straight woman and will only date men. I'm also not a sex worker :)
Hugs,
I consider myself to be a straight trans woman. I love straight men.
I was a sexy worker... But never a sex worker.
But I am only attracted to men.
I'm complicated,im only attracted to women. This has helped our marriage too survive.
i don't think your atypical at all. I'm bisexual. Married to a woman. I have always liked men as well. Before marriage and transition i had relationships with guys. Really my attraction to both genders is pretty equal. The person's character is the most important thing.
I like men, straight men with amazing abs and hair. So,l..no your not weird
I'm willing to hookup with anyone, as long as I find them attractive.
I'm bi and with some evidence think I might lean towards men. However, I'm married and monogamous so it's not an issue open for exploration.
It's not weird at all. I started out as lesbian and within the last year I've begun to identify as bi-sexual. I am starting to become more and more attracted to men the longer I transition and the longer I am on female hormones. It's entirely possible that I've been Bi all along but didn't realize it. Very soon here I will begin dating a bi-sexual man. He sees me as a woman. He's the first man I've ever fallen for. So you're not alone, there are lots of other trans-women that are attracted to men.
Plus,.anal sex is da bomb yo!
Im not into other females. im into guys and many other T girls my age I know are into guys as well. im not sure what you mean by the other part? maybe some people have male habits is what your trying to say? i think it has to do with some people living as male for so long those habits are hard to break? idk
Quote from: Kathleenmarie on November 30, 2015, 05:46:18 PM
Plus,.anal sex is da bomb yo!
Agreed! :laugh: I mean, I've always liked anal stimulation, but then with the hormonal influence as well as guys noticing me more... it all just ended up clicking. :) I still like women though, but it's harder for me to think about women sexually when I'm not exactly equipped for lesbian sex.. ::) I just feel like it'd be harder to get with a woman as a woman if she knows I have male parts. I know many would be accepting, but my last ex-gf is a lesbian and we were together before I transitioned, so she instilled a lot of worry about that since she didn't have much interest in me sexually. Men though... I get a lot of interest from them, and have been with several intimately.. The sex is good when it's good, but dealing with how men are, especially in terms of a relationship, can be quite frustrating. :/ I still wonder if I'm going to end up leaning more one way or the other. I mean, I do at various times, but I wish I'd settle on a preference... Otherwise being bisexual, for me, is frustrating and annoying. >_<
BOY OH BOY you are weird
Can I join you? as we are both weird.
Birds of a feather.
Have a nice day.
Janet
PS Weird being not like the vast majority
Quote from: Ashey on December 02, 2015, 05:35:07 PM
Agreed! :laugh: I mean, I've always liked anal stimulation, but then with the hormonal influence as well as guys noticing me more... it all just ended up clicking. :) I still like women though, but it's harder for me to think about women sexually when I'm not exactly equipped for lesbian sex.. ::) I just feel like it'd be harder to get with a woman as a woman if she knows I have male parts. I know many would be accepting, but my last ex-gf is a lesbian and we were together before I transitioned, so she instilled a lot of worry about that since she didn't have much interest in me sexually. Men though... I get a lot of interest from them, and have been with several intimately.. The sex is good when it's good, but dealing with how men are, especially in terms of a relationship, can be quite frustrating. :/ I still wonder if I'm going to end up leaning more one way or the other. I mean, I do at various times, but I wish I'd settle on a preference... Otherwise being bisexual, for me, is frustrating and annoying. >_<
I have to admit that there are times I wish I didn't like/love men so much... and it's mostly because of how the average man is in terms of a relationship. Last night at work the girls and I were having a lot of girl talk and it all seemed to be bitching about men. One of the girls and I were discussing one guy in particular that we work with. He's just a player for the most part. He plays with all the girls there and he even plays with me, presenting as male at work. It's frustrating because I actually do like him a lot and he's shown interest in me as a male and that's cool, but he was also the first person I came out to at work about being transgender. After I told him that I was planning on starting HRT soon, some of the things he's said have been simply disgusting to me. Like he thinks it will be ok to just grab my breast when they start developing. He even said he'd "->-bleeped-<- the ->-bleeped-<- out of me" after I start.
I don't know why I like him so much. I guess it's because when he's good, he's good. But he's such a player and can be such a major ->-bleeped-<-. I'm kind of hoping that HRT will set my brain right and I'll be able to tell him to go ->-bleeped-<- himself, which is probably what I should be doing right now. It's just so hard because every time I see him, I'm just so crazy in love.
Msg me? Please. I'm curious about a few things and would like some feedback
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I'm Bi, I used to think I was a straight 50/50 but over the last couple of years I've been leaning more towards guys. *shrug*
At the end of the day sexuality is what you make of it, I wouldn't say anywhere on the spectrum is weird, your attracted to who your attracted to and there's not much really that you can do about it.
Nope, you're not weird. But apparently, heterosexuality is too mainstream for your friends. Do it ironically. :D
Yes you are !!! All of us are weird one way or the other :) ;)
I have been with both guys and girls after my transition, and I have to say that i prefer guys 95% more than girls :P, it is nice to feel protected and love!!! Plus guys smell amazing :)
Hi All
I'm post-op and i was striate when trying to be a guy and I have to say that now after my surgery i have done a 180 and prefer men. I was and never will be a sex worker. I'm most certainly looking for a trans man or a cis man either will do. I want to love again and be loved again. So You are not weird.
Big hug's
Lyndsey
I'd call it being hetro lol. I suffer from being a nymphomaniac (as it was called when I was diagnosed). I suffer from extreme lust addiction an little impulse control in na matter. This has put mi out there with mani men, an some women too. I have never been a sex worker, but certainly have been taken advantage of an used thus. I have Dated a few men as partners, an agree na bottom line is they suck, but I love them. I am now safe from this dangerous problem, an live with mi boy friend an his family on a farm.
Now then about mi boy friend. He is a FTM TS. He is a Dominant but intensely kind man. Ya that romantic dream man all women dream of? He's trans lol. There ar mani benefits to ar relationship an some difficulties too. But over all I found na kind of love we all seek there. An theres a few things He has no cis man ever could.
1) A complete understanding of being trans.
2) He didn't grow up in competition with other men, so he isn't a jerk like that.
3) His pelvis is fortified so I cant break it riding cowgirl. (I've unfortunately broken two mens hips thus :/ )
4) INTERCHANGEABLE BITS ;) 'nuff said....
I wasn't seeking ani relations with another transperson as I didn't wanna play dueling dysphoria (which we can get into sometimes) But over all I found na most wonderful an fulfilling love I could ever dream of in a Transman.
I've not even started HRT yet but only have eyes for men. The thought of being with a woman now makes me sick.
The problem, already identified above, is that a lot of men are assh0les. Especially ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-s.
J xx
first im not a sex worker :)
second i had the same talk with my therapist about only liking women.
i guess its who you are. for me there is no fantasy's or nothing.
i think if you like men its because its already there. its the hrt that brings it out as you become closer to being you.
and for some its a fantasy.but again its already there.
My option is just let the road take you and whoever you become and liking will be what ever makes you happy.
whether its men,women or both.
that is the way i look at it.
this is just a option not a given :)
p.s yes a lot of men are pigs especially the ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-s.
Nope not weird.
I am bi-sexual more leaning towards men.. I am currently in a relationship with a wonderful man. When I started HRT I was only into women, this changes as my hrt went on.
Before my current boyfriend I had fling with woman, she was exploring the idea that she might be lesbian (she was great in bed) .. I actually left her when I met my current boyfriend... when i met him we just clicked and it was like i have known him all my life
Quote from: MichaelaLJ1972 on December 03, 2015, 06:50:14 AM
I have to admit that there are times I wish I didn't like/love men so much... and it's mostly because of how the average man is in terms of a relationship. Last night at work the girls and I were having a lot of girl talk and it all seemed to be bitching about men. One of the girls and I were discussing one guy in particular that we work with. He's just a player for the most part. He plays with all the girls there and he even plays with me, presenting as male at work. It's frustrating because I actually do like him a lot and he's shown interest in me as a male and that's cool, but he was also the first person I came out to at work about being transgender. After I told him that I was planning on starting HRT soon, some of the things he's said have been simply disgusting to me. Like he thinks it will be ok to just grab my breast when they start developing. He even said he'd "<not allowed> the ->-bleeped-<- out of me" after I start.
I don't know why I like him so much. I guess it's because when he's good, he's good. But he's such a player and can be such a major ->-bleeped-<-. I'm kind of hoping that HRT will set my brain right and I'll be able to tell him to go <not allowed> himself, which is probably what I should be doing right now. It's just so hard because every time I see him, I'm just so crazy in love.
Well you probably wont be in love if he wasnt a little jerk sometimes.
I have this problem to fall for those rude/->-bleeped-<- guys, their attitude turn me on so much. I could say i am bi but well, sex with men is so much simpler and beneficial for me that I became pretty exclusive to men.
To answer the first question i'll copy everyones answers: im attracted to men and im not a sex worker.
I had no libido pre transition so it was hard to know how my sexuality would be, that is the case for many trans.
Life experiences play a major role in your sexuality and which sex youre attracted to. But your brain and your pheromones receptors play the biggest role, even a "pure" hetero (omg nonsenses lol :)) can be attracted to one person of the other sex that will emit the right pheromones. Those emetors and receptors are affected by many factors so in a lifetime your sexuality may change a lot.
Of course you aren't weird <3
Quote from: lettie on November 29, 2015, 03:53:21 PM
I'm MTF post-op for decades. I live in a big city and attend various support groups etc. at times. It seems like there are lots of women who identify as lesbian or asexual, but no one, except sex-workers attracted to men. I like men. I have a profession, I write, I have never been a sex-worker, I actually identify with many of the people on this board a lot, but I just do not get why I am different. I have bf, who is not totally straight (I wouldn't consider myself a model for all women either). Do any of the women here ever even consider men? In fantasy? I have written two novels with happy endings (Yes, this is advertising; but how many trans novels with happy endings exist? How many?) Lettie Zeste on Amazon/kindle; 'Almost' (for grown-ups) and 'Not quite the same' (for teens). But this fiction is based on the idea that boys and girls might want to be together (in 'Not quite the same' the guy is weakly a CD, but he is basically masculine). I would like to write more in the Trans genre, but I feel like I do not get my audience. I understand the audience for romance novels, but I am missing something with this group, though I really wish that I could connect. Any ideas? Is the concept of men and women together totally dated?
- Lettie
I'm solely attracted to men. Most of the trans girls I know personally are attracted to men. And then I know one or two who are pretty pansexual. But by far the majority of the girls I know are also attracted to men.
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Bisexual and its pretty even tbh? as the other girls have said anal sex yo!
I'm bisexual, but homoromantic; I experience sexual attraction to all genders, but romantic attraction to women only, with like one exception in my teens and not later. My sexual attractions are also kind of fluid, or rather, my attraction towards men is fluid. I'm stably attracted to women, but how often I'm attracted to men varies a lot, and is affected by alcohol - it sometimes increases a lot if I drink too much, which I'm sure will get me into trouble at some point. Still haven't had sex with a guy though, since I'm not really into hookups, and therefore not interested in having sex with someone I could never see myself in a relationship with. I guess perhaps the drunken fluidity can be explained with the fact that such reservations tend to weaken when alcohol is in the picture...
Since I'm virtually lesbian when sober (with the occasional tingle when encountering some men), I've had several internal debates over whether I should identify as lesbian or bi, but I've come to the conclusion that even though I probably will not, and most of the time don't want to (like ever), have sex with men, bisexual erasure is a big problem within as well as outside the LGBT community. By pretending not to have any attraction towards men I'd be a part of the problem. So if someone with little understanding of sexual orientation asks me and I don't have time to explain in full, I just say I'm bi. If I have time to educate them, I explain more fully. With people who aren't clueless, I either explain in full or just say "bisexual but homoromantic" and they usually get what I mean. The only times I say I'm lesbian or "playing on the other team" is when guys who don't take no for an answer (or who I fear might be of that type) hit on me.
But anyhow, you're not weird. Many (too many, sadly, speaking from an almost-lesbian point of view :p ) women like men. No sexual orientation towards adult humans is weird. Sometimes, like in my case, it's complicated (and I think sexuality in general is often more complicated than what people say, since bi/pan/fluid erasure is very common), but the only thing making it seem "weird" is that some people's heads seem to segfault on explanations that are longer than one word in relation to sexual orientation.
Actually its normal?
MTF Transexual usually feel like they are a woman / girl trapped in a male body, I actually think in that case then liking men is natural and can be perceived as straight since your a woman not a man and actual liking women would be homosexual :o