Well, let me start this off by saying that this person and I are in a, ahem, a BDSM relationship. We met on a social media site, and we hit it off. Now, this person's as sweet and respectful as the day is long, but I still want to know, is there any kind of red flags or warning signs I should be looking for, like, to warn of a potential abuser? Because I heard that they're unsettlingly common, especially in the BDSM community and especially to trans women.
Thanks in advance to anyone who can share with me some knowledge.
-You might meet in a public place first, and get to know each other
-You might get to know each other better, and see how they are as personality... are they kind of balanced, considerate, and trustworthy ?
-many people are not only dominant but also versatile. You might ask. Versatile persons know both sides and might be more considerate.
-negotiate safe words and demand they be respected.
What would put me off is cruelty... and kind of unbalanced behaviour... and drug use...
well...
wish you a balanced relationship...
take care... I'd say don't go too far... I'd stick to a bit of teasing ...
hugs
Quote from: Laura_7 on December 08, 2015, 05:23:52 PM
-You might meet in a public place first, and get to know each other
-You might get to know each other better, and see how they are as personality... are they kind of balanced, considerate, and trustworthy ?
-many people are not only dominant but also versatile. You might ask. Versatile persons know both sides and might be more considerate.
-negotiate safe words and demand they be respected.
What would put me off is cruelty... and kind of unbalanced behaviour... and drug use...
well...
wish you a balanced relationship...
take care... I'd say don't go too far... I'd stick to a bit of teasing ...
hugs
I can see that. They say they're a Switch, which means they do both domme and sub, but we decided that they'll be the domme, and I the sub. They've been willing to negotiate with me about some tasks, but we ain't met in person yet, although I do really want to do that.
Thank you for your advice. And, don't worry, they tease me plenty.
Well, that relationship lasted about as long as a DumDum pop. Oh, well. I leave the relationship with more knowledge and experience than before, so that's a silver lining or something.
Quote from: ThatGirl2147 on January 02, 2016, 11:22:31 PM
Well, that relationship lasted about as long as a DumDum pop. Oh, well. I leave the relationship with more knowledge and experience than before, so that's a silver lining or something.
*hugs*
Would it be an option to look maybe on OKCupid or PlentyOfFish for people you can click with and have a feeling you like ?
You might yourself look for a few interesting profiles and contact people...
I'd say just filter out people you have not a good feeling with... you can always nicely say no...
keep on keeping on...
you will find someone eventually
*hugs*
Quote from: Laura_7 on January 03, 2016, 08:35:18 AM
*hugs*
Would it be an option to look maybe on OKCupid or PlentyOfFish for people you can click with and have a feeling you like ?
You might yourself look for a few interesting profiles and contact people...
I'd say just filter out people you have not a good feeling with... you can always nicely say no...
keep on keeping on...
you will find someone eventually
*hugs*
Eh, I ain't too worried about it. I mean, if I find someone, I find someone. If not, then there's no sense worrying about it. Thanks for your concern.