Hey there,
Over the past 10 months a lot has happened. I finally came out to myself and I now attend a youth group every week which is amazing! Another thing that happened is that today I came out to my vice principal, she took it super well and is going to help me through the coming out process. Since I'm already out to the students all I need to do is tell the teachers but before I can do that I need to tell my parents.
I'm about 90% sure that they already know I'm just too awkward to tell them. I've been meaning to for a really long time and with the new year just around the corner I'd like to start it feeling better. I'm not close with either of my parents but I can't stand having to listen to my birth name and being referred to with she/her pronouns. Does anyone have any tips on how to come out to them? I've written a letter I'm just worried about giving it to them.
Thank you and I hope you all have a beautiful day!
-Shay
Well a letter sounds like a great idea, and congratulations on your progress at school! :) However, you mentioned that you are not close with either of them. I would recommend having a plan of what the WORST thing that could happen, and your reaction to that, the BEST thing, and a moderate/most realistic reaction of your parents and how you would react to that. Planning is key, but on the letter front, that sounds like such a good idea! Good luck!
:)
A letter can certainly help you get your thoughts in order. That doesn't mean you have to give it to them, you could refer to it if you feel a face to face discussion is a better approach - the letter would make sure you didn't leave anything out.
Don't expect them to understand or to accept what you are telling them. Do expect there is a chance that they will get upset. Usually coming out to close family members is a long, long process. They need to process the information (even if they are supportive) and may have many doubts themselves.
I'd suggest you tell them clearly what you would like to do and how you would do it (what's involved) and how they can help you in that process.
Quote from: IrishPotato on December 09, 2015, 04:09:21 PM
I'm not close with either of my parents but I can't stand having to listen to my birth name and being referred to with she/her pronouns.
Understandable, but don't expect that will change especially if they are not supportive or accepting. They might come around but it is a struggle for many people with their families.