Okay so I know there is a thread about this somewhere so I apologize. I couldn't find it. I really need some advice on how to change my appearance to look more masculine, haircuts etc. right now
I'm pre-everything and my face is just so darn feminine. I want to look masculine with a bit of femininity but mostly masculine. Here's a few
Pictures, please help if you can. Going clothes shopping this weekend. Hopefully I can pick up some things to help. Blargh. So frustrated with my face right now >.< (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimages.tapatalk-cdn.com%2F15%2F12%2F16%2F0beeb1e92a4caf9c3d08dd76be2c77b4.jpg&hash=cdf163dd2f3702597c5458c819303a21cdfa1195)(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimages.tapatalk-cdn.com%2F15%2F12%2F16%2F69c1fb708446ad332c9d4c615f45e599.jpg&hash=56384add1f480732cc1b1bcdb2d81fbf498dbdf0)(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimages.tapatalk-cdn.com%2F15%2F12%2F16%2Fbe9e0ccb55b49bcf1bcb34b4693c057e.jpg&hash=460613aebb426a00bbfb5b18309eb1ef1df3c9ad)
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Please take my comments as coming from an older woman and not use to young men's fashion.
Your haircut is quite feminine but when you get the hair away from your ears it looks a lot more masculine. There is also a 'look' common to all transgender people. As an AFAB you have developed a way of holding your head which is quite feminine, it (the look) looks a lot more masculine in the final pic - a more aggressive look.
You have good features and yes they are feminine but not overtly so, you look like a handsome man in pic #3. Nothing wrong in being handsome!
Certainly T and stubble it produces will take the feminine edge off.
As for style, I suggest looking at pics of male models to develop your style. I say that as if you were AMAB you would certainly be a candidate for a male model. Good looks, chiselled, with good androgyny.
Not sure how many guys go for the softer hair colours, it looks great, but more aggressive colours may be more masculinising. Maybe think about modifying the fringe, it softens your face, you seem to have a high forehead which many guys have (as do women) but women tend to hide it, guys seem to empathise it.
As for clothes, you look a jeans and T-shirt guy. Casual but sharp would be my call.
But I have to say I'm 60 so my opinion on how young men look is probably so old fashioned.
I will say that from the young FtM guys I know you fit straight in and when T works its magic on you I think you will look a pretty awesome guy. Not sure if you are into building muscle, but a guy like you with muscles is going to just look awesome and a room stopper.
I don't know if you are into women but if you are be ready to beat them off with sticks :laugh:
Quote from: Cindy on December 17, 2015, 01:26:44 AM
Please take my comments as coming from an older woman and not use to young men's fashion.
Your haircut is quite feminine but when you get the hair away from your ears it looks a lot more masculine. There is also a 'look' common to all transgender people. As an AFAB you have developed a way of holding your head which is quite feminine, it (the look) looks a lot more masculine in the final pic - a more aggressive look.
You have good features and yes they are feminine but not overtly so, you look like a handsome man in pic #3. Nothing wrong in being handsome!
Certainly T and stubble it produces will take the feminine edge off.
As for style, I suggest looking at pics of male models to develop your style. I say that as if you were AMAB you would certainly be a candidate for a male model. Good looks, chiselled, with good androgyny.
Not sure how many guys go for the softer hair colours, it looks great, but more aggressive colours may be more masculinising. Maybe think about modifying the fringe, it softens your face, you seem to have a high forehead which many guys have (as do women) but women tend to hide it, guys seem to empathise it.
As for clothes, you look a jeans and T-shirt guy. Casual but sharp would be my call.
But I have to say I'm 60 so my opinion on how young men look is probably so old fashioned.
I will say that from the young FtM guys I know you fit straight in and when T works its magic on you I think you will look a pretty awesome guy. Not sure if you are into building muscle, but a guy like you with muscles is going to just look awesome and a room stopper.
I don't know if you are into women but if you are be ready to beat them off with sticks :laugh:
Hah this is going to sound a bit ridiculous but you've made me very happy. Thank you -__- I really needed the positive feedback. I've been feeling like my face is a lost cause right now but thank you for the encouragement.
Hugs
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Your face is definitely not a lost cause. I have to agree with Cindy completely, but then I'm closer to her age than yours.
Guys don't usually wear nose rings or studs...
(I'm not saying take it out, just making an observation)
You look handsome, I'd kill for your cheekbones :). In regards to looking even more male than you do already I find that an undercut hairstyle works really well eg. shaved sides and long on top so you can create a quiff. It balances the face to look square. Just make sure the sideburns are square.
When it comes the clothes I think baseball style shirts work really well, something like this. https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=baseball+shirts&client=ms-android-orange-gb&source=android-browser&prmd=sivn&source=lnms&tbm=shop&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwj29JDul-DJAhXG1BoKHaqyBX0Q_AUIBygB#spd=16171059265278043127&spud=0. The contrasting colour makes your shoulders look broader plus if you rolled up the sleeves you look you'd have some muscle. I also really like boxer briefs as they do a great job of keeping your packer in place but also look really masculine; but can also look quite fem as you can usually get them in many different designs and colours.
As for tshirt just make sure they're quite tight and not too bright.
Hi! I think your face has attractive feminine and masculine qualities. You'll notice that in picture 1 you look a lot more feminine than picture 3. As the others have said, attitude, demeanor and body language play a huge role in how we are perceived. I'm not massively up on guy hair styles, but I think faux-hawks look really good. If you keep your awesome hair colour with it, I think you would have a more masculine look, but with a nice fem edge :)
If you are considering T, I think you will have really positive results :) Good luck clothes shopping this weekend X
I'm mtf, and always looked butch in a regular haircut, my dad tried too make me look like a boy. When I grew my hair long I looked fem, so to create balance I dry shaved for 6 yrs til the facial hair came in and grew a mustache, my mustache defined my male side, and still does for when I shave people take double takes. Jeans and oversized t shirt would help,and ditch the hair coloring. I don't wear tight fitting shirts period for I grew breasts during puberty and tight t shirt show to much. I hope this helps.
Quote from: Mitternacht on December 17, 2015, 01:01:14 AM
Okay so I know there is a thread about this somewhere so I apologize. I couldn't find it. I really need some advice on how to change my appearance to look more masculine, haircuts etc. right now
I'm pre-everything and my face is just so darn feminine. I want to look masculine with a bit of femininity but mostly masculine. Here's a few
Pictures, please help if you can. Going clothes shopping this weekend. Hopefully I can pick up some things to help. Blargh. So frustrated with my face right now >.<
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimages.tapatalk-cdn.com%2F15%2F12%2F16%2F0beeb1e92a4caf9c3d08dd76be2c77b4.jpg&hash=cdf163dd2f3702597c5458c819303a21cdfa1195)(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimages.tapatalk-cdn.com%2F15%2F12%2F16%2F69c1fb708446ad332c9d4c615f45e599.jpg&hash=56384add1f480732cc1b1bcdb2d81fbf498dbdf0)(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimages.tapatalk-cdn.com%2F15%2F12%2F16%2Fbe9e0ccb55b49bcf1bcb34b4693c057e.jpg&hash=460613aebb426a00bbfb5b18309eb1ef1df3c9ad)
Your face is a bit feminine, but it's not the main thing. The biggest thing is your hairstyle and makeup.
Your hair color being seen as feminine by many in our A4-society. So I wouldn't recommend you to color your hair that way. If you color your hair in natural color, it's not a big deal. But blue, pink, green and other non-natural hair color is feminine. Your haircut is very girly as well. My best advice is; cut it. Cut it short. It may sound boring, but you would pass better as more masculine in the society with short hair. I doesn't mean you should buzz it. But I think a regular short haircut most guys have. Next thing that make you appear more feminine is your makeup. I know some guys uses makeup too. But since you're more feminine in your face, makeup would make you even more feminine. So if you choose to not use makeup, it would help you a lot.
If you're a person who want to transistion in the medical ways with hormones, surgeries etc, it would help you even more. Testosterone do much stuff with you, so you would look even more masculine.
My advices:* Natural hair color - not non-natural hair dye
* Shorter and more boyish/guy haircut
* No makeup
* Transistion, maybe... - Testosterone etc.
So I notice a lot of people mentioning hair color and since I have dyed my hair unnatural colors a lot, I figured I would chime in.
I go to an art school and it is perfectly normal to see both guys and girls with unnatural colors in their hair. I actually knew many more men than women with colored hair. At the time I dyed my hair, I was 2-6 months on T I believe.
I've always been pretty masculine, and pre-T I had no issue passing. I was about 75% at the time. As I started T, my passing inched up to probably 80%.
Then I dyed my hair, a red that was slightly darker than bright bright red. At the time, I didn't see hair dye as a gendered thing at ALL, it never contributed to gendering any person I saw. But pretty much overnight my passing dropped to 0%. Never. Not once would strangers get it right. Anyone who knew me as a guy didn't understand how anyone could see me as male but every single stranger did. I posted on several websites and all with the same conclusion- the only thing we can think of is your hair color.
Honestly it really hurt my feelings, and I refused to believe it for a while. But the longer I didn't pass, the more my self esteem took a hit. I eventually cut all the red out of my hair because it wasn't washing out no matter how hard I tried and it was just like the symbol of how sucky my life was at the time.
Once I cut the color out, my passing spiked back up to 80%
Now I've been on T for 15 months, and my passing is at like 99% and I'm finally considering dying my hair again.
Pretty much what I'm saying is it might seem ridiculous that color would have anything to do with passing, and I didn't believe it myself, but it doesn't change the fact that that seems to be what stopped my passing. If you want to keep the color, I'd say maybe try something dark and closer to a natural color, like a dark blue or a red closer to natural than firetruck as opposed to teals, pinks/purples, or other bright colors.
Also, I agree with what Cindy said, that getting the hair away from your ears helped. Guys generally have the hair in front of their ears cut squarely and short, while women tend to have it longer and in a more triangular shape. Out of your 3 pictures, the third I think looks most masculine- it's the hair as well as your expression.
Thanks for the advice on the hair colour ^ I'll think about it. I think my main issue is that I want to look like a feminine guy( longer hair etc) but I think I may just cut it shorter and then wait until I'm on T to start growing it out again.. I dunno. It's a weird thing I know but I just want to meet the picture in my mind.
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I actually like your look. Its very rave and scifi.
I say get an undercut, keep it long on top, and go with a nose hoop instead of an Xtina stud. My opinion.
There's probably a more masculine style you can get with your hair - perhaps more emo? Not sure if that's the correct term for the cut, but oddly enough when I see it on men it looks masculine enough, with a hint of feminine.
Having both sides of your hair even or symmetrical as in the first pic seems to be a more feminine trait in hairstyles, men tend to have parts on one side if they have similar hairstyle to you there, with the hair moving to one side rather than evenly distributed on both sides. Colorful hair like that I see more on women than men but I suppose no reason you can't have it.
You can get away with the hair colour + piercings because that kind of 'alternative' style is not exclusive to females...
I would second the haircut thing - when boys have fringes/bangs, the ratio to hair length to fringe length is closer, in that the longer sides and back of the hair are only a little longer, and the overall cut is rarely as much as shoulder length... when guys i knew grew their hair out longer than that they also grew out their fringes.
Quote from: dentistsandthedark on December 17, 2015, 06:17:50 AM
Guys don't usually wear nose rings or studs...
(I'm not saying take it out, just making an observation)
I wouldn't say that, but I do think as far as guys with nose piercings go rings are a lot more common than studs.
Quote from: Wild Flower on December 17, 2015, 11:47:40 PM
I say get an undercut, keep it long on top, and go with a nose hoop instead of an Xtina stud. My opinion.
I would second the undercut suggestion. My brother, who is also a pre-everything FTM and always has his hair dyed bright colors, recently got his hair cut like this and is really happy with it.
Like others have said, I think it helps to have it shorter around the ears, even if you want to keep it longer up top. Without the hair cupping around the sides of your face it will also help it look more masculine.
As far as makeup and your face shape, you could look into contouring to emphasize angles.
I would say lose the hair colour and maybe get a more ''masculine'' hairstyle , but thats about it :)
You have to accept that sometimes feminine cis guys who are very thin and alternative get misgendered, too, especially if they are short. If they are extemely masculine in their appearance then they often get accused of being gay, simply for having unnatural hair color/long hair/piercings. Those things are considered fem, so you just have to pick what is more important to you: expressing yourself as a fem guy or passing. If passing is more important then wait until you are on T to dye your hair blue and have long locks. (Though understand that if you are short and small boned anf you have long blue hair then nothing short of having a beard will probably keep you from being misgendered occasionally, and even then you may be misgendered from the back--I have seen it happen to cis guys). If you aren't too worried about passing then just do what makes you happiest!
In my opinion your biggest problem beyond the hair is definitely the way you seem to hold yourself along with your soft jawline. In general I find that FTMs tend to pass better in pictures than in reality before T, so my guess is that you'll have trouble passing (as do I) in three dimensions due to your effeminate features (I have them, too!). The thing the helps me the most is how I hold myself. Even if I don't pass, no one EVER questions my masculine name or wonders why I want to be called "he"--and I rarely get m'amed or sirred because despite my feminine features they just aren't sure because I don't hold myself like a woman at all. Those things are mostly habits, and I was able to adjust my behavior fairly quickly. I no longer cross my legs or tilt my head down or speak higher or hold my arms close to my body or any of the things considered more womanly, and it has really upped my passing. Now that's not to say I pass at all--sadly I am too old to pass as a teenage boy, and too pretty in the face but slim in the body to pass as a grown man--but I at least fall into the "what the heck?" Category for most people, which is better than getting gendered as female all the time! :)
Hair would definitely be a start. Look through photos of mens hairdos online,make sure they match your face though. Don't want to go for a short cut with for a round face etc
I got my hair cut short (was originally poytailed constantly) and what a difference it made,to the way it made me feel/view myself,to the way other people viewed me,it was liberating. As for studs,piercings etc that's your choice,men wear them too. I think I've had the added bonus of NEVER looking girly,but I'd suggest your hair getting cut short will make you view yourself differently. I could be wrong but it's only hair right,it you don't like it,itll grow back [emoji4]
Cindy is spot on with everything. Every. Single. Thing. Spot on.
As the others said, if being misgendered in public is bothersome to you, lose the hair color. It doesn't matter what is trending with kids when it comes to anyone besides those kids. Hair color= girl to the general public (unless all the other social/physical cues are spot as male).
Quote from: FtMitch on December 20, 2015, 10:27:07 AM
sadly I am too old to pass as a teenage boy, and too pretty in the face but slim in the body to pass as a grown man--but I at least fall into the "what the heck?" Category for most people
This is me, brother!
After 5 years on T, I still have difficulties! (see quote above)
So, all I can offer for a suggestion would be the haircut... I find that the right haircut can be very helpful, and it is not the shortest cut that works the best for me. Short and clean up and around the ears and on the sides, but long and shaggy on top gets me the best look. I see a lot of younger dudes with colors, mostly riding skateboards :laugh: so, if color is your thing you could make it work. You may just start thinking about the possibility that the vision you have of yourself in your head may never be what you can achieve with the body you were born in...but always do what you can to keep moving closer. Not trying to be a downer, but more of a realist. I wish I would have been more prepared at the onset of my journey to accept the things that T cannot do for me.
So I got my hair cut a lot shorter and dyed it darker after some of the suggestions. Ordered a new ring for my nose as I do think the stud is a bit too feminine but hadn't gotten here. Also, tried on my partner's glasses and he said they helped a bit, even though I don't need glasses so I tried a cheep cosmetic pair. What do you guys think? (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimages.tapatalk-cdn.com%2F16%2F01%2F02%2F0709c268ee861b9fbd7a9aa345aa13f0.jpg&hash=5c38b5aa7c609d3bd6428316b5636aa5eefcfd7b) sorry for the horrible photo quality
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Blue hair just looks feme to me.
Quote from: Mitternacht on January 03, 2016, 01:28:03 AM
So I got my hair cut a lot shorter and dyed it darker after some of the suggestions. Ordered a new ring for my nose as I do think the stud is a bit too feminine but hadn't gotten here. Also, tried on my partner's glasses and he said they helped a bit, even though I don't need glasses so I tried a cheep cosmetic pair. What do you guys think? (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimages.tapatalk-cdn.com%2F16%2F01%2F02%2F0709c268ee861b9fbd7a9aa345aa13f0.jpg&hash=5c38b5aa7c609d3bd6428316b5636aa5eefcfd7b) sorry for the horrible photo quality
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Sorry, dude. You still doesn't pass for me. If you really want to pass, I recommend you a natural hair color and a short haircut. Maybe a undercut or something more macho. Short hair is what I recommend you, not long. Especially not dyed. If you had a very masculine face and body, you could try out hair dye, long hair etc. But now, you wouldn't pass.
But I look too feminine too. Therefor I always goes for my natural black hair and short hair. If I'm starting at T when I grow up and becomes more masculine, I can grow a bit longer hair. Especially if I'm able to grow beard etc. But it's many years in the future. But I'm happy with short hair. And as long I'm pre-everything, I'm always going for short hair.
Quote from: Mitternacht on January 03, 2016, 01:28:03 AM
So I got my hair cut a lot shorter and dyed it darker after some of the suggestions. Ordered a new ring for my nose as I do think the stud is a bit too feminine but hadn't gotten here. Also, tried on my partner's glasses and he said they helped a bit, even though I don't need glasses so I tried a cheep cosmetic pair. What do you guys think? (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimages.tapatalk-cdn.com%2F16%2F01%2F02%2F0709c268ee861b9fbd7a9aa345aa13f0.jpg&hash=5c38b5aa7c609d3bd6428316b5636aa5eefcfd7b) sorry for the horrible photo quality
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More than your physical attributes it's your very feminine body language and poses that throw me off.
I don't want to sound discouraging but this picture looks more feminine than the previous ones. As another poster said the body language/pose you have here looks feminine. As I think I mentioned before rounded and/or symmetrical hairstyles tend to look more feminine, to me at least.
I guess it depends on the style people wear where you live but around here guys of any age all have natural hair color and cut very short. While I occasionally see a guy with longer hair I have never ever seen one with wild colored hair.
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I look better with slightly long hair (last time I got it short was a disaster) and I like the colour so I guess I'm just kinda doomed until i start T, because I'm not really willing to change them. I guess it's not captured well here but I do actually pass fairly often which is weird because it's kind of obvious. Maybe it's the way I dress. I don't know.
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I've gotta say, as someone who used to color their hair like that all the time, I do love the blue. However, it unfortunately is probably bringing out your feminine features. Early in transition, natural hair colors probably work best, and then once facial changes start to happen, it will be easier to pull off bright colors without looking female (although it also always depends on the person).
You've got strong, masculine eyebrows, so I think if you were to get rid of the hair that falls in your face, it would help. As much as I like your hair, the cut does definitely scream "female" --but don't cut it just to look masculine; wear what you feel comfortable in, and one day the changes will bring it all together. Because who knows, you could cut your hair all off in an attempt to look masculine, and end up still looking feminine and also not enjoying your hair. Do you, and eventually everything will find its place. :)
As much as I loved dying my hair, I don't think I could pull it off at all right now. I'm waiting until I at least have facial hair before trying colors again.
Btw, the most recent pic, your hair looks like a wig, and I think that's awesome. The cut and color look very deliberate and on point. So even if you don't look too masculine, keep doing you. The worst thing you could do is lose yourself in an attempt to fit into other peoples' perception of a man.
If you feel as if your face does not match your gender preference, it would seem to me as if you would not want to draw attention to it. I am definitely not of the colored hair and piercing generation, and when I see it on the streets, my immediate thought is " Now why did they do that to themselves." Only after having my focus drawn to the face do I do make a gender decision.
You may very well look quite in place among your peers, but to the general public, you would draw attention to your face with that presentation. Which is just the opposite of what I try to do.
Quote from: Bimmer Guy on December 22, 2015, 05:24:49 PM
Hair color= girl to the general public (unless all the other social/physical cues are spot as male).
I wouldn't really agree with that last bit. I know a guy who has sort of short/medium length purple hair (that's balding quite a bit lately, even) but further has a very masculine V shaped body, dresses masculine, is absolutely 100% not mistakable for a girl especially in the face, social cues are all completely male and yet he still often gets misgendered, and it's all only because of the hair color. It's pretty much just "unnatural hair color = girl" to the general public.
I like the blue hair on you, especially the darker shade but it dose make passing a bit harder at first going all out with the bright hair colors. If you were a client in my salon chair I would suggest two things first. Add black or another dark neutral color as the primary shade to your hair and just leave a pop of color to come through underneath. For the cut I'd shorten up the back and sides a bit but leave more edges blunt and give the back a still a blended choppy texture (vs a fine razor cut textured look that comes across more feminine) so as not to take away from your personal style too much, maybe a bit shorter in the front too but I'm a fan of the longer bangs on alternative looks. I wouldn't cut your hair too short, that would leave nothing to camouflage the features you want to hide for now. The goal of a good haircut is to bring out your best features. When trans finding a good stylist that will bring out the masculine features and help blend out or altogether hide the feminine ones helps a lot but that's easier said than done. To me you rock your style well and as others already said have great facial structure so there's plenty of room to work with.
I'm in the same boat being used to an alternative look which on the plus side might have you read as at least more androgynous at first until you start T but I know that probably isn't what you're going for. To me personally being read androgynous and getting a 50-50 or 25-75 is better than not passing at all though, that's pretty much where I'm at right now.
For your softer jawline check out some male contouring makeup videos on youtube if you wear makeup or are open to the idea of trying it out. It really helped me sharpen my features once I got the hang of it but I'm not at all a masculine guy to begin with and can't seem to give up makeup, for me it's just face art though I'm sure others would shudder at the thought so do whatever you're comfortable with there. If the ring in your nose doesn't make much difference try a clear glass retainer to hide it all together until you feel more confident about passing if that's your primary goal right now.
If you're going femme with one aspect of your hair, I'd recommend masculinizing another aspect, eg:
Having coloured hair, seen as femme, and a more masculine cut (shirt back and sides with a fringe may suit)
or
A natural hair colour with a more femme cut
I've had a ton of different colours and I found that my rate of passing only tended to change when my hair was longer and coloured, whereas when I had a more typically masculine cut and it was bright green I had no issues.
Either way, try not to focus too much on passing, because if you're self conscious to an extent where you're completely changing your appearance and you're not happy, it'll probably show, and one thing I've learnt is that confidence does wonders.
In my opinion your facial structure seems androgynous leaning masculine, and if your hair could compliment that I think you would pass.