Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Topic started by: NekoBoy on December 21, 2015, 11:47:44 PM

Title: Uncomfortable With My Situation
Post by: NekoBoy on December 21, 2015, 11:47:44 PM
First off, I'm new here. Hi!
Anyway, I'm FTM haven't started T. Probably won't for a while, but I dress the part and certainly act it.
So here's my issue. I told my Mom and BFF, who are really supportive of me. I don't think I can tell my Dad (at least not yet) because since I still like guys, this kind of makes me gay. And gay people weird him out. I'm also really close with my grandmother, but she's a bit set in her ways, so I can't tell her yet either.
The main issue here is: I go to a private school. A GIRL's private school.
It's the most annoying thing in the world!
They make us wear skirts and we can't dye or hair... Ugh! I just feel like I don't belong.
I mean, I like the teachers. And I do have friends there. But I feel so out of place.
I want to ask my mom to transfer. But because my dad doesn't know the situation, I know that won't happen.
I'm pretty sure there isn't a set solution for this. But I wanted to at least talk about it with people.
Title: Re: Uncomfortable With My Situation
Post by: Ms Grace on December 22, 2015, 01:11:38 AM
You could always ask for a transfer without you being trans as the reason for it.
Title: Re: Uncomfortable With My Situation
Post by: NekoBoy on December 22, 2015, 06:45:22 AM
Quote from: Ms Grace on December 22, 2015, 01:11:38 AM
You could always ask for a transfer without you being trans as the reason for it.
Yeah, but problem is, my dad would ask why. I can't make up some story because I'm sure I'll be caught.
Btw, thanks for your input. I appreciate it.  :)
Title: Re: Uncomfortable With My Situation
Post by: suzifrommd on December 22, 2015, 06:54:23 AM
Is there someone you can talk to - an adult who might be an ally who can help explain it to your parents. Is there a counselor or a teacher at your school you can trust? Perhaps a family member or friend of the family? Or maybe there is a PFLAG chapter in your area you can make contact with. I'm just thinking it might help for your father to hear it from an adult who can help you explain it to him.
Title: Re: Uncomfortable With My Situation
Post by: ashtonpuff on December 22, 2015, 10:36:12 AM
I would say wait until you come out to your father then ask

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Title: Re: Uncomfortable With My Situation
Post by: Laura_7 on December 22, 2015, 02:27:31 PM
I like your Name NekoBoy...
and I also like cats...

here are a few resources that might be shown:
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,197523.msg1756901.html#msg1756901

One is a letter from an accepting dad. Parts of it might be used.

You have quiet a few options.
You might come out to your dad...
you might ask fot a good gender therapist, to help you along...
or you might ask for a therapist for emotional reasons, and look for someone who has, amongst others, gender on their list... and ask them to suppport you in coming out...
or, as others have suggested, you might ask a teacher you trust, a school counselor you trust, someone from plannedparenthood, a lgbt center or PFLAG for support...


have a big *hug* and meow....
Title: Re: Uncomfortable With My Situation
Post by: NekoBoy on December 22, 2015, 05:13:13 PM
Thanks everybody!   :D
I'm gonna discuss with my mom on how to come out to my dad. And I'll see what happens from there...