Hello friends.
It's roughly an hour until the end of Christmas day by me. I guess it went better than my thoughts were expecting it to be. I'm glad its still something that I can enjoy with my family. Who knows in the next few years how that will pan out, but no sense in getting all worked up about that. For now, my family likely thinks that I've abandoned the idea, but just had to put it back on hold for a bit. Such is life I guess. I'll get to start my journey eventually.
My mind is always constantly running crazy with the trans thoughts and seeing it more and more in the world just often makes me wonder. I know for many of you who are either in full, partial or nowhere transition also have to deal with this for this time of the year. It really pains me to think that people would be abandoned in these great times of family togetherness. Family is what November and December are basically all about. thanksgiving, Christmas, Hanukkah, or whatever other holidays exist. Being there with people you love, but suddenly thrown being trans into the mix, and now none will support you. People say stupid things like why can't you just be gay. How could they accept one form of us, but not the other. It's ridiculous. A family should love all members of the family, regardless of what they look like, act, or express themselves.
For those of you without anything or anyone for this time frame. I will keep you in my thoughts always. You are all stronger than I am. I can hardly keep myself together, let alone having to deal with all of this too. I probably couldn't do it. You are all so brave and strong. Keep up the desire to live and you'll find the right path soon. I know it. I wish for everyone to have a happy christmas, happy holiday, and happy family. Someday we'll get there and this won't be a problem anymore. I promise.
Love you All. Sammi
Dear Sammi,
Thank you for such a nice message.
There is hope. There is always hope.
I just read my diary from 5 years ago. Cindy, struggling, my family around for Christmas, the misgendering, the 'forgetting' my name. The meaningless or insulting gifts.
Now, sure my unaccepting family members struggle; but I'm not going to go away. They now know that and it is their problem.
They accepted my hospitality, they accepted my food; cooked with love and care for the enjoyment of my family.
They now know they have a choice, accept me or leave and don't ever bother to come back.
Sammi, you will reach this, you will have acceptance from those who love you.
In five years time you may be there, wearing a nice dress, feeling happy and content and knowing full well that no matter who thinks what, that Sammi is the young woman she was meant to be.
Cindy
Thanks Sammi. It is sad how many families can't deal with it. I know a lot that can and do but yeah.
Sometimes we have to make the best of what we have, our friends and 'family of choice'.
Best of luck to you with your transition in the new year and all of that.