I finally was able to say out loud what I have been thinking for I don't know even how long.
I came out to someone, it was a therapist, but it was someone. I felt safe, so it all came spilling out, I wish we would have had more time. Going to see her again next week.
Then, my second part of the day, that really put me over the top joyful was the arrival of my first ever dress that I haven't swiped from someone else's closet (moms or wife). Oh, and wig, pumps, bra, panties. It was like Christmas. I couldn't wait, so I rushed home during lunch, and got somewhat dolled up, and looking in the mirror I finally saw me. Even with no makeup, and with the dress not quite fitting, and the pumps being wayyyyy too high. I was me. Suzi. Not this guy I kept seeing in the mirror, who I didn't quite recognize.
I couldn't find the 'what made you happy today' thread on tapatalk so please excuse my happy dance thread here but I am on cloud 9 today. I am so happy that it almost didn't dissipate when had to 'man up' to go back to work where I am nowhere near coming out at.
I still have butterflies of joy in my stomach!
I have more dresses on the way. So excited, hoping for a picture opportunity soon.
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Finally wearing my own clothes was a big moment for me, too! Congrats and welcome to the journey!
congrats
Yes congratulations! Sounds like a great afternoon! Hope the rest of your outfits fit perfectly! :)
I'm happy for you :)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=blvOBnSRfVc
I really need to find a place where I can go and buy some clothes and feel comfortable. I am not there yet to going out in public, and I know a few people who work in the local Amazon warehouse so I don't feel too comfortable ordering stuff from there since I don't have a SO living at my house that I can pawn it off on. I want to try things on, I can't do that on Amazon either, need to find a nice pair of jeans and that is going to be a pain without trying them on
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I buy my stuff at Target, where there's a self-checkout. As for trying stuff on, I haven't the courage yet, although I do try on jeans there.
I'd suggest a road trip to a larger city, hit up one of the malls, and ask for assistance. In my experience, the girls at the mall really enjoy shopping for you. They'll just bring stuff back to your fitting room until you say stop. Even offer their advice on fitment. I have had a few that saw me in the first one and immediately picked out new outfits in sizes that made me feel and look fantastic. Otherwise I have a girl friend come with me and they help with fittings and style.
congratz girl :D
Quote from: ImSuziG on January 13, 2016, 06:25:24 PM
I really need to find a place where I can go and buy some clothes and feel comfortable. I am not there yet to going out in public, and I know a few people who work in the local Amazon warehouse so I don't feel too comfortable ordering stuff from there since I don't have a SO living at my house that I can pawn it off on. I want to try things on, I can't do that on Amazon either, need to find a nice pair of jeans and that is going to be a pain without trying them on
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It really does get easier, a bit of advice, just get to it and dont drag it out so long as we tend to do. You are going to do it... might as well start ASAP.
Yes, the self checkouts at target and walmart are a godsend :)
Also, for me, shopping at big thrift stores saved me alot of money and let me try lots of sizes and styles to find out what works and what doesnt for little money. Around here they have dollar tag days, each piece is a dollar for a specific colored tag. You can go toss 20 things in your cart for 20 bucks and learn a lot about what works and what doesnt. Because in the girl world, alot doesnt work.... and wasting money on new items is hard, Ive been there :)
Good luck and have fun, again, it does get easier to buy stuff. I was mortified at first but it doesnt phase me anymore
It's amazing how telling someone for the first time who you are can be so freeing and bring such joy. Then to be able to be the real you must have been nothing short of amazing. Now you need to hold on to those feelings and continue to move forward and do what makes you happy, whatever road that may be. I am happy you had such a great day!
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I went home after swimming and spinning and spent the night as me, as Suzi. I felt at ease, and if it hadnt been for me constantly refreshing and reading Susan's and binge watching Transparent I would have had a great sleep!
Just saying what has been going on in my head was spectacular, and today I grabbed a composition notebook that was laying around the house and for the first time in my life I am going to try to start journaling to keep track of myself, thoughts, fears, and to document where I am and where I am headed.
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