So, I've been calling around for some therapists in the south east USA.
I heard back from a few, all I have to do is arrange an appointment.
The guy I was going for, Dr. Portney in SC, called me and told me that he doesn't do, "quick access to hormones."
What he meant by that, he explained, is that he conforms to the Harry Benjamin standards of care and is going to make me sit through testing and 3-4 sessions before "possible" putting me on hormone therapy.
And what happens if he sees me, decides I'm too muscular or don't have the condition he thinks I have, and thus WASTES my money that I'm paying out of pocket to him by not reccomending me to a hormone specialist? The entire purpose of me seeing any of them would be to initiate hormone therapy, I didn't realize, in this free country, that I have to fully convince some quack with a degree who's likely a biased mofo to start with that I want to be a girl just so I can do what I want to do with my body.
What the heck, is this normal?
It's pretty messed up.
I might as well go to the doctor who prescribed me the hormones before and get on HRT again that way, THEN go to the dumb head doctors.
There is a therapy section. I believe you have some serious issues that can not be resolved by yourself. Transition is forever, I would hate to see you make a the biggest mistake of your life.
Quote from: kalt on October 10, 2007, 01:12:15 PM
The entire purpose of me seeing any of them would be to initiate hormone therapy, I didn't realize, in this free country, that I have to fully convince some quack with a degree who's likely a biased mofo to start with that I want to be a girl just so I can do what I want to do with my body.
Geez Kalt, going into therapy with an attitude like that isn't going to help you. You're not trying to "convince" anyone of anything. You're there to be diagnosed. If you're TS, then he'll diagnose you as such and recommend HRT when appropriate. That's how the SOC process works. Most of us have been through it, and to dismiss all therapists as "quacks" kinda demeans our own therapy experiences and diagnosis's, ya know?
Muscles don't disqualify anyone from being TS, even according to the SOC. Passability, muscles... none of that matters for a diagnosis. All that matters is WHO YOU ARE. If he follows the SOC, and if you're TS, you'll get what you need - and in a safe, controlled way.
And TRUST me, you may be surprised to see how many unresolved issues therapy can bring up along the way. Transitioning has this way of dredging up *everything* we labelled "deal with later" from childhood and beyond, and FORCES us to finally come to terms with it all.
~Kate~
Quote from: Kate on October 10, 2007, 01:53:25 PM
Geez Kalt, going into therapy with an attitude like that isn't going to help you.
-sigh- You're right. I was just pissy and went to the kewlest place on the web to rant.
QuoteIf you're TS
I am.
Quoterecommend HRT when appropriate.
That's the problem I have with it. I don't feel I should have to wait that long.
Hey Kalt,
I started therapy back in August of 06, and I have to say, that I think we get discriminated against in a sense because we are young. My therapist was soooooo hesitant towards me and often thought I was too young to figure this out by now and there had to be other underlying problems. It took a year of therapy for her to finally allow me to do HRT, so just remember, tell the therapist what YOU expect out of this, and how you want to be treated.
Quote from: shanetastic on October 10, 2007, 04:26:57 PM
Hey Kalt,
I started therapy back in August of 06, and I have to say, that I think we get discriminated against in a sense because we are young. My therapist was soooooo hesitant towards me and often thought I was too young to figure this out by now and there had to be other underlying problems. It took a year of therapy for her to finally allow me to do HRT, so just remember, tell the therapist what YOU expect out of this, and how you want to be treated.
Haha, don't worry, I'm very assertive:-)
Quote from: kalt on October 10, 2007, 04:33:27 PM
Quote from: shanetastic on October 10, 2007, 04:26:57 PM
Hey Kalt,
I started therapy back in August of 06, and I have to say, that I think we get discriminated against in a sense because we are young. My therapist was soooooo hesitant towards me and often thought I was too young to figure this out by now and there had to be other underlying problems. It took a year of therapy for her to finally allow me to do HRT, so just remember, tell the therapist what YOU expect out of this, and how you want to be treated.
Haha, don't worry, I'm very assertive:-)
I wasn't :P I'm pretty passive when it comes to telling people what I want and expect, so that's why it probably took me longer. Hopefully you'll find a good therapist who is decently priced :P
Imagine being out of the states, where people have to wait for years even to get in the door.
Waiting does suck, but we've got it lucky.
I started therapy in December of 2005. I got my hormones in September 2006. Why? Well, I only could afford only one or two visits to the therapist per month and he wanted to be certain of his diagnosis. And was I impatient? So much so that I despaired of getting anywhere and began thinking of suicide again. But I got there. Safely.
A gender therapist will not be biased against trans people, so you can forget about that idea. And the thought that youth is a reason for delaying hormones is not really true because I was 50 when I started therapy and I still had to wait ten months.
Going to a therapist with an adversarial attitude will not help things along and could possible even slow things down. I believe a therapy session should be approached as a shared task, a partnership, with your therapist. I like the idea of having a careful therapist because it shows that they care about their patients.
I hope it goes quickly as posible for you, Kalt, but since you've waited this long, are three months or so - or even longer - truly going to make a real difference in your transition? I suspect not. I read some very good advice from a very smart woman, Robyn (she's a member here), which really struck home. Following that advice was very tough and it saved me, in the long run, a great deal of grief. That advice was,
"Rush Slowly"
hugs & smiles
Emelye
Quote from: Emelye on October 11, 2007, 08:51:49 PM
I started therapy in December of 2005. I got my hormones in September 2006. Why? Well, I only could afford only one or two visits to the therapist per month and he wanted to be certain of his diagnosis. And was I impatient? So much so that I despaired of getting anywhere and began thinking of suicide again. But I got there. Safely.
A gender therapist will not be biased against trans people, so you can forget about that idea. And the thought that youth is a reason for delaying hormones is not really true because I was 50 when I started therapy and I still had to wait ten months.
Going to a therapist with an adversarial attitude will not help things along and could possible even slow things down. I believe a therapy session should be approached as a shared task, a partnership, with your therapist. I like the idea of having a careful therapist because it shows that they care about their patients.
I hope it goes quickly as posible for you, Kalt, but since you've waited this long, are three months or so - or even longer - truly going to make a real difference in your transition? I suspect not. I read some very good advice from a very smart woman, Robyn (she's a member here), which really struck home. Following that advice was very tough and it saved me, in the long run, a great deal of grief. That advice was,
"Rush Slowly"
hugs & smiles
Emelye
That's some amazing advice.
I'm kind of in a hurry because, I was hoping that I could transfer to a university and transition at the same time.
If I have to wait 3 months or longer, then it could end up being over a year before I can transition. On the bright side, I'll have longer hair and all. The down side is, I've already quit working out for the most part but my job as a PERSONAL TRAINER requires me to be in tip top shape. The longer I have to wait on this, the less time I'll have my job I suppose. I mean, I just want things to get going. I hate my life being at a stand-still like this.
On the bright side, life is life, the stars are bright and the air smells amazing in autumn. I suppose I should appreciate it a bit more before I go into permanent PMS mode.
Quote from: kalt on October 11, 2007, 08:55:40 PM
Quote from: Emelye on October 11, 2007, 08:51:49 PM
I started therapy in December of 2005. I got my hormones in September 2006. Why? Well, I only could afford only one or two visits to the therapist per month and he wanted to be certain of his diagnosis. And was I impatient? So much so that I despaired of getting anywhere and began thinking of suicide again. But I got there. Safely.
A gender therapist will not be biased against trans people, so you can forget about that idea. And the thought that youth is a reason for delaying hormones is not really true because I was 50 when I started therapy and I still had to wait ten months.
Going to a therapist with an adversarial attitude will not help things along and could possible even slow things down. I believe a therapy session should be approached as a shared task, a partnership, with your therapist. I like the idea of having a careful therapist because it shows that they care about their patients.
I hope it goes quickly as posible for you, Kalt, but since you've waited this long, are three months or so - or even longer - truly going to make a real difference in your transition? I suspect not. I read some very good advice from a very smart woman, Robyn (she's a member here), which really struck home. Following that advice was very tough and it saved me, in the long run, a great deal of grief. That advice was,
"Rush Slowly"
hugs & smiles
Emelye
That's some amazing advice.
I'm kind of in a hurry because, I was hoping that I could transfer to a university and transition at the same time.
If I have to wait 3 months or longer, then it could end up being over a year before I can transition. On the bright side, I'll have longer hair and all. The down side is, I've already quit working out for the most part but my job as a PERSONAL TRAINER requires me to be in tip top shape. The longer I have to wait on this, the less time I'll have my job I suppose. I mean, I just want things to get going. I hate my life being at a stand-still like this.
On the bright side, life is life, the stars are bright and the air smells amazing in autumn. I suppose I should appreciate it a bit more before I go into permanent PMS mode.
I understand where your coming from Kalt. I'm trying to finish most of the physical features of transition before I go off to college as well. But, the bad news here it goes I'll let you know. I'm very bitter towards the medical field when it comes to allowing "young people" to make their life long decisions. I believe I was pretty much held in therapy for like 4 monthers longer than expected. I did like a year of therapy argh heh. Anyways kalt, have faith, you can do this! :D
Quote from: kalt on October 10, 2007, 01:12:15 PM
And what happens if he sees me, decides I'm too muscular or don't have the condition he thinks I have...
LOL, the doc won't use muscularity as a criteria for hormones. I hope not.
I'd give the therapist a little room and be careful not to prejudge. I think most want what is best for their client. One suggestion I have is to read the latest copy of the SOC http://wpath.org/Documents2/socv6.pdf (http://wpath.org/Documents2/socv6.pdf) That will let him know that you are informed and willing to meet him on his playing field. If he strictly follows the SOC, look for a minimum of 3 months of therapy.
Quote from: Suzie on October 13, 2007, 11:14:02 AM
If he strictly follows the SOC, look for a minimum of 3 months of therapy.
That's gay.
Rawr.
I want more icecream>.>
Quote from: kalt on October 13, 2007, 11:17:05 AM
Quote from: Suzie on October 13, 2007, 11:14:02 AM
If he strictly follows the SOC, look for a minimum of 3 months of therapy.
That's gay.
Can you really blame them? They're putting their professional reputations and reliability on the line when they sign that HRT letter for someone. It's frustrating, I know, to have to wait when YOU know you're ready to go. But a therapist has to be sure too - and it takes time to evaluate someone. People often do act impulsively, and end up in a bad, bad place before they've had a chance to fully realize the consequences of their choices. That "breathing space" gives everyone a chance to step back and examine things with caution and care before making a HUGLEY life-altering decision.
~Kate~
Quote from: kalt on October 13, 2007, 11:17:05 AM
Quote from: Suzie on October 13, 2007, 11:14:02 AM
If he strictly follows the SOC, look for a minimum of 3 months of therapy.
That's gay.
Rawr.
I want more icecream>.>
Just don't get stuck in therapy for a year before they sign the letter like me Kalt, then I think you'll be happy enough :D
Quote from: Kate on October 13, 2007, 01:19:47 PM
Can you really blame them?
Absolutely not.
QuoteThey're putting their professional reputations and reliability on the line when they sign that HRT letter for someone.
And we are too.
Posted on: October 13, 2007, 02:51:44 PM
Quote from: shanetastic on October 13, 2007, 01:22:09 PM
Quote from: kalt on October 13, 2007, 11:17:05 AM
Quote from: Suzie on October 13, 2007, 11:14:02 AM
If he strictly follows the SOC, look for a minimum of 3 months of therapy.
That's gay.
Rawr.
I want more icecream>.>
Just don't get stuck in therapy for a year before they sign the letter like me Kalt, then I think you'll be happy enough :D
If I can convince my therapist that I'm already living full time... hrmm.
Wouldn't be too hard either:p
Quote from: kalt on October 13, 2007, 11:17:05 AM
Quote from: Suzie on October 13, 2007, 11:14:02 AM
If he strictly follows the SOC, look for a minimum of 3 months of therapy.
That's gay.
Rawr.
I want more icecream>.>
You can start antiandrogens right away. It's the estrogen that has to wait.
Quote from: Lisbeth on October 13, 2007, 02:04:07 PM
You can start antiandrogens right away. It's the estrogen that has to wait.
O'rly?
That'd be awesome!
You have any citation for that or is justp ersonal experience?
Quote from: kalt on October 13, 2007, 02:08:58 PM
Quote from: Lisbeth on October 13, 2007, 02:04:07 PM
You can start antiandrogens right away. It's the estrogen that has to wait.
O'rly?
That'd be awesome!
You have any citation for that or is justp ersonal experience?
You can find it in the Standards of Care, but by personal experience you can get your GP to prescribe them right away. He may balk at high dosages, but your endocrynologist will not have a problem.
Quote from: Lisbeth on October 14, 2007, 09:59:20 AM
You can find it in the Standards of Care, but by personal experience you can get your GP to prescribe them right away. He may balk at high dosages, but your endocrynologist will not have a problem.
Thanks for the response, I've been on my toes waiting and it's been on my mind a ton.
What are high doses exactly?
Actually, considering the sensetivity of this content, I think I'll just PM you. I don't want little kids getting on and self-prescribing>.>
Posted on: October 14, 2007, 12:19:30 PM
Quote from: kalt on October 14, 2007, 10:14:47 AM
Quote from: Lisbeth on October 14, 2007, 09:59:20 AM
You can find it in the Standards of Care, but by personal experience you can get your GP to prescribe them right away. He may balk at high dosages, but your endocrynologist will not have a problem.
Thanks for the response, I've been on my toes waiting and it's been on my mind a ton.
What are high doses exactly?
Actually, considering the sensetivity of this content, I think I'll just PM you. I don't want little kids getting on and self-prescribing>.>
Haha excellent idea Kalt. You were probably about to get a lesson regarding the rules. :P
Quote from: shanetastic on October 10, 2007, 04:26:57 PM
...so just remember, tell the therapist what YOU expect out of this, and how you want to be treated.
If I was a therapist and someone came to me with this attitude, I'd tell them to find another therapist.
Quote from: Annie Social on October 28, 2007, 07:13:45 PM
Quote from: shanetastic on October 10, 2007, 04:26:57 PM
...so just remember, tell the therapist what YOU expect out of this, and how you want to be treated.
If I was a therapist and someone came to me with this attitude, I'd tell them to find another therapist.
It's not really an attitude. . . if it came across like that, I'm not that assertive. What's wrong with saying. . . "Hey I was hoping with therapy to begin X eventually, can you help me with this?"
That's not really an attitude at all there, so maybe you were thinking something more aggressively?