Today, October 11, is National Coming Out Day. And what do you know--as it turned out, today was actually the day I came out to everyone at work. I had the most wonderful day at work in my whole life! This is the happiest I have ever been.
First I went to my favorite salon and got my hair styled. The stylist was not only excellent at her work, she engaged me in girl-talk the whole time. I got highlights and a soft, feminine cut that flatters my face. I was awed when I saw the results! I've never looked this good before. I had to pay more than I could afford, but it was worth it because I now pass better than ever. I wore a new black Tahari skirt suit, a very feminine ivory blouse, two-inch heels.
While I was at the salon, the boss called an all-hands meeting. He sent me this report:
Subject: Update
Hypatia,
Good afternoon. I held an all hands meeting this morning. I let the program know about your transition, name change, and the use of the ladies' restroom. It went well, Hypatia.
Please let me know if you need anything. I will catch up with you soon.
Take care.
Right after the meeting, one of my female co-workers sent me this e-mail:
Subject: Welcome!
I have come to admire your exquisite work, now I also admire your courage. You take my breath away.
I finally went to the ladies' room which I had used to bypass, on the way into the men's room I used to sigh and dream of the day I could make the switch. I found that the ladies' room was much nicer inside with all kinds of nicely scented hand soaps and moisturizing lotions provided.
Many people, men and women, came by my desk to congratulate me and express their support. I received a lot of compliments on my looks. One of my co-workers is from Kurdistan and remarked that my new real name is the word for "beautiful" in the Kurdish language. Everyone in management came around to ask if it was going well and if there was anything they could do. They were so concerned that others might disrespect me--but on the contrary, everyone was good to me.
I also went to the post office and applied for my new passport, my first official ID as female, I had the doctor's letter and my name change court order, the woman who photographed me and took my application said I have beautiful eyes and she was very supportive too.
Today I was thinking this is a level of happiness I've known only in dreams, I had to pinch myself to be sure I was in real life. I have been saying many prayers of thanks. :) What a tremendous relief this is!
Thats sounds like a great day Hypatia. Congrates on the progress.
Alice
My best friend at work told me that after the meeting, she overheard someone say, "He's going to use the women's room as a male?" So my friend told them, "She's a <i>woman!</i>" That's what friends are for.
Quote from: Hypatia on October 11, 2007, 09:30:00 PM
My best friend at work told me that after the meeting, she overheard someone say, "He's going to use the women's room as a male?" So my friend told them, "She's a <i>woman!</i>" That's what friends are for.
They'll understand eventually. It's always hardest for people that you've known to adjust to a new situation.
Congratulations Hypatia, I am glad it went so well for you.
At times we do underestimate the compassion and acceptance of change that the majority of human beings afford us.
I was overwhelmed on my first day at work by the number of supportive people that approached me, people I barely spoke to previously and hardly knew.
I went into work fearing the worst, expecting resentment and rejection but like you, came away feeling respected and accepted.
Build on your success
Rebecca
Wow, Hypatia! That's just phenomenal! So happy for you, hon.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fganjataz.com%2F01smileys%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2FloopyBlonde-blinking.gif&hash=4545ddf8251cf9c32ae6074d56e48bc34a755857)Kristi
I'm so happy for you! That is just incredible, and I am glad things went so smoothly. May everything go as well for you in the future :-*
Congratulations Hypatia! i'm totally so jealous of happy for you!
-ell
Thanks, everyone. I got one more boost yesterday to top everything off. When I called the Postal Service information line to ask about passport applications, I didn't even give my name, but the woman on the other end right away called me "Ma'am." This was a first. So maybe that vocal feminization training really is starting to work.
Congratulations I'm so glad to hear things are going well for you, it's great to have a supportive work environment. :)
Congrats! I am glad to read that it is going so well.
A wonderful post, Hypatia! Thank you and congratulations!!
I've just completed my first month full time and while I didn't get the kind of support at work that others have gotten I haven't had any outright hostility either (it's been a bit of passive/aggressive, lol).
In any event, I know how finally being your true self in ALL of your life's circumstances feels. I can honestly sat that, all the other BS notwithstanding, life is infinitely better now.
Again, congratulations!!
Emelye
Having understanding and supportive co-workers is so wonderful. My first week as Desire started out very stressful, but my friends at work really helped. For the most part they welcomed me as always. I always related well to the women in the building and they surprised me by accepting me as a new girlfriend. I was invited to lunch with them and even to a social outing on a weekend.
Hell yes! Things went that well for me at work, also, but I work at a dinky restaraunt so it was never really a big deal in the first place. I'll never forget my manager's words to me when I told her about my transition. She was bubbly and happy for me and supportive and nice - then her face darkened, and her voice lowered, and her expression became terrifying and dire. She looked me in the eyes and said, "... and if anyone screws with you, tell me."
My nickname for her has always been "Two-Face Tammy". She's fun.
So far, though, she has not had to disembowel anyone. The whole store is quite understanding. Now that my generation is getting older, how interesting is it that people are more accepting in general of these sorts of things. Oh my.
Good for you, though. Seriously, take this to heart - the world is getting better in a lot of really important ways. Just keep at it, you know?
~ BB