I feel like I never ever had a sense of self or sort of like, no form of control over the person I was. I feel like I was always insecure, dependent on other people and did or said things that were so out of character. I never felt like a real person. I was truly mostly dependent on love though because it was the only thing that ever made me feel close to being whole (though I never was). Do you guys have any experiences with this?
Quote from: Anxo on March 17, 2016, 08:05:41 PM
Do you guys have any experiences with this?
Yes. I had issues with this when I was younger. When I started to do well in my career and be involved with things that helped me feel effective and capable those feelings receded.
Some things that helped:
* I made a list of all the things I liked about myself - things that I would have respected if I saw those qualities in a friend.
* I got to understand myself. What did I really like doing (as opposed to just thought I ought to do)? I tried to do these things as often as I could.
* I actively looked for ways I could help out and give back to the community.
I hope this helps.
Anxo,
Welcome to Susan's. My, you jumped right in. I hope you are finding some great information and a community that can help support you.
I felt very like your descriptions for much of my life. I have also had some differences but everybody's journey is different.
I am posting some links to some important information to new members. Please take a moment to read through them:
Things that you should read
Site Terms of Service & Rules to Live By (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html) | Standard Terms & Definitions (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,54369.0.html) | Post Ranks (including when you can upload an avatar) (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,114.0.html.) |
Reputation rules (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,18960.0.html) | News posting & quoting guidelines (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,174951.0.html) | Photo, avatars, & signature images policy (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,59974.msg383866.html#msg383866) |
Hope you are able to find what you are looking for and the community here can help.
With warmth,
Joanna
I've always knew who I was,i've always done my own thing,I guess this is why I don't have friends because I really never had time or trust issues got in the way, for I don't trust anyone,except my wife.