Do you guys think its possible to be agender but be more masculine?
I feel like i want to brake down because i don't know what to do anymore i've gone by ftm for a while..
i hate being considered a female because i'm not i don't mind being considered a male but i'm not 100% that and iv'e always told people i have a small non binary part so it doesn't bother me that much i would think...
but no its bothering me and i can't figure out why i don't need to figure out why but i dislike the feelings i'm having. I'm looking for someone who is agender because iv'e never spoken to someone like this and i think its about time i reach out to the small non binary part of me ask ask for someone to speak to about this feeling.
I don't know if I can be helpful here, but I want to try. I'm genderfluid. So I don't identify as either gender in a concrete way. Because it goes back and forth, I like being addressed as male and as female. But, probably because I have male anatomy, I sometimes get uncomfortable being addressed as male. I think that it can feel like a dismissal of my identity because it feels like people regard me as though I'm a cis-male.
I am not agender but my personal view of the non binary/binary world is something like this.
CIS
Non binary with CIS Identity
Non binary neither/both Identity
Non binary with transsexual Identity
Transsexual
Because the scale is nothing but shades of gray, you could be anywhere between neither and transsexual. Consider the fact that even CIS may not have clear cut dividing lines. A husband may stay home and enjoy the feminine task of staying at home caring for the kids while the wife wants to slug it out in the business world. You can have a very mild male identity and be comfortable with minimal changes to your body or life to push you a little off the center of the scale in the male direction.
There isn't going to be an exact label to describe you but you need to find where you are comfortable and go with it.
Quote from: Midnightstar on March 21, 2016, 11:36:10 PM
Do you guys think its possible to be agender but be more masculine?
I feel like i want to brake down because i don't know what to do anymore i've gone by ftm for a while..
i hate being considered a female because i'm not i don't mind being considered a male but i'm not 100% that and iv'e always told people i have a small non binary part so it doesn't bother me that much i would think...
but no its bothering me and i can't figure out why i don't need to figure out why but i dislike the feelings i'm having. I'm looking for someone who is agender because iv'e never spoken to someone like this and i think its about time i reach out to the small non binary part of me ask ask for someone to speak to about this feeling.
You are permitted to identify yourself whichever way seems most true. If you feel agender on the male side, than it's OK to be that way.
It's possible to wear yourself out trying to classify yourself or describe your experience. My gender therapist reminds me that it's more helpful to figure out how you want to live.
Of course it's possible :). I've recently realised I feel roughly 90% male and the rest agender. But for me I find it easiest for people to only know me as being male and not nb. My nb side is so small that I can live with people only seeing me as 100% male and referring to me as such.
Right now I try not to let this realisation about my gender get to me. What's important is that I'm much happier presenting male and am happy with the changes T is giving me. It shouldn't matter that some days I like presenting feminine and some days I like presenting masculine. I'm pretty sure most people don't have a completely binary gender identity and just don't realise it.
That helped a lot thanks guys i felt really strange there writing this.
I recently discovered the concept of "demigender". This is another umbrella term where things like Demiboy, demigirl, demiandrogyne and so on fit, but in and of itself demigender can also be an identity.
Simply put, demigender means that you Identify with one or more genders but not in a complete sense.
I love this concept and it makes a lot of sense to me because I've realized that this is sort of how I've been feeling, and why I was struggling for a number of months to better understand and accept myself. I was having a lot of trouble with the unknown because I was saying "well I identify with this, but I also don't" that's were demigender came into play for me. Because where I'm AMAB I identify as male, but also not really. I also I identify with being female, but also not really, just like I also identify as androgyne, but not really. At the base of this, I can identify with many different forms of gender, but it comes down to not understanding the construct and expectations of gender in our society. I can partly identify with several spaces on the spectrum but not fully with any of them. In my mind this gives me the freedom to just be myself in recognizing that I partially identify with a range of genders, and that that's okay. I hope this makes sense! It does for me!
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