Hi everyone,
I had voice surgery with Dr. Haben on March 23rd. I have found it helpful to read through other people's experiences, so I thought I'd share my own. I only had the Glottoplasty (what Dr. Haben calls "The Single").
I have created a page which I will keep updated with samples of my voice as I heal. You can find it here. (http://happyhansha.org/voice-surgery/)
So far, my experience has been positive. I met with Dr. Haben the day before surgery. He scoped my throat and took samples of my voice. He estimated my average pitch without using voice training to be between 140hz and 145hz. He told me that he wanted my post-op pitch to be between 195hz and 200hz. I told him that I had been hoping for at least 205hz. He told me that he was worried about trying to go that high because he needed room for a margin of error of about 10-15hz, and my voice could end up not matching my body. We agreed that he would do what was best in his professional experience, and that I would accept that.
After surgery, Dr. Haben told me that he had sutured up 45% of my vocal chords. It sounded like he had done a little bit more than originally planned based on my request that my pitch come out a little higher in the end. I trust that whatever he did was the right choice.
Prior to surgery, I bought an older model iPad Mini, and set it up with some software that allows me to type in large letters, as well as having what I wrote read aloud if I want it to be. The text-to-speech component is turning out to be almost useless, because my tablet's speakers are so weak. It doesn't matter much though, because in most situations it works out fine to just show people what I wrote.
I have already been struggling with the voice rest. I have coughed on a number of occasions when the build up in my throat was too much to stop myself. On one occasion my mom said something funny, and although I tried really, really hard not to laugh, I felt my vocal chords tighten a little bit. A few times, I accidentally whispered a single word before I realized that I had. I'm also pretty sure that I've felt my vocal chords moving when I'm writing something online. I'm doing my best not to make any noise, but it's honestly a lot harder than I thought it was to not move my vocal cords at all.
Post-op, I've become a tea addict. It turns out that chamomile tea with honey is amazing when you've had voice surgery. I'm basically just guzzling it non-stop. It soothes the pain, and also clears out stuff that can cause coughing. I'm also keeping water on me at all times so that I can drink it when I feel the urge to cough. It doesn't always stop me, but it does help.
The surgery is more painful than I expected. My friends have taken to saying that I traded my voice to a sea witch for a throat dragon. The first few days after surgery I could barely get food down because everything hurt so much. It took me an hour and a half just to eat some salmon the night after surgery because I could only get down a very tiny amount every few minutes. I was finally able to get some down after having both hot tea and ice cream. The pain's a lot better a few days after surgery, and now it basically just feels like I have a bad cold.
Compared to FFS, this isn't too bad. I woke up feeling about 50 times better after this surgery than I did after FFS. Even in the recovery room I was making jokes using my tablet and posting things to Facebook. It does feel like hell, but physically it's not as painful by far as FFS. Emotionally, this surgery is terrifying. Every time I can't prevent myself from coughing, I sit there for about ten minutes with my hands clasped over my mouth and a terrified expression on my face. I feel constantly like I'm going to ruin my voice, but I don't think I can do more than I already am to protect it.
Getting through airport security on the way home was interesting. Getting through security while trans is scary enough, but not being able to say anything to the TSA adds a new dimension to it. Luckily, the Rochester TSA was awesome to me. Their particle scanners went off on me (because of course they did), but they had a woman frisk me, and used the right pronouns the whole time.
I'm home now, and it's basically just a waiting game. I'm brewing tea constantly, and just trying to rest. I don't expect to have the slightest clue how this actually went until at least mid June (three months post-op). I'm glad to be on the healing end of things, and am just getting used to being (hopefully temporarily) mute.
Prior to Surgery, I designed some business cards that I could hand people who try to talk to me. They're turning out to be pretty handy, and I'd be happy to make the templates available online if anyone else wants to use them.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fhappyhansha.org%2Fvoice-surgery%2Fvoice-surgery-cards.jpg&hash=d9d55278f497318b411bbd5bb8282f4e3f741487)
Quote from: ShadowCharms on March 26, 2016, 01:18:12 PM
Prior to Surgery, I designed some business cards that I could hand people who try to talk to me. They're turning out to be pretty handy, and I'd be happy to make the templates available online if anyone else wants to use them.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fhappyhansha.org%2Fvoice-surgery%2Fvoice-surgery-cards.jpg&hash=d9d55278f497318b411bbd5bb8282f4e3f741487)
This is the GREATEST idea!!! Thank you for the inspiration! Yes, please make them available!
Biz card idea is very cool!
I thought about printing a whole bunch of T-shirts, that basically say the same ;D
Today was the first day when I was allowed to try talking. The results were downright weird. Unless I shift my pitch way, way, way up, I can't get any sound out at all. I think I've heard results like that on here before, but I'm not sure if it means anything at one month.
Here are some samples (I'm honestly not kidding. I recorded both of these)
http://happyhansha.org/voice-surgery/parrot.wav
http://happyhansha.org/voice-surgery/miss-piggy.wav
If I talk any lower than those samples, nothing comes out at all. I'm not noticing any strain when I go that high. Back when I did voice training, there was strain when I went into falsetto. I'm not noticing it right now. My voice can just go there. I'm not even sure if it's a good idea for me to be talking while that's going on.
I recorded the parrot one because that's about the average quality of my voice right now. I wasn't intentionally trying to sound like a parrot (aside from the words I used), that's just how it comes out. One other thing of note is that I can only get out a few words at a time. I can't form more than one short sentence before my voice just stops working.
You didn't mention that you were given 4 weeks instead of the standard week and a half before talking. The samples were pretty short but the first one didn't sound to bad. I suspect you still have a fair amount of swelling and until that goes down the voice is going to be weird and hard to control. Voice fade was pretty common with me out to 6 months and even now I still seem to have some issues with mucus when I use the voice in normal conversation.
Oh, I said that in a confusing way. Dr. Haben told me that I was allowed to talk any time after 1 week, but that he strongly encouraged me to limit or refrain from talking for the first month. I chose to wait the whole month before talking. I will admit that I coughed and sneezed sometimes during the month, but I didn't talk.
It's hard to tell with such short clips. :) However, your explanation is similar to my situation and it's been a similar amount of time from me (although I saw Dr. Kim). It's far too easy to go into what used to be falsetto...perhaps it is indeed best to take it easy for a bit longer?
Quote from: ShadowCharms on April 23, 2016, 07:00:24 PM
Today was the first day when I was allowed to try talking. The results were downright weird. Unless I shift my pitch way, way, way up, I can't get any sound out at all. I think I've heard results like that on here before, but I'm not sure if it means anything at one month.
Here are some samples (I'm honestly not kidding. I recorded both of these)
http://happyhansha.org/voice-surgery/parrot.wav
http://happyhansha.org/voice-surgery/miss-piggy.wav
If I talk any lower than those samples, nothing comes out at all. I'm not noticing any strain when I go that high. Back when I did voice training, there was strain when I went into falsetto. I'm not noticing it right now. My voice can just go there. I'm not even sure if it's a good idea for me to be talking while that's going on.
I recorded the parrot one because that's about the average quality of my voice right now. I wasn't intentionally trying to sound like a parrot (aside from the words I used), that's just how it comes out. One other thing of note is that I can only get out a few words at a time. I can't form more than one short sentence before my voice just stops working.
You have a really quirky sense of humor which is in line with my sense of humor. I probably would've done just what you did by naming my voices. I do hear a difference between your pre-op trained voice and your parrot voice. If what you said was true in that the parrot voice just comes out like that without any sort of conscious influence like the pre-op trained voice, then you've already shown good improvement. Hopefully this is the start of even better things to come.
Quote from: GeekGirl on April 24, 2016, 08:04:46 PM
You have a really quirky sense of humor which is in line with my sense of humor. I probably would've done just what you did by naming my voices.
I do very much enjoy quirky humor. A few days ago, I was doing impressions of old ladies at the office because with my current pitch and hoarseness, I'm pretty good at it.
I'm at about 5 weeks post-op right now, and my voice quality has already improved somewhat. The hoarsness is still pretty bad. I find that it's not showing up as much in recordings, and I think that's because I'm not talking very loudly. If I'm just talking to myself, the quality is already kind of okay. If I'm talking to anyone else (including on the phone), all bets are off. I sound super hoarse still, and I feel like I'm shouting just to be heard in a quiet room.
Hearing the hoarseness improve is a little bit like watching fog dissipate on a misty morning. It's like as it lifts, more of my range becomes available. It feels like I'm trying to talk lower than I really can anymore, and I don't know if that's part of healing, or if it's just me not understanding how my voice will work from now on. The parts of my range that do work right now are super high. I'm seeing an average that I think is above 250hz. Dr. Haben told me that it was his intention to put my average at about 200hz, so I assume that my range will extend downward as I heal. That seems contrary to what I've heard both from other people and from Dr. Haben himself, that my pitch will increase as my swelling goes down. I wonder if maybe my range will expand downward as the hoarseness lifts, but my general pitch will go upward at the same time.
Here's a sample of how I sound right now when I'm not shouting to be heard in a quiet room. In this sample I'm doing some of my old functional phrases from voice training. I'm not trying to make my voice do anything, but I am deliberately speaking with the part of my pitch that works right now. It doesn't feel like I'm straining to reach this pitch. It's more like sliding something into a notch. It's intentional, but it feels like it belongs there.
http://happyhansha.org/voice-surgery/phrases-1.wav (http://happyhansha.org/voice-surgery/phrases-1.wav)
Sounds pretty good actually. :)
Glad to hear the recovery is going well! I had surgery with Dr. Haben a week before you, so i am at 6 weeks of healing now with great results. I had the triple done, and have probably been one of the worst with following post care to the T. I am curious what your thoughts on my voice progress are in comparison with yours, and if you feel like you still need to place the pitch even though it is so much easier to do so.
Here is a recent broadcast from my twitch chat, lots of random chat without any effort put into placement or pitch:
https://www.twitch.tv/lucevelyn/v/63642474
Happy Healing!
-Lucy
Hi everyone,
Sorry I abandoned this topic for a while. About a month and a half into my recovery, I got the news that I was kinda-sorta losing my job. I'm actually being transferred to another company, but in many ways it has been scary and has taken up almost all of my time.
I decided to take a few audio samples just so you can hear where I am right now. I'm at about 14 weeks into my recovery. I'm having the typical problems a lot of women on here have with voice surgery. While my pitch has improved dramatically and my quality has gotten a fair bit better, my voice is a lot softer than it used to be. It's hard to hear me in any remotely loud place, even if I feel l like I'm shouting.
I still deal with pain in my vocal cords sometimes. I shouted in frustration the other day, and my throat hurt a lot until the next morning. Even if I talk remotely loudly for a minute or two (like to be heard by a large crowd) my vocal cords are sore for hours afterward. They feel very fragile and delicate.
Nonetheless, I'm quite enjoying my new voice. I'm not afraid to speak in public anymore, and for the first time since i was about 16 years old, I actually kind of like the way I sound when I talk. My new voice makes me feel cute, and I find that as a result, I tend to act more cute and vulnerable when I'm feeling that way, instead of getting defensive. It has changed the way a lot of people relate to me.
This surgery may have happened just in time, as my new job is a work from home position, and my voice is all anyone will have to go by to determine how to gender me.
Here are some samples of my new voice:
Sample 1 (http://happyhansha.org/voice-surgery/week-14/sample-1.wav)
Sample 2 (http://happyhansha.org/voice-surgery/week-14/sample-2.wav)
Sample 3 (http://happyhansha.org/voice-surgery/week-14/sample-3.wav)
Lucy, your voice sounds cute and soft in that video! I hope your healing process is still going well.
You sound great! Thank you for the voice clips and hope everything is on track with your employment. :)
Keep us posted.. I have a higher pitch than most males.. I am considering Haben for the single...
Keri
Quote from: ShadowCharms on June 24, 2016, 09:38:52 PM
I decided to take a few audio samples just so you can hear where I am right now. I'm at about 14 weeks into my recovery. I'm having the typical problems a lot of women on here have with voice surgery. While my pitch has improved dramatically and my quality has gotten a fair bit better, my voice is a lot softer than it used to be. It's hard to hear me in any remotely loud place, even if I feel l like I'm shouting.
I still deal with pain in my vocal cords sometimes. I shouted in frustration the other day, and my throat hurt a lot until the next morning. Even if I talk remotely loudly for a minute or two (like to be heard by a large crowd) my vocal cords are sore for hours afterward. They feel very fragile and delicate.
Nonetheless, I'm quite enjoying my new voice. I'm not afraid to speak in public anymore, and for the first time since i was about 16 years old, I actually kind of like the way I sound when I talk. My new voice makes me feel cute, and I find that as a result, I tend to act more cute and vulnerable when I'm feeling that way, instead of getting defensive. It has changed the way a lot of people relate to me.
You sound great! Much improved over the original voice. In your samples, you said you think you sound male, but I think you sound like a girl next door type.
It seems like a lot of people are complaining about volume, but my personal thoughts on this (unsubstantiated by any evidence, of course) is we probably didn't have especially loud voices when we were children and it wasn't until we hit our adult years that our voices matured and we learned how to project them. I would guess that it's like starting with a kid voice all over again and we have to develop our ability to project our voices over time... which might take years. I teach Bikram yoga and thankfully I can use a headset to make my voice louder. Many of my peers use a headset and they're genetic women, so now I have to just get used to using a headset. My surgery is coming up soon. I'm quite excited. Thanks for your update!
This will clearly vary depending on a number of factors. I suspect I still have some granulation. I am about 2 weeks away from a year after surgery but I noticed at 7 months I started to gain volume. A test a few days ago showed somewhere along the line I gained 100HZ on the upper end making it possible for me to reach 600HZ comfortably. I suspect at least for me, healing many take between one and two years. The voice has been very usable for a while but I keep gaining pitch and volume. If I knew a good doctor to run a camera down my nose, I think it would be worth the price of admission to see what things look like but I'm not in a rush to do it.
Dena
Who did u use
Keri
Quote from: Dena on June 28, 2016, 08:47:25 PM
This will clearly vary depending on a number of factors. I suspect I still have some granulation. I am about 2 weeks away from a year after surgery but I noticed at 7 months I started to gain volume. A test a few days ago showed somewhere along the line I gained 100HZ on the upper end making it possible for me to reach 600HZ comfortably. I suspect at least for me, healing many take between one and two years. The voice has been very usable for a while but I keep gaining pitch and volume. If I knew a good doctor to run a camera down my nose, I think it would be worth the price of admission to see what things look like but I'm not in a rush to do it.
I was Dr Haben and I had my surgery July 15th. My voice sample even earned a spot on the web site as the 64 year old post op.
Hi everyone,
I thought I would post another voice sample. This is me at 5 months and 2 weeks of healing. (http://happyhansha.org/voice-surgery/week-24/rainbow-passage.wav)
Quote from: ShadowCharms on September 05, 2016, 11:17:22 AM
Hi everyone,
I thought I would post another voice sample. This is me at 5 months and 2 weeks of healing. (http://happyhansha.org/voice-surgery/week-24/rainbow-passage.wav)
Sounds great! Congrats on a fantastic result.
It seems your surgery worked, but in my honest opinion, you should use the potential of your new voice and work on prosody and resonance now. The surgery is a great help, but to use its potential , some additional training is helpful.
Yeah, I agree. I think my pitch is good, but I could do better on other vocal traits. I've started meeting with the same speech therapists I was meeting with before my surgery. We're going to focus on intonation and resonance.
Before my surgery I consulted a number of local speech therapists about this surgery. They all told me that even if it worked, I would probably still need voice coaching. I'm not really surprised to see I need that now given that feedback, but I'm still really happy i got the surgery.