Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Topic started by: killerjen231 on March 30, 2016, 04:30:13 PM

Title: Not Sure About How I Feel
Post by: killerjen231 on March 30, 2016, 04:30:13 PM
I get really confused about how I'm feeling. I'm kinda comfortable in my skin as a biological female. But I get wicked jealous of males.

I hate wearing skirts or dresses. Like despise. It makes me so uncomfortable that I usually end up shaking practically uncontrollably. I don't understand the appeal of most feminine clothes. And I hate that female pants have super tiny pockets that basically scream at you that you have no choice but to carry a purse. If I could dress like a man everyday, I would.

As a female, I completely identify as a lesbian. I have no desire to have sex of any way, shape or form with males.

This is where I get confused. I don't really mind that I'm a female. I don't mind having long hair, and most aspects I can live with. But, at the same time I very much desire to be a male. One of the problems is that I'm very short, 5ft. So that makes me very skeptical that I'd be able to pull it off. It makes me think that I would just look really weird and I just want to be normal. It's just something I've always wondered what it would be like. Would my life be easier? Would I actually be more happy in a general sense? I'm just so confused all the time.

I also feel like guys just have it easier in a sense. No periods, no makeup being socially forced on them, no dress code being enforced as strictly on them.

I see guys and girls and wonder why I have to be the way I am. I wonder if they're satisfied living the life they are. If they wake up thinking about being happy with themselves. Or if they just wake up being happy and fulfilled in that aspect of their life.

Thanks for reading.

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Title: Re: Not Sure About How I Feel
Post by: Laura_7 on March 30, 2016, 05:43:18 PM

You could try some black plain cloth trousers for men. They have large pockets and they can look good and make you feel comfortable.


Here are a few questions that could help:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=j-hKibc6qGI


Well you could look for an experienced gender therapist to help sort this out.
There are even online therapists:
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,187135.0.html


*hugs*
Title: Re: Not Sure About How I Feel
Post by: killerjen231 on March 30, 2016, 05:56:27 PM
Quote from: Laura_7 on March 30, 2016, 05:43:18 PM
You could try some black plain cloth trousers for men. They have large pockets and they can look good and make you feel comfortable.


Here are a few questions that could help:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=j-hKibc6qGI


Well you could look for an experienced gender therapist to help sort this out.
There are even online therapists:
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,187135.0.html


*hugs*
Thank you, I appreciate you taking the time to respond. [emoji3]

Sent from my SM-G920T using Tapatalk

Title: Re: Not Sure About How I Feel
Post by: Peep on March 30, 2016, 06:29:23 PM
You can dress in clothes from the men's section regardless of your gender identity. And men's s/xs sizes are almost always the only things left in sale rails. If you only want the big pockets, a lot of mens jeans, particularly skinny jeans are pretty much the same as ladies' ones. They don't even always have that much extra crotch room.

Clothes are also relatively (compared to surgery and HRT etc) easy and cheap, and totally reversible... you could try dressing differently, see if people gender you differently, and see how it makes you feel.
Title: Re: Not Sure About How I Feel
Post by: Dena on March 30, 2016, 07:07:36 PM
Welcome to Susan's Place. It appears that you might be in the non binary classification where you feel somewhat comfortable and uncomfortable in both the male and female world. This is subject to change if you enter therapy and explore your feelings. Two points in your post don't apply. Your sexual preference is not related to your gender identity. You may be attracted to women as a man or a woman. The other item is your hight. While you might be in the shorter end for a male, there are men who are your hight. Testosterone should you decide it's right for you would masculinize you sufficiently that you would be gendered male. I have two links for you to explore. The first is  our Wiki  (https://www.susans.org/wiki/Transgender) where you will learn some of the transgender variations. The second is  "the transition channel"  (https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfO3B57E6NpIn-KsVjvmLLw) which contains the link that Laura provided you with. Feel free to explore the site but you might want to look at the FTM and non binary section of the site. I am here to answer question so feel free to ask me any you might have by posting on this thread.

We issue to all new members the following links so you will best be able to use the web site.

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