Can you not self diagnose gender dysphoria?
When I found out what transgender was, I could relate to how other transguys were feeling about their body, something I found impossible with women. I really tried not to be transgender for several years because I thought no one would like me... So I denied it and everyone liked me being a girl but I didn't... I got envious of male bodies as mine developed female. But no one will understand any of that... They think I'm "self diagnosing myself" with the "mental illness" transgender. Do I need someone to tell me what I'm feeling? Is that being "stuck up?" IDK. ???
Wish I wasn't trans. :-\
From what I understand, the only person that can tell you that you are transgender is you. No professional can tell you whether you are or not, they can only guide you in finding the answer for yourself. I have tried, and am still trying to get a professional to tell me that I am or am not trans. I want them to diagnose me because I cannot trust myself to be absolutely certain one way or the other, but that isn't how it works.
I wish not to be trans too. I would be perfectly happy being a cis male or a cis female, but being trans is too much for me to process. The dysphoria is very unpleasant.
I hope you can find the answers you are looking for. There also appears to be different requirements and hoops to jump through to get the treatment you may need depending which country you are from. A good gender therapist would be a good place to start.
I've wished I wasn't trans many a time. It sucks. But it mostly sucks because our society refuses to acknowledge that we exist. Somehow, less "advanced" peoples worldwide figured out that trans people exist (although sometimes they don't draw a line between trans and gay, which are different things with similar etiology!). But the West since the dawn of the modern era (let's say circa 1500) has steadfastly refused to acknowledge we exist. (Even when they were reviving ancient Western texts that refer to other genders.)
The West "rediscovered" us in the latter half of the 19th century, when, we, with bodies not tailor made for the needs of the industrial world, were labeled, pathologized, called pathetic and crazy.
Trans is not a psychiatric condition. It's neurological. It's other people that give us psychiatric conditions like depression and anxiety, dealing with them.
I've been on T for 7 weeks. I find myself remarkably less foggy and fuzzy. I thought it was due to depression. Or allergies. I thought I would be that way for the rest of my life. Dena on this forum likes to say our brains run better on the correct hormones. I didn't believe that. Well, experiencing it is believing.
As for your question, you can go to the doctor and say, "Hey, I hurt my arm" but they're still going to do some diagnostic questions and tests (like moving and touching your arm and shoulder) before they come up with a diagnosis and write a prescription. Doctors like endos and surgeons generally, not always, would like another medical professional to sign off on your diagnosis before they go forward. That's not a ridiculous ask, but the problem comes in because some therapists are gatekeeping, powertripping <not allowed>. So the whole trick becomes finding the "cool" therapist who will write you a letter with minimal expense, wait, and ,<not allowed> (like telling you demeaning things).
The alternative would be for the doctor to attempt to diagnose you. I think most aren't comfortable with that because they aren't as familiar with the dizzying and bizarre bestiary of conditions you can come across psychiatrically.
Quote from: jayne01 on April 21, 2016, 10:48:33 AM
I wish not to be trans too. I would be perfectly happy being a cis male or a cis female, but being trans is too much for me to process. The dysphoria is very unpleasant.
Finding acceptance is important, because this is a trait that does not ever go away. I found a measure of acceptance by accepting who I was and living as close to the gender line as I was personally comfortable with, and being frank with my closest friends and family.
Nevertheless, there's still a lot of pain that I buried over the years. But I wasn't suicidal. I had a life and held down a job.
I would be remiss if I didn't point out that many trans peoples' feelings of dysphoria are lessened on hormones. Our brains respond different to sex hormones from cis people.
Even with a therapist you're going to have to diagnose yourself by stating whether or not you feel that you have a problem with the gender you were assigned....?
No therapist or doctor can tell you that you are trans, I think you have to state to them yourself that you believe you are in the wrong gender and desire some kind of resolution or help with that.
You can help yourself by reading the experiences of other transpeople and seeing if what you feel correlates with what they say they are feeling about the same thing. That might help you come to a conclusion more easily. Even so, I guess it's up to you to explore your own gender identity and decide how serious the problem is.
Quote from: T.K.G.W. on April 21, 2016, 02:19:51 PM
You can help yourself by reading the experiences of other transpeople and seeing if what you feel correlates with what they say they are feeling about the same thing. That might help you come to a conclusion more easily.
Yeah, this is what I did when I found out what transgender meant. I would listen to other transgender people and would cry so much because they were saying the
exact same things I was feeling.
For yourself, you don't need anyone to 'diagnose' you, but for a lot of country's legal and medical systems, sadly we do. :C
Being trans isn't a mental illness, it's the result of your brain having partly or completely developed as the opposite sex to your physical and genetic one. This can happen because the thing that determines whether your brain develops as male or female isn't genes, it's hormones. All that needs to happen is for something to disrupt your hormone production during the second and/or third trimester of your prenatal development, and you can end up with a "brain sex" that doesn't match your physical sex (whereas hormone disruption during the first trimester tends to cause intersex related genital abnormalities instead).
https://www.quora.com/What-causes-a-person-to-be-transgender/answer/Hugh-Easton-1
A lot of us seem to have subtle physical differences from cis people of our birth sex, such as endocrine abnormalities and other symptoms often associated with intersex conditions. For instance, I saw one study of FTM transgender people in which over half of the participants had PCOS or hyperandrogenism (higher than normal female androgen production), even prior to starting on hormones. However that doesn't always happen, and there's no actual test for being trans. One thing that might help with diagnosis though, is trying a low dose of trans HRT (i.e. estradiol for MTF's, or testosterone for FTM's). If you are trans, you should feel an improvement in your psychological wellbeing from the hormones (whereas if you aren't trans, they'll probably make you feel worse!). That's the closest thing I know of to a test for being trans. Just reading on this site what other people have said about their life experiences can probably give you a fair idea of whether you're trans or not though, since most of us seem to go through a lot of the same things.
Resoundingly NO. You know who you are. See Cindy's post below.
SOC is clear. The medics don't diagnose you, they help you deal with the issues you may face and with any PTSD that you may have developed from your past. They also need to deal with any other issues that may prevent you from being happy. They also screen people for DID, which may present as identifying as trans when in fact the person is not.
In general 60-70% of people presenting to a therapist need no more help than guidance through the process, the other 30% or so may need some sort of therapy.
You've got it quite wrong really. It's the opposite. Like others have already stated, the only person who can know you have gender dysphoria is yourself. The reason you have to go to therapy for a prescription is because testosterone is considered to have risks that you shouldn't really be able to just go out and ask for some; whether you're cis or trans. Also, my psychologist told me that he isn't letting a lot of his patients go on testosterone because they're mentally unstable. They have to make sure you're ready mentally for the changes. I don't think the point of seeing a gender therapist is to prove your identity.
Whoever is telling you that obviously isn't educated and quite literally can't understand because they're not trans themselves. You need to not take what they say as if it's truth, they don't know what they're talking about.
Absolutely. Only you can really know if you have dysphoria! Do cis people need a therapist to tell them if they are men or women? I guess not!
A therapist can only help you if you find yourself questioning yourself and not being sure. They can help you find out the answers like someone else here said. But no therapist can tell you what your gender is.
I cant relate to the "questioning my gender" thing because I've never questioned my being male. I just didn't know how to express it or how to call this feeling of being the opposite of what my body is. I didn't know that the term trans existed, or that other people were like me. A therapist back then could have helped me understand what my feelings were and that it was called transsexualism and that I wasn't the only one. But no therapist can tell you that you are a man or a woman or other. Only you can know for sure!
Quote from: jossam on April 29, 2016, 09:35:03 PM
A therapist can only help you if you find yourself questioning yourself and not being sure.
I couldn't disagree more. Done correctly, "therapist" is a mischaracterization. I think "Monitor" better defines the role. Most of us don't question who we are and don't appreciate others imposing their beliefs on us. The process for reconciling body with brain is a complex series of tasks involving many specialists. A good monitor charts our progress and questions how we're managing the disruption of everything we've done in our lives up to that point. Changing our social identity isn't fun; it's damn hard work.
I appreciated having someone who would calm my fears and provide context to my exuberance. I thought I had everything locked down, all by myself. But there were a dozen things that never crossed my mind. My monitor wasn't a rookie; her insight made my transition less stressful than it could have been. She kept me focused on the important stuff. I have no doubt my monitor made significant contributions to the successful outcome of my reassignment.
If your therapist makes you believe he/she is in control of your life, find someone else.
Diane, I don't understand the reason why you disagree.
I'm not saying therapists don't help making transitions easier, less stressful or scary or whatever.
And I'm not saying therapists should be in control of your life. No one should be in control of anyone else's life.
What I meant is that a therapist can help you guide you through your decisions in life.
I certainly didn't need a "professional" to tell me I'm trans; I've known since I was 4 years old (and before I had a word for it) in 1974.
Quote from: smittydoyle on April 30, 2016, 04:09:43 PM
I certainly didn't need a "professional" to tell me I'm trans; I've known since I was 4 years old (and before I had a word for it) in 1974.
Same here! Knew it ever since I was that young! I just had no idea what to call it or what it was exactly. I was just like "I feel like I'm a boy! Why am I a girl? I'm not a girl, why do people think I'm a girl?". Then puberty made it worse because the wrong hormones etc. and then I started learning it was a thing and its name and that other people were like me! And now I'm getting more advanced with trans activism language, definitions, etc. so it's much easier now to express myself. But I've always known. I've always known I just wasn't gay but it was something else!
I'm 43 and I absolutely need a professional to tell me whether I am trans or not. Those of you who knew from a young age are lucky in a way. Knowing early decant make your struggle any easier but it is a different type of struggle. You know what you are and need to find a way to live with it or to transition or whichever path you take. But the bottom line is, deep inside you know yourself and you know who and what you are.
At my age, for whatever reason, I don't know who or what I am. I have never felt deep inside me that I "know" I'm a girl and wondering why I have a boy body. If it is something I know, it is buried so deep that the only thing I do know is that I am so incredibly confused I don't know how to function any more. I most definitely need a therapist to tell me if I am trans, or at the very least help clear my mind up so that I know for myself what I am.
I hope I managed to say that in a clear enough way to convey what I meant without offending anyone. I am very envious of all of you that have known from a young age. Not knowing who or what you ate is an awful feeling.
Quote from: jayne01 on April 30, 2016, 08:40:02 PM
I'm 43 and I absolutely need a professional to tell me whether I am trans or not. Those of you who knew from a young age are lucky in a way. Knowing early decant make your struggle any easier but it is a different type of struggle. You know what you are and need to find a way to live with it or to transition or whichever path you take. But the bottom line is, deep inside you know yourself and you know who and what you are.
At my age, for whatever reason, I don't know who or what I am. I have never felt deep inside me that I "know" I'm a girl and wondering why I have a boy body. If it is something I know, it is buried so deep that the only thing I do know is that I am so incredibly confused I don't know how to function any more. I most definitely need a therapist to tell me if I am trans, or at the very least help clear my mind up so that I know for myself what I am.
I hope I managed to say that in a clear enough way to convey what I meant without offending anyone. I am very envious of all of you that have known from a young age. Not knowing who or what you ate is an awful feeling.
Some people are non-binary. I'm not saying you are, but it's a possibility. Anyway, if you feel like you need someone to help you figure out, then go ahead. Sounds like you're in distress and need someone to guide you until you're able to find the answer.
I knew I was transgender as soon as the word was defined for me. Before that, I just didn't have a word for how I felt. Did I need a professional to diagnose me? Mostly no, but a little yes.
Mostly no because like I said, I knew how I felt, what I had gone through, and why I felt those things. I knew the relief I felt in finding a term that actually fit everything I had experienced; a term that gave me a path forward to resolution. No matter what anyone else said, they don't know me that way - I know me. And you know you. You know you on a level that no one else does, so who are they to say that your feelings are false just because they haven't been validated by a professional at this point?
But I also say a little yes, because there is great power in that affirmation. The first few people I came out to were family members and they all asked the same series of questions - How long have you known? What do you want to do now? Have you talked to a professional? It is a great relief to be able to say yes, I've spoken to a qualified mental health practitioner who agrees that I'm transgender and thinks that hormones and surgery are the correct choices for me at this time.
And that sounds pretty similar to the issues you're having. While I absolutely don't think it's necessary to have a formal diagnosis in order to know that you're trans or what you want out of a transition, I think talking to a professional and getting an opinion can help the way that others (especially cis folks with little exposure to trans people) perceive the seriousness with which you're approaching transition.
What if some mental health professional dismisses a trans person as mentally ill or doesn't believe them? I know official medicine does not consider ->-bleeped-<- a mental illness, but the prejudice might still be there for some people.
Or not believing the patient's feelings. It happened to me that my former therapist didn't believe I could have certain feelings when I was a child. It also happened that she said she was curious to see pictures of me when I had long-ish hair. I found all of this + a question of chest size extremely inappropriate. I stayed quiet and polite (it was a mistake because I should have told her it is inappropriate to treat a patient like that). After this I immediately decided to dump her and wait until another therapist was available. I didn't want to see her anymore.
It's hard to get loud and talk and complain when everyone else around you is in a position of social power because they are doctors and psychologists and you're just a vulnerable patient who needs help. But I swore to myself I would never let any other therapist or doctor or anyone else talk to me like that. What an absolutely negative experience that left me a bit shocked.
So....if you find the wrong therapist they can actually harm you instead of helping you. A good, professional one, on the other hand will know how to treat people, trans or not.
I don't think you need a professional to tell you you're trans; but it's healthier to see someone to put your mind at rest that you don't have a personality disorder which could cause you to feel trans. And like max said it's good to have the confirmation for family members because they seem to think immediately you don't know your own mind. Then again that perpetuates the believe trans can be diagnosed. I don't think you should have to jump through hoops to please multiple therapists; having to lie to make them believe you perfectly fit the stereotype of a trans man in order to get the hormones you need or to wait until 18 to get help because that somehow means you don't consider trans to be a phase and you're serious about it. One therapy appointment seems fair to rule out any mental health problems and to see if you're mentally ready; then they should just give you the hormones.
From reading other people's posts about seeing therapists I find the American system to be absurd. Your expected to look online to find a therapist who has 'experience with gender identity' written on their profile; which could either mean they have up to date knowledge that trans is a neurological condition and you don't have to fit the stereotype or could mean I'm going to say you're confused and talk you out of 'harming' yourself. And then you have to go see the therapist hoping they're the former or if they end up being the latter you leave the session more depressed and dysphoric than you were before. In the UK you go to a gender identity clinic; whether private or rum by the NHS and you're guranteed that the therapists have good knowledge on trans people; not just the condition but what they have to go through.
Sorry for the slight rant; correct me if I misunderstand anything.
Quote from: Elis on May 01, 2016, 07:39:19 AM
I don't think you need a professional to tell you you're trans; but it's healthier to see someone to put your mind at rest that you don't have a personality disorder which could cause you to feel trans. And like max said it's good to have the confirmation for family members because they seem to think immediately you don't know your own mind. Then again that perpetuates the believe trans can be diagnosed. I don't think you should have to jump through hoops to please multiple therapists; having to lie to make them believe you perfectly fit the stereotype of a trans man in order to get the hormones you need or to wait until 18 to get help because that somehow means you don't consider trans to be a phase and you're serious about it. One therapy appointment seems fair to rule out any mental health problems and to see if you're mentally ready; then they should just give you the hormones.
From reading other people's posts about seeing therapists I find the American system to be absurd. Your expected to look online to find a therapist who has 'experience with gender identity' written on their profile; which could either mean they have up to date knowledge that trans is a neurological condition and you don't have to fit the stereotype or could mean I'm going to say you're confused and talk you out of 'harming' yourself. And then you have to go see the therapist hoping they're the former or if they end up being the latter you leave the session more depressed and dysphoric than you were before. In the UK you go to a gender identity clinic; whether private or rum by the NHS and you're guranteed that the therapists have good knowledge on trans people; not just the condition but what they have to go through.
Sorry for the slight rant; correct me if I misunderstand anything.
Nope, that is accurate. Unfortunately, the US is a much larger place than the UK and we don't have any kind of nationalized healthcare. So getting a uniform experience from person to person is almost impossible unless they are both using the same providers. We currently don't have any standards or credentialing for folks who want to call themselves gender therapists, though I have been told WPATH is working to correct that. So whenever that comes around, that should make a big difference in the quality of people's experiences. And until then - there are plenty of competent options for people to pursue, they just need to do their research.
That isn't to say NHS is the ideal. As much as it would be nice to know that my providers are knowledgeable and to not have to worry about the expenses involved with transition, the associated wait times and limited surgical options in country would not make me a happy camper. And that unfortunately seems to be the trade off between the US and UK systems.
QuoteI don't think you need a professional to tell you you're trans; but it's healthier to see someone to put your mind at rest that you don't have a personality disorder which could cause you to feel trans.
There are trans people who have personality disorders. One doesn't exclude the other. I don't think a personality disorder can make a person feel trans in a constant, genuine way. BPD might cause some people to feel like they desperately need to fit somewhere so they might pick labels in order to feel like they belong but what is more likely to happen is that some doctors just don't believe being trans is possible or don't approve of it, so they use disorders like BPD to "justify it", but one can also be BPD and be trans, just like one can be schizophrenic and genuinely trans. BPD has a lot of symptoms that overlap with other disorders (depression, anxiety, substance abuse, dissociative disorders). Bad psychiatrists/therapists can use BPD as a weapon when they don't understand what the patient really has, and yes it can include being trans, resulting in wrong diagnosis. BPD can be overly diagnosed.
At some point in my life I could fit at least 8 BPD criteria out of 9. Now things got better and I'm much more stable.
QuoteOne therapy appointment seems fair to rule out any mental health problems
Things like this make it sound like trans people are required to have zero mental issues in order to be taken seriously by doctors. It's impossible. Being trans can cause things like depression, anxiety, social anxiety. Most trans people struggle with feelings of depression. Negative experiences in life can cause the development of personality disorders during teenage years and early adulthood, and we all know being trans isn't easy and can make us experience bad stuff over the years.
I was diagnosed with anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder....no doctor can tell me these disorders invalidate my choice to transition. No doctor can invalidate my trans identity just because of those disorders. I know myself more than any other doctor in the world, because it's me, it's my mind and I live with it all the time. And I study mental disorders, especially personality disorders, so doctors can't really come to me and talk bs and pull the wrong diagnosis because they have someone who's very educated about these matters right in front of them, and I wouldn't believe them or I'd question their real intentions. It's easy for me to spot when a therapist is skeptical or has "bad intentions".
Mental health professionals can be very unprofessional. They can be very biased. They can also be ignorant about their own field. Some people treat them like gods on earth. I say be careful, cause there are many psychiatrists and psychologists that cause trouble.
Sorry; I didn't make my point very clear :/. I understand you can have BPD and still be trans; that why I said could cause you to feel trans. And I also understand you can have mental health problems which don't invalidate you being trans at all. I meant there are a minority of people who may have something else which makes them feel trans. It's rare but happens. For me personally I was and am 100% sure I'm trans; but I couldn't stop my mind from believing the worst. So seeing a therapist helped even though she was up to date on what trans is; so knew she couldn't diagnose me. But was able to rule out anything else.
I agree mental health professionals can be biased and take advantage of patients. That's why I made the point about the American health system.
It's ok Elis. Yeah only we can know for sure. We have to analyze ourselves a lot during therapy so we can describe ourselves accurately. I had a therapist say I am incredibly capable of having a lot of insight. And this other therapist kinda said it too the other day. Maybe it's because I wanted to become a psychiatrist. Haha.
Well, in America there's this religious anti-trans movement and the conversion therapies, so lgbt people there should be extra careful. Not saying these things don't exist in other countries, but the US has this large religious fundies community and it has political support. I know conversion therapies are illegal there but I read they found ways to avoid the US law :/