Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Topic started by: Princess on October 21, 2007, 07:58:30 AM

Title: Passing without trying
Post by: Princess on October 21, 2007, 07:58:30 AM
A couple months ago I was in Virginia and I seemed to get called ma'am and thought of being a girl by three different women. I think of it as a good thing, but at the same time, I'm not started on HRT, and I haven't technically started transitioning. When I get called this in public by certain others, it makes me wonder what to do with restrooms. In Pennsylvania I don't think I ever was thought of as female, so that causes problems for me.
Title: Re: Passing without trying
Post by: katia on October 21, 2007, 08:06:36 AM
Passing without trying

it's happened to me since before hrt.  >sigh<  what a nightmare! ::)
Title: Re: Passing without trying
Post by: zombiesarepeaceful on October 22, 2007, 03:53:16 PM
Happened to me too. I was pre transition so I still used the women's restroom -gag-. I even got thrown out of the women's room once. I never tried to pass as male before I transitioned but it made me happy when I did. If there's a unisex restroom use that, otherwise I'd say if you're dressed male, unshaven, not presenting as female, use the men's. If you're presenting as female, use the women's.
Title: Re: Passing without trying
Post by: J.T. on October 22, 2007, 09:43:00 PM
the bathroom issue is a tough one... honestly i don't think you'll get kicked out of a women's room if you think you are passing and yet you aren't.  Women's rooms tend to be "safer" with these sort of things.  Mostly they will just stare.  So if you're really unsure, go with your gut.
Title: Re: Passing without trying
Post by: carol_w on October 23, 2007, 11:28:13 AM
In my experience, most of the time, you'll be totally safe if you just go in, do "your business", wash your hands, and leave.  I've done this A LOT of times, and as long as you're halfway passing, you'll be ok.  Don't speak to anyone else, don't try to fix your makeup or your wig (unless you're by yourself in there), just get in and get out ASAP. 

That's just IMHO.  YMMV.

Carol
Title: Re: Passing without trying
Post by: Jay on October 23, 2007, 03:35:32 PM
Quote from: J.T. on October 22, 2007, 09:43:00 PM
the bathroom issue is a tough one... honestly i don't think you'll get kicked out of a women's room if you think you are passing and yet you aren't.  Women's rooms tend to be "safer" with these sort of things.  Mostly they will just stare.  So if you're really unsure, go with your gut.

Exactly!