Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transitioning => Facial feminization surgery => Topic started by: 2cherry on July 02, 2016, 08:26:43 PM

Title: Any disappointments?
Post by: 2cherry on July 02, 2016, 08:26:43 PM
I hope some of you will come out of the woodwork on this one, because I'm still assessing my own FFS surgery. All surgery has complications and risks, but what about disappointments? is there anyone that advises against having FFS? If so, I really want to hear from you here, or in a PM.  Although my FFS is planed, but I just want to make a good and informed decision. Because it's not something trivial. I know the benefits, the possible happiness, but I also want to hear the opposite. I'm not afraid of stories, so if you want to share, please do...
Title: Re: Any disappointments?
Post by: Dena on July 02, 2016, 08:53:39 PM
The most important thing to understand about any plastic surgery is you shouldn't expect it to solve all your problems. Be willing to accept the limitations of the surgery and you will be happy with the results. CIS women and some members of the site have unrealistic expectations for the surgery and when the first surgery fails to produce the expected results, they are after the second, third, fourth surgery and are still unhappy. FFS can produce stunning results but if you are unable to see them, you will be unhappy with the results. If you can't see it for yourself, trust the judgement of others.
Title: Re: Any disappointments?
Post by: confused_very on July 03, 2016, 06:23:50 AM
I am also booked in for facial surgery in September  but with Dr DiMaggio.
I have confidence that the surgeon will remove the parts that make me self conscious about the male features: jaw line and brow/forehead. The unknown is my nose, if there seems to be consistency in revisions and disappointments, it is with people's noses.
I don't know if it is because people go into it expecting a particular sort of nose and that it takes so long to heal, and the expectations are dashed that even after waiting a long time, it isn't what they had hoped.
I am probably exacerbating the issue also because I can't define the way I would prefer my nose to look instead, only that i know what i don't like about it which kind of means i am in the hands of what the doctor deems aesthetically pleasing rather than myself.
I don't know what other people do there, taking in lots of pictures of noses i don't know if it is helpful or not, as a nose is usually complimented around the other features of ones face, so wanting a type of nose that isn't complementary to the face is also a recipie for disappointment.
That is the one thing that i just don't know.
Title: Re: Any disappointments?
Post by: 2cherry on July 03, 2016, 07:25:48 AM
Quote from: Dena on July 02, 2016, 08:53:39 PM
The most important thing to understand about any plastic surgery is you shouldn't expect it to solve all your problems. Be willing to accept the limitations of the surgery and you will be happy with the results. CIS women and some members of the site have unrealistic expectations for the surgery and when the first surgery fails to produce the expected results, they are after the second, third, fourth surgery and are still unhappy. FFS can produce stunning results but if you are unable to see them, you will be unhappy with the results. If you can't see it for yourself, trust the judgement of others.

Thanks Dena, now that the date is drawing closer, I'm very nervous about it...
Title: Re: Any disappointments?
Post by: 2cherry on July 03, 2016, 07:28:56 AM
Quote from: confused_very on July 03, 2016, 06:23:50 AM
The unknown is my nose, if there seems to be consistency in revisions and disappointments, it is with people's noses.

That's also what I'm afraid of... the nose, and also the lip lift... when I roll my top lip up with my pinky, I can see a bit how it would look like, but it's so difficult to imagine it when it's done. I asked my surgeon to be very careful with the plastic/soft tissues, and be very conservative. The bone work I don't care, I hope he's aggressive on that, but the plastic/soft tissues is what can make or destroy a face.
Title: Re: Any disappointments?
Post by: on July 06, 2016, 04:17:30 PM
Quote from: confused_very on July 03, 2016, 06:23:50 AM
The unknown is my nose, if there seems to be consistency in revisions and disappointments, it is with people's noses.

Aye, it's a fact that rhinoplasty is the most common procedure where patients get a revision.  The reason is pretty obvious: it's the largest feature on our face that is conveniently placed right smack in the middle of everything else... and it's very delicate and complex.  During healing, irregularities can and do arise; the entire bridge can shift; blood bumps can form and harden (I don't know what they're called medically) and even a skilled surgeon can have difficulty with obtaining perfect symmetry.

Dena said it very well; disappointments can be minimized with realistic expectations.

The alternative???  Keep your masculine features for life, you brave soul you (not an option for some [most??] of us).
Title: Re: Any disappointments?
Post by: Debra on July 07, 2016, 08:17:55 AM
Great thread to keep tabs on.

I've heard from friends that one of the mistakes they made was doing too much at once. Like upper and lower face all at once.....it was a LOT of recovery and a lot of different variables.

I've taken tips from that and I'm only doing upper face this round. Lower face doesn't bother me so much so we'll see in a couple years if I even want to mess with it.
Title: Re: Any disappointments?
Post by: deeiche on July 07, 2016, 11:11:13 AM
Quote from: Debra on July 07, 2016, 08:17:55 AM
Great thread to keep tabs on.

I've heard from friends that one of the mistakes they made was doing too much at once. Like upper and lower face all at once.....it was a LOT of recovery and a lot of different variables.

I've taken tips from that and I'm only doing upper face this round. Lower face doesn't bother me so much so we'll see in a couple years if I even want to mess with it.
I did everything at once, knowing it would not be optimum, but for a variety of reasons 2 different surgeries would not work for me.  I am happy with the outcome.
Title: Re: Any disappointments?
Post by: 2cherry on July 07, 2016, 12:08:20 PM
What I'm afraid of regarding the nose... is the size, too small and small nostrils... smaller nostrils means less airflow and more difficult to breath in air (pulling harder because opening is smaller?), and breathing issues makes me anxious..
Title: Re: Any disappointments?
Post by: deeiche on July 07, 2016, 02:15:33 PM
Quote from: 2cherry on July 07, 2016, 12:08:20 PM
What I'm afraid of regarding the nose... is the size, too small and small nostrils... smaller nostrils means less airflow and more difficult to breath in air (pulling harder because opening is smaller?), and breathing issues makes me anxious..
yes, you should be concerned.  When I transitioned in the mid 1980's I had two rhinoplasties.  The result of the second one was a right nasal passage that was so narrow when I breathed in it would completely collapse.  I wore a breathe rite strip to bed every night for ~ 15 years, otherwise I woke with a sinus headache.  This was diagnosed as "nasal valve collapse", which required "nasal valve repair" to remedy it.

I asked Dr Rossi if he could repair my nasal valve issue during FFS and he said yes.  My breathing is much improved since surgery.
Title: Re: Any disappointments?
Post by: clawdeenwolf on July 07, 2016, 09:01:56 PM
Quote from: confused_very on July 03, 2016, 06:23:50 AM
I am also booked in for facial surgery in September  but with Dr DiMaggio.
I have confidence that the surgeon will remove the parts that make me self conscious about the male features: jaw line and brow/forehead. The unknown is my nose, if there seems to be consistency in revisions and disappointments, it is with people's noses.
I don't know if it is because people go into it expecting a particular sort of nose and that it takes so long to heal, and the expectations are dashed that even after waiting a long time, it isn't what they had hoped.
I am probably exacerbating the issue also because I can't define the way I would prefer my nose to look instead, only that i know what i don't like about it which kind of means i am in the hands of what the doctor deems aesthetically pleasing rather than myself.
I don't know what other people do there, taking in lots of pictures of noses i don't know if it is helpful or not, as a nose is usually complimented around the other features of ones face, so wanting a type of nose that isn't complementary to the face is also a recipie for disappointment.
That is the one thing that i just don't know.

I'm consulting with DMD! I am confident in his work!
He sent me a medical questionnaire but I'm not sure how to respond to it? Do I download it and then fill it out then send it via email or do i print it out and take it with me?
Title: Re: Any disappointments?
Post by: deeiche on July 07, 2016, 09:51:41 PM
Quote from: clawdeenwolf on July 07, 2016, 09:01:56 PM
I'm consulting with DMD! I am confident in his work!
He sent me a medical questionnaire but I'm not sure how to respond to it? Do I download it and then fill it out then send it via email or do i print it out and take it with me?
I would fill it out, then send it back.  Since it's your medical records you can put a password on it that you convey to them via a different email.

But really, this is the type of question you should pose directly to the Dr.
Title: Re: Any disappointments?
Post by: EmilyMK03 on July 08, 2016, 12:02:38 AM
Quote from: Debra on July 07, 2016, 08:17:55 AM
I've heard from friends that one of the mistakes they made was doing too much at once. Like upper and lower face all at once.....it was a LOT of recovery and a lot of different variables.

I've taken tips from that and I'm only doing upper face this round. Lower face doesn't bother me so much so we'll see in a couple years if I even want to mess with it.

It's more expensive to do it piecemeal like that, but if it works for you, then great!  It's what I'm doing too actually.  I first had just a rhinoplasty.  And I'm now planning to go in for a brow bossing and trachea shave.  And who knows what I'll do in the future?  (but hopefully I'll be happy enough with my face after 2 surgeries, lol)

I can't imagine having both nose work AND chin/jaw work done at the same time.  I can't imagine how miserable it must be to be unable to fully breathe from both your nose and your mouth at the same time during the recovery process.   ugh.
Title: Re: Any disappointments?
Post by: deeiche on July 08, 2016, 07:07:13 AM
Quote from: EmilyMK03 on July 08, 2016, 12:02:38 AM
I can't imagine having both nose work AND chin/jaw work done at the same time.  I can't imagine how miserable it must be to be unable to fully breathe from both your nose and your mouth at the same time during the recovery process.   ugh.
Well, it was pretty miserable, however my surgeries are now over.  the thought of going in for multiple surgeries over time was not something I was willing to do.  it brought back memories from 35 years ago, rhinoplasty and trachea shave one year, following year corrective rhinoplasty and breast augmentation, following year SRS.  A year or so after SRS I felt like I needed to have surgery again.  I felt like withdrawal symptoms, something I'd had from early drug addiction.

No reflection on your specific decision to have multiple surgeries over time.  However I do believe some people develop an "addiction" to surgery, no amount of surgery gets them satisfactory results.  I believe I've read some posts here that support that perspective.
Title: Re: Any disappointments?
Post by: 2cherry on July 08, 2016, 04:25:50 PM
Quote from: deeiche on July 08, 2016, 07:07:13 AM
No reflection on your specific decision to have multiple surgeries over time.  However I do believe some people develop an "addiction" to surgery, no amount of surgery gets them satisfactory results.  I believe I've read some posts here that support that perspective.

I must admit, I found the anesthesia for my SRS really good... haven't slept like that in years, and maybe the anesthetics and morphine pump that I got, does something to the nervous system, because these are narcotics... I've had days where I dream of being in such deep sleep, almost coma state of being. I really felt that 6 hours wastaken from me. It wasn't anything like sleep, it was much deeper and more confusing to know that 6 hours was taken from me with no recollection. To this day, I feel like I miss 6 hours of my life... it's really strange.
Title: Re: Any disappointments?
Post by: Debra on July 08, 2016, 05:04:49 PM
Quote from: deeiche on July 08, 2016, 07:07:13 AM
Well, it was pretty miserable, however my surgeries are now over.  the thought of going in for multiple surgeries over time was not something I was willing to do.  it brought back memories from 35 years ago, rhinoplasty and trachea shave one year, following year corrective rhinoplasty and breast augmentation, following year SRS.  A year or so after SRS I felt like I needed to have surgery again.  I felt like withdrawal symptoms, something I'd had from early drug addiction.

No reflection on your specific decision to have multiple surgeries over time.  However I do believe some people develop an "addiction" to surgery, no amount of surgery gets them satisfactory results.  I believe I've read some posts here that support that perspective.

Yeah for me, it's also that my chin doesn't bother me nearly as much as forehead and nose. So it's completely possible I wont want chin work done at all afterward but we'll see.