Ive been thinking about this the last days of talking to a friend about me knowing Im a girl. Ive only told a few people before my secret and well one never was really truly accepting and the other person who while accepting, we lost contact. I didnt think it really got harder to deal even though Ive heard it does as you get older. It seems lately it's been really tough.
All I want to be is me yet I can't seem to talk yet Im suffering inside.
I wrestle a LOT with outing myself to others. Especially when I was in Social Justice Warrior mode about my companies health insurance and Trans Exclusion for my HRT coupled with all the fallout at the time from a state whose name I dare not speak. All sorts of "Diversity" platitudes in our multi-national policies yet..... where the rubber meets the road, diversity can go suck wind. I outed myself to HR in hopes of someday the injustice will be corrected.
Then came to the ..... Euphoria? I survived so why stop there? And, my sister with whom I've really been wrestling about this with since we were pretty close....
Of course there is always the "You are Only As Sick As Your Secrets".
I've come a long way in loosing a lot of the Shame I accumulated over a lifetime of actively fighting being trans. I've done a few, totally out of character, things to further loose the shame and guilt like therapy and doctors for HRT, even having Transgender officially 'On the record'. I don't WANT to feel like a freak.
What I want, and what others can feel......
Only you know if it's worth the risk
It's true that gets worse over time and tears us up inside. For me sharing with a good friend of mine, who I was scared to tell, was a big relief to me. Sorry that they were not truly excepting. Sadly we will have many that are that way, but don't let that discourage you. Hugs
Mariah
I've found, for myself at any rate, that it helps to know what you want out of telling that person. Friend or not there may only be so much they can help you with, especially if they don't understand what being trans really means. If you know who you are and know what you want to do going forward with your gender identity then it makes it easier to be clear with them. If you're still confused or vague or not sure what you expect/want from them, then outing yourself might not be everything you are hoping for.