I have been asked to educate the Women at Work about how We are not a threat to them while using the restrooms .have any of You had any experience of doing this and can give any help and advice .I am currently the only transwoman at work and because of a major move around there are now a lot more female office workers using the toilets near Me .I am hoping somebody will have done a policy or set letter that I can use as a Guide towards helping ease their concerns and put their minds at rest
I think the fear lies in a misconception that trans mtf are simply men who for whatever reason choose to be different. So, being men they still have the typical male behavior patterns. This is on top of the unspoken assumption that all men are sexual predators just waiting for an opportunity. So, while speaking about policy letters is necessary, it won't address the real root issue.
I think you should assume your audience at least unconsciously believes what I have stated above and address those fears directly. So begin with a primer on what is trans, next use some actual crime statistics and quotes from places that have had these policies for a long time without any issues, and then get into your company's specific policy, if there is one. I think doing it that way addressed their fear of a threat.
My answer is going to be a tad bit on the crass side of things, especially as I have yet to actually come out, let alone start any kind of formal transition process, but much like lesbian cis-women, trans-women are only in there to use the bathroom. I know that when I use the bathroom (be it male, female, neutral/unisex) I'm only in there to use the bathroom, not check out other folks. Heck in a men's room I head directly for the stall with the door instead of a urinal (I know, TMI) simply on the off chance that someone might otherwise think something about something that ain't happening.
When I use the ladies room as Donna in the Pacific Northwest, I have never even had a what-are-you-doing-here kind of glance. Coming in and going out I pass by all kinds of women from young to old including mothers with children and women who have their husband or boyfriend outside the door. Even the waiting gentlemen outside the door do not give a look as I exit.
Maybe it's just Washington and Oregon.
As to your ongoing work environment, that could be very different. The workplace is too often a gossip place. As others have said, perhaps educating your co workers could be a good idea.
There is still the occasional puff of smoke coming out from my ears over the media coverage of a state whose name I dare not mention. That and my experience with the Maryland Senate hearings on the Trans-Rights, aka "Bathroom Bill" which eventually passed. It is amazing the propaganda and fear mongering that goes on.
Deborah covered the obvious
1) All men are scum (direct quote from about every female friend)
2) All men want sex
3) Men will seize any advantage they can to get sex, or just to "get off"
4) 12 y/o girls are especially yummy
There are plenty of laws on the books covering perverts and rapist be they wearing a dress, or it taking place in a rest-room. The stats plainly demonstrate that up untill the immediate aftermath of the State whose name I dare not mention, in districts that had bathroom bills in effect no trans person was ever charged with a crime. You're 12 year old daughters are perfectly safe. Well, just as safe as they otherwise would be.
I don't get all the hoopla myself. In guy mode I've had several experiences of women needing to advantage themselves of the empty stall in the Mens. Nobody freaked out, not even the woman being in the den of potential rapist. Like Geeker said, we just want to do our business and leave, just like any other woman.
If "You've been asked...." I sort of suspect there have been rumblings from your coworkers to HR. How comfortable are you with doing this? Essentially, I think you are being asked to make a case as to why you should not have to use a dedicated toilet.
There may be sites like the Transgender Law Project or others similar to it that have some material they can use. There are also outfits that do this sort of anti-discrimination training for a living.